In the Darkness - A Mai Otome ShizNat Story
by nh1021
Summary: The Bewitching Smile Amethyst, Shizuru Viola, has disappeared without a trace. Years later she returns, but not the same. A Mai Otome 'ShizNat' Story set after Zwei. -Heavy Romance & Drama, some SciFi, Angst, and if you squint you might see Humor- [Story COMPLETE 4-12-18]
1. Chapter 1

**In the Darkness**

 **A Mai Otome ShizNat Story**

 **Chapter 1**

Natsuki hastily walked the corridors of Garderobe with gritted teeth, tightened fists, and heated cheeks, rapidly heading to her office.

She was unable to control the blush that had appeared on her face. A blush caused by anger. Well, it was more because of jealousy and, perhaps, a little bit of anger.

"That woman" She muttered, slamming the door behind her. The slam that caused the room to echo for a few seconds.

Natsuki was usually a relatively calm, rational woman. But not right now, she was anything but calm right now.

She paced around her large office. Paced and paced and paced. She couldn't stand still, just didn't have it in her to do so. Not when her heart was beating this wildly, when her chest was heaving because of her rapid breathing and movements. She felt like her heart was about to beat out of her chest any given second.

She hastily removed her long, blue jacket and angrily tossed it on the couch. She needed air, needed to breathe, the piece of clothing felt so constricting against her slim body.

Then, she hastily removed her black tie, feeling as if it was choking her. She tossed that item on the couch as well.

"She always does this!" But this was all her fault. She couldn't blame Shizuru, and she knew it.

She knew that Shizuru always behaved the way she did only to get a rise out of her. That she openly flirted with others just to get some sort of public reaction out of her.

She wanted her to express her feelings, to say them aloud, to be more open about them, and that was hard for Natsuki to do. She wasn't good with feelings, she never has been. Never has been good at expressing said feelings in public, only behind closed doors.

And has never been good at saying those three-little-words out loud either, _not even_ behind closed doors.

She was a reserved woman, a timid woman, why couldn't Shizuru understand that?

Natsuki let out a frustrated sigh as she dropped on the couch. She quickly crossed her arms below her chest and angrily pouted. Angrily pouted as she stared head. Stared ahead at the wide, white wall.

She couldn't deny the connection she and Shizuru had. Ever since they were students in this very school, they had always had that connection, that pull. She had always felt that attraction towards her, felt drawn to her.

At first, it was because she admired the Pearl. She wanted to learn from her, wanted to be her Room Attendant to be closer to her. Wanted to be as strong and as smart and as swift as her.

But later, as time passed, as they got older, it developed into something deeper, into something more.

It developed into love.

Then, why?

Why couldn't she just tell her that she loved her? Why was it so hard for her to say those words to her?

Natsuki let out another irritated sigh and tilted her head back. A hand now massaging her furrowed brows, her Emerald eyes shut.

She knew Shizuru was aware of her feelings, just as she was aware of Shizuru's.

Shizuru herself had told her long ago, had told her that she loved her. That she was her most important person, the one she'd always protect, no matter what.

She knew that when Shizuru accepted her responsibility as a Meister Column, one of the main reasons she accepted was to be close to her, because she was aware ahead of time that the Second Column was retiring and they were thinking of offering Natsuki that position. She knew that if Natsuki accepted, that they'd work together, side by side, until the inability to do their job prevented it, or retirement came, or death separated them, death being one of the many risks of the job.

Natsuki heard the door open and then gently close. She didn't bother asking who it was or bothered facing the direction of the incoming visitor. Only one person came in without knocking or announcing themselves. And that person was the Third Column, the Bewitching Smile Amethyst, the Headmistress Deputy, Viola, Shizuru.

She heard as the woman slowly approached her. She heard as she stopped right behind her on the couch. Felt as the sides of her head moved a little downward, so she guessed the woman was probably propping herself there with both arms, staring at her in silence. She knew this for a fact, because, she could feel her wavy hair touching her cheeks.

Natsuki swallowed, and then let out another sigh. Not a frustrated one or an angry one, a soft one this time. She removed her fingers from her forehead and then opened her eyes to look up at those unaffected, Ruby ones.

Of course Shizuru was smiling. She got what she wanted, to get a rise out of her. To make her think of their unspoken relationship, to make her think of _her_.

"I did as I always do, so I couldn't have gone too far this time for Natsuki to have rushed out the way she had" Shizuru softly commented, staring at the beautiful woman below her.

Natsuki didn't say a word in return, just stared blankly at those Ruby eyes. After a few seconds passed, she slowly closed her Emerald ones and felt as Shizuru gave her a long kiss on the forehead, then on her nose, then a slow, tender brush of lips. A brush of lips that she did not reciprocate for she didn't move at all.

"If Natsuki doesn't want to see me behave that way anymore, she knows what she has to do, does she not?" Shizuru softly said to her, her left hand caressing the woman's left cheek.

Yes, Natsuki knew what she had to do. All she had to do was admit that they were in a relationship. Admit that she loved her. Admit those two things. That's all she had to do.

But of course Natsuki knew that they were in a relationship. For the past three and a half years, they did everything that lovers do, but behind closed doors and unseen eyes, that is.

They kissed, they caressed one another and spoke sweetly to one another, and they made sweet love when the mood was right. They also took vacations together, went out on dates, and from time to time, though it was rare, they had arguments, they fought.

It's not like the other Columns didn't know or noticed. It's not like the other Otomes and the people she worked with didn't know. They all knew. Natsuki knew that they knew.

Nao always made stupid comments to her from time to time about it, totally aggravating her. And Youko made sure to keep her informed on Shizuru's whereabouts and vital signs when she was out on missions, and always gave them their privacy whenever Shizuru walked into the room.

Natsuki knew that they knew. Absolutely, positively, definitely knew.

All Shizuru wanted was for Natsuki to at least admit it to their close friends. That way, she didn't feel like she's always hiding, like she was Natsuki's secret. It was one thing to keep their relationship private, which was understandable, but another was to keep it a secret.

She didn't like being a secret.

"If Natsuki wants to go back to being friends, she just has to say the word" Shizuru then softly said, but the smile was long gone. Her Ruby eyes did show a softness and understanding though.

Natsuki stared at those eyes of hers. She felt a pang in her chest by the sentence, always felt it when Shizuru said it. She had been saying that a lot as of late.

She knew that Shizuru didn't want to leave her. If she did, she would've done so already a long time ago. And she thought that by now, this fear of… what? She didn't know what it was. But whatever it was, she thought it would've been long gone. That by now, she would be able to admit to everyone that yes, they were together. That she was in love with the brunette.

Natsuki reached for the woman's face and gently caressed her. "You and I, we can never be just friends. You know this, I know this…" She softly told her. "We learned that the hard way long ago" And gently pulled her down into a kiss. A slowly kiss. A slow and chaste kiss. A SpiderMan - Mary Jane, 'I'm going to rock your world' upside down type of kiss.

"I know…" Shizuru whispered after their lips had parted.

They had tried it long ago, tried to ignore their feelings, to just be friends again, but it didn't work. That separation trial only lasted about five months. They ended up right back where they were. Back in each other's arms, in each other's beds.

"I love you, Natsuki" Shizuru then whispered, lips only centimeters apart. She really meant it. She meant every word. But she didn't mean to say it aloud though, didn't meant to voice it knowing what followed after that.

"I-I… I know" Natsuki replied, swallowing, and then felt as Shizuru slowly pulled away. Felt as her cheek slipped away from her fingertips.

Shizuru let out a sigh and added some distance between them. She calmly walked towards Natsuki's large, white, neat desk. The woman always had a pitcher with water there.

Shizuru was a little frustrated, that's for sure.

She knew that Natsuki loved her. She did. She could feel it when they made love, she could taste it on her lips, she could see it in her eyes, smell it on her skin. But why couldn't her voice say it? They had been together for a little over three years now and she has never said it, not even once. Not even when they were alone, or in bed. Never. She just couldn't understand it.

At first, she had been okay with it. When the first year passed them by, she had been okay with her not saying it.

But then the second year went by in the blink of an eye, and still, the woman wouldn't say the words. And now they were on their third year, and still nothing. Instead of moving forward, it felt like they were moving backwards.

Shizuru didn't think that this would bother her that much, since she did have her love, she could feel it, but it did. It really did.

And Natsuki was taking too long to realize that her _issues_ , that her inability to show affection in public was psychological. Shizuru knew the reason, but she didn't want to bring it up. She wanted Natsuki to figure this out on her own, to surpass this on her own, or ask for help if she needed, but at least figure it out.

"At what time do you leave for Aries tomorrow?" Natsuki asked, wanting to fill the silence that had settled between them.

Shizuru poured some water into a glass. "Early morning. I'm taking public transportation, so I'd like to get an early start" She replied before bringing the cup to her lips and taking a few sips.

She motioned for the pitcher, wondering if Natsuki wanted some water as well, but Natsuki declined with a gentle shake of her head.

"Would you like to have dinner by the garden tonight?" The blunette asked, standing and heading towards the brunette. She stood next to her, leaning on her desk, her right hand reaching for the brunette's. "I can have the cooks take it to us there" Her thumb caressing the brunette's hand so lovingly.

"Actually, I have dinner plans with Arika-san tonight" Shizuru removed her hand and added some distance between them again.

"Oh…"

"She asked me to help her with some of her subjects, she's having difficulties maintaining her grades. She's falling behind" Shizuru calmly explained, placing the now empty cup on the table. "Natsuki is the headmistress, she knows this already, does she not?"

Yes, Natsuki knew. She knew that Arika was having a hard time with her studies.

Arika was a Meister Otome now, she was Queen Mashiro's Otome. It was unheard of, for someone who had yet to graduate Garderobe to be a Meister Otome. They were trying very hard to correct this, to give Arika the proper education and training so that she can finally graduate. Or at least to teach the girl proper manners. But the girl was very thick headed, the only subject she was good at was combat training.

"Can… Can I come over to your quarters after dinner?" Natsuki then softly asked.

Shizuru wasn't sure why Natsuki even asked. Why she was asking for permission all the time. They were in a relationship, if she wanted to see her, all she had to do was knock on her door, all she had to do was show up.

This just added to her irritation. Her irritation that had been building for some time now.

"If Natsuki wants to, she can" Shizuru smiled at her, but unfortunately, that smile didn't reach her eyes, not today.

And Natsuki couldn't help and frown, averting her stare, she saw right through it.

Shizuru started to head towards the door. She'd love to stay a little more, loved being in Natsuki's company, but the atmosphere at the moment just wasn't pleasant, wasn't good.

"I'll see you a little later, ne?" She told her.

"Shi- Shizuru, wait" Natsuki reached out for her hand, preventing her from leaving just yet. "I'll figure things out, I promise" She knew Shizuru was getting frustrated with this relationship that seemed to be going nowhere.

Natsuki wished that she could let her go. There were other women out there lining up to be with her, women who were less complicated, who could give Shizuru what she wanted in a partner, in a relationship.

But she couldn't let her go. She did love her even though she didn't say it, didn't express it with words.

If only she could say it.

If only she could give Shizuru the satisfaction of hearing those words, things could be a little better.

If only she could.

The brunette let out a soft sigh. She nodded to her in acknowledgement, letting her know that she had heard. Then, lifted her hand to her lover's soft cheek and truly smiled at her this time, softly caressing her there.

"I'll see you later, ne?" She softly told her, leaning forward and giving her a sweet, lingering kiss on the lips.

"Okay" Was all Natsuki could say, a frown on her lips as she watched Shizuru walk away.

 **Later,**

 **That Night**

Shizuru was sitting on her long sofa chair by the window. In her right hand, she held a pen. She was writing a few thoughts in a notebook, a diary.

Her feet were up, bending just the right way, using it to support the notebook as she wrote.

She had finished taking a shower not too long ago and was already in her sleepwear. She was also wearing a white robe since it was a chilly night.

Ruby eyes looked out the window for a few moments, watching the bright, full moon above, there was not a cloud in sight. She thought for a few moments as she looked at it, then looked down at the page again, writing in neat cursive a few more thoughts.

It had been a long time since she had written down anything on the diary. She had been using this notebook since her Coral days. Only writing feelings and thoughts she thought were important. A way to bent her frustrations from time to time.

\- Knock -

\- Knock -

She heard a couple of knocks on the door, so she finished writing her last sentence on the small book and then closed it, resting it on her lap.

"It's open" Kyoto-ben said as she looked at the moon again. And soon heard the knob twist, but the door did not open.

"It's locked, Shizuru"

She heard the muffled voice. She must've forgotten to unlock the door after she had gotten dressed.

" _Ara~_ I'll be right there" She stood from her chair and headed towards her nightstand, opened the drawer and placed the diary inside.

"S-Shizuru, hurry up!"

Shizuru couldn't help and chuckle in amusement as she headed towards her door, thinking that Natsuki probably didn't want to be seen coming into her bedroom this late at night. It would only add more to the suspicions and chatter circulating around the school about them.

" _Kannin na_ , I forgot to unlock the door" Shizuru said as she let the blunette in. Then, she walked towards her vanity, sat on her chair, and grabbed her hairbrush. She hadn't brushed her brown tresses yet and she always did this before bedtime.

"Hey" Natsuki closed the door behind her, then slowly followed her there, both hands in her pockets. "I missed you at dinner" She timidly told her. She grabbed the brush from her lover's hand, then went ahead and gently brushed her long, thick hair for her.

"I missed you too" Shizuru softly gave in, always having a soft spot for her girlfriend. She could never stay mad at her for long. Natsuki was her weakness. Always has been.

"I… I have something for you" Natsuki then placed the brush on the vanity and reached for the woman's soft hand. "I know it's not exactly what you want, but hopefully it'll lead us in the right direction" Her hand went inside her robe's pocket. She and Shizuru wore the same robe, only that Natsuki's had the initials N. Kruger on the top, breast pocket, and Shizuru's had S. Viola.

"Even though I don't say it, I do feel it, Shizuru" She handed Shizuru a small piece of paper she had folded in four.

Shizuru looked at the note in her hand. When she opened it, her lips curved upward, softly smiling. The note wasn't very long, just a few simple words.

' _Shizuru, please remember that I love you. Natsuki'_

" _Ara~_ Natsuki is so sweet" Shizuru whispered, smiling at the note in her hand. "I wonder… Did Natsuki lock the door on her way in?" Then seductively asked, placing the note on the vanity. Her hands were now on Natsuki's robe and slowly loosening the tight knot.

"Um… N-No" Natsuki lightly blushed.

Shizuru then stood, leaned forward, and whispered in her ear: "Then I suggest Natsuki does so, right now" And placed a kiss on that same ear, "I'm going to make love to Natsuki all night long" Soon after capturing her earlobe with her teeth, earning her a whimper from the blushing blunette.

 **The Next Morning...**

Shizuru sat on the almost empty bus, wearing regular clothing to blend in with the crowd.

She wore her hair up in a high ponytail, and wore tight, white jeans. She wore a purple shirt, exposing her belly button, and a black blazer. Finishing the outfit with short, black boots.

Her small, beige suitcase was next to her on the empty seat. Her trip to Aries wouldn't be long, only a few days, so she needn't pack much.

Natsuki needed a representative from Garderobe to be present in some political negotiations, and the other Columns were currently out on missions, so Natsuki had sent Shizuru since she couldn't leave Garderobe unattended.

"I'll see you soon, Natsuki..." Shizuru's line of sight was on Garderobe. She stared at it, knowing that her lover, Natsuki, was there. She stared at the building for a long time until it was no longer in her sights.

" _Shizuru-san"_

Came the voice from her Gem. It was Youko.

" _Hai_ " Shizuru whispered, her left hand touching her Gem.

" _I need you to make a brief detour, I'm getting some strange readings and need someone to look at it. I'm sending you the coordinates now"_

"Understood" Kyoto-ben softly replied.

" _Be careful, Shizuru"_

She heard the woman say, and then the voice was gone.

She gracefully stood from her seat, picking up her luggage in the process, and got off the bus on the next stop, hearing some guys whistle as she did so.

She did look sexy today, Shizuru noted. The blunette herself had had a hard time taking her eyes off her or muttering a single, comprehensive word before she left Garderobe this morning.

Shizuru headed for a remote area where she could Materialize into her Robe. Once she did, she took off, flying. It took her approximately ten minutes to arrive at her destination.

Ruby eyes scanned the area in aerial view. A sea of sand below her, not single rock. The coordinates had led her to a dessert.

Shizuru went ahead and reached the ground. She put her luggage on the floor as she cautiously looked around. There was nothing out of the ordinary.

She then kneeled, touching the soft, grainy sand, feeling it in her hands. She smelled the air, heard the wind. Everything seemed normal. Too normal.

"Youko?" Shizuru called, "Are you sure you sent me the right coordinates? There seems to be nothing-"

But then, she suddenly felt it. Felt the anomaly.

Her feet were suddenly paralyzed, her hands couldn't move, her eyes couldn't blink. It just appeared out of nowhere, and it was sucking her in.

" _Are you sure? I'm getting some really strong readings now. Stronger than before"_

Shizuru looked ahead of her, at the darkness that now loomed her. Her Robe was no longer working, she was back in her normal clothing.

" _Shizuru?"_

A tear escaped her left eye. The darkness was slowly surrounding her. She could feel herself leaving, disappearing, could see herself vanishing.

There was no way she could get out of this. No way she could keep her promise to Natsuki. She had promised her, that, she'd be back from her trip before she knew it. That she wouldn't notice she was gone. That she'd be back home really soon.

But now, in her current predicament, she doesn't think she can come back at all.

"Youko" Shizuru quickly said before there was no time, before it was too late, "Please take care of Natsuki" Then added, "Tell her that I love her… A-And… That I won't be able to fulfill my promise. T-That I'm sorry" And then, in the blink of an eye, in a matter of a millisecond, she was gone.

The darkness had sucked her in completely.

She was gone.

 **Same time,**

 **Garderobe**

Youko's eyebrows furrowed as she looked at the large screen ahead, unsure of the readings she was receiving. Unsure if she wanted to believe them at all.

"Shizuru?" She called out to her, "Shizuru?" but no response.

The strong readings she had been getting all morning had suddenly vanished, disappeared. _Poof_ , just like that.

But not only that, Shizuru's Gem no longer appeared on her screen, Shizuru's vitals neither.

"Youko" Natsuki softly said as she came into the room. "Was Shizuru able to figure out those readings of yours?" But the woman said nothing, didn't even acknowledge her presence.

After some silence,

"Youko?" She tried again, cautiously walking towards her. "Have you heard from Shizuru?"

And Youko didn't know what to say. She looked at the Headmistress next to her, unsure how to break these news to her, her mouth still agape. So, so confused.

Natsuki then looked at the screen, her eyebrows furrowing. All the other Column's vitals and Gems were there, all of them except for Shizuru's.

"What's wrong with Shizuru's Gem?" Natsuki calmly asked, she should be able to see it on the screen, along with her vitals and location, but she didn't. None of that information was there.

After more silence,

"Youko, where's Shizuru?!" Natsuki then couldn't help and yell, and panic, all calmness long gone. The woman's long silence, it was nerve-wracking.

"I... I'm sorry" Youko said, still unsure if to believe what she saw.

But, what Shizuru had just said to her a moment ago, to take care of Natsuki, it could only mean one thing. It could only mean that what she was looking at, was right. That the information displaying on her screen was not wrong.

"I'm sorry, but… she's... gone"

Natsuki wasn't following. "W-What do you mean she's gone? Where is she?"

Youko looked at Natsuki in the eyes, sorrow and confusion were her expressions, a hand now resting on Natsuki's shoulder. "Shizuru's gone, Natsuki." Then, emphasized it one more time, "She's gone"

Natsuki trembled on the spot, taking a step back. "N-No, no you're wrong" And took another and another and another, "You're wrong!" Until she ran out of the room.

She quickly Materialized into her Robe and headed towards Shizuru's last known location. She wouldn't believe it until she saw it herself. She wanted to see with her own, teary eyes that the woman she loved was really dead, was really gone.

 **~ 0 ~**

* * *

 **Thanks for Reading!**

 **I hope you guys enjoyed this.**

 **Let me know your thoughts.**

 **Writing "For the love of ShizNat"**


	2. Chapter 2

**In the Darkness**

 **A Mai Otome ShizNat Story**

 **Chapter 2**

 **Two Years Later**

Natsuki stood by the window in her office. Her arms were folded over her chest. Her tired, Emerald eyes were staring at nothing in particular, not really settling on one specific thing.

The city of Wind Bloom, from this distance, looked so energetic, so lively at this time of night. Looked so pretty with all the colors and all the lights.

She could see bright reds, an array of oranges and yellows. She could see a large amount of whites as well. She could see as all the colors blurred in her eyes, meshing all together, becoming big, fuzzy blobs.

She felt as her lips quivered and heard as her throat let out a quiet sniffle. That's when she brought a hand up to her eyes to remove the tears of sadness that had accumulated there. A sadness in her heart that seemed to never end.

When she heard the door open and close behind her, she allowed herself to close her eyes for a moment. Just for a moment. She allowed herself to hear the steps that slowly approached her, allowed to let her mind wonder off for a little while, at least until the person spoke.

"I've brought you dinner, Natsuki"

That cheery, friendly voice, although it was nice to hear, wasn't the voice she wanted to hear. It wasn't _her_ voice. Her beloved's voice. The accented voice that she dearly missed.

"We missed you downstairs" Mai added, standing a few steps away from the desk with a tray in hand.

"Thank you, Mai" Natsuki softly said, now turning around to face her friend. "You really shouldn't have, I'm not really hungry" She walked over to her desk and sat on her chair. Her hands reached for a document that had been there, staring at her for a few months now.

Natsuki had some big decisions to make and she had prolonged them long enough. She was taking too long, too long to let go, too long to realize that Shizuru wasn't coming back. That she needed to pick someone to permanently take her place.

Both spots, the one for the Third Column and the one for Headmistress Deputy needed to be filled. Shizuru had filled both positions before. She was a Column, and her second hand. She knew that Mai couldn't be on standby forever, couldn't stay in Garderobe forever.

Natsuki was thankful enough that her friend was able to substitute for Shizuru for a little while. Was thankful that she was able to take over some of her duties these past two years. She was glad that she was able to help out with missions when needed, since they were a little short staffed. But she knew the woman wanted to go back to Black Valley, the place she now calls home. Mai had told her that she'd only help out until the position was filled.

Natsuki was also grateful for Youko, who assisted her in the day to day, taking Shizuru's place as Headmistress Deputy. Assisting in meetings, helping her make decisions regarding the school, and so on. Youko had done it in the past. Whenever Shizuru was out on long missions, she would help from time to time. She willingly, wordlessly took that role the moment Shizuru had gone missing two years ago.

Natsuki heard as her friend approached her, placing the tray on her desk.

"I know you're not hungry, but you should still eat, Natsuki" Mai replied, staring at the all too familiar document on the blunette's hands.

Mai knew that this was difficult for Natsuki, that it was a difficult choice. She knew that Natsuki still held hope that the brunette was still alive, since there was no body left behind to mourn or bury. No actual proof that she was dead.

All Natsuki found when she had gone to where Shizuru had last been spotted was her suitcase. There weren't any signs of battle or foul play. The place was totally deserted. Untouched. As if nothing had happened. As if no one had been there.

Natsuki had gone to that desert everyday for almost six months, trying to make some sense of the situation, of her disappearance. Haruka had even joined her in that search, and Shizuru's previous _Onee-sama_ , Ahn Lu, as well.

Plenty of people volunteered. Plenty of Otomes and experts alike, and found nothing. Nothing could explain where Shizuru was.

And so much time had passed since the brunette had gone missing. Every passing day diminishing the possibility of her return.

And this realization, it broke Natsuki's heart. She could literary hear it cracking to pieces every single night that the brunette wasn't around.

Every night, she'd silently cry into her pillow, asking her to return. Every night, she'd beg the higher powers to bring her back to her, that she'd do and give them anything they wanted. Every night she'd wish that, wherever Shizuru was, that she wasn't hurting, that she was safe.

"I know she meant-" Mai paused there, she didn't mean to say that word in the past tense. " _Means_ a lot to you" She said as she stared at the woman who wouldn't remove her eyes from the document. The woman, whose Emerald eyes were greener, shinier than ever, only because of the redness that surrounded it. Now that she was close enough, she could tell that she had been crying. "Just because you're making decisions about this, it doesn't mean that you have to lose hope. I don't want you to lose hope, Natsuki"

Mai didn't think Natsuki could survive another year, not without that four-lettered word. Hope is what's keeping her alive right now. The hope that she'd see the brunette again someday. Mai was certain of it.

Natsuki pursed her lips and nodded in understanding. She placed the document upside down on the desk, not wanting to look at it anymore. At least not for now.

She then stood and faced the window again, stared out into the vastness again. "By permanently replacing her, I feel like I'm giving up on her" Natsuki softly said. "When she returns, I don't want her to think that I gave up on her" And then, after a few seconds of silence, she whispered, "I know she's out there somewhere. I just know it, Mai… Someone can't just disappear, just like that"

That last part, Mai could understand. The world, the universe, was a magical, uncertain, and vast place with many mysteries. She herself had been stuck in a magical land for many years, unable to communicate with the outside world. She just hoped that wherever Shizuru was, if she was still in fact alive, that at least she was unharmed. Mai herself had been lucky to fall into the hands of the sweet demon, Mikoto. She just hoped that Shizuru was as lucky as her, if that were the case.

 **Same Time,**

 **Unknown Location**

"It's such a shame we have to send her back, she's far too precious…" A young man said as he touched the large, transparent, glassed capsule filled with cold water. There was a sleeping, naked brunette floating inside of it. "Can't we just keep her, father? Please?"

The older of the two occupants in the room sighed. He walked closer to the capsule, joining the young man. "We've got bigger plans for her, my boy" He said. In his hands, he carried a box, and inside that box, was the brunette's Gemstone.

"Oh, we're sending her back today?" The young man asked in both, disappointment and surprise, noticing the box in his father's hands.

"Yes, she's ready" The man then pushed a couple of buttons on the side of the capsule, this action that caused the water inside of it start to slowly flush.

"Do we have to send the Gemstone back as well? We don't know much about it yet" Then, added, "Besides the transformation and it's healing capabilities"

Yes, when they had first captured the wondering brunette, they found that she healed rather quickly when they tortured her. It took them a while to realize that it was the Gemstone, along with those curious particles they found in her blood, that did this, that was healing her so quickly.

They knew some things about it, about its power, but very little. They didn't think healing was one of its capabilities as well.

When they removed the Gem from her ear, when they had done the Blood Wash, their torture tactics, little by little, started to work. They didn't get one word out of the brunette though. Not a single one.

She just stared at them.

Stared.

That's all she ever did.

Now, the mysterious brunette's mind was a different story. She wasn't weak minded, like the others they had captured in the past.

Those whom they had captured in the past were simple commoners, vagabonds, they were the ones who had told them about people like the brunette. People, _warriors_ with such immense power.

They had tried brainwashing the brunette for a few months, but it didn't quite work. They had tried persuasion, but it didn't work on her either.

No. Not on her.

She was too clever, and her mind was too strong.

So, they resulted to other tactics since they were wasting too much time. They resulted to completely erasing, completely clearing her mind. All memories, her very essence, her intellect, gone. This was the only way their plan would work. The only way they could take over when darkness fell.

"This Gemstone is worthless without _the source_ , my boy. There's something in her bloodstream that enables her to use it" The man reminded, pushing another button that would open the capsule. "In order to obtain the Gem's full power, we need the particles and the source. The source is what helps her transform" Then, he explained, "And if we don't return the stone with her, they won't find her on time. I believe this Gem is also a tracking device... Without it, she'd probably die in that desert in a matter of days in her current state"

The young man understood, then asked, "Once it's back on her ear, won't it heal her mind though?" It was a possibility, it healed her wounds, and her mind was now wounded as well.

"I believe so, but only if they inject the curious particles again..." The had removed most of them already to examine them, "That's why time is of the essence. We need to act quickly before she recovers all her memories" He walked over to the wet, laying brunette. "We'll let her rest for a few days, not to cause any suspicions. Then, we'll go in"

He stared at her naked body for a moment, stared at her beautiful face, now realizing that his son was right. She was far too beautiful, far too precious, it would be crazy to let her go.

All this time, he had been focused on one particular thing about her.

Her fiery eyes.

When she had awoken the night that they had captured her, her demeanor seemed calm. Even when they tortured her, her demeanor seemed calm.

Yes, calm.

But her eyes, those Ruby eyes of hers told a different story. Told him that the moment she was free from his chains, that she would end him with her bare hands. That she would wrap her hands around his petty little neck and would squeeze so hard, so hard and would not let go, not until he was lying dead on the floor.

Those Ruby eyes haunted his dreams for many months, they still did to this day.

The man kneeled next to the naked woman, removing the breathing device from her nose and mouth. He went ahead and placed the purple Gem back on her left ear. Then, he leaned closer to her, and he couldn't help himself, just couldn't help it. He went ahead and placed a kiss on her cold, yet soft lips.

"Deadly beautiful" He whispered against her lips, using the name his son had given her. Then, after a moment, he whispered in her ear: "In the darkness, find the source"

"Shall I get her things, father?" The young man interrupted.

"Yes, get her dressed and prepare the portal" He told his son as he rose, "She's going home"

 **Two Hours Later,**

 **Garderobe**

\- Knock -

\- Knock -

"Um… Kruger-san? Are you there?" Arika called as she knocked on Shizuru's door, having a feeling that she'd find the _Gakuenchou_ there.

She had her heavy books in hand. Since Shizuru disappeared, the Headmistress had taken the responsibility of personally tutoring her. Arika wasn't sure if it was because she wanted to keep herself busy, or if it was because it was a way for her to feel closer to Shizuru, since Shizuru always helped her. Either way, she was glad for the help, although her grades weren't really improving. The way the Headmistress explained things just wasn't her cup of tea. It made her more confused sometimes.

"I-I'll be right there!"

She heard the woman shout, and then heard some shuffling and noise coming from inside the room. A few seconds later, the woman was at the door.

"A-Ah, is it that time already?" Natsuki nervously asked, a hand on the back of her head. She couldn't believe she had been caught in this room again, she meant to leave a little earlier.

"Yeah, but we can do this at another time. I'm not in a rush" Arika voiced, noticing the hint of pink on the Headmistress's nose.

" _Ie, ie_ , don't be silly. Let's go to the library" The blunette definitely welcomed the distraction. "So, did you get your test results yet? Was Miss Maria impressed?"

"Well…" Arika didn't know how to break it to her. She had a very low score again. She wished all she had to do was fight, she was really good at fighting.

Studies?

Chemistry, History, Math?

Not so much.

"Did it at least raise a little?" Natsuki asked as she eyed the girl, an eyebrow raising. They had worked really hard the past few weeks, she wondered if she was doing something wrong.

"Well…"

Natsuki sighed, it wasn't her or the way she taught, this girl was just a lost cause.

"It's not my fault I don't understand chemistry or math" The student couldn't help and complaint. "What do we need these things for anyway? I don't see any Otomes doing chemistry or math"

Natsuki was about to explain to the teenager why it was important to be a well-rounded Otome, why it was important to know all these things, but was interrupted by Youko's voice.

" _Natsuki. I need you to hurry to I.T., it's important"_

"Okay" Natsuki said, her hand was touching her blue Gem.

"Arika, can you study on your own tonight? Something has come up" She apologized to the teenager.

She watched as Arika nodded and walked away. "She's a lost cause anyway" She couldn't help and mutter, scratching the side of her head.

Between the walk and the elevator ride, getting to I.T. took approximately fifteen minutes from her current position.

When she arrived, she calmly walked to Youko's side. Nao was there as well, standing next to Youko with both arms resting behind her head.

"What took you so long?" Nao snickered.

"I'm the _Gakuenchou_ , I'm very busy" Natsuki narrowed her eyes at the insolent Column. "You don't seem so busy though, should I send you off somewhere for a couple of months?" She warned, "Somewhere cold?" Which caused Nao to humph and shut up.

Natsuki then turned her attention to Youko, "Is something wrong?" She asked, her arms folding below her chest as she looked at the massive screen ahead of them.

"I'm getting some strange readings" Youko answered, Indigo eyes never leaving the screen. Then, after a few moments, "I've- I've seen this before" She whispered with furrowed brows, and rapidly typed a few things on the keyboard. Then, she pushed a few buttons here and there. She brought up the readings she had recorded a couple of years ago, the morning Shizuru had gone missing.

The Chief of Technology looked at the readings intently for a few moments, eyes scanning all the similarities between the two. Eyes comparing each tremor, each wave, each line side by side.

"I-It's back" She whispered, then hit a few more buttons on the keyboard. By the readings she was receiving, by how rapidly its power was increasing, in just a matter of seconds something should happen.

And it did.

\- Beep -

Natsuki's hands slightly twitched when hearing the beep, when seeing the information now displaying on the screen.

She took a step back, her hands slowly unfolding themselves from the current hold they had below her chest.

"I-Is that?" Her eyebrows furrowed, and her lips trembled, her mouth slightly agape.

On the screen, the Bewitching Smile Amethyst Gem had suddenly appeared. And with it, one by one, all of Shizuru's vital signs. It was constantly updating, her heart beat, her breathing, amongst other things. Her location showed up on the screen as well.

"Y-You're seeing what I'm seeing, right?" The Headmistress couldn't help and ask, trying to make sure it wasn't some sort of illusion that had presented itself in front of her eyes. "Right?!" She said, louder this time. Then, looked at the two other women standing next to her, they seemed as surprised as her. They were in shock.

Natsuki quickly started for the door. She knew the location well, it was the same as before.

"Natsuki, wait!" Youko shouted after her. "We need more information! Wait!"

But Natsuki couldn't wait. She couldn't.

"Natsuki!"

Not even for Nao who was shouting behind her, who was running after her, asking her to wait for her. But Natsuki ignored her, waiting would only slow her down.

Natsuki quickly Materialized into her Robe as she ran, and once she was out in the open she immediately jumped into the air, flying as fast as she could. Flying as fast as the Robe would allow her to.

"Let it be real. Please... Please, please, let it be real" She chanted, whispered over and over.

She ignored the voice in her Gem. Youko's voice that warned her to be careful, that it might be a trap, to please come back. But Natsuki ignored her, she'd willingly fall for any trap as long as it led her to Shizuru.

It took her fifteen minutes to arrive at the desert. That damned desert that took Shizuru away from her. She suddenly came to a quick stop. It was dark, obscure, and although the moon was shining bright, she couldn't see a thing. The moonlight was not bright enough to distinguish person from sand.

"Shizuru!" She shouted from the top of her lungs, hoping to hear a reply, but only heard her own echo.

She quickly looked around, trying not to panic. She was trying to calm the fast beating of her heart so that she could focus, so that she could think clearly. That's when she suddenly spotted something black. It was slightly covered in sand not too far away.

She quickly made her way towards it. She could now hear Nao nearing her,

"Natsuki!"

She was behind her, shouting her name.

"Shizuru!" Natsuki shouted again once her feet had touch the sand. She ran the short distance towards her and collapsed on her knees once she was next to her. She recognized the clothing, what Shizuru had been wearing the day she had gone missing. She remembers every detail of it as clear as day.

"S-Shizuru" She whispered to her as she rolled her over, now able to see her sleeping face. She leaned forward, leaned towards the laying, unresponsive form. She couldn't believe it was really her. That she was really here. That she was really back.

"S-Shizuru" Natsuki whimpered the name as she touched her face, her trembling hands caressing her beloved's unusually cold cheeks for a hot, summer night.

"I-I missed you so much, Shizuru" She whispered to her as she leaned forward, her nose now touching the brunette's pointy nose. She could feel her shallow breathing hitting her lips.

"I love you" And she brushed her trembling lips against hers. Just a small caress of lips, nothing more. "I-I love you so much" She was now sobbing. Saying the words she had been dying to have a chance to say to her since the moment she had gone. "I love you so, so much, Shizuru" And then rested her forehead against the brunette's, staying that way for a few seconds as she tried to calm herself.

"We... we should probably head back" Nao said from a distance as she watched the scene. She wished she could give the woman some privacy, she hadn't seen her like this before. This affected. Her voice just a moment ago, the words she had just said, it sounded so desperate, so raw. It broke her heart.

"Do you need help?" Nao then asked, a small blush still on her cheeks because of what she had just seen. Because of the intimate interaction between the two.

" _Ie_ " Natsuki replied as she kneeled and carefully picked up the unconscious brunette, carrying her in her arms. "I've got her" And she held on to her, resting her face against her chest, then slowly making her ascend.

It took them twice as long to arrive Garderobe since they were flying at a slow pace. The flight was silent, and felt extremely long.

When they arrived, Youko was already waiting for them outside the building.

They quickly headed for the Medical Building and tried to figure out what was wrong with Shizuru since she had yet to wake up.

Youko ran an excessive amount tests, but everything came back negative. Nothing seemed to be really wrong with the brunette. Her toxicology test did show a small amount of some type of unknown sedative in her bloodstream, but it wasn't anything harmful. It should quickly wear off overnight. For now, the brunette just needed to rest.

"You should go to bed, Natsuki. I'll let you know when she wakes up" Youko suggested to the blunette who wouldn't move away from the medical bed. She was standing next to Shizuru, holding her hand.

" _Ie,_ I'm not leaving sights of her ever again" Natsuki softly told her. She'd wait forever if she had to. She'd never leave her side ever again.

Youko sighed in defeat, but couldn't help and smile. "Okay, let me know as soon as she wakes up" And decided to head back to I.T. to try and make some sense of today's readings, in hopes to figure out where the brunette had been all this time.

She also wanted to try and figure out what the sedative in her system was, it was nothing she'd ever seen or come across before.

And Natsuki?

All night long she stayed by Shizuru's side. She held her hand, kissed her head and whispered in her ear that she loved her, over and over and over again. And also thanked the higher powers for Shizuru's return.

 **\- 0 -**

* * *

 **Thanks for Reading!**

 **And thanks for the Reviews/ Comments**

 **"For the love of ShizNat"**


	3. Chapter 3

**In the Darkness**

 **A Mai Otome ShizNat Story**

 **Chapter 3**

Natsuki and Youko stared at Shizuru from a distance as they talked.

"What do you think is wrong with her?" Natsuki worriedly asked in a hushed voice, "Do you think it's permanent?" Her right hand was slightly squeezing her left upper arm, feeling a little anxious.

The brunette in question was still in bed. She was awake, sitting there with nothing but a white sheet wrapped around her naked body. Her Ruby eyes were curious, were all over the place. They were staring at everything, at anything that came her way. She seemed so confused, so fragile, so... _lost_.

When Shizuru opened her eyes this morning, she didn't recognize anyone, didn't know where she was or why she was there.

Then and there, Natsuki thought that the universe had a strange sense of humor, that the universe was playing some sort of prank on her. When she finally tells Shizuru that she loves her, when she tells her those words she had desperately wanted to hear two years ago, her mind was not there, it was completely blank. Shizuru had woken up and didn't recognize her. She had woken up with amnesia.

"I would have to examine her further to know for sure" Youko answered, both hands resting on her waist.

She watched as the brunette suddenly stood from the bed and started to slowly walk around the infirmary, her feet were bare. "An MRI, or perhaps a PET Scan might tell us what's wrong with her brain at a molecular level. But as far as how long she'll stay like this, if it's permanent, I'm not sure" Shizuru was also looking at posters and signs, touching things here and there on the desks. She sure was curious, which was understandable given her current state.

"Shizuru-san, please don't touch that" Youko then said to the wondering brunette. She was touching very expensive glass instruments. And if she dropped them, she could easily get hurt. Could easily get cut with the sharp, fine glass.

Youko then started to make her way towards her, letting out a deep sigh in the process. The brunette was as curious as a little child.

"Come sit, Shizuru-san" She patted at the bed and watched as the 29-year-old cautiously walked towards her. "Don't worry" She softly assured her. She truly smiled to let her know she will not cause her any harm. "I promise you, we're friends"

Shizuru went ahead and crawled back into bed.

"My name is... Shizuru?" Kyoto-ben spoke, sounding a little hoarse because she hadn't spoken in so many months.

Youko softly smiled. "Yes, your name is Viola, Shizuru. And you are an Otome of Garderobe" She then gave a few more details, hoping that perhaps it could trigger her memory. Ring a bell. "You are the Third Column, and one of the most powerful and beloved Otomes in the world" Then added, "You can call me Youko"

Shizuru weakly smiled, still confused. That was a lot of information to take in. "Youko-san says that I'm a… an Otome?" And then, "What is that?" She had so many questions. That sentence that the woman had said instantly creating three more.

One: What is Garderobe?

Two: What is a Third Column?

Three: Was she really one of the most powerful and beloved Otomes in the world?

Natsuki's right hand went up to her temple, gently massaging it as she heard the conversation from afar. She had so many questions of her own and she wasn't going to get answers to any of them any time soon, not in the brunette's current condition.

"Oh, she's finally awake" Nao noticed when she had stepped into the room. "You must be happy to be getting your freak-on with Shizuru-san tonight. I bet you can't wait" She snickered with a grin on her face and then gave a suggestive stare. And then, couldn't help and laugh when she saw Natsuki's blushing face.

"W-What are you doing here anyway? Don't you have somewhere else to be?" Natsuki hissed at the young Column, both arms now down on her sides, her hands turned into tight fists.

"No, I'm exactly where I need to be" Nao narrowed her eyes at the blunette, she just loved aggravating her. And now with Shizuru back, it's like old times again. Fun times.

"So, Shizuru-san" Youko continued with her questionnaire after she had explained to Shizuru a little bit about what an Otome is, and what it is that they do. "Can you please tell me what your last memory is?"

This peaked Natsuki's interest, so she listened carefully to the woman, ignoring Nao's comments.

"My last… memory?" Kyoto-ben slowly repeated.

"Yes" Youko replied.

"As in, before this morning? Before I woke up?"

Youko nodded again, "Yes. What's the last thing you recall, Shizuru-san?"

Ruby eyes left Youko's to stare at the two other figures standing not too far away. The two figures that were staring at her curiously, waiting for her to say something.

Ruby eyes then settled on Emerald ones, and she couldn't help the rush of blood that had suddenly gone straight to her head once their eyes connected. Couldn't help the incredibly fast pace of her beating heart.

Shizuru quickly looked down, all her fingers and thumbs holding tightly to the white sheet covering her naked body, holding the sheet closely around the bosom area.

She doesn't remember anything before waking up, not a thing, but she vividly remembers the moment after she had.

That woman, the one with the long, cobalt hair, the one with those piercing, green eyes, when she had woken up this morning, that woman had kissed her on the lips.

On the lips!

She still had been a little fuzzy from her sleep. And when she had opened her eyes, that woman had said something to her, had said:

" _Shizuru, I'm so glad you're awake. I missed you so much… I love you. Please don't disappear on me again"_

And before she could register what was happening, she felt that woman's warm hands caressing her face. She saw as she leaned downwards towards her and pressed her soft lips against hers.

She could still feel the tingly sensation on her lips right now, could still feel it just by thinking about it.

She had quickly pushed that woman off her, pushed so hard that the woman had fallen to the ground, her green eyes wide and mouth agape, just like her.

She couldn't believe this stranger had kissed her. Just couldn't believe it.

But now that she knows she has amnesia, that they knew each other, she just couldn't help and think,

Why?

Why would she do that?

Why would she kiss her like that?

What was she to her?

What were they to one another?

These were some of the questions floating around her head, creating so much noise all morning long.

"I don't remember anything" Shizuru quickly, uncharacteristically mumbled, unable to look up and meet the questioning stares.

Youko raised an inquisitive brow. She looked at Shizuru very carefully, noticing her behavior, her extremely and very unusually reddened cheeks. Then, eyes settled on Natsuki, who had a very strange, panicky look on her face. Who had cleared her throat and had looked away, a faint blush on her face as well. As if they knew something, as if something had happened very recently between them.

And Nao, on the other hand, couldn't help and smirk, easily reading the atmosphere in the room.

"Oh my, so the _Gakuenchou_ already tried getting frisky with Shizuru-san, eh?" She couldn't help and mutter near the blunette's ear.

"S-Shut up!" Natsuki nervously hissed at the Column. "I didn't know she didn't remember me!" Natsuki didn't mean to say that, not verbally.

The hysterical laugh produced by Nao's lips could probably be heard all over the Academy. " _Kami_ -sama, I can't, I just can't!" She let out between laughs. Natsuki had just admitted that she had been inappropriate with Shizuru. In what way? Who knows, and who cares? All that mattered was that she was having fun. "You should see your face!"

Youko sighed at the bantering women and once again paid attention to the brunette next to her.

"Shizuru-san?" She tried again, "I really need you to try and remember"

Shizuru hesitated. She really had tried to remember. She really did. She had been trying to all morning, but nothing came to her. It was aggravating. _Extremely_ aggravating.

And Natsuki, she ignored Nao and walked closer to Shizuru, noticing her frustration. She stopped when she was just an arm's length away.

"Shizuru" Natsuki softly said as she knelt in front of her. "Don't worry, it's okay" She went ahead and held both of her hands, softly caressing the woman's knuckles with her thumbs. "Anything you could tell us will be of big help. _Anything_. We're just trying to figure out what happened, where you have been all this time. You were gone for so long, Shizuru"

Ruby eyes looked into those caring, loving ones. She stared at them for a little while. She felt such a comfort, felt such an inexplicable warmth just by looking at her. By feeling Natsuki's hands caressing hers. So, she slowly gave in.

" _Hai_ , I'll give it another try" Then, she closed her eyes and tried to calm herself, calm her heart, her mind. After a few moments of deep inhaling and exhaling, she tried to search deep inside, her eyebrows furrowing slightly in the process.

Everything was blank, she didn't have any answers. She didn't remember where she had been. Didn't remember anything about her past. But, she did remember something, remembered a feeling.

"I… I remember coldness" Shizuru whispered, feeling a little uncomfortable, her hands subconsciously caressing the blunette's. "I remember… loneliness" And then, she added, "I-I… I remember darkness… whispers and shadows and... darkness"

She swallowed and then opened her Ruby eyes to stare at the frowning blunette. It seemed that the woman did that a lot, did a lot of frowning, a lot of worrying. That's when she brought her index finger to the bridge of her nose, gently tapping her there a few times. "Stranger-han's forehead is wrinkling again" She noticed, said aloud.

And Natsuki, she couldn't help and smile because of the gesture. "You're right, it is" Shizuru used to do that a lot, used to remind her not to worry in her own way. Shizuru's memories were still in there somewhere, Natsuki knew it, she could feel it. She knew that one of these days she'll remember again. That she'll recover her memories again. It's only a matter of time.

" _Kannin na_ , I don't seem to be of much help" The brunette then added, not for a moment leaving her stare of the woman's face. She found her beautiful, gorgeous, so alluring.

Natsuki softly smiled at her, "It's okay, Shizuru. Don't worry, you did great" She then reached up and caressed her face, forgetting that it wasn't just her and Shizuru in the room. "You'll remember soon, you'll see. It's all in there, I know it" This action that earned her another deep blush from her. That was the third one today.

"And I'm not a stranger" Natsuki softly added, hands touching the brunette's hands again. "My name is Kruger, Natsuki. You can call me Natsuki. I'm the Headmistress of this Academy"

Youko smiled as she stared at them talk, smiled at their interaction. She thought they were completely adorable. Too cute.

Too bad that adorableness would soon be interrupted by a frantic girl:

"Shizuru _Onee-sama_!" Arika yelled in excitement when she had reached the infirmary and saw the brunette was in fact there.

Rumors had been circulating around the Academy that Shizuru was back, that the Headmistress had found her the prior night, so she quickly headed towards the infirmary, knowing that's where she'd be.

"Shizuru _Onee-sama_!" Arika cried as she ran towards the brunette. She quickly shoved the Headmistress aside and jumped on the brunette, hugging her tightly. "I missed you so much Shizuru _Onee-sama_! So, so much!"

" _A-Ara_ ~" Shizuru let out in surprise, "Don't… Don't cry" She softly patted the girl on the head. "You're too pretty to cry, ne?" Then, when the teen smiled at her, she wiped her tears away. " _Fufu_ , you're so _Kawaii~_ " She caressed the teen's cheeks.

"Look at that, she's cheating on you right in front of you again" Nao took this opportunity to tease the Headmistress who just stood there with rosy cheeks and her mouth slightly agape. "And as usual, you're just going to let her do whatever she wants" She grinned at her. "She wears the pants in this relationship, uh?"

"W-What are you still doing here?!" Natsuki barked at her, aggravated. Then, stared at Arika who had yet to remove herself from the brunette, hugging her ever tighter now.

"Arika, why aren't you in class?" Natsuki tried to get their attention, but it didn't work. She then went ahead and grabbed Arika by the collar, pulling her away from Shizuru by the neck. "Give her some space, you're suffocating her" She muttered, slightly annoyed by their closeness. And also because the brunette seemed to be enjoying it.

" _Fufu_ , it's quite alright" Shizuru added with a genuine smile. "She's really sweet" Then, said to Arika, " _Kannin na_ to have worried you..." and then added, "I'm having a little trouble with my memory at the moment, may I ask your name?"

Natsuki watched as Shizuru patted on the teen's head again and then as she caressed her face while Arika excitedly talked to her. Emerald eyes waiting, waiting, and waiting. Waiting for Shizuru to look her direction, the way she normally did at around this time when she wanted to see her reaction. But that look, that stare, never came. Shizuru wasn't trying to tease her. Natsuki never thought she'd see the day that she'd missed her teasing.

Natsuki cleared her throat and looked away, taking a deep breath. Then, once she was calmer and the redness of her cheeks had somewhat gone, she softly suggested, "Arika, since you've decided not to go to class this morning, why don't you see Shizuru to her quarters?" When Arika nodded, she added, "Shizuru, you must be hungry, I'll pick you up in about an hour and we can have breakfast together, is that okay?"

Shizuru nodded in response as she stood from the bed.

"Arika, don't make any stops, take her straight there. Understood?" Natsuki then commanded the girl.

She wanted to hold an emergency assembly to let all the students and teachers know that Shizuru was back, but that she wasn't well. She wanted to update them on her condition so that they acted accordingly around her.

She also needed to get on the phone with the Council to let them know that Shizuru had returned. She wasn't sure how that phone call would go, since she has little information to give them regarding Shizuru's whereabouts. But, was sure they'd understand given her current condition. Anyway, whatever they thought didn't matter. Shizuru was an Otome of Garderobe. Her purpose was to serve the Founder and the school. Natsuki needn't give anyone explanations about Shizuru.

"May I have something more appropriate to wear?" Shizuru asked as she pointed to her current dress code.

"O-Oh, um, right" Natsuki then turned to Youko, and Youko stepped away for about thirty seconds. When she came back, she handed her a long, white robe and some slippers. "Really? That's all you have? Where are her clothes?"

"I'd like to keep them for a while if Shizuru-san doesn't mind" Youko replied, staring at both, Shizuru and then Natsuki. "I'd like to run some tests and see if there are any fragments or sediments on it that can tell us where Shizuru has been all this time"

Natsuki understood, then faced the brunette. "Alright, um" She swallowed and then cleared her throat, "Ahem" her cheeks reddening yet again. " _Gomen_ , this is all we have" She whispered as she stepped closer to Shizuru, totally invading her personal space.

She saw as Shizuru then turned around, and she soon had to face away, blushing like an idiot, for Shizuru had let go of the sheet that was wrapped around her naked body. She felt as the sheet fell on the floor, part of it landing on her feet. Then, felt as Shizuru slid her hand in one sleeve, then the other. She felt as the robe left her fingers, that's when she faced in front of her again. The brunette was now fully clothed in the robe, but hadn't turned around yet, she was still tying the knot around her waist.

" _Ookini_ " Shizuru turned around, smiling sweetly at Natsuki. A blush appeared on her cheeks when she came to the realization of how close they were standing. "I'll… See Natsuki in about an hour?" She then asked, taking a step closer, but to the side, now walking around her to meet Arika.

"Ah, yes… I'll stop by your quarters in an hour" And her Emerald eyes followed her form the entire time, not for one second leaving her sight.

"She's really cute, isn't she?" Youko commented as she watched the brunette go, her hands in her pockets.

"Yea…" Natsuki softly agreed, "N-No. Wait" But then gave up, "Just forget it" Then came the pout, and soon after, Nao's hysterical laugh followed.

Youko also laughed, but tried to explain what she had meant by that sentence, "I mean, the way she's acting. It's really cute" She had never seen Shizuru blush before, never. Calmness and pleasantness always grazed Shizuru's features, no matter the situation. The woman was always very hard to read, it was hard to surprise her, hard to get any kind of reaction out of her.

Natsuki definitely agreed, Shizuru was acting very cute, but she couldn't wait for her to be herself again. Couldn't wait for her memories to come back to her. She had so many things she wanted to tell her, to talk to her about, especially regarding their relationship.

She had taken so many things for granted before, and wanted to work on them, to make their relationship better, to take things a step further.

 **Later, That Night**

Shizuru was sitting on her long sofa chair by the window. She was loosely hugging her knees against her chest, and had a soft smile on her lips as she stared at the moon and the sea of stars above.

Today had been a long day, and she was very tired from all the walking and all the people that she'd met, plus all the tests she had to take.

But she also felt happy, specially because she thinks she remembered something just a few minutes ago.

Next to her on the sofa was her diary, her journal. She had stumbled upon it about an hour ago when she was going through her drawers. She had read the first four entries of the diary already, and while she was reading it, she could visualize everything that had happened in her head.

She wasn't sure if it was her imagination visualizing what she was reading, or if it was actual memories, but she would soon find out, she thought she would ask Natsuki when she stopped by to check in on her.

\- Knock -

\- Knock -

"Shizuru, may I come in?"

And as if on cue, there Natsuki was. It was her soft yet husky voice.

" _Hai_ , it's open" Shizuru shouted, not removing her stare from the sky.

Natsuki stepped in and closed the door behind her. Then, headed towards the brunette. She was already in her sleepwear, and was stopping by to wish Shizuru goodnight, and to see if she needed anything.

"All settled for bed?" Natsuki asked as she stood next to her, both of her hands in her robe's pockets. When Shizuru nodded, she continued, "Why do you always find that thing so interesting?" She couldn't help and ask as she looked up at the moon as well. Shizuru often stared at it, almost every night, she didn't know why.

"It's beautiful, isn't it?" Shizuru replied as she stared at the stary sky, "Doesn't it make you wonder where this beauty comes from? How did it get there?"

"No. Not really" Natsuki answered honestly. "I've never had the time to really think about it"

"Then Natsuki should make herself a little less busy and try to think a little more about the beauty that surrounds her"

Natsuki smiled. "I know... I should" Then replied, lovingly staring at the brunette.

After a long moment of silence, the brunette spoke. "Would you like to sit?" She motioned for the empty space in front of her, "I'd like to ask you something"

"Oh, okay" Natsuki raised a curious brow and went ahead and sat in front of her, sharing the long sofa chair with her. "What would you like to talk about?" She folded one leg over the other and waited for the brunette to speak.

"What's a Coral?" Shizuru asked after much thought, trying to remember the word.

"Corals are first and second year students" Natsuki explained, "After that, you become a Pearl. Pearls are upperclassmen... Why do you ask?"

"I was doing some light reading…" Shizuru then said, patting to the diary next to her.

"Ah, I see, so you've found your journal" Natsuki smiled. She remembers walking in on Shizuru a few times as she was writing on it. Shizuru had explained to her that she had started using it when she first enrolled Garderobe, just writing things here and there, things and feelings she didn't want to forget.

"I think I remembered something… Someone. But I need your help. I can't tell if it's a memory or if it's my imagination"

"Oh, alright. I wasn't in Garderobe when you were a first-year Coral, but I can try to help" Natsuki faced her direction, one leg fully resting on the sofa now, the other touching the ground. "What do you think you remember?"

"There's this girl. Her name is..." Shizuru couldn't remember her name, so her hand reached for the diary and went back to the first page of it. Ruby eyes scanned the page until she found the name. "Haruka-chan" She let out once she had found it, and then closed the diary again. "What does she look like?"

"Oh, Haruka-san… She was your roommate back then and number 2 Coral, you were the first" The blunette explained, but Shizuru seemed confused because of this, not knowing the terminology or ranks. "Um. She's got blondish hair, purple eyes, light skin. She's got very short bangs. And she's loud. Really loud... Obnoxiously loud" When Shizuru smiled wider, she couldn't help and smile herself.

That wide, playful smile, it could only mean that she remembers.

She actually remembers!

"Hold on, let me get something really quick" Natsuki excitedly said, "I'll be right back!" And quickly headed for her bedroom.

When she returned about a minute later, she had a picture in her hands. It was a picture of her Coral days. The six, top ranking Coral students were there, and so were the Trias, the top three Pearls. She sat down again and showed the picture to her.

"Is that her?" She asked the brunette.

" _Ara_ ~ That's her!" Shizuru confirmed, happy to have obtain some of her memory. It wasn't much, but at least it was something.

She went ahead and threw herself at the blunette, hugging her tightly, and then, after a moment, felt as the blunette hugged her back.

" _Fufu_ , Natsuki looks really cute in her uniform... And she looks so serious" Shizuru then added after they had parted from their embrace, Ruby eyes looking down at the picture again.

They were sitting next to each other now, arm touching arm, leg touching leg. Shizuru couldn't deny it, she liked being next to her, being this close to her. It was calming. Soothing.

"You see that? That's a Coral uniform" Natsuki excitedly told her, a small blush on her cheeks because of the brunette's comment. "When you become a Pearl, you wear the grey uniform" She then pointed out a few things in the picture, "You were the top-ranking Pearl in your class, that's why your uniform is lighter than the other two Pearls, see?" She pointed to the three uniforms. "It's a way to distinguish and celebrate the top Pearl's achievements"

" _Hai_ " Shizuru nodded, staring intently as the blunette talked. She was looking at her lips, those sweet lips, leaning closer. Her lips, her scent, her voice slowly pulling her in.

And then, she stopped and blinked a few times, unsure of why she was doing this. Why she was so drawn to her. She doesn't even know her.

Was she really just about to kiss her?

The brunette abruptly stood and placed some much needed distance between them, now leaning against the window.

And now that Shizuru was standing, Natsuki was able to see her outfit, what she was wearing to bed. Her eyebrows arched upwards and Emerald eyes slowly roamed the brunette's body from head to toe.

She was wearing a short, black, satin night gown, and was showing a lot of skin. A whole lot. Why wasn't she wearing the robe that came with it?

Natsuki brought a hand to her lips and cleared her throat, "Ahem" blushing and looking away, feeling excited, aroused just by looking at her. She absolutely loved that nightgown. She had gifted it to Shizuru on their first year anniversary.

"A-Alright, I, uh, I'm going to bed" Natsuki then stood, photograph in hand. She took a deep breath. "Have a good night, Shizuru... Sleep well" Then added, "And please don't stay up too late, you have an early morning tomorrow with Youko"

Shizuru frowned, "More tests?" she was hoping they were already done with that today. She was starting to feel like a science experiment. She didn't appreciate that.

"I know, I'm sorry…" The blunette noticed the expression and tone. "I'm not sure what she has planned for tomorrow. Maybe I can ask her to postpone it for a couple of days. Would you like that?"

" _Hai_ , that would be lovely" Shizuru smiled at this. "Can we have breakfast by the garden again? I really love it there, it's so peaceful" She asked as she walked her to the door. When Natsuki nodded, she said, " _Oyasumi_ , Natsuki. See you tomorrow"

"Good night, Shizuru. Sleep well" Natsuki gave a small wave and then watched as Shizuru did the same. Then, watched as she closed the door.

"Haruka-san of all people" Natsuki couldn't help and happily mutter as she walked the short distance to her bedroom. Thinking that Haruka must've made a hell of a first impression if Shizuru remembered her. "Looks like that journal will be of some use after all"

And Natsuki hoped that Shizuru would fully obtain her memories before she got to the part when she was a Pearl. That's the year they had met, and there were a lot of embarrassing memories then. She didn't want to have to relive them again, knowing the brunette would probably ask her many questions about that time.

 **\- 0 -**

* * *

 **Thanks for Reading!**

 **And thanks for the reviews/ Comments**

 **"For the love of ShizNat"**


	4. Chapter 4

_**Author's Note:** For this chapter, It would help if you knew the melody to Heart and Soul_

 **In the Darkness**

 **A Mai Otome ShizNat Story**

 **Chapter 4**

 **Approximately Two Weeks Later**

It was early afternoon, and Shizuru lay on Natsuki's grey couch in fetal position, deep asleep.

Her head was resting on her left arm, using it as a pillow. Her right hand was resting on her opened diary, her fingers loosely holding onto a yellow sharpie.

She had been reading it, and at some point, had fallen asleep. She was using the sharpie to highlight words or things she wanted to know more about, things she would ask Natsuki about when they spent some alone time together.

Natsuki had been very busy the past couple of days, so they mostly saw one another during lunchtime and at night, right around bedtime. Natsuki would always stop by her room to bid her goodnight and they would chat for a very long while.

It had been a little over two weeks since she had returned to Garderobe, and unfortunately, hadn't had much progress on the memory front. Things did come to her randomly here and there, spontaneously. Take yesterday as an example, Arika had given her a long, tight hug, and that seemed to have triggered something within her. She remembered a time when she had hugged the teen, had whispered the word "Materialize", and the girl had transformed into a Coral Robe.

When she had asked Arika about it, about that memory, about that vision that had suddenly come to her, Arika explained that that was the day she had a Dance or a Duel with Nina, the Dance that would decide her enrollment in Garderobe. She explained to her that she had used her Gem to power up her Coral Robe.

Little by little things did come to her, just not as fast as Shizuru would've hoped. It was aggravating. She felt so useless. She had nothing to do. All she did was just walk around Garderobe, sleep, eat, read, rest. She did a lot of the last one as of late, a lot of resting, yet she felt extremely tired recently and didn't know why. She always ended up having to take a nap after lunch since her body seemed to want it, to need it. She always dozed off while reading without realizing.

She was also a little confused about some of her recent memories and wasn't sure how she felt about them. She wasn't sure if they were actual memories or if she was just daydreaming, fantasizing.

These memories, these dreams, were too embarrassing to ask Natuki about. A little inappropriate, actually. Lately, she had been dreaming about them kissing, whispering things in each other's ears. She had been dreaming about long, passionate nights with her hands entangled in Natsuki's hair, whispering to her that she loves her. Dreaming about Natsuki's hands touching her naked body, about Natsuki making love to her.

She thought that perhaps, this was just a product of them spending a lot of time together. Ever since she awoke that morning, since she had come back, they had been nearly inseparable. She was sure that if they had shared an intimate past, if they had been in a relationship, that Natsuki would've said so by now, would've told her by now.

When she had discretely asked Youko about it the other day, when she had brought it up, the woman had given her a very vague answer, and told her to talk to Natsuki. So, she didn't know what to think. And she didn't feel comfortable enough asking anyone else about this, she only felt comfortable enough discussing it with Youko. She didn't want to ask Natsuki and make things awkward with her. The topic was a little delicate.

"I had a feeling I'd find you here" Natsuki thought aloud once she had stepped into her study, gently closing the door behind her.

Earlier, while they were having lunch together, Shizuru had mentioned to her that she felt a little tired and would take a nap after lunch.

Natsuki had taken a break from her duties and had stopped by the brunette's bedroom to see if she was feeling okay. She had knocked on her door a few times, and when she didn't hear a response she went right in, but the brunette wasn't there.

In the past, before Shizuru had gone missing, the brunette would either nap in her bedroom, or in Natsuki's study. So, when the blunette didn't find her there she thought she'd try the study, having a feeling that's where she would be.

And her feeling was right. There, in her study, Shizuru was. Old habits never died, amnesia or not.

Natsuki walked over to the sleeping brunette and knelt in front of her. Her Emerald eyes glanced at the journal and noticed the date. It seemed like Shizuru was already reading about her Pearl days, at around the time after they had first met.

Natsuki then went ahead and softly caressed her cheek with her fingertips. And soon after, she leaned closer and placed a soft kiss there, a ghost of a kiss. She lingered there for a little while, her nose lightly touching the brunette's pointy nose, wishing she could kiss her lips, wishing she could lean in that very short distance and feel them again. Missing them. But after gathering much willpower she decided against it and placed some distance between them.

She let out a deep breath and headed for her bookshelf. Then, grabbed the book she had recently started reading and headed back to the couch. Once there, she removed her jacket and neatly placed it on the arm rest, then, gently sat next to the sleeping woman.

She didn't have the heart to wake her, it seemed like she really needed the rest. So, she just waited for her to wake up on her own.

"Nn..."

About twenty minutes later, Natsuki heard the brunette softly groan. She left her eyes off the book and stared as she stretched, it seemed like she was now awake. And due to their closeness, Shizuru's feet lightly bumped, lightly hit her thigh.

 _"Ara?_ " Shizuru let out in surprise once she saw the blunette on the opposite end of the couch. She thought she was the only one in the room.

" _Kannin na_ " Then apologized to her as she rose to a sitting position and continued with her much needed stretch.

"I see you have found my study" Natsuki softly smiled at her, closing her book. She leaned forward and placed it on the coffee table, then crossed one leg over the other once her back was once again resting against the couch.

"This is Natsuki's study?"

" _Hai_ " And before she could add more to that response, the brunette once again apologized.

" _Kannin na,_ I didn't mean to intrude-"

" _Ie_ , don't worry about it, you're not intruding" Natsuki quickly replied to her, "You used to spend a lot of time here as well, especially on that thing over there" She motioned to the piano.

"I see…" Shizuru tried to remember how she even got there in the first place but couldn't find an explanation. Now that she thought about it, this was her very first time in this room. Natsuki hadn't shown her this room before.

"I think my feet just brought me here" She softly said after much thought.

Natsuki smiled even wider when hearing this. They were baby steps, but she was getting there. Slowly but surely. "That's a good sign, don't you think?"

And Shizuru smiled widely as well, Natsuki's smile was purely contagious. " _Hai_ , I suppose it is"

They stared at one another in silence for a long while. And for a moment, it felt like they were trying to figure out what the other was thinking. Smiles slowly disappearing as the clock kept ticking.

"A-Ahem" Natsuki nervously cleared her throat and looked away, ending their staring contest. That look that Shizuru was giving her, it was a little intense. Too intense. "Would you like to give it a try?" She then asked, motioning for the piano again. "Maybe it'll come naturally, you were pretty good"

" _Fufu_ , I don't think so" Shizuru giggled her reply, a hand covering her lips. There was no way she was going to make a fool of herself. "Does Natsuki play the piano?"

"Well…" Natsuki scratched the back of her neck, "not quite. You did teach me how to play one song though, but it's been a while since I've played it"

" _Hontoni_? I taught Natsuki how to play a song?" Shizuru crawled closer to the blunette, eyebrows arching in interest.

"Um... _Hai?_ " Natsuki distractedly said as her eyebrows arched upwards and looked down at her hands. Shizuru was now holding them, intertwining their fingers together. And now, she was standing, dragging her towards the white piano with a huge, playful smile on her face.

"Wait, you want me to play the song? Right now? I just told you I haven't played in a while"

" _Ara_ ~ But Natsuki can play~" Kyoto-ben said in a sing-song way as she guided Natsuki to the long, white, piano bench.

Her hands rested on Natsuki's shoulders once they had arrived there and willed her to sit. "Play it for me, please?" She said as she bent and wrapped her arms around Natsuki's neck from behind, cheek touching warm cheek. "Please, Natsuki?"

And Natsuki?

"A-Ah…" She couldn't help and swallow the lump that had formed in her throat. Not because of the song that she had to play, but because of Shizuru's closeness, because of how she was hugging her. It was like old times again.

"Okay" She finally said, and when the brunette was about to walk away, she quickly grabbed her hand, adding, "But you have to help me"

When the brunette gave her a quizzical stare. One that said, ' _In what way? I can't remember a thing, or did Natsuki forget?_ ' the blunette added, "It's not difficult, you'll see"

"Nn, alright" Shizuru reluctantly gave in.

"Great" Natsuki slid over to the right, motioning Shizuru to sit on her left side. "Okay..." Natsuki then started to explain once the brunette was sitting next to her, "You'll be my left hand, so keep the right hand on your lap, okay?"

" _Hai_ "

"Shizuru, that's my lap"

" _Fufu_ , oops. It is, isn't it?" She gave it a tight squeeze.

"S-Shizuru!"

" _Hai, hai, kannin na,_ no more games" Her hands went up in the air, a sign of surrender, "I promise" and then added, "Please continue"

Natsuki sighed, then went ahead and grabbed the brunette's left hand. She wrapped her hand around it until it was loosely fisted, then positioned her index finger. "This is the only finger you'll need" She whispered as she guided her hand towards the keys.

All the while, Shizuru tried to focus on her breathing. Her heart had started thumping furiously against her chest the moment Natsuki had leaned over and grabbed her hand. Their faces were so close. Her lips were so close. It was like if she was in one of her fantasies again. She couldn't help it, the fast beat of her heart. She couldn't help it, it was something she couldn't control.

Could she will her heart to stop?

"This song is called Heart and Soul. We're just going to play the simple version of it since you don't remember it" Natsuki said to her as she glanced her way. That's when she noticed the faint blush on the woman's cheeks, the way she was biting her lower lip.

Natsuki swallowed yet again and tried to distract her mind, to not read into things. "U-Um... So, your part is very easy. All you have to do is hit four keys repeatedly" She continued, Emerald eyes now on the keys. She guided the brunette's finger to the four keys, stroking them as she went, producing a low sound. "See? Just like that" She did it again but at her desired pace, just a little faster. "Try to keep it at that pace, okay?"

" _H-Hai_ " Shizuru said, letting out a trembling breath once Natsuki's hand was no longer covering hers.

"Okay. So, you will start, and then I'll join you" The blunette instructed, "And don't stop until I tell you" then softly added.

" _Hai_ "

"You can start whenever you're ready"

And Shizuru did. She took a couple of deep breaths and then, she did.

Her fingers gently stroked the keys. She played the four keys repeatedly about two times, that's when she saw Natsuki's hand joining hers in playing, when she heard the sweet melody.

And suddenly, mid-song, Shizuru let out a small gasp, her hand temporarily halting. Something had suddenly come to her, it was a memory.

"What's wrong? Did you get lost?" Natsuki stopped her movements as well. "It can be a little confusing repeating the keys over and over. I used to get confused all the time"

Shizuru glanced over at Natsuki. "When did I teach Natsuki how to play this song?"

And Natsuki didn't have to think about it, not for a second. "After you had become a Column" She said, "It was right before-"

"I went away on my first mission?" Shizuru finished the sentence for her.

"You remember" Natsuki widely smiled, showing perfect, white teeth.

"Can we start again? I think I can remember the lyrics to this song" Kyoto-ben excitedly let out.

"There's actual lyrics?" Natsuki couldn't help and ask, surprised. "Like, actual lyrics? Actual words?" She really didn't know, Shizuru never mentioned it before. Never said a word about it. She had heard her humming something before, but never said the actual words.

" _Hai_ " And then, Shizuru started playing again, and when Natsuki joined her, she voiced the words along with Natsuki's every stroke of the key. She wasn't singing, just softly saying the words.

"Heart and soul, I fell in love with you"

"Heart and soul, the way a fool would do, madly"

"Because you held me tight"

"And stole a kiss in the night"

"Heart and soul, I begged to be adored"

"Lost control, and tumbled overboard, gladly"

"That magic night we kissed"

"There in the moon mist"

"But your lips were thrilling, much too thrilling"

"Never before were mine so strangely willing"

"But now I see, what one embrace can do"

"Look at me, it's got me loving you, madly"

"That little kiss you stole"

"Held all my heart and soul"

Natsuki watched as Shizuru voiced the words the whole time, not needing to face the piano to play the song. It was forever memorized in her mind, in her hands. She could play it with her eyes closed.

"It's beautiful, isn't it?" Shizuru faced the quiet, staring blunette once they had finished playing the song, both of her hands now resting on her lap.

And Natsuki could only slowly nod in response. And wondered why Shizuru had specifically taught her that song. Wondered when exactly had Shizuru fallen in love with her, and if Shizuru knew that she held feelings for her before she, herself, had realized it.

She didn't realize she held feelings for the brunette until way later, until she was gone. Shizuru's first mission as a Column had taken so long. She had been away for almost four months! And they didn't act upon their feelings until years later. They became a couple about five years after Natsuki had become a Column.

Shizuru stared at the quiet blunette in the eyes for a long moment. It's like the woman wanted to say something, to ask something, but was debating.

She then noticed the tear that had started to make a trail down her left cheek, and she instantly reached for it, gently wiping it away.

And what she did after that was somewhat automatic, it was pure instinct. She went ahead and leaned forward, she closed her Ruby eyes, and brushed her lips so tenderly against the blunette's trembling ones. She felt as the blunette reciprocated to the kiss in an instant, touching her cheek as well.

Shizuru did exactly as in her dreams. She caressed her cheeks as she slowly kissed her, then tangled those long fingers of hers in her soft, cobalt mane, resting her hand between her ear and neck before parting their lips.

She lingered there for a few seconds, her eyes closed, noses touching, breathing, breathing, breathing... and went in for a second brush of lips. And then, she whispered "I love you, Natsuki" to her once their lips had parted that second time. Just as she did in every single one of her dreams. Just as she did in her fantasies.

But when she opened her eyes again and realized what she had done, she had to blink a few times, _"A-Ara!"_ She abruptly stood and placed some distance between them, somewhat in shock.

" _Kannin na_ , Natsuki, I-I don't know why I did that" Her face was red, extremely red, totally embarrassed. " _Kannin na_ " She said as she took another step back. "This is so embarrassing, _kannin na_ " She was about to head out the door, to go back to her quarters,

"Shi- Shizuru, wait!"

But Natsuki stopped her by quickly grabbing her by the arm, preventing her from leaving.

 _"Shi- Shizuru, wait"_

 _"I'll figure things out, I promise"_

Shizuru slowly turned around to face the blunette, remnants of a broken memory suddenly coming to her. Her Ruby eyes were glistening because of the unshed tears they held. She was so embarrassed. So, so embarrassed. And now, with this new memory, _unfinished_ memory, she was more and more confused.

"It's okay, Shizuru, don't be embarrassed" The Headmistress then said, not wanting her to leave feeling that way. "Sometimes we just act on impulse, without thinking…" She tried to explain her behavior. "We- We got caught up in the moment. That's all"

Shizuru looked at Natsuki straight in the eyes after she had said this. She wanted to ask her, then and there, if that was the reason she had kissed her that morning two weeks ago, because she was acting without thinking. Or if there was more to it. She wanted to ask her if they were more than just friends, but couldn't form the words.

Everything, dream and reality, seemed to be mashing up together in her head. She didn't know what to believe. What was real.

"Listen, don't worry about it" Natsuki then caressed the brunette's hand, giving it a little tug afterward to reassure her of this. "It's already forgotten, okay?"

Natsuki wished she would've told the brunette from the beginning that they were in a relationship before the brunette had gone missing. But she kept it to herself, mainly because she didn't want Shizuru to feel uncomfortable around her since she couldn't return her feelings. She didn't want her to feel any pressure, and didn't want Shizuru to see how hard her memory loss was on her. How much she was missing her partner, her lover, her best friend. But most of all, definitely didn't want her to see her heartache. It was already hard enough just being around her like this. All their memories forgotten.

And she also wanted Shizuru to trust her, to be able to confide in her. There was no way she'd be able to if she knew how she felt. Wouldn't be able to talk to her as freely as she does now.

"Okay" Shizuru then looked away, unable to look at Natsuki in the eyes, and placed some distance between them.

She went back to the couch to grab her diary, and decided that perhaps it was time she returned to her quarters. She couldn't help and feel both, disappointment and relief by the blunette's words.

And she was so confused, so confused about her own feelings. She didn't know if this was new, something she had recently developed, or if this was something she felt prior to her amnesia.

" _Etto_ , Shizuru" Natsuki let out as she watched mentioned woman grab her things, "Tomorrow, why don't we go out somewhere, would you like that?"

She realized this morning that Shizuru had yet to leave the confines of the Academy. She had been stuck in Garderobe the past two weeks, the brunette seemed so bored most of the time.

When Shizuru's face seemed to light up because of this, she added, "I also wanted to run something by you…" She went ahead and sat on the couch, motioning for Shizuru to do the same. When the brunette did, she kept on, "Miss Maria and I have been talking, and we think it'll be good for you to attend some classes. What do you think? Is that something you'd like to try?"

"That would be nice, at least I'll be busy… I'm extremely bored"

Natsuki smiled at this, "That's what I thought"

"Wouldn't it be strange though?" She would be the only adult in the room, besides the teacher, of course. But the teacher would be teaching, she, on the other hand, would be studying. "And I wouldn't want to disrupt the class"

" _Ie_ , the students know your situation…"

Shizuru was relieved because of this.

"And you don't have to interact with anyone if you don't want to, just sit in the back and listen to the lectures. I'll join you in some of them, depending on my schedule" Natsuki then added, "This will be good for you, it might help you better understand whatever you wrote in your journal"

Shizuru liked that idea. She couldn't understand any of the terminology, it was getting a little frustrating, and very confusing.

And speaking of the journal and terminology, "Natsuki, you were my Room Attendant, correct?"

Natsuki gulped, blushing lightly, "Yes… Why do you ask?" She timidly let out.

"Since I will be a student again, does that mean that she gets to Attend me again? Call me _Onee-sama?_ "

"What? No, _baka_!" Natsuki blushed and yelled at her, and Shizuru could only giggle in response.

The things she had to endure while she was Shizuru's Room Attendant, it was unbelievable.

All the teasing and inappropriateness. Shizuru just loved to make her blush, to make her feel totally uncomfortable, especially during bath time. But she couldn't deny it, being her Room Attendant did make them closer, and she did learn a lot from the Pearl. Natsuki thought she was a good Otome because of her teachings, because of her guidance.

"I found something that may bring Natsuki a little consolation" Shizuru then said after her fit of giggles had subsided, "May I?" then motioned for the diary, asking if she could read her something.

"I'm all ears"

Shizuru opened her diary and searched for the desired page. Then, she started reading aloud one of her entries from when she was a Pearl:

"Today I met the most fascinating creature. I've seen her around campus before, she seems to be very timid and mostly keeps to herself. So, imagine my surprise when she came up to me this morning and petitioned to be my Room Attendant" Ruby eyes looked up to meet Emeralds, who seemed to blush, knowing this entry was about her.

"I honestly thought of her as one of my many fangirls. This girl was cute, very cute, so I thought I'd give her what she was looking for, a little affection. But what happened next, not in a million years I could've foreseen. I could've never foreseen the disappointment in her beautiful green eyes, the horror because of what I did to her" Shizuru turned over the page, then kept on reading in soft Kyoto-ben.

"Because I stole a kiss from her. She told me to forget about her petition, that it was a mistake, that I was not whom she thought I was, and that I was the biggest disappointment. And even at this late hour, although it has been many hours since, I still feel the burning sensation on my cheek, and I still can hear the ringing in my ears. This Coral, Kruger, Natsuki, has left quite an impression on me. No one has ever laid a finger on my face and has walked away without a single scratch. I will apologize to her, and if she still wants to be my Room Attendant and learn from me, I will gladly accept. I think she will become a great Otome one day. I have a lot of knowledge and skills to offer, she'd be a fool not to let this little incident slide. This girl is very interesting, I hope we become great friends"

Once Shizuru finished reading the entry, she closed the diary, it was now resting on her lap. "So, Natsuki slapped me?"

" _Hai_ , you deserved it" Natsuki muttered while folding her arms over her chest. "I'm glad it stung all night long"

"And I stole a kiss from Natsuki?" Shizuru then added with a raised brow, totally amused. "Was this Natsuki's first kiss?" And when the blunette stiffened, her face burning, " _Ara~_ I hope it was good at least..." and added, "I have a feeling I'm a great kisser. If Natsuki doesn't approve we can do a do over"

"..." Not a word from the blunette. Not a single one.

" _Fufu_ , I wasn't that bad of an _Onee-sama_ , was I?" Shizuru then continued teasing her, changing the subject a little.

"N-Not that bad? Not that bad?! You were intolerable, insufferable, a complete embarrassment and pain. I still don't understand how I survived that year. It's beyond me" Natsuki replied, but there was no malice in her words, and she didn't sound upset at all. That smile of hers said it all, showed her exaggeration.

"I know, I have read" There was a playful smile on Shizuru's face, which made Natsuki's face reddened even more. Just what exactly did she write in there?

The things Shizuru had read in that diary, she would've not believed were it not in her own handwriting. During her Coral years, she had been quite a promiscuous butterfly. She flirted with almost everyone she thought was pretty, and apparently having Ahn Lu as an _Onee-sama_ didn't help. She encouraged it even more, and taught her a few things about teasing and seduction.

But she noticed that something seemed to have changed during her Pearl year. The few entries she had read so far suggested so. And her writing, her sentences, they were a little hard for her to decipher. It was as if she was writing in code at the time. Or maybe trying to hide something, but what?

Natsuki stood from the couch and grabbed her blue jacket. She had been there too long and had to get back to her office. She had a lot of documents to review, and a couple of phone calls to make.

"I've got to go..." Natsuki said, a little disappointed. She would've liked to stay with Shizuru a little longer. "I still have some things to take care of upstairs" Then, she suddenly remembered. "Oh, Shizuru, I was going to ask you if you were feeling okay. You seemed a little down during lunch"

Shizuru stood from the couch, sharpie and diary in hand. "I'm alright, I just feel like something is draining my energy sometimes. I sleep enough and rest enough, I'm not sure where all that energy goes"

She followed Natsuki out the door and started asking her questions about the city and where they would go on their date tomorrow. They walked together until they had to part ways, Natsuki went to her office, and Shizuru decided to spend the rest of the afternoon reading by the garden.

 **Later, That Night**

It was about three am, and Shizuru's breathing had finally slowed, her muscles had finally relaxed, and her heartbeat was now at a regular pace. She had finally fallen deep asleep.

It had taken her a while due to how excited she was to be leaving the Academy and seeing a new scenery. Seeing the outside world. Not to mention it was a whole day she would spend with Natsuki. It had been a while since they had done that, since they had spent a whole day together.

About an hour into her sleep, Shizuru awoke and slowly left the bed. She didn't bother picking up her robe to cover herself, to protect her body from the chilly night. And didn't bother wearing slippers or shoes either. She didn't mind walking around barefoot, the coldness of the marbled floor felt nice against her skin.

She left the comfort of her bedroom and started to walk down the corridors, there was a faint voice in her head, chanting:

 _Find the source_

 _Find the source_

 _Find the source_

In the darkness Shizuru walks, she doesn't blink, she doesn't talk.

In the darkness she opens doors, in search for something, she wants the source.

In the darkness there's little time, only deep asleep she could free her mind.

And In the darkness she's not awake, it is not her who's in command.

 _"Where shall we search today, father?"_

 **\- 0 -**

* * *

 **Thanks for Reading!**

 **That last part was a little creepy.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own the lyrics to Heart and Soul**

 **"For the love of ShizNat"**


	5. Chapter 5

**In the Darkness**

 **A Mai Otome ShizNat Story**

 **Chapter 5**

 **A Week and a Half Later...**

It was Saturday morning, and Natsuki was kneeling in front of her vintage motorcycle wearing dark-blue jeans, a pink, buttoned-up shirt, and short, black, combat boots. She was inspecting the motorcycle one more time, making sure that it had enough oil and gas, and that its tires had enough air. She was also polishing it, giving it a little love since she hadn't used it in a very long time.

She had taken the motorcycle out of the underground garage and was waiting for Shizuru in front of Garderobe's gates, just below the long set of white stairs. She rarely used the thing, never had the time to go out for a ride, so it had lost its lux, had lost its shine throughout the years.

Her duties as Headmistress and Second Column was a full-time, 24/7 job. How much free time she had on her hands depended on whether things at the Academy were running smoothly, and whether the Nations and the Council were getting along. As of right now, everything seemed to be going well. She had no complaints on either front, so she was able to take the whole weekend off.

Natsuki looked up at the sky and smiled, there wasn't a cloud in sight.

Unfortunately, due to bad, stormy weather, she ended up having to postpone going to the city on the day she had told Shizuru. It's been almost a week and a half since then. It gave Natsuki a little more time to plan where she'd take the brunette and also hear her input on where she'd like to go, what she'd like to do and see. Hear her thoughts on how she would actually like to spend her first day outside of Garderobe.

So far, the itinerary was as followed:

First, at around nine, they would have breakfast at a café in the city, the one that they used to frequent before Shizuru had gone missing. Then, they would walk around the streets of Wind Bloom and do some sightseeing, and perhaps even a little shopping. Afterwards, at around twelvish, closer to one p.m., they would head for the festival being held near Fuuka Castle. They would spend some time there, have fun riding a few rides and also eat lunch there. Then, at around three, they would stop by the local market to grab the few things they'd be needing to make dinner. And finally, they would hop on the motorcycle again and head west, head for the woods where Natsuki owned a small cabin. They would spend the rest of the day and part of the evening there, enjoying nature and doing outdoor activities, like boating and hiking. Then, they'd head back to Garderobe.

Shizuru had mentioned that she wanted to spend time somewhere secluded and quiet, like a park or something like it. She said she felt like being surrounded by nature. So, Natsuki thought the cabin was the perfect spot since Shizuru used to love going there, used to love spending time there. They used to curl up on the couch and watch old movies during the hot months, when it was too hot to be out. And during winter? During winter they used to make sweet love on the white, fuzzy rug by the fireplace. The cabin was their safe haven. They loved spending time there, loved the peace and quiet it offered.

But what Shizuru loved most about the place was being surrounded by nature, oh, and let's not forget the view. Nothing could beat the view. The view of the sky, of the moon and the stars was spectacular from there due to the lack of lighting, since it was a little far from the city.

Natsuki was sure that Shizuru would love it still, and hoped that it might help bring back some of her memories. They had good memories there, happy memories. Memories worth remembering. Memories which Natsuki will not allow Shizuru to forget.

She also wanted to talk to Shizuru in private about a few things without any interruptions.

The other night, Youko had mentioned to her that Shizuru was starting to ask questions, that she was starting to become curious as to what the nature of their relationship was prior to her disappearance. Natsuki thought that it was time to talk to her about this. She wanted to apologize to her for not telling her that they had been a couple, explain to her why she did this, and then hope for the best.

"Sweet ride" Nao commented after she had quietly climbed the Academy's tall gates, totally startling Natsuki.

"Where did you come from?" Natsuki quickly stood, eyeing the girl with a raised, suspicious brow, a hand now resting on her left hip.

"Are you just getting in?" She then noticed the young Column's pink shirt, beige hat, and yellow sunglasses. She's seen her wearing that before, a few years ago. "What the hell do you do out there all night long?"

Nao was always being sketchy. If it weren't for the fact that she could still Materialize into her Robe, Natsuki could've sworn that Nao was out there doing naughty things with random men.

But little did Natsuki know that the redhead was actually being naughty, just not _that_ kind of naughty. She was saving women and teenagers from filthy predators' kind of naughty.

"The _Gakuenchou_ doesn't need to know what I do with my free time" She replied in a soft, monotone voice. She walked past the blunette, both of her hands resting behind her head. "You don't see me asking what you're doing" Then, teased, "Or _who you're n_ o _t doing_. You must be so frustrated~"

Natsuki's cheeks turned as pink as her shirt. "S-Shut up!" She shouted at her, holding tightly to the white towel in her hands.

And Nao couldn't help and laugh, saying, "You make it too easy for me"

She was about to walk away but then spotted the incoming brunette, "Oh, here comes your woman" She was still quite a distance away, and she looked rather cute in her short, white, strapless, summer dress, and a light-pink sweater draped around her shoulders. "She's all dolled up, you guys going out on a date?"

She expected some sort of retort from the blunette, some sort of denial, but when she glanced at her direction because she heard none, she couldn't help and roll her eyes. The woman seemed paralyzed, entranced, mouth slightly agape. And the towel in her hands? She just kept twisting it and twisting it and twisting it and twisting it. The twisting seemed to never end.

Nao smirked and walked closer to Natsuki, taking yet another opportunity to tease her fellow Column, and also give her a piece advice. "She's not making it any easier for you, eh?" She muttered close to her ear, "Play your cards right and you might get lucky tonight, ne? Stop being so stiff and take command. It's kinda obvious that she's into you"

All Natsuki could do was swallow, zoning out Nao's comments. Nao didn't exist to her, only Shizuru did.

Nao then headed for the stairs, whistling. Shizuru was almost at the bottom when they crossed paths. "Good morning, Shizuru-san" She greeted her in her sweetest voice as she walked up the stairs. She was being a total suck up.

" _Ohayo_ to you as well, Juliet-san" Shizuru greeted back with a pleasant smile.

"I've already told you, it's Nao" Nao's right eye involuntarily twitched in annoyance because of this. She had told the woman a million times that it's Nao, N-A-O, even spelled it backwards for her, O-A-N, yet she keeps calling her Juliet, J-U-L-I-E-T. She was sure the brunette was doing it on purpose. "Please don't call me Juliet, no one calls me that"

" _Kannin na_ " Shizuru smiled at her. And as every single time, she said, "Must be the amnesia"

But of course, Nao didn't believe that. She made a complaining sound and kept on climbing the stairs.

" _Fufu,_ o-ha-yo, Na-tsu-ki" Shizuru then happily, playfully greeted the staring blunette. She was now standing right in front of her. " _Kannin na_ for my tardiness, I wasn't sure what to wear for the occasion"

"A-Ah, _ie ie_ , don't worry about it" Natsuki waved it off, then added just above a whisper, "You look really beautiful, Shizuru" She had never seen her in that dress before. When exactly did she get it?

And now that she realized that Shizuru was wearing fancy looking sandals and a dress, hiking was off the list, for sure.

Shizuru quietly giggled, a hand covering her rosy lips. She really liked the way Natsuki reacted to her outfit. That was the exact reaction she was looking for in the blunette. "And Natsuki looks very chic out of uniform" She complimented.

Shizuru really liked the blunette's uniform though. She absolutely loved it. She could see her perfectly shaped stomach and her cute belly button. She loved the white top that Natsuki wore, it hugged her body perfectly in the right places. Not to mention it accentuated her perfectly sized breasts. And the black slacks that she wore, how they hung around her waist, it was very sexy. Her attire was quite sexy for a timid _Gakuenchou_.

Her own uniform, however, was the total opposite. It was rather reserved. She hadn't had the chance to wear it yet, she's been wearing regular clothes this whole time. It was the peak of summer, too hot to wear such a long and heavy dress. And technically, she was not working, at least not yet. She was unable to perform any of her duties as an Otome and Column. She couldn't fight. She couldn't go on missions. She couldn't guide any of the students or help them with their studies. She couldn't advice Natsuki on political or school matters. None of the attributes that made her an Otome, a Column, were there yet.

And it made her feel completely useless.

"A-Ahem" Natsuki cleared her throat and looked away, realizing she had been staring way too long. "We should get going, the café gets pretty crowded in the morning" She grabbed her black helmet from the seat and put it on her own head. Then, she grabbed the spare one and helped Shizuru with it. Her fingers lightly touching the brunette's jaw as she fastened it, then heard the 'click' sound.

" _Ookini_ "

And Shizuru? Shizuru had that playful smirk on her lips. Her fingers reached for Natsuki's helmet, removing it from her head, and then tucking away dark tresses behind her left ear.

Ruby eyes were on Emerald ones the whole time she did this, watching her every reaction, hearing her every breath. She just loved catching her off guard, loved how innocent Natsuki looked for those first few seconds. How her eyebrows arched upwards in total wonder, total innocence, like a child, her green eyes following her hand's every movement.

After Shizuru had neatly tucked those scattered, midnight tresses behind the blunette's ear, she then went ahead and leaned forward, their noses lightly touching.

She heard as Natsuki held her breath, that's when she changed direction and placed a gentle kiss on her right cheek. Then, went ahead and added some space between then, putting the helmet back on her head, making sure she caressed every bit of her soft cheeks as she secured the buckle.

\- Click -

She was doing this on purpose. Totally. She wanted to see something, something that made her completely satisfied every time she saw it. Something that always lightened up her day, no matter how cloudy her mind was. _…Ara~ Truly worth it…_ And there it was.

"C-Can-" Natsuki stuttered, her lips trembling. Then swallowed and tried again, "Can we please go now?" She thought her cheeks were about to melt from her face. That's how hot she felt. She was sure she was as bright red as a Christmas lightbulb.

Natsuki noticed that, this past week, Shizuru had been very handsy with her. Had been teasing her a lot, like when before they were a couple. She was sure it had something to do with that darn journal of hers. She was already reading about her Pearl days, so Natsuki was certain there was something written in there that was making Shizuru behave this way. That journal was a bad influence on her. Definitely. She needed to burn it, rip it to tiny pieces.

And Natsuki was right. Shizuru was reading all sorts of things in her diary about how cute Natsuki looked when she blushed, and how easily she got uncomfortable and squirmed when given any kind of affection.

Shizuru decided to try it on her own this past week, and she found that her diary-self was completely right. Natsuki was the cutest when put on these types of situations. She made the cutest sounds and expressions. It was a sight worth being yelled at by Miss Maria, that's for sure. She had done that in public a couple of times and got scolded by the old woman.

Natsuki mounted the motorcycle and slid a little to the front to make sure Shizuru had enough space behind her.

"Had I known we were riding a motorcycle I would've worn something more fitting" Kyoto-ben softly commented as she mounted the bike behind Natsuki, making sure she was sitting on the skirt of the dress so that it didn't fly up with the wind once they were on their way.

"You'll be fine, I'm not going to go too fast" Natsuki revved the engine, "Just stay close and hold on tight, okay?" Then, let out an inaudible, deep breath when she felt the brunette wrap her hands around her waist; when she felt her chest, her breasts, pressed on her back. She could feel the rapid beat of the brunette's heart against her thin, pink shirt. It was making hers beat wildly as well. Almost in sync.

"Ready to go?" When she heard the brunette say _Hai_ , she slowly started to accelerate.

The morning and afternoon went as planned, but with just a minor mishap.

They had breakfast at the café and talked for a very long time. They didn't talk about anything specific, just random things here and there. Talked a little bit about the city and its history, talked about Natsuki's past and her family, and talked a little bit about what Shizuru was learning in class.

When the Head Chef noticed them, he immediately joined them at their table to greet them since it had been a long time since they had visited. Unfortunately, Shizuru didn't remember him, but she masked it rather well not to make him feel bad or uncomfortable. The Chef didn't let them pay for their meal on their way out, saying it was on him, which was very nice.

Afterwards, they walked around the busy streets of Wind Bloom. Shizuru was so excited to be away from the Academy, at least for a little while. It felt nice to see a new scenery, to be in a different environment. And she couldn't deny that it was a little freeing being out in the open, around random people, random strangers of different ages instead of teenage girls.

Shizuru held Natsuki's hand the whole time as they walked, excitedly dragging her from small shop to small shop. The woman even bought her a cute, thin, gold necklace that she had liked from one of the stores, one that had a crescent moon on it. She couldn't buy it since she didn't have money of her own.

" _Ie_ , just think of it as a welcome home gift"

Natsuki had told her as she fastened the thin chain around her neck.

And Shizuru thanked her by giving her a timid kiss on the cheek, no teasing, no games this time.

After that, at around twelve, they walked to the festival. There, they ate a few small dishes as they walked around. They played a few carnival games, which Natsuki was horrible at, by the way. But when Shizuru gave it a try, it just came effortlessly, and she won Natsuki a prize of her choosing. Natsuki chose a medium sized, brown, teddy bear with a red bowtie. She thought it was really cute.

And then, the minor mishap happened. Natsuki had left Shizuru unattended for a minute, just one minute. She had gone to the ice cream stand to buy some ice cream, and when she had turned around, there were a few guys surrounding the brunette. They were flirting with her. Natsuki recognized those guys, they had been following them around since the moment they had step foot in the festival.

"That's a really cute teddy bear"

One of the guys had said, to which Shizuru had smilingly yet warily replied _Ookini_.

"Why are you alone? Where's your cute friend?"

One of the other guys had said.

"Mind if we keep you company for a while?"

Then said the third.

"I'm right here" Natsuki replied for her, standing behind them. "And she does mind, please leave her be" There was a noticeable scowl on her face. "Let's go, Shizuru"

"Hey, no, don't go. Let's chat a little more"

"Yea. We were having fun, right, Shizuru?"

Natsuki gritted her teeth. Did this guy, this stranger, this a-hole, just say Shizuru's name as if he knew her? He was asking for trouble. Definitely.

And when the guy tried to grab Shizuru's arm, to prevent her from leaving, Natsuki totally lost it. All calmness and levelheadedness gone. She went berserk on him.

"Oi, don't you dare touch her!" Both ice cream cones that had previously been on her hands ended up on his eyes. And then her right fist had connected with his stomach, making him fall straight to the ground, crying like a little baby.

She quickly grabbed Shizuru's hand and made a run for it. She had already been on the newspapers once, and not in a good way. If someone actually recognized her, she was sure she'd be on the newspapers again. She didn't want to bring more embarrassment to Garderobe or her image. She could still hear Haruka's annoying laughter ringing in her ears because of what happened almost four years ago.

"D-Don't just stand there, go after them!"

They heard the guy angrily shout as they ran away. They tried to lose them by running through the crowd, cutting through.

"This way, Shizuru!" Natsuki took a left turn, hiding behind one of the food stands. She pressed Shizuru against the thin wall, holding her still.

"Did we lose-"

But Natsuki prevented the brunette from talking by covering her mouth with her right hand, making a "Shhh" sound as she looked to see if they had lost them.

And Shizuru, as she found herself being pressed against that wooden, thin wall, with Natsuki's body pressed against hers and their faces so close, Shizuru found herself looking at her, staring at her face, at her eyes, at her lips.

She took a mental note of every reaction her own body made, her own breathing, her own face heating up, the shakiness in her hands, the palpitations of her heart.

It wasn't normal, none of this was normal. The way her heart was beating wasn't normal. The way it rang so loudly in her ears wasn't normal. It felt different. For a while now, it has been different.

And everything seemed to click all of a sudden.

That Pearl in her diary, that young girl, she had changed somehow the moment she had met the blunette. Her sentences made little sense anymore when she read them, it was almost poetic: sweet and tragic and cryptic all at the same time.

And now that she was going through it herself she could understand it. Understand _her_. It was love, love was the culprit that had changed that naïve, promiscuous girl. She had fallen in love with the blunette back then, just like she was falling in love with her now.

It made her think,

Did she ever fall out of love?

She'd just have to keep reading her diary and find out.

"Can you see them?!"

"I think they went this way!"

Natsuki smirked when she saw the bastards run the opposite direction. She stayed watch for a few more seconds, one hand still on the brunette's mouth, the other on her waist. Their bodies were so close, almost mending together.

"I think it's okay for us to go now" She said as she faced the brunette again, that smile of hers slowly disappearing once she noticed how close they were. The intimate position.

Natsuki swallowed yet again as she slowly removed her hand from the woman's lips, her breathing becoming shallow because of their closeness, because their noses were almost touching.

It had been a week and a half, a very long and excruciating week and a half since she had felt those lips on hers. She wished she could just kiss her again, then and there, without having to give a single explanation of her actions. She wished she just could do it. But she didn't.

She licked her suddenly dry lips and took a step back, then another and another, adding some distance between them.

"Come Shizuru, we should go before they start looking this way" It took a lot of willpower for her to say that as calmly as she had, a lot of willpower to detach herself from the woman she loves.

And Shizuru, she felt the energy, the connection between them when their eyes met. The attraction, the desire, it was there. She wasn't imagining it, it was there, so loud and so clear. It had been there all this time, from the very beginning.

How could she have missed it?

She'd have to stop putting it off, the obvious question, the obvious conversation they needed to have. When the opportunity came, when the time was right, she'd have to ask Natsuki about their past.

" _Ha_ … _Hai_ " Shizuru distractedly replied as she tried to ignore the ringing in her ears. She tried to control the excitement she felt because of her realization.

Because of her feelings.

She took a couple of deep breaths and grabbed Natsuki's arm, trying to be as serene as possible, as normal as possible as they walked back to where they had parked the motorcycle. There was no way they could stay at the festival, not with those guys looking for them, definitely wanting to cause Natsuki harm because of what she had done to one of their posse.

It wasn't like they could harm her though. She was an Otome, a powerful Otome. But those guys didn't know that.

After that whole fiasco, they headed straight for the market and went food shopping. Natsuki had originally planned to cook dinner, but then decided to grab some _bentos_ instead since she wasn't sure if her stove had any gas left.

It had been a while since she had checked on the place. The last time she had gone there was about a year ago, and she didn't do any cooking then, she didn't eat. She had gone there because she wanted to openly cry, to let herself go without the ears and the eyes of everyone at Garderobe.

She had been missing the brunette, was becoming desperate because of the lack of news, and just needed some time for herself to mourn for her.

Once they were done choosing and paying for their _bentos_ , they hopped on the motorcycle and headed for the cabin. It took about an hour and a half for them to get there, especially since they were going a little slow. Natsuki wasn't a fast driver, she had little experience with the motorcycle, so she had to be safe.

When they arrived there, Natsuki gave the brunette a quick tour of the very small place.

It had an open concept, so it looked like a studio, no walls separating the different areas. The only room with an actual door was the bathroom.

"So, as you can see, it's very small" Natsuki explained the moment they had stepped inside. She had pressed a few numbers on the keypad next to the door to turn off the alarm. Then, she headed for the kitchen counter and placed the bag with their _bentos_ there. "There is an upstairs, but we-, _I-I_ mainly use it as storage"

Shizuru hummed, letting the blunette know she was listening. "It's very cozy. I really love it, Natsuki" She walked around the place, leaving the teddy bear on the large couch. "How long have you had this place?"

As she walked around the cabin, she noticed there weren't any pictures or any personal touches to it. There were just a few pieces of furniture, so she guessed that Natsuki must've not had it for long. Natsuki also didn't seem to have much there, making it look more spacious than it actually was. The light, wooden color of the cabin and the high ceiling seemed to help with this as well.

She had a large couch near the entrance, and a television on the wall near it. On the other side was the fireplace, with a huge, white rug in front of it. Then came the kitchen, and near the kitchen counter there was a large, wooden table. There was a lot of empty space after that, which lead to the huge bed, a dresser, and a vanity. And not too far away, next to the stairs that lead to the second floor, was the restroom.

About sixty percent of the cabin was wall to wall windows, so nature was very much present inside as much as out.

"I've had it for about three years now" Natsuki replied while leaning against the counter.

She had bought the place the year before Shizuru had gone missing. They did use it quite a lot during that year, coming over every other weekend when the brunette was not out on a mission, but had very little time to decorate. Everything, their belongings, was still in boxes on the second floor.

"Are you tired? If you'd like, you could take a nap" Natsuki then suggested, knowing that Shizuru usually took a nap at around this time.

Shizuru was a little tired, but she could nap at another time. She preferred to spend every minute she could with Natsuki. " _Ie_ , I'm fine"

"Great" Natsuki then walked over to the bedroom area and opened the very last drawer of the dresser, grabbing a large, yellow towel. "Let's go to the lake then since we still have a couple of hours of daylight left" She suggested.

They spent the rest of the afternoon on a small boat, paddling and talking, admiring the sea of green, orange and red leaves surrounding them, and enjoying each other's company. At least until Shizuru felt something, felt a drop hit her arm.

" _Ara_?"

Then felt another drop. And a couple of seconds later, felt another.

The brunette looked up. It was still sunny and there were a few clouds, but to her knowledge it wasn't supposed to rain, at least not until very late night. That's what Youko had said to her yesterday.

"Natsuki, should we be worried?"

Natsuki looked up as well, that's when she felt the drop hit her forehead. "The rain's early, we need to get off this boat"

They quickly started to paddle their way out of the lake, laughing the whole time. Their rushed paddling wasn't helping them get to shore any quicker, it was actually slowing them down since they were swirling all over the place. But at least they made it to land before they could get completely soaked, before the rain got heavy.

They quickly took cover under one of the large trees by the lake. The yellow towel which Shizuru was previously using to sit on the boat was now on both of their heads, covering them.

Natsuki sighed, a finger scratching her right cheek, "I don't think we can go back to Garderobe… We should probably stay here tonight" She commented as green eyes looked at the light rain ahead. It didn't seem like it would last long since it was somewhat sunny out, but the road would be too slippery for the motorcycle, and she was still an amateur at it. And besides, Natsuki was sure Shizuru would mind getting mud all over her pretty, white dress. It was bound to happen with the muddy road and all the potholes.

"Natsuki is not needed back at the academy?" Shizuru left her stare off the calming rain and faced the blunette, her arm leaning slightly on the large tree.

"I'm not working this weekend, so, no. This weekend I'm all yours"

Shizuru smirked, a raised brow, "All mine?"

And Natsuki lightly blushed, quickly muttering, "Y-You know what I mean, Shizuru"

After a long moment of silence, a long moment of hearing the rain hitting the leaves, of watching the rain drops land on the large body of water in front of them, of feeling as the rain started to become less and less and less, Shizuru went ahead and grabbed the blunette's left hand, slowly intertwining their fingers together.

"It's beautiful here, Natsuki. Thank you for sharing this place with me" She softly smiled at her, adding "I really love it here. It feels very…" She tried to find the right word for it, "Zen"

Natsuki looked at her in the eyes, her thumb softly touching the brunette's in a circular motion. "You asked for a quiet and secluded place, I couldn't think of a better place than this" Then, mimicked the brunette and leaned against the tree as well, softly asking, "Does it meet your expectations, Shizuru?"

Shizuru nodded, "It's a million times better" Kyoto-ben replied with a warm smile.

Ruby eyes stared at Emerald ones for a moment. Then, stared at her lips. She was debating whether she should bring it up now or leave it for much later. The timing seemed right though, the ambiance and the connection was there. So, what was impeding her from saying the words?

Was it fear of disillusion?

Fear of being wrong?

Fear of unrequited love?

Natsuki stared at Ruby eyes and then at her lips. That's when she noticed that she was biting her lower lip, as if thinking.

Natsuki took a deep breath and took a step back, doing what she had been doing the past four weeks, drawing an invisible line between them, a line she wasn't ready to cross, not yet. Not when it looked like they were going to be stuck in this place the whole night.

If something went wrong between them, where would she hide?

"The rain isn't that bad anymore" She softly said, trying to fill the silence, "We should probably head back before it picks up again" And she removed the towel from their heads, folding it as she started to walk away.

"Natsuki" Shizuru called her name, standing totally still. She stood up straight, a hand resting on the large oak tree. She could feel the woody bumps, the sharp edges against her fingertips. "There's something I've been meaning to ask you"

When Natsuki turned around, when their eyes met, she suddenly felt nervous. She averted the blunette's gaze. "I..." It took her a few seconds to put the sentences together in her head. She gathered enough courage and looked her straight in the eyes when she said this, "I… I feel this- There's this… this energy between us. This connection that I can't explain" She was hoping the blunette would take it from there, but she said nothing, so she continued.

"It's a little confusing sometimes… I can't tell if my dreams are just that, dreams, or if they're real, if they're a part of my memories" She couldn't help and swallow, her heartbeat making it difficult for her to focus, "That- that day, the day when I woke up, you said some things. You… You kissed me. Why did you do that, Natsuki?"

Natsuki didn't say anything for a few seconds, just stared at the brunette. She felt as the drops started to become frequent again, rapid again, the rain was starting to pick up again. She felt the drops on her shoulders, on her head. Felt them caressing her nose, watched them obstruct her view.

She didn't answer the brunette's question, but said something else. "Would you believe me if I told you that we are just friends" No question mark. Her tone, the way she had said it, it didn't sound like a question.

"Just friends?" Shizuru softly asked, her eyebrows furrowing a little.

" _You and I…"_

"You and I, we… we can never be just friends" Shizuru repeated the words Natsuki had told her long ago, those words now fresh in her mind. "Y-You know this, I know this"

Natsuki took a cautious step forward, towards the tree. And then another, and another, walking slowly in the rain. She was eyeing the brunette curiously, "What did you just say to me?" She wanted to make sure she was hearing her correctly, that she was using her own words against her.

For a moment, just a moment, Shizuru felt like she had transported back in time. It felt so vivid in her mind, so vivid on her lips, the way Natsuki had kissed her that day, the way she had pulled her down and claimed her own lips as hers.

" _Even though I don't say it, I do feel it, Shizuru"_

It was so confusing, more so when things didn't exactly align in her head. She couldn't tell when things began and when they ended.

"What did you just say to me, Shizuru?" Natsuki slowly repeated one more time. She was now in front of the brunette. She had walked there so slowly, so, so slowly, because if she had walked any faster, she thought she might scare her.

And Shizuru, she had to take a step back. She was feeling a little overwhelmed, too much going on in her head, in her mind. But there was no where to go, both, Natsuki and the tree were preventing her from doing so.

"What… What was I to you?" Shizuru finally whispered to her, asked a question of her own. "What were we to one another before I blacked out?" Natsuki's wet nose was now touching hers, her Emerald eyes looking at her, not for one second breaking eye contact with her.

After a few seconds of silence, "I was yours" Came the husky, honest answer, "And you were mine"

"…Was?" She felt the woman's moist, right hand on her left cheek, her thumb on her chin, just below her trembling lips.

"I am yours" Natsuki whispered to the brunette. She felt as if her heart was beating so slow, or maybe it was beating so fast that it seemed like it was beating so slow. She had to lick her lips even though they were moist from the rain before she could ask the next question. "What about you, Shizuru? Are you… still mine?"

And Shizuru looked at her for a long, long second. Her lungs were filled with Natsuki's scent. Her lips trembled from her touch. Her heart beat recklessly because of her proximity, because of her words. And finally, finally, she slowly nodded yes. It was the truth, she wasn't lying, she was still hers. She was in love with her.

And after she had done that, it was as if she had unleashed something within herself and within the blunette. Their lips met rapidly in a hard, searing, desperate kiss.

Natsuki pressed her body against hers, their hands roaming each other's bodies, their backs, their hips, their heads, their faces. Kneading and squeezing anywhere and everywhere they possibly could. Giving-in without a single hesitation to their body's desires.

And when they parted, it was hard to stay that way, hard to stay apart. They dived right in again in a matter of seconds, hands now in hair, lips biting lips, lips sucking neck, a thigh now rubbing against the other's sex,

"Mmm"

Eliciting throaty moans, feeling the vibrations of those moans drowning on the other's lips.

"L-Let's make a run for it" Natsuki somehow let out through shaky lips, "The cabin's not too far" Her moist forehead now resting on Shizuru's own.

When Shizuru nodded, she grabbed her hand and started to run, run in the rain, run through the woods, run towards her cabin. They weren't that far, so they made it there in two minutes time.

As soon as they made it inside and slammed the door behind them, chests heaving, lips and noses heavily breathing; their mouths and hands found their way to one another again. They just couldn't get enough of each other, couldn't keep their hands off one another. They wanted this. Wanted this badly.

Shizuru hastily walked backwards as they desperately kissed, hoping to at some point hit the couch. But they somehow ended up in the kitchen, her back against the large, wooden table.

Shizuru then halted the kiss, Ruby eyes now staring at the blunette's damp, pink shirt, fingers first untucking it from the girl's jeans before heading back to the top, fumbling with the small buttons.

Natsuki made it so hard for her to focus though. Her hands were on her hips, her lips were on her neck, sucking her there, "Mmm~" Making her close her Ruby eyes and moan in pleasure again.

"N-Natsuki, help me t-take this off" She had to tell her between breaths, unable to take it. Unable to make any progress with the piece of clothing.

And Natsuki quickly did. She hurried and detached her hands and lips from the brunette's body and started to quickly unbutton her shirt. Her lips trembling when she saw Shizuru going for her jeans, quickly unbuttoning it for her, unzipping it. She had to swallow hard, and quickly wriggled out of her muddy boots and socks, and then out of those wet jeans, her underwear going down with them because of how tight they were. She was still wearing her pink shirt, but at least it was already fully open, fully unbuttoned, so Shizuru wouldn't have to worry about it anymore.

And as soon as she was out of the jeans she quickly went back and pressed her body against the brunette's. Shizuru's hands were now tugging at her warm skin from inside her shirt, squeezing her bum, pressing their bodies closer together as they kissed again.

And when their lips parted this time, Natsuki didn't waste a second and started to unzip the brunette's white dress. She felt like her heart was going at one-thousand-beats per second, and she was feeling lightheaded, so, so lightheaded. She had to rest her forehead against the brunette's own for a moment and slowly breathe. She had to close her eyes to be able to calm her rapid heart as she slowly unzipped the side of her strapless, white dress.

And while Natsuki did this, both of Shizuru's hands caressed the blunette's face, her cheeks, her lips. She placed soft kisses on that beautiful face as she felt her dress drop on the floor, her panties going down with them. She stepped out of them and wrapped her arms around the shorter woman's neck. She kissed her lips as she felt her pick her up and walk the short distance to the bed, laying her there.

Natsuki hovered over Shizuru. One of her hands was resting on the bed, supporting her own weight. The other hand was about to start making a hot trail south that glorious body beneath her.

Emerald eyes were on Rubies the whole time she did this. Her fingertips started by touching Shizuru's nose, then her lips, then her chin, then slowly going down her neck.

Then, moving lower, making a trail between the woman's breasts, going down to her ribs, then her stomach, her belly button, then her sex. She halted there for a moment, caressed her there, caressed her trimmed curls, caressed the skin there. Saw as she arched and shuddered, Ruby eyes unable to keep up with her stare because she was close to her center.

Then, continuing her route to her inner thigh, parting her legs so that she could situate herself between them.

Once she was in between the woman's legs, she gently lay on her and watched her blushing face for a moment, waiting for Shizuru to look at her in the eyes again. And when she did, she gently went down for one more kiss.

But this kiss wasn't like the other kisses, this one wasn't fast or desperate, this one was the opposite. This kiss was slow, very slow and very tender.

She stayed that way for a long while, caressing Shizuru with her lips, kissing her this way. It seemed like Shizuru knew, remembered how they made love because she was doing everything they always did, everything the exact, same way.

She caressed her face as they kissed, then those hands made their way to her ears, caressing her there, then into her cobalt hair, tugging her there as well. Then she stopped their kiss to look her straight in the eyes.

It's like she knew.

Because that's when she softly kissed her cheek and then her nose, and then her lips. And then she parted her legs a little more, wrapping it around her hips, giving her more access than before. That's when she pulled her down and rested their foreheads together. That's when she felt her breasts on Shizuru's breasts. And that's when Shizuru nodded to her, silently asking her to please not wait any longer and make love to her. To make love to her the way she loves it, the way she craves it.

And Natsuki did. She started to slowly grind on her. Very, very slowly. She stared at Shizuru in the eyes the whole time. They always did this, always stared at each other in the eyes until they could no longer hold their stare due to the rhythm, due to the throbbing pleasure they felt between their thighs.

"Mmmm~"

About three minutes into their slow yet hard grinding, three minutes into their swing of hips, Shizuru couldn't hold her moans any longer, finally shutting her eyes really tight. She was close, very close, just needed a few deep thrusts to get there, to release.

But Natsuki came first. This always happened when she tried to put the other woman first. She tried to hold on as long as she could, she really did, but it was so hard when the woman she loved made such sexy sounds, totally raising her arousal, her libido. When she was breathing so heavily on her lips, when she was moaning in pleasure. When she kept gasping and whispering:

Yes, Natsuki,

Harder,

Faster,

Yes!

Natsuki slowed for a few seconds, "Nnnn~" letting out a high whimper, feeling as the waves of her climax pulsed between her legs. It seemed like Shizuru noticed because then and there, she had kissed her so sweetly on her forehead and then her lips.

A few seconds later, she picked up her pace and didn't stop until she felt those long nails of hers digging hard into her skin, until she felt her shudder beneath her. Until she felt her arc, gasp, and then completely stop.

That's when she knew Shizuru had orgasmed.

 **About Three Hours Later…**

"Natsuki, what will happen to me if I never fully recover my memories?" Shizuru thought aloud as they ate dinner on the kitchen counter.

Shizuru was sitting on it, her _bento_ on one hand, chopsticks subconsciously playing around with a few pieces of vegetables that were left. Natsuki was standing next to her, eating as well.

After their love making, they took a much needed shower, changed into fresh clothing, and had a very long talk. Natsuki had explained that when Shizuru didn't recognize her that morning when she had awoken, she had decided to just wait and give her time to remember on her own. She also explained to her that things between them were a little rocky before she had disappeared. That they were a couple, that they were together, but that Natsuki had some issues of her own that she needed to resolve. That things weren't rosy and peachy all the time.

Shizuru seemed to understand this, knowing that every couple had their differences, so didn't press Natsuki on what her issues were. She was sure she would read about it at some point in her diary.

"If I don't recover all my memories, will I have to leave Garderobe?" Shizuru continued.

She had overheard one of the teachers saying that perhaps, with the graduation ceremony approaching, the Headmistress will probably make one of the Trias a Column, since one of the spots was technically open.

Natsuki placed her unfinished dinner on the counter. "Of course not, Shizuru" She then grabbed the brunette's _bento_ and chopsticks and put those aside as well, it seemed like she was done with it. And it was very unlike Shizuru to be playing with her food, which made Natsuki think that Shizuru was worried. Very worried.

"You're only saying that because you're the Headmistress"

Natsuki brought a finger to the woman's chin and raised it, making eye contact with her. "You're not going anywhere. Garderobe will always be your home, memories or not. Column or not. Understand?" When Shizuru nodded, she then continued. "I think your memories will come back soon, it's just taking a little time. You've got twenty nine-" She stopped there for a moment. Was she supposed to count the past two years the brunette had been missing? She doesn't know if Shizuru had blacked out the moment she had disappeared, or after. It was so confusing. "Twenty seven years worth of memories to remember" She corrected the sentence.

"Everything is a mess in my head, Natsuki" Shizuru said with a frown. "Sometimes I feel as if there's someone else in there"

And Natsuki wasn't sure what she meant by that, "Is the journal helping at all?"

"I think it is" In a way, it was helping. The book wasn't totally useless. It did help explain and remember certain things. "But there's a lot of grey areas in between. I stopped writing as frequently"

Her Coral and Pearl years were a very exciting time for her. She wrote almost every day. Now, she was starting to read about the time after she had graduated Garderobe, after she had been chosen to be a Column. She wasn't writing as much anymore, or at least not in detail, just a few entries here and there. It seemed like she was traveling a lot then.

"I see…" Natsuki let out rather pensively. "How do your memories come to you? Have you noticed what triggers them?"

Shizuru wrapped her arms around the blunette's neck, thinking. "I think most of it comes in my dreams, that's why I'm having a little trouble distinguishing what's real and what I'm making up in my head"

Natsuki nodded, understanding her predicament.

"But sometimes it comes with a sound, a word" Shizuru kept on, "Sometimes a feeling. Sometimes a touch… Sometimes it just pops up randomly when I'm walking around. It's not very precise, I'm afraid" She finished that last sentence with a long sigh.

"Hmm" Natsuki hummed, a scowl present on her lips.

"Natsuki's face is wrinkling again"

Natsuki softly tapped on her own forehead, "Ah, it is" Then tried to smile at the brunette. She couldn't help and worry though, she wished she knew where Shizuru had been for the past two years. If she had been hurt. If someone did something to her.

" _Kannin na_ , I didn't mean to worry you"

"My job is to worry" Natsuki gave her a small, true smile, her hands wrapping around Shizuru's waist, pulling her body closer to hers. "Shizuru, has anything come to you in your dreams about the time you were away?" She asked softly, her face was serious though.

When Shizuru didn't reply, she continued. "You mentioned coldness and darkness before, what do you mean exactly?"

"Please don't ask me, I don't know. That's the only thing that came to me" Shizuru said as she looked away, becoming aggravated.

She really wished she knew. Every night she tries to remember, but nothing comes to her. Nothing but whispers and strange sounds. She couldn't even make out what it was.

"Okay, I'm sorry" Her hand went up to Shizuru's face. "Look at me…" And when she did, "I'm sorry" She said again. "I know this makes you feel uncomfortable, but this is important. If anything comes to you, Shizuru, anything at all, you've got to tell me, okay? You can't try to figure this out on your own"

Shizuru sighed, and then nodded. "I will, I promise" Her hands went for Natsuki's cheeks and pulled her in for a sweet, lingering kiss.

When their lips parted, Natsuki glanced at the clock, then smiled and said, "Come, Shizuru. There's something I'd like to show you" She helped the woman off the counter, "Close your eyes. And please don't peak" And then slowly led her to the side of the cabin which had the wall to wall window. She could clearly see the shine of the moon on the wooden floor, it was illuminating the place.

"Can I open my eyes now?"

"Don't be impatient, that was never one of your traits" Once they got there, she positioned the brunette. Then, stood next to her. She intertwined their fingers together and smiled, looking at her beautiful face.

"Okay, you can open your eyes now" And when the brunette did, she couldn't help and smirk. The smile on Shizuru's face was priceless, totally priceless. She wished she could make her smile like that every single day for the rest of her life.

"You might not remember this, so I don't know if you will appreciate the irony" Natsuki softly started as she caressed the woman's hand. "but I'm a calculating woman, a woman of science… I believe in technology, in the Founder, in things that make sense and that I can explain"

When Shizuru looked her in the eyes and nodded, silently asking her to continue, she did, "You were gone for a long time, Shizuru… Every night that you were gone, I did something I've never done before... I-I prayed. I prayed to that thing" Natsuki motioned for the moon and paused for a brief moment, she felt like she was going to cry because of the painful memories, and she didn't want to, so she held it. "I know it's silly and it doesn't make sense, but I did. I asked that thing to bring you back to me, every single night I did"

" _I love you, Natsuki"_

" _I know"_

" _Even though I don't say it, do feel it, Shizuru"_

Shizuru pursed her lips and swallowed, suddenly realizing one of Natsuki's 'issues' as she had called it earlier. The memory suddenly coming to her.

"And I realized that it doesn't have to make sense, some things just never do. Some things just happen and can never be explained"

Shizuru didn't blink. She could hear the 'Dadum' sound of her own heart so loudly, so clearly in her ears. She knew where this conversation was leading. She knew what the woman was going to say. She felt so nervous, so happy, so excited, and she knew why. She had been waiting so long to hear her say it. To hear those words out loud. Deep inside her, deep in her mind, she was rejoicing.

"I love you, Shizuru" Natsuki said with a soft smile on her face, "I've always loved you"

And a tear escaped the brunette. A tear of happiness, of joy. She wasn't able to contain the smile that adorned her lips, whispering, "I know"

 **\- 0 -**

* * *

 **Thanks for Reading!**

 **And thanks for the Reviews/ Comments**

 **Let me know your thoughts on the chapter. Thx!**

 **"For the love of ShizNat"**


	6. Chapter 6

**In the Darkness**

 **A Mai Otome ShizNat Story**

 **Chapter 6**

It was approximately two a.m. when the brunette lifelessly opened her tired, sleepy eyes. She was laying on the bed, laying on her left side, and was facing a slumbering blunette. Her right hand was resting on the blunette's waist, and a white comforter was covering their bodies, keeping them warm from the waist down.

Ruby eyes stared ahead for a long moment, eyes adjusting to the new type of light. The moon was shining bright tonight, the moonlight coming in through the windows. It was illuminating the whole place, giving everything inside a bright, silver color.

" _She has company tonight, father"_

A voice said, but her mouth was closed. Not a word was uttered, not a sound was heard in the room. The voice, it was in her head.

" _And she doesn't seem to be in the usual setting"_

 **Same Time,**

 **Unknown Location**

"Hmm, you're right, son" The older of the two said once he had looked up to stare at the massive screen in front of them.

At the moment, he could see everything the brunette could see, hear everything she could hear. Right now, she was their eyes and ears. They were in her head, controlling her mind, her body's movements.

And right now, they could see a beautiful, sleeping blunette. And they could clearly see the blue Gem adorning her left ear. It meant that this blunette, she possessed the powers as well, she was like the mysterious brunette.

"What should we do, father? Should we disconnect?"

The father thought about this for a little while. Then, decided, "Nonsense, let's take a look around. We might find something of value, something that could lead us to the source"

He walked over to his son's side and stood next to him. His son was laying down on a bed with his eyes closed and a transparent helmet on his recently shaved head.

Every night, before connecting, he shaved his head and injected himself with the same serum they had used on the brunette. He did this to be able to use the helmet that linked him to the brunette's mind.

Out of the two, only he could do it. He was younger, stronger, and also closer to brunette in age. Connecting drained a lot of his energy as well as the brunette's, his father was a little weak and wouldn't be able to handle it.

The transparent helmet on his head did both, connect to the woman's mind, and project and record everything he was seeing on the screen ahead of them. They recorded, collected data so that they could later analyze it. They could miss a lot of things, a lot of details while _live._ The recorded data helped them go back and look at the footage, helped them plan what to do and where to search next.

This technology that they were using was very old technology, technology that no one used anymore because the process alone was lengthy, was very stressful on the body, and it was nearly useless since the effects eventually wore off.

It was the only method they could use on the brunette though. After a long year of trying, of torture tactics, they found that they couldn't break the woman, couldn't persuade her, couldn't make her take their side. She was not easily fooled; she was too smart, and her mind was too strong to manipulate.

So, they began the long process of moving her memories around in her head. It took them nearly a year to do just that, to alter her memories, to induce amnesia. The only way they could control her was by blurring, distorting all the information in her brain. By making her forget, making her extremely vulnerable and confused. Confused to the point of not even remembering her own name.

They also did a blood wash, removing most of those curious particles that were in her bloodstream so that they could study them, perhaps even replicate them. And injected a neon-yellow serum in her nervous system every night for a whole year. This serum did both, induce amnesia, and give them access to her nervous system. That way, while she was deep asleep, while she had no control over her senses, her body, or her mind, they could slip right in and take over, take total control.

Unfortunately, the human body is in deep sleep, in 'full state of rest' for approximately one and a half to two hours at most each night. So, they had a very small window whenever they connected to move around, a very small window to find what they were looking for.

To find the source.

And they were also racing against the clock. Once the brunette recovered all her memories they wouldn't be able to control her anymore. It didn't help that the brunette had those curious particles in her bloodstream, healing her even faster. And the neon-yellow serum slowly deteriorated, weakened as the memories returned.

That's why no one used this old technology anymore. It was nearly useless. It took too much effort to administer, and it brought very little successful results.

But Father was desperate, and desperate times called for desperate measures.

"Slowly move from the bed, my son. We do not want to wake her lovely companion" The father instructed as he watched the screen, his hands folding over his chest.

The son did as was told. With his mind, he controlled the brunette, he told her what to do.

Right now, he was her.

He slowly removed his arm from the sleeping form, slowly uncovered the comforter from his body, throwing it on the floor. He slowly left the bed, and gently, silently walked around the small room, making sure not to make any sounds, not to wake the sleeping blunette.

He touched the surfaces as he went, looked at items. Everything in this cabin seemed so interesting, so outdated compared to the previous setting they had been in.

Then, he instructed the brunette to walk towards the front door. Once there, he opened it and slowly stepped outside. It took him a while to react by what he saw.

"Father, can you see this? Can you hear this?" The son said in awe as he looked at the view ahead of him.

There were so many colors, so much life on this planet. The dark brown of the wet mud, the lighter brown of the oak trees, the brilliant green of the thick grass, and the different colored flowers and leaves.

And there were so many sounds as well. So many different sounds. The sound of the light rain, the sound of the chirping birds, the crickets, the wind, he could also faintly hear water, perhaps a stream. Everything was so lively, so vivid, so… beautiful.

In his planet, however, there was nothing but desolation left. Half the planet was covered in ice, the other half in sand. Everywhere they looked there was ice and sand. Mankind had destroyed everything. The thirst for power, for technology, for advancement, had destroyed everything, had led them to nuclear war.

Unfortunately, the planet was the one who took the strongest hit. The war killed it, it was near inhabitable anymore, the air nearly unbreathable anymore. They were slowly dying.

"That's called nature, my son" The father explained, not really caring about what this planet had to offer. All he cared about was power, all he cared about was the source. He wanted the source. "Don't get distracted, keep going"

 **About Forty Minutes Later,**

 **Planet Earl**

 **Back at the Cabin**

"Cold" Natsuki huskily said with her eyes closed. She was suddenly feeling cold, feeling a breeze hit her bare feet. Somehow, the comforter that was previously covering her body, keeping her warm, had ended up on the floor.

It was the middle of summer, but at this time of night, the temperatures dropped significantly due to the high altitude.

Her hand instinctively reached out for the brunette next to her, wanting to hug her, to cuddle her, to steal her warmth, but only found the empty space.

She slowly opened her Emerald eyes and raised her head a little, "Shizuru?" She softly, sleepily called out, thinking the brunette might've just gone to the restroom.

She rested her head on her pillow again and waited in silence for a few seconds but heard no reply. And also noticed that there was no sound coming from the restroom, the lights weren't on either. That's when she raised to a sitting position on the bed and saw that the front door was wide open, and that the comforter was on the floor.

"That's odd…" She let out, slowly getting out of the bed and grabbing the long robe on the chair near the stairs that led to the second floor. She noticed Shizuru's robe and slippers were still there, next to hers, left untouched.

She tied the knot of her robe as she walked towards the front door. Once she got there, she looked around but Shizuru was nowhere in sight.

"Shizuru?" She called out a little louder but there was no reply. Only the sound of the crickets, and a scared running rabbit could be heard.

Natsuki walked down the short set of wooden steps and kneeled, that's when Emerald eyes noticed the tracks, the trail of footprints on the wet, muddy ground.

She decided to follow the footprints, knowing they would surely lead her to Shizuru.

And after twenty minutes of walking through the woods, twenty minutes of going through bushes and ducking through branches, twenty minutes of walking around boulders and climbing through muddy slopes, she found the brunette.

"There you are..." Natsuki was glad to have found her, but also couldn't help and feel concerned.

Shizuru was standing not too far ahead. She was looking down, her feet submerged on the lake. Natsuki found this completely odd, completely out of character. What exactly was Shizuru doing? What was she looking at?

She went ahead and slowly walked towards her direction. In every step that she took, there was a slight hesitation.

"Shizuru?" She called her name, but the brunette didn't turn around, didn't even acknowledge her existence. Shizuru didn't move at all.

She went ahead and walked in the lake, her feet now submerged in the cold water as well. She kept on walking until she was by her side.

"Hey, Shizuru?" She reached out for the brunette's shoulder, touched her. That's when she gained her attention, when she got some sort of reaction out of her.

Just a second ago, all Shizuru could see was darkness, all she could hear was emptiness. And suddenly, there was a beam of light. A beam of light accompanied with a faint, white noise. The light was starting to blur, and her vision, her sight, was starting to come back to her. Clearing.

" _Ara_?" Shizuru softly let out, somewhat disoriented and confused, blinking rapidly. She was awake now, and she was slowly coming back to her senses.

" _Ara?_ " She slowly looked around, looked at her surroundings, and then turned around to settle her eyes on Natsuki's face. She was confused as to where she was, and how she got there. Why she was in the lake of all places at this time of night.

"What are you doing, Shizuru?" Natsuki softly asked, a worried expression on her features. When she held her hand, she noticed how cold Shizuru felt. "How long have you been out here?"

"I… I-I don't know" Shizuru shivered, answered honestly, and then looked at the water, at her feet. "W-Why are we in the lake, N-Natsuki?"

Natsuki didn't say anything, didn't answer her question. She wasn't sure how to reply to that anyway. She also didn't press any further, Shizuru seemed so confused, so lost, so disoriented. She knew she wasn't going to get anything out of her, not in this condition.

"Come, Shizuru" Instead, she grabbed her hand tighter and guided her out of the lake. Once they were out, she removed her robe and wrapped it around Shizuru's shoulders, trying to keep her warm. Shizuru was visibly shivering now. "Let's go back to the cabin and warm you up"

They silently walked back towards the cabin, and when they got there, they both had to take a warm shower. Especially Shizuru, she really needed it, she was extremely cold, she was wet from head to toe, had a few scratches here and there, and was also covered in mud.

Natsuki figured she had gone out while it was still raining, and had probably injured herself while walking through the bushes and branches.

Luckily, there was some gas left on the tank, so she was able to use the stove to brew warm tea after their shower.

"Does Natsuki know if I have a tendency of sleepwalking?" Shizuru thoughtfully asked as she tasted some of her warm tea.

She had fresh, long pajamas on and was covered in a large, fuzzy, warm blanket. Natsuki had already attended to her scratches and cuts. They weren't deep, just minor cuts that would fade in a few hours' time with the help of the nanomachines in her bloodstream.

Sleepwalking. It was the only logical explanation the brunette could find. Nothing else could explain how she unconsciously left the bed, left the cabin in the middle of the night, and walked all the way to the lake. She had no recollection of doing this. None whatsoever. Her mind was completely blank of the occurrence.

Shizuru drank some more of her tea as she watched the pensive blunette. The warm, spicy liquid warmed her right up, made her blood flow.

"To my knowledge, no. It's the first time I've ever seen you do this" Natsuki pensively replied, green eyes settled on her untouched cup of ginger tea the whole time. Shizuru's suggestion did make sense though. "We should ask Youko when-"

"A-Ara, more tests?" Kyoto-ben couldn't help and frown, interrupting her lover.

If they talked to Youko, that's what would happen. Tests. More and more tests. More time at the lab. More of being poked at like if she was a science experiment. She didn't like that, she was tired of it. But apparently, she had no choice in the matter. She had to do what she was told.

Natsuki placed her cup of tea on the coffee table. She held onto the brunette's hand and said with a frown, "I know, Shizuru. I know you don't like it. I'm sorry, but we-"

"But it's only sleepwalking" Shizuru quickly added, interrupted the woman, making her slightly jump. "It's normal. There's nothing wrong with me. It's _only_ sleepwalking"

Natsuki didn't think the brunette would react this way. She wasn't sure what was happening right now, why she was using that tone of voice. Why she had snapped at her.

"Shizuru, it's just a precaution" She softly, calmly replied. She watched as Shizuru quietly set her tea on the coffee table in front of them and then stood from the couch. _…Oi…_ Shizuru was visibly upset now.

This sight wasn't new to Natsuki though, it's not like they hadn't argued before. They had argued a few times before the brunette had gone missing. Especially on their third year as a couple, more so because of her so called 'Issues'. That's the only thing they really ever argued about.

"It seems I do not have a say in this, so this conversation is over" The brunette announced, displeased. "I'm going to sleep. I have a long day of tests ahead of me" She handed Natsuki the blanket that was previously keeping her warm. "Natsuki can sleep on the couch. I don't-"

"I know, I get it, you don't have to say it" Natsuki interrupted the woman, sighing. She closed her eyes and rubbed her temples in irritation. "You don't want to be touched, right?" She finished the brunette's sentence for her. That's what Shizuru always said when they argued and she didn't want her in her bed.

Ruby eyes narrowed at Emerald ones because of this, fists tightening and pursing her lips. She couldn't even do that anymore, finish her own sentences anymore. She couldn't do anything on her own. It was so frustrating.

"If I were Natsuki, I would not come anywhere near me. I would be afraid for my safety… Do we have an understanding?"

Natsuki didn't say a word. The way the brunette had said that, so calmly and with that look in her eyes, it brought chills down her spine, and not in a good way. Those eyes of hers, those eyes said it all.

" _Oyasumi_ " Shizuru calmly said. Then, she walked over to the bedroom area, climbed on the large bed, covered herself with the comfy comforter from head to toe, and tried to fall asleep.

"You're as stubborn as ever you know!" Natsuki couldn't help and shout from the couch, one eye twitching, her cheeks pink from annoyance. "This is ridiculous" Then muttered, trying to make herself comfortable there. She lay there and covered the lower part of her body with the thick blanket Shizuru had left behind.

Today had gone so well, she doesn't understand what happened, how things suddenly turned on her. And why they were arguing about this.

"Why do I always end up on the couch?" She muttered to herself as she raised again and fluffed the cushion below her.

Whenever they fought in the cabin, that's where she ended up, the couch.

Back in Garderobe, she just went to her room and slept in the comfort of her own bed. But not in the cabin though. In the cabin she took the couch. It's not like she ever slept when they argued, anyway. Sleep always eluded her. "I should invest in a better couch"

After twenty minutes of laying there with her Emerald eyes closed, twenty minutes of laying there trying to fall asleep, and miserably failing at it, Natsuki felt as the brunette approached her and raised the blanket, felt her lay next to her, felt as she hugged her, then felt as she kissed her cheek.

"Natsuki, are you asleep?" Kyoto-ben whispered, the tip of her nose lightly touching the blunette's soft cheek.

When Natsuki opened her eyes and faced her, the tip of their noses now touching, Shizuru closed her eyes, leaned the short distance, and tenderly kissed her lips.

" _Kannin na,_ I shouldn't have reacted the way I did" Shizuru whispered once their lips had parted, "I'll do whatever you ask, I know it's for my wellbeing"

Natsuki sighed and wrapped an arm around the brunette's waist. In those twenty minutes of complete silence, of deep thought, one particular sentence the brunette had said resonated in her head.

She moved a little to lay on her side, wanting to see the brunette's face better. She wanted Shizuru to look her in the eyes when she said this; To look her in the eyes so that there weren't any doubts later.

"You do have a say in all of this, Shizuru" Natsuki gently touched the brunette's face. She caressed her jaw, her thumb grazed her lower lip, unable to touch her cheek because of the long, thin, fresh cut she had there.

"Youko will advise what she thinks should be done. And if there is something you don't feel comfortable doing, or something you just don't want to do, you do have a say, Shizuru. It's your body, you are allowed to say no" She then added, "It would be better if you cooperated, whatever Youko suggests, she means you no harm... But you do have a choice" She leaned forward for a short brush of lips, just a small caress, "Don't ever feel like you don't have a say. You do. Your voice matters, your opinion matters"

Shizuru couldn't help the blush on her face as she nodded, then buried her face in the blunette's neck. " _Ookini,_ Natsuki" Came the muffled sound. "You don't know how relieved these words make me feel… I feel like I have no control over anything. Everything is decided for me"

Natsuki frowned, knowing there was truth in Shizuru's words.

"Natsuki is frowning again" Shizuru let out with a small yawn. Feeling extremely sleepy, her energy leaving her.

And within seconds Natsuki's frown turned upside down, "What? How do you know? You're not even looking at me, Shizuru"

"Because Natsuki's job is to worry" Shizuru sleepily said with eyes closed and a soft smile on her face, repeating the words the woman had told her just a few hours ago.

After a few seconds of silence, Shizuru continued, "I try my best to protect this world, to make this world a better place for Natsuki, so that she could be happy, so that she doesn't have to worry… I don't like it when she worries" Then, softly added, "And here I am, being the cause of her worries. That was not my intention. _Kannin na_ , Natsuki"

Natsuki's lips couldn't help and quiver by these words. This was not the first time she had heard Shizuru say them, or at least something similar to them. She knew that Shizuru must be talking from memories now, talking from past experience when she said that.

A few years back, the leader from Aswad, Midori, had asked Shizuru while in battle why she used her strength to protect this world. And Shizuru had answered, then and there, that it was for the person she cares about. For the person she loves. That's what Shizuru had said, she was there, she heard it clearly.

Shizuru was the one person she trusted most, the one person she knew would do the right thing, make the right decisions while out in missions. That's why even though she preferred to have Shizuru by her side at all times, she sent her out, because no one did a better job than Shizuru. No one did the work as meticulously and as carefully and as fast as Shizuru. Shizuru could've said no, could've asked her to send someone else so that they could spend more time together, but she never did. She gladly took whatever assignment needed to be done.

And now she knew why. Shizuru did it for her. She always risked her life for her, always did it so that she didn't have to, so that she could remain in Garderobe where nothing could touch her, so she could be safe and sound.

" _Arigato_ , Shizuru" Natsuki gently kissed the brunette's head. By the rhythm of her breathing, by the serene falling and rising of her chest, she guessed that Shizuru had already fallen asleep.

"You protected me and took care of me all these years, now let me protect you and take care of you" She hugged her tighter, keeping her warm against her body.

And then, slowly, in the comfort of her lover's embrace, she finally fell asleep.

When Natsuki woke up in the morning, she briefly awoke the brunette and guided her to bed. She told her that she'd be right back, that she would head to the nearest market to buy some groceries so that they could eat breakfast, and also fill up her motorcycle's tank since it was almost empty.

When she returned, the brunette was still deep asleep, so Natsuki went ahead and put the groceries away and crawled back into bed with her, stayed there with her until she awoke.

When Shizuru woke up, between whispers and laughter and kisses and caresses, their playful mood turned into sexy mood, so they made love for the second time in less than 24 hours.

The rest of the morning and part of the afternoon was spent exploring the woods. They went for a long walk, talked, had a picnic and even took a brief nap under one of the large oak trees by the lake.

They said goodbye to the cabin at around four p.m. and headed back to the city. It took them about two hours to get there since they had made several stops along the way. They bought some nicknacks and an array of tealeafs from different local shops.

When they arrived at Wind Bloom, they headed straight for the restaurant where they would be having dinner. After that, they took a long walk around the streets of Wind Bloom, ice creams in hand.

And Natsuki could've sworn she had spotted Nao with a group of people, heading for an alley, but she disregarded it. Tonight was about Shizuru. She'd have to ask Nao about what she saw tomorrow morning.

At around nine p.m. they headed back to Garderobe. They separated then, both women went to their respective rooms to shower and ready for bed.

After Shizuru had showered, put on her night gown, and had brushed her long, thick hair, she sat on her bed, diary and pen in hand.

Tonight, instead of reading, she decided to write. She didn't know how to begin or what to write, but decided not to ponder any longer and wrote whatever came to mind.

She started with today's date, and then, wrote a simple sentence, a total of five words: _This weekend was the happiest._

She closed the diary and left it at that, words couldn't describe how she truly felt, she just couldn't put it into words.

A few minutes later she heard a soft knock on the door.

"It's open, Natsuki" Shizuru smiled as she said this, only the blunette came to her room at this time of night.

"Hey" Natsuki said as she stepped in the room with a huge smile on her face. She closed the door behind her and walked over to the bed, hands in her robes pockets, and joined the sitting brunette. "I just wanted to wish you goodnight" She leaned downward and gave Shizuru a soft kiss on the cheek.

Shizuru giggled because of this, because of how timid and sweet Natsuki was. "Natsuki should try that kiss again, I think she missed" She raised a suggestive brow.

"You know I have horrible aim" Natsuki couldn't help and grin, refering to the prior day at the festival, how she couldn't hit one single balloon with the toy gun she was provided. It was irritating. All she could say to Shizuru was that the toy was defective.

Then, Natsuki tried again, she leaned downward and captured her lover's lips, engaging in a long, amorous kiss. Her hands went for the brunette's face, her fingers caressed her cheeks, but had to stop their kiss for she had felt her slightly jump and grimace.

"Oi, _g_ _omen_ " She said, sitting in front of Shizuru to inspect her face. The cut was still there, which Natsuki thought very odd. ... _This_ _should've healed by now_...

Emerald eyes then roamed the brunette's arm. Her scratches were still there as well. They were very small wounds, so the nanomachines should've taken care of this already.

Why were they still there? Were the nanomachines not working?

Natsuki then couldn't help and swallow. Couldn't help the fast beat of her heart against her chest. Couldn't help the sudden loss of blood that left her face. Couldn't help and worry. Just couldn't help it.

Usually, when the nanomachines stopped working, it was because of one thing. It was because the Otome had had intimate relations with someone of the opposite sex.

Shizuru went ahead and kissed the pensive blunette's forehead. "No more worrying, ne?" She whispered to her as she caressed her face, "They're just scratches, they will heal in a few days" Then dragged her in the bed, guided her to lay next to her, covering her with the comforter as well.

"Can you stay with me until I fall asleep?" Shizuru covered her lips as she let out a small yawn. She was really tired, today had been a long and exciting day.

Natsuki slowly nodded yes and then wrapped her arms around the brunette, giving her a soft kiss on her forehead.

"Goodnight, Shizuru" She had a million questions, a million possible scenarios running in her head.

First thing tomorrow, she'd have to ask Youko what the hell was going on. Ask her to go over the test results with her again. Ask her if someone had done something to Shizuru, if they had forced themselves on her. What other explanation could there be for the nanomachines to not be working?

... _I swear. If someone harmed Shizuru in anyway,_ _I'll find them, I'll find them and I'll kill them with my bare hands..._ Was the furious, angry thought in Natsuki's head.

 **\- 0 -**

* * *

 **Thanks for reading!**

 **And thanks for the Reviews/Comments**

 **"For the love of ShizNat"**


	7. Chapter 7

**In the Darkness**

 **A Mai Otome ShizNat Story**

 **Chapter 7**

"Deadly beautiful" The young man whispered while intently looking at footage from a little over two years ago.

He was looking at the tapes of when they first had captured the brunette. He was mesmerized by her, by her swift movements, her decisions, her logic.

He must've seen the footage over a hundred times already, had memorized every action she had made. It just never got old, he never got bored of seeing it. He just loved seeing her in action. She was amazing, so fascinating to watch.

When they had first captured the mysterious brunette, he could tell just by looking at her that she was special. Very special.

When he had found her trying to escape the dungeon where they were holding her prisioner, the moment her eyes settled on his, with that calm and stoic expression, he knew he was done for. Her face didn't give away anything, but he saw fury in her eyes. Felt the fury inside her.

But luckily for him she had already breathed in too much of their toxic air and had passed out just in time. If he would've gotten there a minute earlier, he wouldn't have been alive right now to tell the tale.

How she managed to escape from the cell they kept her was beyond him though. He didn't have a camera there, so he wasn't able to see.

After that happened, they decided not to leave her out of their sight. They decided to keep her in the lab with them at all times. It was the only way they could keep a close eye on her, could keep her safe. If she left the premises again, she would surely die, and it would have totally ruined their plans.

 **~ Flashback ~**

 **27 Months Ago…**

Ruby eyes were softly closed, pretending to be asleep.

She was listening, listening to the guard's retreating, heavy steps. Waiting for those steps to be a little further away, just a little further so that she could continue working on loosening one of the iron bars of her prison cell.

She had woken up a few hours ago in this godforsaken place. She didn't know where she was yet, or who was keeping her captive. They had yet to come forward, had yet to introduce themselves. … _Such bad manners_ … But she also didn't want to stick around to find out. She wanted to be out of there as soon as possible. She had a bad feeling about this place.

So, she wasted no time. The instant she woke up she tried to contact Youko by using her Gem, but it didn't work. She tried to Materialize as well and found out that she couldn't, something was preventing her from doing so, she wasn't sure what that something was yet.

Ruby eyes then carefully searched the tight, small cell. She noticed there were no windows and no furniture in the cell. The air she was breathing lacked oxygen. She could breathe but not enough was getting in. And by the texture of the walls, by how moist the muddy wall was when she touched it, how muggy the atmosphere felt, she could tell she was underground.

She then quickly kneeled by the entrance of the cell, near the door. Not a sound could be heard left or right. It was too quiet, eerily quiet. Either she was the only prisoner on this floor, or they kept everyone far apart.

She touched the iron bars one by one, wriggling each one a little to see which one she could work on, which one was the loosest one. This place was very outdated, it looked like it had seen better days, getting out of there would be no problem for her.

When she found the loosest bar, she started to wiggle and twist, wiggle and twist, wiggle and twist, only stopping when she felt the guards approaching again.

Every time she heard the guard approach, she would immediately stop, then quietly crawl back to the opposite side of the wall where they had left her, and she would sit. She would sit there in the same position as before, would close her eyes again, and then would wait until the guard was gone. He would stop there for a long moment and stare at her, and then he would move on.

She knew approximately how long it would take him to head back around. Every ten to fifteen minutes he would show up from the same direction, show up from the left side, so she guessed he was walking around in a circle.

When she had finally managed to loosen one of the bars, she left it in place and quickly worked on the next one. She only needed to remove two, she'd have enough space to wriggle her way out then.

It took some time, but she was finally free to make her next move. She waited for the guard to come by again. And when he did, she waited approximately ten seconds for him to be a little far ahead, that way, she could remove the bars and move undetected.

When she left the cell, she took one of the bars with her for protection. She had plenty of training fighting with a metal stick during her Coral years, so this one would do a lot of damage, would work perfectly fine.

She carefully walked around the dungeon, trying to keep hidden from the cameras for as long as she could.

The guard that kept checking up on her was her first casualty. She hit him hard on the back of his head, searched him, and found that he had no weapons.

… _Ara, coincidence?_... She couldn't help and think. Perhaps her captor knew she'd try to break out and didn't want her to get her hands on anything that could potentially kill him. So her captor must've kept this guard unarmed.

She hid the guard on a corner and then kept quietly walking. This place was big, felt like a maze. A badly lit maze. It was too dark for her to see, and the further from her cell she walked, the colder it got, and the harder it became to breathe.

About twenty minutes in from the moment she had broken out of her cell, she heard the alarm. She moved with a little more haste then, wanting to find cover.

"Stop right there!"

Someone had spotted her and ran towards her direction. She stood there and smiled at him with both hands behind her back, completely hiding the bar. When he got close enough,

BAM!

Down he went. She had quickly spun around and swung the iron bar, hitting him hard and fast across the cheek, and then quickly spun and swung again, ducking and hitting his leg,

"Ugh!"

Making him fall to the ground.

" _Kannin na_ " She apologized as she stood and then quickly left.

There was no time to search her second casualty, she could hear a lot more steps approaching.

She quickly yet silently ran, and when she found the nearest wall, she hid behind it, instantly kneeling. She closed her eyes to be able to focus, to listen better, it was too dark to see anyway.

She also tried to calm her breathing. She couldn't understand why the guards seemed to have no difficulties breathing and she did. … _Perhaps they're trained to breathe down here_ … She reasoned. … _I need to head to the surface, I will eventually suffocate and pass out_ … The way things were going, she wasn't going to last long.

She heard hasty steps nearing again. She prepared. By the steps, it sounded like she needed to fight two guards this time, perhaps three.

She gripped the iron bar, this thing was a lot more useful than she thought. She got ready to swing hard and at least knock one of them out by surprise,

POW!

"Ah!" Down went the third guard.

"N-No... W-Wait!..."

BAM!

"Ugh~" Down went the fourth one.

"Don't move!"

Shouted the remaining one.

"Drop the stick, sweetheart"

She quickly eyed him, analyzed his weak stance. Noticed his shaky hand. "Ara~ Sweetheart?" But instead of dropping the stick, "As you wish" She slowly tossed it towards him, totally surprising him.

His immediate instinct was to catch it. When he lost focus, that's when she lunged at him and quickly disarmed him.

"Not a single movement from you" Kyoto-ben calmly let out. She had disarmed him and was now pointing his own gun at him, "I would like that back" Then grabbed the bar from his shaky hand. "Would you be so kind as to direct me towards the exit?" She'd been in this place far too long. She'd like to go home now. Go home to Natsuki.

When he said nothing, "Slowly point the way" She asked again, pleasantness gone this time. And when she saw him raise his hand, "I must warn you" She softly menaced, "If you lie to me, I will come back for you. I'm afraid our next meeting won't be so pleasant"

The guard gulped and then pointed to a different direction, pointed south.

" _Ookini_ " Shizuru smiled and took a step back. She slowly tossed the gun at him and quickly shifted her stick to her right hand, then swung at his face, definitely leaving a scar. "Sweetheart" It was lights out for guard number five.

She took the gun back and headed towards the direction he had pointed. She walked carefully, kneeling and ducking every few turns, avoiding as many guards as possible.

She confronted three more guards along the way but she didn't use the gun on them. She didn't know how loud it would be, she'd never seen this kind of weapon before, and she didn't want any more attention coming her direction. Especially since she was starting to become a little disoriented, not enough oxygen getting to her lungs.

When she finally found the exit, or at least one possible exit, there was a guard standing right in front of it.

She took a deep breath and quickly ran his direction, startling him.

She quickly swung the iron bar against his hand, disarming him, and instantly pressed the bar with force against his neck, now using both of her hands, pinning him to the door. It didn't take long for him to run out of air and pass out. Guard number nine was down.

Once the door was free, she had to think about it twice before opening it. It was an Airlock type of door. And it was labelled in bold, yellow letters, 'Caution – Surface' and below it, 'Do Not Open'

Shizuru went ahead and turned the lock until it clicked.

\- Click -

Then, she pulled it open. On the other side, she found stairs.

She looked up. It was a long way up to the surface, so she said goodbye to her stick, leaving it there on the floor, and went ahead and started climbing.

… _If I make it out of this alive, I will ask Natsuki to marry me once and for all…_ Shizuru dizzily thought as she climbed the stairs, she was running out of air. Was having a hard time breathing. _…If she says no, then she says no. At least I'll know…_

She had bought the engagement ring six months ago, but decided to wait since things started to become a little complicated between them. She thought that by now, by their third year together as a couple, Natsuki would've made their relationship public. Or at least would say the three words. But neither has happened yet. And as time passed, she was getting quite disillusioned with her. She loved her, and she wouldn't leave her, but she did want more from her. Expected more out of their relationship.

When Shizuru finally made it to the top, tired and faintly breathing, needing air, she had another Airlock door left to open. She felt like she had no strength left to rotate the lock, but she did. Somehow, through her dizziness, she did.

She pushed it open, and when she finished climbing the extra steps and made it outside, her right hand instantly covered her nose and mouth. It was very windy, very cold, and there was a lot of sand.

She daren't breathe. She couldn't breathe. Wherever she was, there was no oxygen. And now she understood why she couldn't reach Youko, now she understood why she couldn't Materialize. Why she couldn't breathe. This world wasn't Earl. She was no longer in Earl, and this world had no breathable air.

Shizuru held her breath and looked up. _…If only you could see this, Natsuki…_ It was beautiful, sad, and tragic at the same time. This world had three moons, but one of them was shattered in pieces. It was totally destroyed. She felt like she had woken up in some sort of twisted, fairytale world.

Shizuru looked at her surroundings one more time before heading down. Miles and miles and miles of sand anywhere the eye could reach. There was no way she would survive out here. She wouldn't make it far, it was too windy, too cold, it was night time, and she couldn't even breathe.

She went ahead and entered the hole she came out of again, closing the Airlock on top of her. She couldn't help and cough as she rapidly went down. The air outside, Shizuru was beginning to think, was poisonous.

When she reached the ground, she went to grab the bar but it was not where she had left it.

"Looking for this?"

A soft voice said. It startled her, but she didn't show it, she didn't flinch.

"You took out nine of my men with this silly thing"

She turned around and looked at the young man. He was pointing a gun at her.

"You're amazing… Deadly beautiful I must say" And then, "What is your name?"

Shizuru said nothing. She was mute. Everything was starting to spin around her yet she showed no sign of discomfort. She didn't waiver for a second.

She waited for him to come closer, maybe then she could disarm him.

"Who, may I ask, is Natsuki?"

Shizuru's hand slightly twitched when the blunette's name left his lips.

"You called the name many times while unconscious. The person must be important to you"

Not a word from the brunette. Not a single word. Only a stare.

"Could she be family? Could he be a lover?" The name was unisex so he had to be vague.

Shizuru felt herself leaving, her chest was now hurting. The pain was too much to bare, to mask.

She took a shaky step forward and he took a step back. And before she knew it, she had hit the ground and everything around her went dark.

 **~ End Flashback ~**

"Looking at those tapes again, son?" The father said once he had entered the lab.

"It's only for research" The young man replied and quickly turned the apparatus off.

The man looked at him suspiciously. He was beginning to think his son was becoming obsessed with the brunette. He was showing too much interest in her. "How are you feeling today?"

"Unfortunately, still weak"

The blunette had startled him last time he was _in the dark_ , so he had disconnected, un-linked improperly, which drained most of his energy. It was dangerous to disconnect that way, to disconnect so suddenly. The mind could get lost in there and never return to ones body again. "I hope this companion of hers doesn't start to become a problem"

"Perhaps it's a one-time thing" The older of the two suggested. He looked up at the screen, looking at the brunette's brain activity. Her memories were now at fifteen percent. "She's recovering faster than we thought" He noticed, "But we still have plenty of time... Rest for a few days, son. If her companion is still with her, we don't want her to become suspicious"

"Okay" The son answered. He was holding onto the iron bar the brunette had fought with that day they captured her. A memento he kept of the day they met.

 **Same Time, Planet Earl**

 **Garderobe**

"Okay, Shizuru-san, this is how this machine works…" Youko explained to the brunette who stood next to her wearing a silky, short, white robe.

Youko, Shizuru, and Natsuki were in the lab, standing in front of a metal, bulky, chrome colored bed. To Shizuru, it looked like a capsule of some sort. Looked like a silver egg. A silver egg with a fluffy bed inside of it.

"First, you will remove your robe and lay down on the bed" The woman softly explained, patting down on the mattress, "Then, once you're settled, I will press a few buttons and this glass will move towards you and will completely cover the bed. You'll be completely sealed inside"

When Shizuru warily nodded, her right hand slowly rubbing her chest, she kept on:

"You will see white smoke" She then chose another word, smoke sounded a little dangerous, "You'll see vapor, white vapor coming out of the vent, those little holes you see there…" She pointed to mentioned holes, "It will completely surround you, and you will be able to hear what's going on outside, but you won't be able to see us"

Shizuru nodded again, "Do I have to do anything?"

The woman smiled and shook her head. "No. All you have to do is lay there. You don't have to do anything else, just lay back and relax"

Shizuru thought for a few seconds, her hand now resting on her chest, totally still, "How long will I be in there?"

"You'll be in there for about twenty minutes" Youko answered, then added, "The vapor you'll inhale will enter your bloodstream through your lungs and will work on healing your wounds. When you come out, you'll be brand new, not a scar, not a scratch on that pretty skin of yours. And it will also take care of that fever you developed overnight, along with any bacteria that might've entered your body through the cuts"

" _Hai…_ I see" Shizuru softly nodded in understanding again.

She was glad that Natsuki had talked to Youko regarding her uneasiness about taking more tests and being around lab equipment. Especially needles. She really didn't like needles.

Youko was going to inject antibiotics into her veins to instantly cure her, but since she had a choice, had a say in what could or could not be done to her, she had said no and had asked for an alternative. An alternative that didn't include needles. That is why they were standing in front of this machine right now, because she had profusely said _'ie'_ to the needles.

And at least now Youko was being more considerate and explained everything to her so that she knew exactly what was going on, understand what was being done to her. Before, she didn't. She just did as she pleased without muttering a single word.

"Whenever you're ready we'll get started, okay?"

Shizuru softly smiled at Youko, " _Ookini_ " her cheeks tinted pink because of the high fever, "Can I have a few minutes alone with this machine?"

"O… Okay" Youko said, slightly surprised by the request. "We'll be over there, call us when you're ready" And before she started to walk away, "Ahem" She cleared her throat, motioning for the blunette to follow her as well. Shizuru wanted to be left alone. Completely alone.

"Oh, right" Natsuki then took a step closer to Shizuru, a hand on her shoulder. "Don't worry, Shizuru, it's perfectly safe, okay?"

When Shizuru nodded, they walked away, walked towards the other side of the room. That's where the control panels to the machine were.

They stared at Shizuru from afar. Stared as she cautiously walked around the machine, stared as she touched the surfaces. Watched as she bent on her knees and saw what was underneath it. Watched as she touched the inside of the bed, as she pushed down on the mattress, then walked around it and tapped on the thick glass.

"What are you thinking right now?" Youko whispered to the pensive blunette. Natsuki was standing next to her, an arm folded below her chest, the other hand lightly touching her chin, her usual thinking pose.

"Honestly, I don't know what to think… I'm not thinking at all right now" Was all Natsuki could say.

She stared at Shizuru in silence for a few moments, and then continued, "Are you sure the tests are right, that there were no signs of…" She couldn't even finish the sentence, say the word. Couldn't even think about it.

She had stayed up all night with the sleeping brunette in her arms, hoping for the best yet thinking the worst. She would normally pace, standing still in situations like this didn't help her think, but she didn't want to leave the brunette's side, not for a second.

As soon as she saw the sunrise, as soon as she noticed the hint of light peaking in through Shizuru's window, she left the sleeping woman and headed for Youko's bedroom to wake her up. It was still very early, not even six a.m. yet, but she needed to know what Youko had found out very thoroughly. Needed to know in detail. Wanted her to tell her everything all over again, to start from the very beginning again.

Youko recapped everything to Natsuki one more time. She had sat her down and told her that she had conducted all the necessary tests the night Natsuki had brought Shizuru in from the desert. Her blood tests showed that she still had the nanomachines in her system. And when she conducted the physical exam, her body showed no signs of abuse, there was not a scratch, not a scar, not a bruise on the brunette.

Because of this, Youko didn't think of conducting a nanomachine count, that's the only test she didn't perform that night. The brunette seemed perfectly unharmed.

And luckily, she still had blood samples from that night, so she was able to run further tests on Shizuru's blood this very morning. When the results came back, it was alarming what she had found.

She found that ninety five percent of the nanomachines weren't there, Shizuru had lost them somehow. They weren't in her blood, they were missing. That was the reason she wasn't properly healing.

Youko came to the conclusion that either Shizuru was badly injured at some point and had lost a lot of blood, or worse, someone had tampered with her blood.

And since there was absolutely no information on Shizuru's whereabouts, Youko didn't know herself what to think, what to believe. All she could hope for was that Shizuru would remember soon, would be able to tell them something soon. This mystery was making her lose sleep.

And when she analyzed Shizuru's clothing, she didn't find anything out of the ordinary, not a single speck of dust, not a single foreign or unknown particle, nothing besides sand. Besides sand, her clothes were squeaky clean. Too clean. And it didn't have a single tare, it didn't look like she had been wearing it for the past two years.

And the more the time passes, the less explanations she finds. Things just kept getting weirder and weirder, going from bad to worse.

"Don't worry, Natsuki, Shizuru-san is alright. She wasn't harmed in that way" Youko reassured the Headmistress for the hundredth time that day.

"She might not remember it at the moment, but being an Otome was important to her, Youko... She lost two years of her life, she lost her memories, she lost a part of her identity, she can't lose that as well. She can't lose being an Otome"

"I understand" Was all Youko could respond.

"Youko-san?" Shizuru called out, gaining both women's attention. "I'm ready to begin"

"Great!" Youko shouted, then asked the blunette, "I'll get things started here, can you set her up?"

Natsuki nodded, then headed towards her lover. Once she got there she smiled at her, letting her know not to worry, that she'll be okay. That she won't leave her side throughout the whole process.

"Shizuru, I need to remove your robe" Natsuki softly told her, looking her in the eyes while untying the silky strap around her waist for her. When she untied it, she went ahead and gently removed the robe for her, leaving her in her undergarments.

Natsuki couldn't help and swallow, unable to stop her stare. Shizuru was wearing sexy underwear at the moment, very sexy underwear. A white, matching panty and bra set that she had bought for her when she had gone back to visit her family a few years ago. A souvenir from her homeland. They had the finest cotton in the planet.

The more Natsuki thought about it, the more she thought she had a lingerie problem. All she ever bought Shizuru since they became a couple was lingerie.

Always lingerie.

Lingerie with a sexy, matching robe.

"Does Natsuki like?" Shizuru couldn't help and smirk because of Natsuki's reaction, an eyebrow raised.

"Natsuki loves..." The blushing blunette whispered. "Natsuki really, really loves" She had to remind herself that they weren't in neither of their bedrooms, and that Youko was standing not too far away, staring at them. So, before Shizuru could reach out and hold her hand, she reluctantly took a step back, placing some distance between them.

"N-Not here, Shizuru... Please" Natsuki muttered, a rush of more blood going straight to her cheeks, and also hoping that Shizuru didn't take it the wrong way. Didn't take the wrong way the fact that she didn't hold her hand. She hadn't talked to her about the issues she had displaying public affection yet. Or the fact that their relationship was not public, not yet.

They had been at the cabin the whole weekend, where no one could see them, where she could be herself. Now they were at Garderobe, things in Garderobe were a little different. Shizuru didn't know that though.

But Natsuki was trying to change. She really was. It was just taking her a lot of time. More time than she thought.

"Can, um… Can you please lay on the bed?" Natsuki softly asked, unable to stare at the brunette in the eyes.

" _Hai_ " Shizuru slightly frowned and did as told, unsure why the blunette was being distant. She gently lay on the bed, "No sheets?" Then asked, feeling a little exposed.

" _Ie_ , the vapor needs contact with the skin as well, it'll heal you faster" Natsuki answered.

"Are you ready, Shizuru-san?" Youko shouted from a distance.

Shizuru bit her lip, feeling a little nervous. She nodded to Natsuki nevertheless, letting her know that she was ready.

"She's ready!" Natsuki then shouted, giving her attention to Youko.

Youko then went ahead and pressed a few buttons here and there, turning on the machine and starting the healing process.

"I'm not moving from this spot, okay?" Natsuki reassured the brunette.

And Shizuru, she stared at Natsuki the whole time. Being around her usually calmed her, soothed her, but for some reason she was feeling anything but those things right now.

She then heard a small, robotic noise, and Ruby eyes averted to curiously search where the noise was coming from. It was the glass that was starting to move in, just like Youko had explained earlier.

Shizuru slightly opened her mouth, now using it to slowly breathe in and out, trying to calm her nerves. She didn't' know why she felt so nervous, so anxious. And as she watched the glass coming near her, as she watched it totally surround her, as she watched it entrap her, she swallowed, tightly shutting her eyes closed.

And she could somehow feel it again, feel the coldness, hear the whispers, see the darkness.

" _Deadly beautiful"_

Natsuki, on the other hand, watched as Shizuru's body language totally changed in a matter of seconds.

" _Cho…_ _Chotto matte_ , Youko" She muttered as her eyebrows furrowed in confusion, but it wasn't loud enough for Youko to hear, to stop the machine.

Emerald eyes watched as Shizuru's lips and hands started to lightly tremble, as she took deep breaths in and deep breaths out, and then she saw as a tear escaped her eye, as the tear caressed her cheek.

Was Shizuru... crying?

Why was Shizuru crying?

Shizuru was a strong woman, a physically and mentally strong woman. The strongest woman Natsuki had ever met. She had seen this woman's vulnerable side before, she had, but only as much as Shizuru had let her see. She had never seen her like this, though. Never like this. Shizuru seemed the total opposite of the poised, confident woman she normally was. She seemed so small, so weak, so frightened. She seemed broken, torn apart.

"Stop… Stop, stop, stop! Youko, open this damn thing!" Natsuki hastily shouted this time. And in ten seconds tops the thick glass had fully opened again and she had full access to the trembling brunette.

Natsuki wasted no time and sat on the bed, sat by Shizuru's side. "What's wrong, Shizuru?" She quickly asked her as she desperately caressed her feverish face, wiping her tears away. "Talk to me"

"I-I don't know" Shizuru replied through trembling lips, not daring to open her eyes. She couldn't exactly explain it, explain how she felt, "I… I think they're watching"

"W… Who? Who's watching?" Came the wary question, the wary whisper.

"I don't know" Was the honest answer. "I-I'm scared, Natsuki"

And although she didn't show it, Natsuki was scared as well.

"W-What's wrong with me? W-Why can't I remember anything?"

But Natsuki didn't have an answer to that.

And after a short moment of silence, "Nothing's wrong with you, you're perfectly fine" Natsuki then tried to calm the anxious woman. "Don't be scared, Shizuru. Look at me, I'm right here. You're not alone" She grabbed the brunette's right hand and brought it to her chest.

Ruby, teary eyes then opened to stare at worried Emeralds ones. She slowly brought her other hand up, and with her fingers she caressed the bridge of Natsuki's nose, her way of telling her not worry.

And after a long moment of staring she once again closed her eyes, for Natsuki had leaned downwards and had given her a soft, lingering kiss on the lips, soon after, whispering:

"Shizuru, you don't have to do this-"

"I-I want to" Shizuru quickly interrupted, weakly smiling. "I'd like to get better sooner and go back to class" If they took the traditional route, the taking pills route, it would take too long. She didn't want to be stuck in her room, in her bed, all day long for who knows how long. And her fever wasn't helping, it made her feel worse. She needed to do this. Needed to heal.

"Okay" Natsuki gave Shizuru another long kiss on the lips. She didn't care who was watching anymore or what they thought, all she cared about was that Shizuru felt safe, that she felt secure.

"I'll be right back, okay? I'll only be gone for a second" And when she felt Shizuru's head nodding against hers, she reluctantly detached herself from her.

"Is everything okay, Natsuki?" Youko softly asked the approaching woman after watching the whole exchange. It was heartbreaking to see Shizuru that way.

Natsuki frowned, then asked, "Would it be okay if I went in the chamber with her?" And added, "It wouldn't interrupt her treatment, would it?"

"No, it wouldn't" Youko smiled at this, at Natsuki's attentiveness, her determination to do her best to comfort the woman she loves. "But you have to strip down, we don't want your clothes to absorb all the good stuff"

Natsuki blushed because of this, "Okay" And then walked back the twenty steps, walked back to where the brunette lay.

Once Natsuki arrived there, she removed her long, blue jacket and neatly placed it on the table next to the bed. Then, removed her navy, flat shoes.

"What is Natsuki doing?" Shizuru asked with a frown, propping herself up by her elbows. It seemed like the woman was stripping down.

But why?

"What does it look like I'm doing? I'm coming in with you" After she had removed her flats and neatly set them aside, she proceeded to remove her pants.

" _Fufu_ , if that's the case, I want to help Natsuki get rid of some of her clothes" Shizuru raised to a sitting position and helped Natsuki with her white top, and finally, her tie. Leaving Natsuki in her sexy undergarments as well.

"Okay, move over" When Shizuru did, Natsuki lay next to her, facing her. "And please behave. Keep your hands where I can see them at all times" She couldn't help and add with suspicious, narrowed eyes.

Shizuru giggled, laying on her side as well. " _Ara~_ I always behave" Her index finger then touched the blunette's side, tickling her waist.

"S-Shizuru!" Natsuki scolded her. "What did I just say to you?! Hands off!"

"Any time today, girls. I have work to do!" Youko shouted from a distance.

Natsuki sighed, "Are you ready, Shizuru?"

Shizuru softly smiled, then nodded. When Natsuki gave Youko the signal to start, she added, " _Ookini_ , Natsuki. You didn't have to do this"

"I do, Shizuru. I'd do anything for you" Natsuki smiled back, her thumb lightly caressing the woman's warm lips. They looked even redder, even plumper, even more desirable because of her fever. She really wanted to kiss her but held on a little longer. Just a little longer. Soon the vapor would start and they wouldn't be seen. She could kiss her all she wanted then.

Shizuru then closed her eyes again, hearing the noise of the glass closing again.

She let out a deep breath. She wasn't sure if it was her anxiety that was making her hear things, hear things that weren't there. Hear sounds and voices of people that weren't presently in the room, that she couldn't recognize, that she had never met before.

" _In the darkness, find the source"_

"Shizuru, open your eyes"

And Shizuru reluctantly did.

"Look at me, I'm right here" She continued to softly caress her face, "You're safe, you're with me"

"I'm safe" Shizuru repeated letting out a deep breath, "I'm with Natsuki" Then rested her forehead against the blunette's.

"Okay, the vapor will start now, you will hear a sound so don't get scared"

And as if on cue, there the sound was. It sounded like buzzing, perhaps a fan.

Shizuru could see the vapor surrounding them now, she could see the vapor obstructing her view. Natsuki's face, Natsuki's green eyes, even though she was right there in front of her, she couldn't see her anymore. She was fuzzy, almost disappearing. Disappearing.

Disappearing…

" _Youko… Please take care of Natsuki"_

"Don't be scared, Shizuru, it's only air" Natsuki said, feeling the tremor on the brunette's cheek. "It won't hurt you, just slowly breathe it in" She took a deep breath in, then out, showing her, "See? Try it"

Shizuru could barely see her, but she could hear her, feel her. She could feel her warm hand caressing her cheek. Could feel her slowly moving, shifting, now laying on top of her. Could feel her weight on her, and it felt good. The pressure, the touch, the constriction, it felt good. It kept her centered, kept her calm.

"Mmm… Now what?" Shizuru then whispered, arousal slowly taking over now. She felt Natsuki's lips so close to hers, her breath tickling her lips, she felt her hand on her hip, squeezing her there.

"Now I have twenty minutes to keep you distracted… I-I mean, calm. Keep you calm"

Shizuru giggled as she wrapped her arms around Natsuki's neck, pulling her face down a little closer. Totally loving the sound of what she had just said.

"But you have to keep very quiet" Came the husky whisper. "I don't want Youko to hear us"

" _Ara_ ~ And you acuse me of misbehaving?"

"Don't be a pervert, Shizuru!" But she had said it too loud. Too loud. She cleared her throat and then whispered, "No funny business, I'm only going to kiss you. So keep your hands right where they are"

And then she felt Natsuki's nose touching hers, and then her lips on hers, softly kissing her. "I love you…" She heard her huskily say when their lips parted,

"I know..."

And then Natsuki dived in again. Kissing her again, but with a little more passion, more feeling this time.

They were in this bubble, this happy bubble, and they couldn't be seen, but they could be heard. They had forgotten that they could be heard.

Meanwhile, Youko left the lab to give the two women some privacy. Whatever was happening in there, it sounded like a little more than Natsuki had said. Sounded like a little more than kissing to her.

And fifteen minutes later, Nao and Arika walked in. And since they didn't find Youko, Natsuki or Shizuru there, they were about to take their leave.

\- Beep - Beep – Beeeeeep -

"Oh, the healing chamber is on" But Nao stopped on her tracks, for she had heard the chamber suddenly beep three times, which meant the machine was about to turn off, the healing process was done.

She walked over to the chamber to see who was in there, the white vapor was starting to disappear.

"H-Holy ShizNat?!" And had to take a few quick steps back, totally not expecting what she had seen inside.

Natsuki and Shizuru, they were in the middle of a make out session, a sexy and very heavy make out session, and it looked like Shizuru was the one in control, the one on top.

And it didn't look like she was wearing a bra.

"Is that Shizuru _Onee-sama_?"

"A-Arika, turn around!" Nao quickly hissed at her, instructed, and quickly jogged to her side.

"Why is the _Gaukenchou_ in there? Is she helping Shizuru _Onee-sama_ heal?"

... _Yea, s_ _omething like that_... Nao thought with narrowed eyes, ... _Sexual healing_... Unable to unsee what she had just seen. That image will forever be engraved in her head.

Arika was probably the only person in Garderobe who was oblivious, totally deaf and blind to the rumors of her beloved _Onee-sama_ and the _Gakuenchou_ being a couple. She had been oblivious for years. She thought that they were best friends. The bestest friends in the whole wide universe.

She's such a sweet and innocent girl.

"It's an adult mood, Arika... Let's go before they see us" Nao quickly walked out of the room, pushing a curious Arika in front of her who kept looking back.

"You can ask the Headmistress about what you saw here later, but don't do it without me... I want to be there, deal?" Nao smirked, she was going to have a lot of fun with this, she would tease the Headmistress about it for days to come.

 **\- 0 -**

* * *

 **Thanks for Reading!**

 **And Thanks for the Reviews/Comments**

 **I think this is one of my favorite chapters. I love Shizuru in action... POW!**

 **Let me know what you guys think, thanks!**

 **"For the love of ShizNat"**


	8. Chapter 8

**In the Darkness**

 **A Mai Otome ShizNat Story**

 **Chapter 8**

Natsuki smiled as she walked the Academy's empty, quiet halls with both hands folded behind her back. It was still morning, about to be eleven in a few minutes, and classes were in session.

She was heading for Shizuru's class. If she was right, Shizuru should be in Earl History with Miss Maria this period.

The blunette wanted to pick her up before the bell rang so that she could hold her hand for at least a few seconds before the halls got infested with squealing, teenage girls. And if Shizuru had a class afterwards, then she'd walk her there as well and talk to her for a little while.

Natsuki was very busy today and couldn't spend time with her. She was busy reviewing the proposal she'd be presenting to the Council tomorrow morning in the Republic of Aries. The proposal regarding limiting the number of Otomes each Nation will be allowed to have under the revised Otome Law.

She wanted to start working towards this as soon as possible. It was something she deeply desired; for the Nations to someday not need Otomes anymore. She knew change wasn't going to occur overnight, and that many Nations would probably oppose her proposal. But at least talking about having a limit was a step in the right direction. Some Nations, _wealthy_ Nations, had way too many Otomes, giving them a great advantage if they ever went to war. She really wanted to change that.

Since she had woken up extra early this morning to work on this, she didn't stop by Shizuru's quarters to say hello. It had been too early and she didn't want to wake her up. And she couldn't join her for breakfast either, she had a conference call then and couldn't get off the phone.

She also had some news to tell her, something she wanted to run by her. The sooner she did, the sooner they both could make the necessary arrangements.

Shizuru usually created her own schedule, she decided which classes she wanted to observe. Natsuki noticed that besides the basic Otome classes, which Shizuru had stopped attending last week, she usually attended History, Physics, Political Science and Science. Those were Shizuru's main interests. Some of the other classes varied from week to week, but these ones remained constant.

When Natsuki arrived at the classroom, she silently stood by the rear door knowing that Shizuru usually sat all the way in the back row. She was only there to observe, to listen, and to take notes if she wanted, not to disturb. Occasionally, Miss Maria did call on her to hear her opinion on certain topics, but that was rare.

Natsuki happily watched as Shizuru intently stared ahead and then wrote something on her notepad. Saw as she gently tapped her chin with the pencil, seemingly deep in thought, and then wrote some more notes down.

She looked so cute when she was focusing, so cute when serious, Natsuki thought.

Then, green eyes noticed how those lips curved upwards and smiled as she wrote something else down near the edge of the page. It made Natsuki wonder what Shizuru was thinking about right now, what she was writing down. What had caused her to suddenly smile that way.

Natsuki lightly tapped on the glass part of the door, wanting to gain Shizuru's attention. When she had looked up at the white, round clock, she had noticed she had about five more minutes until the period ended.

\- Tap -

\- Tap -

Shizuru turned her head towards the faint, tapping sound. She smiled even wider, seeing a waiving Natsuki on the other side of the door, then waiving her over. She was just thinking about her a second ago.

She quietly gathered her belongings and stood. She didn't have much with her, just a notepad, a mechanical pencil, and a bottle of water. She discreetly made her way out and gently closed the door behind her.

" _Ara~_ This is a wonderful surprise" Kyoto-ben whispered as she held her notepad against her chest. It was very quiet, and if she talked in her normal voice she would disrupt Miss Maria's lecture. "I missed you this morning, Natsuki"

Natsuki took a step closer and whispered back: "I missed you too…" Then added, "How, um, how are you feeling today?"

Emerald eyes looked to her left and then her right, making sure they were completely alone. Then, she went ahead and grabbed Shizuru's soft hand, her thumb caressing her knuckles. "The fever hasn't returned?" She was concerned about her health.

" _Ie_ , I'm feeling great" Shizuru leaned against the white wall behind her, next to the door.

She really meant it, she felt so energized, so rested, she hadn't felt this good in weeks. It was the first time in a while that she had woken up without feeling the aching throb in her legs. She felt nice, felt so refreshed.

"Natsuki has magic healing powers, she should use them on me more often" Came the playful whisper.

And Natsuki's face turned a hint of pink. " _B-Baka_ , I have no such thing" She knew Shizuru was just teasing her.

Things had gotten a little out of hand in the healing chamber yesterday. The kissing had turned into a lot more than kissing, she was glad that no one had walked in on them while in the act. That would've been totally embarrassing, and very hard to explain since supposedly they weren't in a relationship.

"You really have to take care of yourself, Shizuru" Natsuki then added with a little more seriousness. "Without the Nanomachines, you're vulnerable to all types of illnesses, your exposed to getting sick easier"

She just wished Shizuru would listen to her and let Youko inject the Nanomachines in her system again. But Shizuru refuses to be anywhere near a needle, and there was no other way of administering them. Shizuru had never been uncomfortable around needles before, not even when she had first woken up, she doesn't understand why the discomfort now. Why the hesitance.

"Don't worry, Youko-san gave me multivitamins to take in the meantime" Shizuru pulled her closer, noses almost touching. Her Ruby eyes were on Natsuki's pink lips the whole time. She was about to lean forward and meet her lips, their first kiss of the day, but Natsuki took a sudden step back.

"N-Not here, Shizuru" Natsuki timidly said and let go of the brunette's hand, placing some distance between them.

It had been a very long time since Shizuru had done that, since she had tried to kiss her, to hug her, or even hold her hand outside the comfort of their quarters. And Natsuki knew why Shizuru had stopped doing those things. She did it to protect herself, to protect her heart, to protect herself from feeling how she must be feeling now.

Natsuki daren't look up and look her in the eyes, she knew what she'd find there. She would find that look, that wounded expression, the look of rejection in her pretty, exotic face. That look really didn't suit Shizuru. It didn't belong there.

"I-It's just…" Natsuki began to explain but didn't know how to express herself. She hated doing this to her, hated making her feel this way. "Just not here, Shizuru. Not in public… Please try not to do that again"

" _Ha… Hai_ , I understand" Shizuru frowned and once again held her notepad against her chest, now standing up straight.

She said she understood, but she really didn't. She didn't understand why Natsuki acted this way when they weren't behind closed doors. They loved each other, didn't they? Why couldn't they express it whenever they wished? Why couldn't they show it to the world? It wasn't a big deal, it was just holding hands, it was just a kiss. Why was Natsuki overreacting about this?

"Did Natsuki need me for anything?" Shizuru then softly asked, wondering if there was any other reason Natsuki had pulled her out of class.

It seemed silly for her to do that, to come all this way just to ask her how she was feeling, especially since she knew she was very busy, that she would be leaving Wind Bloom sometime this afternoon. She didn't know where she was going yet, Natsuki hadn't mentioned. She just knew she had a summit and needed to leave the country for a few days.

" _Hai_ , I wanted to ask you something…" Natsuki finally looked up and softly met Ruby eyes. "I'm leaving for Aries this afternoon, for that summit I've been working on these past two weeks" She reminded the brunette, "I wanted to ask you if you wanted to join me, we'd be away for a few days"

Shizuru's eyebrows arched because of this, showing interest. "Aries? That's where Haruka-chan is from, right?"

Natsuki couldn't help the smirk that formed on her face, loosely folding her arms over her chest.

Haruka didn't like to be called that. Haruka-chan. She remembered vividly when the blonde had come over to visit Shizuru three weeks ago and Shizuru had happily lunged herself at her the moment she saw her, hugging her tightly and saying,

"It's such a pleasure to meet you in person, Haruka-chan!"

To which Haruka had taken a while to reply. She was rendered speechless for a good minute or two.

After the initial shock was gone, she had yelled,

" _N-Nani!?_ What are you doing! Get off me _bubuzuke_ woman!"

But Shizuru had done the total opposite. She had hugged her even tighter, smiled even wider, her cheek rubbing against Haruka's heated cheek.

"S-Stop it! Aren't you listening to me?! What's wrong with you!? How hard were you hit on the head!?"

Natsuki wished she could've taken a picture then, perhaps even a video. Maybe then Haruka would stop bringing up that annoying newspaper article. She still kept it around and rubbed it in her face whenever she could. She was sure Haruka had a room full of copies of it back in Aries.

If only she could find that room, she would light a match and accidentally trip, causing a fire…

" _Hai_ , Haruka-san is from Aries" Natsuki replied, "I'll be able to show you around tomorrow after the conference. After that, I'm heading for Duran to visit my family since it's close by" She noticed Shizuru's puzzled expression because of this, because she had said _I'm_ and not _We_.

"Natsuki is leaving me in Aries all alone?"

And then the bell rang, signaling the end of the second period.

Natsuki started walking then, walking towards the end of the hallway with Shizuru by her side, wanting to talk with more privacy.

"You won't be alone, Shizuru. Haruka-san and Yukino-san will be with you. They'll take good care of you" She softly added as they walked, "I'll only be away for two days at most. Being outside of Wind Bloom might be good for you, you used to travel to Aries often"

"Why can't I accompany Natsuki to Duran?" Shizuru said with a small frown.

"Oh…" Natsuki brought a hand to her chin, thinking about this for a moment. She had automatically assumed that Shizuru didn't want to join her.

Shizuru had gone to Duran with her a couple of times, but that was a long time ago, when they were still friends, way before they had told one another how they felt. After that second visit, Shizuru never joined her again, she just stayed in Aries or returned to Garderobe.

Natsuki wasn't a hundred percent certain, but she thought it might have something to do with her mother. The woman was a hard woman, hard as stone. She couldn't blame Shizuru for not wanting to go back, Natsuki hardly did so herself.

"I mean, if you want to you can... You just preferred not to in the past, so I assumed-"

"I'd love to go to Duran with you" Shizuru quickly said, quickly interrupted.

Natsuki smiled, "Alright, then I have some phone calls to make"

"What is the weather like in Aries and Duran?" Came the question. She needed to know what to pack and how much to pack. "And how long will we be away?"

"I say four days, five at most" Natsuki answered, "The weather there is like Wind Bloom right now. It's summer, so it's warm" And then added, "In winter though, since Duran and Aries are far up north, it gets very cold. In Duran, especially, we get a lot of snow during that time... The weather is always mild here in Wind Bloom no matter the season" The blunette added with a smile, "I like it here"

The bell chimed again, but it was a soft and short chime, signaling that the next period would begin in exactly three minutes time. It was a reminder for students to hurry to their next class.

Emerald eyes then noticed that Arika was standing not too far away, staring at them. She had a curious look on her face, as if analyzing them.

… _What's wrong with her?_ … Natsuki couldn't help and raise a curious brow herself. "Um, do you have a class next period, Shizuru?" She distractedly asked, eyes never leaving Arika's direction.

" _Fufu_ , I had Physics, but not anymore" Came the happy reply, "I have to pack!" And she grabbed Natsuki by the arm and started to drag her out of there, out of the school building.

Natsuki raised an eyebrow at Arika's direction one more time. She was still looking at them, scratching her head. She was being stalk-ish and creepy in Natsuki's opinion. Was there something she wanted to ask? What did she want?

"Oh, about that… Yukino-san usually invites us to a fancy dinner whenever we visit. You should pack something elegant for tonight" And then, added, "And please wear something a little more… reserved. No open shoulders" And added, "And please wear your hair down and try not to show your neck too much. People stare at you too much in Aries, they know who you are" And muttered, "It makes me uncomfortable"

"Uncomfortable? I think Natsuki meant to say jealous" Shizuru sing-sang, corrected the cobalt haired woman.

" _Ie_. Uncomfortable" Natsuki repeated and narrowed her eyes at her.

"They could stare all they want" Shizuru whispered close to her ear, "Natsuki is the one who holds my heart" And then added, repeating Natsuki's words from the other night, "I am hers and she is mine, right?"

And Natsuki blushed, there was a timid smile and a soft nod.

They parted ways once they arrived at the Administration building. Natsuki headed for her office, and Shizuru retreated to her quarters. They would be leaving early in the afternoon, so Shizuru had to hurry, she didn't have that much time to pack.

While Natsuki made some phone calls, letting Yukino know that Shizuru would be joining her on this trip, and also reserving the hotel they'd be staying at in Duran, Shizuru happily searched her drawers and closet for adequate clothing for the trip.

… _There is no way to pack for this trip_ … She had no idea what to pack. Natsuki didn't specifically say what they would be doing besides tonight, so she over did it a little with the packing. Instead of taking her small, beige suitcase, she opted for a much larger one.

Once she had finally packed and decided on the dress she would wear tonight, which by the way, was the total opposite of what Natsuki had asked, she went ahead and started to look for stilettos that would pair along well with it.

While searching her closet for the shoes, Ruby eyes settled on a box she had failed to notice before.

" _Ara_?" Shizuru grabbed the white shoe box from the lower, right corner of her shoe rack. She sat there on the floor and opened it, there were a few things inside.

There were a few pictures, knickknacks, some letters. Things she thought significant enough to keep, Shizuru guessed.

She looked at the pictures first. A few of them were of her and the blunette, pictures that dated back to her Pearl years. She also found a few pictures of a much younger version of herself. In some pictures she was next to a woman who looked like her, perhaps her mother. And some of what seem to be family pictures, for there was also a man in some of them.

When Shizuru had asked Natsuki a few weeks back if she had family, Natsuki had told her that her parents had died in an accident when she was about thirteen, fourteen years of age. Told her that her mother had been an Otome, a Column before she got married, the wielder of the same Gem she used now. She told her that the prior Headmistress took her in since she was already of age, and had personally paid for her education at Garderobe. Apparently, she had met Shizuru when her parents were still alive, and since Shizuru had expressed an interest in being an Otome then, she gave her a try, a chance, not wanting the girl to spend the rest of her teenage years in an orphanage since she had no family or relatives who could take care of her.

Shizuru put the pictures neatly aside on the floor. She grabbed the small stack of letters next, and an eyebrow then arched when they settled on a small, black box beneath it.

" _Ara_?" Lean, long fingers reached for it and then opened it. Her heart raised and her cheeks tinted pink once she had seen what was inside. It was an engagement ring. And it was gorgeous.

" _If I make it out of this alive, I will ask Natsuki to marry me once and for all"_

Shizuru swallowed as the words resonated in her head. There was no vision, just the words. Only words.

Why did she say that, why did she think that way?

Had she been on a mission then?

And this made her think, wonder:

Did she ask Natsuki to marry her or not? If the ring was still here, with her, if Natsuki wasn't wearing it, either she changed her mind about marrying her, or she had asked, and the woman had declined.

So, which one was it?

Shizuru instantly raised from the floor and headed towards her bed, towards the nightstand next to it. She opened the top drawer and quickly searched for the diary. The answer should be there, it should be.

It had to be.

Right?

Fingers instantly started to flip pages, Ruby eyes quickly scanning them, but she didn't know where to look or what to look for. How far ahead she should go.

She immediately stopped when she heard a few knocks on her door, totally startling her.

\- Knock -

\- Knock -

\- Knock -

"Shizuru, may I come in?"

It was Natsuki.

" _H-_ _Hai!_ Just a second!" Shizuru quickly stood from the bed and put her diary, along with the engagement ring, in her drawer, quickly closing it.

She then headed for her closet and picked up the pictures and letters from the floor, placing them inside the box. Then, she placed the box where it had previously resided, on the right, bottom corner of her closet.

Shizuru took a deep breath, trying to calm herself, her nerves, "Come in!" She shouted, and started to busy herself, started looking for the shoes she should wear tonight.

What was she wearing again? What color was her dress? She tried to remember. To think. … _Silver?_ … Yes, it was silver. A sparking silver. Surely, she was going to make heads turn with that beautiful, skintight dress.

Natsuki stepped inside the room and saw the brunette sitting on the floor, in front of her closet. She headed towards her, asking, "Are you ready?"

"Almost" Shizuru replied, but she was having a hard time focusing. She couldn't take the engagement ring out of her head.

Green eyes then settled on the luggage next to the bed, it looked like Shizuru had packed quite a lot for just a few days. "You know it's only five days, right?"

"Had Natsuki specified what we'd be doing I would've packed a little lighter" Shizuru quickly said, somewhat snapping at her.

And Natsuki couldn't help and raise an eyebrow, now staring at the moody brunette.

What did she do now? The mood swings of this woman were worse than ever.

" _Gomen_ , Shizuru. I should've talked to you ahead of time about these plans"

The truth is, originally, she wasn't going to take the brunette to Aries with her. But now things were different, she no longer felt the need to keep her distance from her. The brunette knew what they were, what they meant to one another. They were a couple again.

"Are you looking for what shoes to wear? May I make a suggestion?" She softly asked and sat on the bed, one leg crossing over the other.

Shizuru sighed, "Please, go ahead" Then said a little softer this time while closing her eyes, feeling a little guilty for having snapped at her. She hadn't meant to do that, the blunette had done nothing wrong.

"Never wear the black stilettos, those gave you a huge blister once"

Shizuru softly giggled at this and looked over her shoulder to meet with Emeralds behind her, " _Ookini_ , I'll keep that in mind" She then went ahead and grabbed the pair of shoes next to the black ones. They were dark blue, and had a hint of shine in them. They should go perfectly with her long, strapless, silver colored dress.

She then stood and headed for her luggage, placing the shoes neatly to one side. Natsuki stood from the bed and helped her close it.

"Good thing I'm an Otome, this thing weighs like two hundred pounds, Shizuru" Natsuki exaggerated, trying to lighten the mood somehow.

And Shizuru smiled at her bad jokes, "Where is Natsuki's luggage?" She noticed the blunette didn't bring anything with her to the room.

"It's already downstairs" The blunette placed both of her hands on the woman's waist and stood closer, much, much closer. She leaned forward and softly met the brunette's lips. It was just a brush of lips, a ghost of a kiss.

"I'm sorry about earlier, Shizuru" Natsuki whispered, referring to what had happened outside of Miss Maria's class. "I need you to give me some time, I'm really trying to deal with this, I'm trying to change"

Shizuru softly nodded and leaned forward for another kiss, a proper kiss. She could barely feel the blunette's lips before.

"We should go, the car is waiting for us" The blunette said once they had parted and grabbed the brunette's luggage by the handle. "I've asked the cooks to prepare a _bento_ for us to eat on the road" Since the brunette had been busy packing she doubted she ate lunch. "Do you have everything?"

" _Hai_ , I just need to grab one more thing" Shizuru went ahead and walked towards her nightstand to grab her purse. Then, she opened the drawer, and her eyes once again fell on the small box with the engagement ring inside it. She let out a deep breath, then reached for her diary and closed the drawer.

"Now I'm ready" Kyoto-ben spoke while placing the diary inside her purse, and then joined the blunette who had started walking towards the door.

She wasn't planning on taking the diary with her on this trip, she really needed a break from reading it. The things she was reading as of late weren't pleasant, it seemed like she was going through a blue stage at the time. It seemed like she had been a little down, somewhat depressed.

But finding the engagement ring changed everything, and she needed answers.

She decided she was going to start reading a little differently, start reading backwards, start with the last entry. Maybe then things would start to make some sense.

 **A Few Hours Later…**

 **Republic of Aries**

"You said wear something elegant, why aren't you wearing something elegant?" Shizuru curiously asked, observing the blunette's outfit from her sitting position on the bed.

It's not that Natsuki didn't look elegant, she did, she was just expecting her to wear a dress instead of a suit, that's all.

Natsuki was wearing something similar to her Headmistress uniform, except with a few changes. She was wearing black, high heels instead of flats, and was wearing a designer, navy, skinny suit. The shirt inside was strapless, but it was navy with small, red flowers. And her navy jacket wasn't long, it was form fitting and it hung just below her waist. She looked quite sexy, very chic Shizuru thought.

Natsuki looked at herself in the mirror, fixing her hair which was up in a high ponytail, the silver pin on the usual side. She was also contemplating. Contemplating whether she should apply color to her lips or just settle for a glossy look.

"I'm here on business" She softly answered the brunette's question, "this is as elegant as I will get. And you're here for pleasure, there's a difference"

Shizuru raised a suggestive brow, a playful smile on her lips. " _Ara~_ But for whose pleasure?"

She had to say it, just had to.

The moment they had arrived at the hotel room Natsuki had totally devoured her. The moment the door had shut behind them she had gotten rid of both of their clothes so fast; so fast that she looked like that comic book character, what was his name? The Flash?

But it wasn't all Natsuki, she also played a big part in this.

She had teased the woman relentlessly the entire way to Aries, had been very inappropriate the whole way.

Shizuru was unable to keep her hands from herself, no pun intended.

She had touched herself in the sexiest of ways. She had started by sensually touching and biting her lower lip. Ruby eyes were on the blunette in front of her the whole time as she slowly proceeded to touch her neck. Her fingertips then unbuttoned a few buttons from her shirt, showing cleavage, showing Natsuki a little bit of her lacy, sexy bra. And then provocatively, slowly touching in between that area, in between her ample bosoms, closing her Ruby eyes and letting out a throaty moan, a sexy gasp in the process.

She wanted to see Natsuki's reaction, what she would do. Wanted to see if she would grab her and take her to the restroom to make out. Shizuru really wanted to make out. They had a whole jet plane to themselves, well, besides the pilot and the flight attendant, so she wanted to have a little fun. Sexy fun.

But unfortunately, the woman didn't. Shizuru had come to learn, or re-learn, that the blunette had a lot of self-restraint. A lot. It's as if the blunette had been doing this for years; practicing self control.

Let's just say that it was a long and painful three hours in that lonely jet plane. And not only for Natsuki. Shizuru's seduction had totally backfired on her. She was hot, extremely hot, and there was no willing, icy blunette to cool her down.

"S-Shizuru~" Came the husky whine. If she blushed any deeper she was sure she was going to faint. It had been a day full of those already, she really needed a break.

" _Fufu, kannin na…_ No more teasing, I promise"

"Don't promise things you can't keep" Natsuki muttered. It was in Shizuru's nature, the woman just never, ever, ever stopped.

"You're not wearing a necklace tonight?" Shizuru then noticed as she stood from the bed and joined the woman in front of the vanity. Something seemed to be missing from the woman's outfit, she wasn't wearing jewelry at all.

"I'm so used to wearing the tie that I forgot to bring jewelry"

"That can be easily fixed" Shizuru went ahead and removed the crescent moon necklace from her neck, she wasn't planning on wearing it tonight anyway. She stood behind Natsuki and securely fastened it around her pretty neck.

"There, now you're perfect" She wrapped her hands around the blunette's waist and hugged her from behind. "You're the most beautiful woman I've ever laid eyes on... I'm so glad that you're mine" She placed a long kiss on her now blushing cheek, then stared at their reflection in the mirror for a few seconds and sweetly smiled at her.

They looked good together, Shizuru thought. Their differences complemented one another. .. _.We'll make cute babies someday_...

Natsuki then turned around and wrapped her arms around Shizuru's neck. One of her hands made its way to her chestnut hair, caressing her there. She went ahead and softly kissed her, kissed the woman she loves and adores with all her heart. Thanking her with her lips for the compliment she had given her.

"I love you, Shizuru" Then said as she parted their kiss, their noses lightly touching, playfully caressing one another.

"I… I know... Me too" Shizuru whispered back and then softly kissed her again.

\- Ring -

But they had to part their lips for the phone had started to ring.

\- Ring -

Natsuki slowly walked over to the ringing phone, " _Hai?_ " Was the husky answer, it was concierge who had called. "Yes, thank you for letting me know" Then gently hung up and faced Shizuru.

"They're early. They'll be waiting for us at the restaurant" She informed the brunette. "How much longer until you're ready?"

She was glad that the restaurant Yukino had chosen to have dinner tonight was in their hotel. She had woken up very early this morning and didn't feel like being out too long. She could just head back up to the room and rest once dinner was over.

The summit tomorrow morning would be in this hotel as well. They had a large conference room, with enough room to sit the Council members and the representatives from each of the other Nations. It was an important conference; many different countries would attend it.

"Hm, I'd say about twenty minutes?" At the moment, Shizuru was wearing the robe the hotel provided. She had already showered and applied her makeup, she just needed to do her hair, slip into her long dress and shoes, apply lipstick, and sprinkle some perfume on her skin. "You can head downstairs and keep them company, I won't take long"

"Oh, okay" Natsuki walked towards her and then placed a kiss on her clothed shoulder. "I'll order you a glass of wine while we wait... Red or white?"

"White please" Shizuru placed a chaste kiss on her lips.

"Okay, see you in a little bit" Natsuki then headed for the door, "Remember, the restaurant is on the 30th floor" She made sure she had her keycard with her before waiving goodbye and closing the door behind her.

It took her about eight minutes to reach the 30th floor since their room was all the way up in the 60s.

This was a huge, fancy, and very expensive hotel. It was also very popular due to the panorama, due to the view, this being one of the highest buildings in the city.

And there was a lot more traffic than usual tonight due to the summit tomorrow. Anyone who's anyone would be there. Anyone who was influential and had a say would be there. Natsuki was sure she was going to bump into many leaders and famous Otomes tonight.

Natsuki walked down the long, wide staircase. She had already talked to the host who had pointed her to her table. The host was going to show her there, but Natsuki had cordially denied.

This was Natsuki's first time eating in this restaurant. The restaurant was enormous, she noticed, and had high ceilings and glass walls, taking up two floors. It looked like a ballroom with the high ceiling and the massive, pretty chandelier in the middle of the room. It was also nicely, dimly lit, and soft, live, piano music was playing, a great set-up for those who are looking for romance.

The moment Emerald eyes fell upon Haruka, she couldn't help and narrow her eyes. There Haruka was, silently laughing at her again, her eyes full of mirth.

Why couldn't she just let things go? It's been four years already for crying out loud!

She slowly walked to their table. She was glad that Yukino had reserved a table near the window. Yukino knew how much Shizuru enjoyed the views. And this place had a great view.

Natsuki slightly nodded her head along the way, greeting important figures, Otomes, and ambassadors. She was right all along, anyone who was anyone was here tonight.

She stopped and chatted for a few moments with some fellow Otomes, they were concerned for Shizuru and had asked how she was doing. Natsuki brought them up to speed, but omitted a lot of details. They needn't know everything about the brunette, just that she was back, and that she was safe.

" _Konbanwa_ , sorry for the wait" Natsuki greeted Yukino and Haruka before sitting, and silently thanked the waiter who helped her with her chair. "Shizuru will be down in a few minutes"

Haruka was about to speak, but Yukino covered her mouth, knowing exactly what she was going to say.

"Not tonight, Haruka-chan. You promised"

To which Haruka had given her a look, a twitchy look.

"Yukino, don't call me that in public!" Came the muffled whine.

Natsuki went ahead and ordered two glasses of wine, one red one white. And while they waited for Shizuru, the three women conversed, mainly about the summit tomorrow.

Haruka wasn't fond of the idea of decreasing the amount of Otomes in Aries, she and Yukino seemed to have similar opinions in the matter. If they agreed to this, and one of the other wealthy Nations who didn't give up their Otomes declared war on them, they'd be exposed big time.

Everyone, absolutely everyone needed to be on the same page about this. Everyone.

"Where is that bubuzuke woman, I'm starving!" Haruka finally let out. They had been waiting for a good thirty minutes now.

"Ah, _gomen_ , let me go check on her" Natsuki then stood and headed for the nearest phone. There was one not too far way, near the foot of the stairs.

She picked it up and dialed 6620, their room number. And she heard the phone ring and ring and ring and ring. No one was answering.

And suddenly, the loud voices in the room turned into whispers and hushes, until the voices completely died and the room became silent. Too silent. When she noticed, when she looked around, everyone seemed to be staring in the same direction. Everyone, men and women alike, were completely mesmerized by something, by someone.

When Emerald eyes followed their gaze, it led her to the very top of the long set of stairs, led her to brunette.

Natsuki let out a small gasp, her mouth slightly, _just slightly_ agape. She watched as Shizuru calmly looked around, unmoving from the spot she was standing.

Shizuru was looking for her, trying to find her, she just knew it.

When their eyes finally met, when she had finally found her, she noticed she impudently smiled at her and started to make her torturous, sexy, and very slow descend.

In that moment, it was just Shizuru, her, and the song in her heart.

The rapid beat of her excited heart.

Shizuru was brilliant tonight. She was the brightest star. She looked wonderful in her strapless, long, silver dress. It had a slight split on one side of the leg, making it easier to walk while showing some of her toned leg as well. There was not a single jewel adorning her body. She didn't need it, she chose it that way. The dress itself, with its sparkles, was the jewel. She was wearing sassy, sexy, high, navy colored stilettos. They had a little bit of gloss, a little bit of shine on them. And her hair, her hair was up in a messy bun, bangs combed neatly in place, showing her beautiful face and delicate neck. Her make up was simple, but her lips were red. Passionate red, just like her mysterious eyes.

She was elegance.

She was charm.

She was provocative.

She was grace.

She was bewitching and enchanting. And not one second did her Ruby eyes leave hers. Not one. Natsuki was truly the most envied woman in the room, in the country, in world tonight. Everyone's eyes were on Shizuru, but Shizuru's attention was solely on her.

Only her.

"She's truly what they say about her" Said a voice standing next to her, a male voice. "I've never seen her in person, and now that I have, I see it is true what they say. She is as the name of her Gem… Bewitching"

Natsuki ignored the voice and stared at her, only her. She was halfway down the stairs now, that sensual walk of hers made her heart want to leave her chest. The way she was looking at her, that playful way, it took her breath away. Completely.

"One of the most desired women in the world, and she happens to be an Otome. Such a waste of beauty" The man continued, and then sighed, "There are rumors though that she is already promised to someone, yet I don't see a ring on her finger. Until then, I'd say she's fair game"

And upon hearing these words, Natsuki left her stare of the brunette for two seconds to look at the now retreating man.

Who was that guy anyway?

Natsuki slowly hung up the phone, realizing she was still holding it next to her ear. The phone had stop ringing a long time ago and was now beeping.

She slowly walked to the foot of the stairs, Emerald eyes never leaving the woman's form, and waited for her there.

"You really know how to make an entrance… Wherever you go, everyone can't stop staring at you" Natsuki whispered to her, keeping her distance.

"All I ever look for is the attention of a pair of beautiful, green eyes" Kyoto-ben softly replied, "That is always my goal"

Natsuki's cheeks turned pink and whispered again, "I… I see you went for the opposite of what I suggested"

And Shizuru's lips and eyes showed a little humor, "Natsuki knows me well, does she not? She knows I do not play by the rules… She knows I do the opposite of what she says. Natsuki wanted me dressed this way"

Natsuki swallowed, this was not the time to be turned on by the woman's seductive voice, by her intense gaze, by her playful words.

She looked around and all eyes still seem to be focused on the brunette.

"Ahem" She brought a hand to her lips and loudly cleared her throat a couple of times, "Ahem!" And everyone seemed to start moving again, to avert their stares and give them privacy.

It always worked like a charm.

"Come, Shizuru. Our table is this way"

Natsuki slowly led the brunette to their table, and Shizuru waived and said hello to a few people she didn't recognize, didn't remember. Natsuki had to whisper in her ear who they were.

When the brunette had greeted Haruka, it was exactly as last time. She had lunged at her and had hugged her, and even gave her a sweet, amiable kiss on the cheek. Natsuki couldn't catch it on camera, totally forgetting about it, but Yukino sure did.

The rest of the night went smoothly. The four women chatted and laughed, not once talking about business. A few Otomes and ambassadors did stop and greeted them throughout the night.

It was a reminiscing night. Haruka told a few stories of her and Shizuru's years together in Garderobe, exaggerating and making a few things up along the way. She was totally using Shizuru's amnesia to her advantage, to which Shizuru had said:

" _Ara~_ I sort of remember it differently, Haruka-chan"

And Haruka blushingly replied,

"W-What do you know? You have anesthesia!"

Then, Yukino corrected,

"It's amnesia, Haruka-chan"

And then Natsuki folded her arms across her chest and muttered,

"It's all written down in her journal, Haruka-san. Stop making things up, it's embarrassing"

But those years they had spent together, their friendly rivalry, Haruka couldn't deny those were the best years of their life. Those had been very exciting times for them both. A time full of new experiences and discoveries. And having one another, pushing one another's limits, in a way made them who they were today.

Without Shizuru's annoying calmness about everything, her perfect grades, and her relentless playfulness, Haruka wouldn't have been the same. And without Haruka's persistent rivalry, always pushing her to be the best, Shizuru either.

And although Haruka profusely denied it, she really did love and care for the brunette. She was her good friend, although she never really used the word friend.

About three hours later, after everyone had finished their dinner and dessert, and their plates had been cleared, Yukino and Haruka called it a night.

It was just the two of them at the table now, and they were finishing their third, maybe fourth glass of wine.

Shizuru looked around her and let out a small sigh. Everyone seemed so cozy, holding hands and looking into each other's eyes. Some were even kissing, and some were in the dance floor, openly expressing their love through dance. It was mostly couples now at the restaurant, which made sense since it was already eleven in the night.

Shizuru then averted her stare and looked at the view outside. Aries was a beautiful city. It seemed different to her, seemed more prosperous than Wind Bloom. Perhaps it was because it wasn't being run by an inexperienced, teenage queen.

Queen Mashiro was sweet and caring, and she was trying to be a good queen, really trying. But in the end, she was just a little girl in need of guidance, of help. She couldn't do it on her own.

Just like Natsuki and her so-called _issues_.

How was Natsuki even working on her issues? She had said she was trying, but how?

Was she seeking professional help?

Seeing a therapist?

What was she doing exactly?

How do you deal with these issues?

"What are you thinking about?" Natsuki blurted out. She was feeling a little tipsy because of the wine. Just a little bit. It was her fifth glass of the night.

"How long have we been together, Natsuki?" Shizuru pensively asked, not really facing the woman.

At some point she had stopped staring at the landscape and focused on the happy silhouettes reflecting on the window. She could see everyone that was behind them, she could see everything that they were doing. Could see their movements, their touches, their intimacy, their laughter. She couldn't help and envy those silhouettes.

"Um, three and a half years" Natsuki replied, holding three fingers in the air and attempting to do a half one. "No, five and a half" It was confusing, should she count the two years the brunette was missing or not? "No, three…" Should she subtract the five months they had broken up? That had been a very awkward, lonely, and painful time. "I mean, I think it's five and a half..." Yes, Natsuki was tipsy alright. "What do you think, Shizuru? How long do you think we've been together?"

Shizuru faced the blunette and stared at her face. What she had just said was a little hard to follow, and a little slurred.

Why so many different dates?

That's when Ruby eyes noticed her pink cheeks, her unusually smiling lips, her lovey-dovey eyes. Her sudden _closeness_.

" _A-Ara~_ I think Natsuki had too much to drink" Kyoto-ben muttered with raised eyebrows.

Exactly how much did Natsuki have to drink? And how did she not notice it?

It was nice to see her this way, it was nice seeing her finally loosening up. She was always so earnest, so serious. But she had a very important speech tomorrow, she shouldn't be doing this right now. She'd wake up with a major headache tomorrow, perhaps a hangover.

"I think I drank my glass and then your glass and then my glass and then your glass" Natsuki said, taking the brunette's hand and intertwining their fingers together. "Or was it your glass and then my glass… and then your glass and then... my glass?" Natsuki snorted, she was such a geek, "I honestly don't remember" She was acting too silly right now.

"Ne, Shizuru?" She then whispered close to the brunette's ear, a hand now on the brunette's lap. "Did you wear this dress so I could take it off?" Then added, "I love it on you, you look so sexy, but I really can't wait to take it off"

Shizuru's face was as pink as Natsuki's right now. " _A-Ara_ , let's go back to the room, ne?" This was too much for her, she'd never seen Natsuki like this before. "Natsuki is not thinking straight right now" "She might do something she will later regret" Shizuru then stood, and was about to help the blunette stand as well but a voice interrupted them.

"Good evening, lovely ladies"

Natsuki then stopped smiling and faced the voice. She recognized the voice. This man had talked to her a few hours ago, and she didn't like what he had said.

"Oh, were you leaving Viola-san? I was hoping to introduce myself and talk with you for a little while, and was going to ask if you'd care to dance"

" _Ie_ , she's not doing any- any introducing or any... talking or any dancing with you. Absolutely, definitely, certainly not" Natsuki told the young man in the most serious way she could despite her condition. She had said it very slowly and somewhat slurred. "She's with me… I'm her girlfriend, her- her partner. She's not fair game or whatever you said earlier, so go away" But she had to be polite, so she added, "Please"

Both, Shizuru's and the young man's eyebrows raised in surprise because of this _declaration_ of some sort.

" _Kannin na,_ but I must decline" She cordially smiled at the handsome man as she politely refused, "We were about to take our leave… Perhaps next time?"

The young ambassador softly nodded, "It was a pleasure to meet you in person, Viola-san" Then, took Shizuru's hand and gave it a gentle kiss. He was just being a gentleman.

And Natsuki, she visibly scowled because of this, her cheeks turning a deeper shade of pink. "Why are you still here. Go away please" The audacity of this guy!

"Have a good night, ladies" The ambassador smiled, "Until next time, Viola-san" And quietly took his leave.

"Yea, right. There'll be no next time" Natsuki snorted again as she watched him walk away. "Let's go to the room Shizuru, I... I don't feel so well. I feel everything spinning in my head"

" _Fufu_ , right away" Shizuru smilingly said and helped Natsuki stand. When Natsuki was jealous, it was quite comical. "Let's go" Then, she intertwined their fingers together as they slowly walked. Natsuki didn't seem to mind, she didn't retract her hand.

"Ne, Shizuru, did I tell you you look really, really, really pretty tonight?"

Shizuru giggled, pulling the girl closer as they walked, " _Hai_ , Natsuki already did"

"Oh…" There was a small frown, and a finger tapping on her chin, "Can... Can I tell you again?"

" _Ara~_ Natsuki is so _kawaii_ , ne? _Hai_ , Natsuki can tell me again"

It was going to be a long night for Shizuru. Apparently, when Natsuki was tipsy, she was a bit adventurous and aggressive in bed. She had a lot of energy. And she also really liked to talk. A lot.

 **A Few Hours Later...**

When the young man took over and opened his eyes, he found himself unable to move, somewhat trapped. There was a naked, sleeping blunette laying on top of him, holding on tightly to him, the same one from two days ago.

He wasn't supposed to go in _the dark_ tonight. His father had ordered him to take a rest, that within a weeks time they'd take over again. They had been going in almost everyday for the past three weeks and the body needed rest. Both, his and the brunette's bodies needed rest. And since he had disconnected so suddenly the other night, his mind needed a break as well.

He really missed the brunette though and wanted to see her, so he went behind his father's back and connected.

 _"So, it is not a one-time occurrence as father had said"_ The young man whispered, hands turning into tight fists. So tight that his long nails dug deep into his skin, causing him to bleed.

The body feels no pain while in _the dark_. Doesn't feel coldness, warmness. Doesn't feel discomfort. Doesn't feel at all.

The body also doesn't express emotions, and couldn't make sounds, voice words. All he could do was see what she sees, hear what she hears, and command her to move.

He went ahead and slowly removed the naked blunette from his body, not wanting to wake her up, and quietly crawled out of bed. He walked over to the vanity, to the mirror, he wanted to see her face, her beautiful eyes and face. He really missed her.

Once he got there, he stared for a long while. Just stood there and stared at her face, and then her beautiful, flawless body. She was naked, completely naked, and there were faint marks on her neck. Her lips were slightly swollen and pink, perhaps from biting and kissing. And there were a few marks here and there as well, some on her chest, some on her hip, and a mark near her belly button. Her pearly, smooth skin tainted with someone else's marks, tainted with someone else's love bites.

He didn't like that.

He hated it.

He wanted them gone.

"Shizuru it's still dark, please come back to bed..."

He heard her companion sleepily say.

 _"Shizuru..."_ He had finally learned her name. After over a year of trying to get it out of her without success, he had finally learned her name. He didn't have to call her 'deadly beautiful' anymore. _"What a beautiful name"_

He looked down, something in the vanity had caught his attention. Something sharp, something pointy, something shiny. It was a letter opener.

He reached out for it with his bloody hand. His eyes then settled on the mirror, on the reflection of a sleeping blunette. If only he could get rid of her, then there'd be no more marks on her perfect skin, no more waking up next to this intruder.

He slowly turned around, gripping the letter opener tighter with his bloody hand, a trail of blood now filling the object. He took a step closer, and closer, and closer... He was almost there, he could see her breathing, could see the falling and rising of her chest.

If he stabbed her heart with the letter opener, if he stabbed her chest, then he'd be free from her.

No more waking up next to her.

It'd just be him and the brunette again.

 _"Son?... Son, stop!"_

But he had to suddenly pull out. His father had caught him, had pulled him from _the_ _dark_.

" _A... Ara?_ "

Shizuru blinked rapidly a few times, feeling a little dizzy, out of place. Her hands instantly went for her face to cover her eyes.

She breathed in and out a few times as she sat on the edge of the bed, waiting for the dizziness to go away.

When she brought her hands down to her lap and noticed the letter opener and her bloody hand, "H-How..." And now feeling the sharp pain on her palm, she quickly dropped the item on the floor and looked around her, making sure the blunette was okay, that she was not harmed.

"Was... Was I sleepwalking again?" She thought aloud, a little frightened. She had panicked the moment she had seen the blood. She was just glad it was her own blood.

How did that happen?

Last she knew, she had fallen asleep after making love. Natsuki had completely worn her out.

She quickly stood and headed for the restroom to tend to her wound, grabbing the robe on her way there to cover her naked body.

It looked like at some point during her sleep her nails had dug hard into her palm and had caused her to bleed. She could see the four marks of her fingers, of her nails. Perhaps it was time to cut them to prevent this from happening again.

She stared at her reflection in the mirror as she washed her hands, noticing there was blood on her face as well. She must've dirtied it when she rubbed her eyes after suddenly waking up.

Shizuru's eyebrows furrowed, a frown appeared on her tender lips. This sleepwalking of hers, it was more dangerous than she had imagined. She should be more careful, she could hurt herself, or hurt someone else without noticing. ... _Perhaps I should seek professional help..._

 **\- 0 -**

* * *

 **Thanks for Reading!**

 **And Thanks for the Reviews/Comments**

 **I searched the web, and I couldn't find out where Natsuki Kruger is from so I made up Duran. It's not in her profile and to my knowledge she didn't mention it in the series.**

 **Also, since there are rumors that Una Shamrock, the previous wielder of the Bewitching Gem, might be Shizuru's mother, I went ahead and used that. There's not much on ShizNat's background in this series so I don't know LOL But if you guys know, let me know and I will edit!**

 **ONE MORE THING: There aren't any airplanes in the Otome Series, but for the sake of getting Natsuki and Shizuru to Aries and Duran faster, lets pretend Garderobe has exclusive access to one.**

 **Hope you guys enjoyed the chapter!**

 **Let me know what you guys think.**

 **"For the love of ShizNat"**


	9. Chapter 9

**In the Darkness**

 **A Mai Otome ShizNat Story**

 **Chapter 9**

 **21 Months Earlier…**

The older of the two kneeled in front of the coughing, wheezing brunette. He brought a finger to her chin, slowly raising her head to look at her face. To make eye contact with her.

"What is your name?"

He softly asked again, but all he got from her was silence.

Always silence.

Silence and that calm, haunting stare.

She never uttered a word, a sound. Not one. It was beginning to irritate him, he was beginning to lose his patience.

They have had her captive for about six months now, and they were as lost as the first day, as clueless as the first day. With every passing day they had more and more questions, and they were getting no answers, they were getting nowhere with her.

This woman, she couldn't be broken. She was very knowledgeable, too clever, too smart, which made her mind too strong to fall for any of their tricks. She saw right through them.

And she never flinched, never uttered a word, no matter what pain they inflicted on her body. It was as if she was made of steel.

The man sighed, "Again" then softly said, so softly it was as if he was whispering words of love to her.

He watched as his son, who was standing behind her, grabbed the back of her head and roughly dipped it into the bucket of ice, cold water again.

The man stared at his watch the whole time. When it hit the thirty second mark, he nodded to his son, commanding him to stop.

Shizuru gasped for air again, her chest rapidly heaving, her face numb. They've been at this for the past hour now. But no matter what they did, they couldn't break her, they won't. She was trained for this. Trained to be an exceptional bodyguard, an exceptional warrior, an exceptional detective, and spy. An exceptional Otome. She had personally trained herself to persevere, to persevere whatever came her way, to endure no matter the circumstance.

"What are those curious particles we found in your blood? What are they called?" The man softly tried again, asked again, "How do they work?"

But she said nothing.

"How are they activated? What's the _source_?"

Not a single word.

Another sigh, "Again" And with every unanswered question came the dip of the head. The amount of time in the water increasing the more the brunette resisted.

The man calmly walked over to his desk and grabbed a syringe.

"That's enough for today" He commanded his son. "We will not get anything from her this way. It's time for the next stage"

The next stage wasn't pretty. It was torment, agony, _hallucinations_.

Every day, he would inject a chemical, a drug. He would inject this into her blood, provoking a high fever. With the fever came the hallucinations, and with the hallucinations came the anguish, the pain.

Imagine losing your most important person over and over and over again.

Imagine killing them over and over and over again.

Imagine their blood in your hands,

And their blood couldn't be washed away,

Your sins couldn't be washed away.

Yes, that kind of agony, that kind of torture, that kind of pain.

He slowly walked over to her, kneeled in front of her, and stabbed her neck with the needle, the syringe. This action, his harshness, that caused her to slightly wince. Then, he slowly pushed the chemical into her body, he saw as the white liquid slowly disappeared from the syringe. Disappeared until it was completely empty.

"Lock her up" The man commanded as he made his way out of the room, "There is no need for bondage, she will not be able to move after this"

Normally, they would tie her up in her cell in case she tried to escape again. But not anymore, not in the next stage.

"Yes, father…" The son obediently replied. Then, picked up the semiconscious brunette bridal style. "Deadly beautiful, why do you continue to resist?" He whispered to her as he looked into her hooded, tired eyes and walked over to her cell.

He knew she was tired, exhausted. Just the prior week, they had used the 'No Sleep' method on her. Every time she closed her beautiful eyes, they turned on the bright lights, and would play loud music, preventing her from falling asleep.

"Trust me, things will only get worse after this" He whispered to her.

Yes, next came the injections.

And if toying with her emotions, if toying with her mind and her heart didn't work, then came the electric shocks.

And if that didn't work either, the list went on and on and on…

 **Present Time**

Shizuru lay on her side, on the seat opposite to Natsuki, facing her. Her head was resting on her arm. She was using her arm as a pillow, as support. Her knees bending slightly, almost in fetal position.

She was wearing white linen shorts today, along with golden colored sandals, and a loose fitting, forest green, V-neck t-shirt.

Natsuki had suggested she'd wear something comfortable, something that would keep her cool. Told her that the weather in Duran was very hot and humid during the summer months. It was one of the reasons Natsuki didn't like to visit her homeland. The weather there was never pleasant, it was either too hot or too cold.

It was going to be six in the afternoon in a few minutes. They had boarded the Jet about thirty minutes ago to head for Duran. The plane ride from Aries was an hour and half at most, depending on the weather, depending on the turbulence they'd find on their way there. The pilot had announced a few minutes prior that they were on schedule, that there was very little wind on the forecast today, so they should arrive Natsuki's birthplace on time.

Shizuru had been reading a book and had dozed off about ten minutes ago. Her lips were slightly parted, a small sound escaping them. It sounded like a soft snore.

She was loosely holding onto the book she was reading. It was by the edge of the seat, almost falling.

When Natsuki looked up from her notepad and noticed this, she grabbed it before it could fall. She closed it and took a quick glance at the title, _…Traces of You: Finding Inner Peace, Volume One…_ She raised a curious brow because of the title, finding it unusual that Shizuru was reading this, then placed it on the tray next to her.

Natsuki covered her mouth as she let out a small yawn. She was very tired herself. It had been a very long day today, and it didn't help that she had had way too much to drink the prior night.

Luckily for her, she had already setup a wakeup call with concierge when she had checked into the hotel, so she was awake on time for the summit. She had enough time to spare, enough time to bathe, have breakfast, take a few pills to get rid of the headache, and review her proposal one more time.

She had little recollection of the prior night and was not sure how she overdid it with the wine, but she did have an idea.

She guessed that since she was in good company, since she was too immersed in conversation and was actually having fun, she had lost count of how many glasses of wine she had had. And since Shizuru wasn't drinking her wine she went ahead and enjoyed hers for her, causing her to double order and lose track.

Emerald eyes fell on the sleeping brunette's neck and then her upper, inner thigh. She had a small bruise in those parts of her body, small hickeys, love bites.

Natsuki couldn't help and swallow, couldn't help and blush. She did that to Shizuru the prior night, those were her love bites adorning the woman's body.

She had not been careful. The wine had made her lose control of her actions, of her ability to think, and had been a little too rough with her in bed. Usually, with the Nanomachines, these types of marks faded within two hours' time. But Shizuru didn't have enough Nanomachines in her bloodstream, so she was going to sport those love bites for who knows how long.

… _How embarrassing…_ Natsuki thought.

Green eyes then fell upon the brunette's bandaged, right palm. Fell upon her right hand.

She had panicked when she woke up to that, to that bandaged hand resting on her naked waist. And since she only had a few flashes of what had happened the prior night, since everything was still fuzzy to her, she thought that she herself had done that to Shizuru somehow, that she had hurt her since she had been a little aggressive with her. She doesn't even remember when Haruka and Yukino left their table, everything after that was extremely blurry to her.

When she had asked Shizuru about it in the morning, she had assured her that no, that it was an accident and that it had happened in her sleep. That her nails were too long and that she had fisted her hand too tightly, had dug into her skin somehow.

Natsuki wasn't sure what to think about that, if she believed her or not. All she knew was that she wasn't going to drink more than one glass of wine ever again, one glass would be her limit from now on.

Okay, maybe two glasses. She could hold a little more than one glass.

"Headmistress, you have a phone call"

Natsuki was pulled from her thoughts by the flight attendants hushed words. Hushed for she had noticed the sleeping brunette and didn't want to disturb her.

"Ah, _hai_ , _arigato_ " Natsuki stood from her seat and grabbed her jacket on the seat next to her, "I'll take it in the back" She softly answered. And when the flight attendant took her leave, she gently placed her jacket over the brunette's exposed legs since it had become a little chilly due to the high altitude.

Natsuki looked up ahead, looked towards the direction of the flight attendant. When she noticed she was busy making hot tea for them she slowly leaned downwards and place a gentle kiss on the brunette's cheek.

She smiled and lingered there just for a moment, the tip of her nose caressing her cheek, and then pulled away. She then made her way to the back of the Jet, there was a phone on the rear wall there.

She picked it up, "Kruger, Natsuki speaking" Was the husky answer, left hand resting on her hip.

" _You're hard to find these days"_

Came the cheery reply. It was Tokiha, Mai.

"Oh, hi Mai" The blunette then said, her posture now a little more relaxed since she was talking to her friend. "Did something happen at Garderobe?" She immediately asked, thinking that might be the reason for her sudden call.

" _Not to my knowledge… I just wanted to check in with you. I'm back from my mission"_

… _Oh, right…_ Natsuki grimaced and scratched the back of her neck. She had totally forgotten she had sent Mai to Cardair Empire to check in on Akane.

There seemed to be a minor dispute, and Garderobe was only getting involved because Akane was a Meister Otome now, and she had personally asked Natsuki for help.

Natsuki just wished the girl would make up her mind. Make up her mind whether she wanted to marry Kazuya this year or not. Or that at least Kazuya respected Akane's wishes, she wanted to continue being an Otome a little longer. That's what this dispute was all about. It was silly, really. And aggravating. To Natsuki, having to send Mai all the way to Cardair was a waste of resources, a waste of valuable Otome time.

" _I managed to keep everything under control. The prince understands and will wait another year… Kids these days, honestly"_

"Thanks, Mai, I really appreciate you doing this" The blunette smiled, truly grateful for her help.

" _No worries, it's my pleasure. I've never been to Cardair before…"_

And after a few seconds of silence,

" _Ne, Natsuki, Shizuru looked like a princess in that dress last night. I bet you couldn't take your eyes off her"_

Natsuki smirked. Shizuru totally did look wonderful last night. She looked so sexy. So, so sexy in that dress. It fit her perfectly, like a charm. She really couldn't take her eyes away from her all night long.

Wait, rewind... What?

"H-How do you know?" She nervously let out, smirk long gone. "A-About the dress, I mean" She wasn't going to admit to Mai about the second part.

" _It's on the Wind Bloom Times. First thing I saw when I got off the bus this morning, she's on the cover page…"_

Natsuki's right eye involuntarily twitched. She didn't notice any reporters, didn't notice anyone taking pictures of her last night.

She wanted to keep Shizuru away from the public eye for as long as she could since Shizuru wasn't well, since her memories weren't all there yet.

Shizuru was well known everywhere, she was one of the most famous and beloved Otomes, and she had become somewhat the face of Garderobe in the recent years. Everyone knew her, everyone loved her. Many girls decided to become Otomes because of her. She made being an Otome look luxurious, easy even. And it really wasn't.

Natsuki was beginning to think it was a bad decision to bring her to Aries, that this trip was a bad idea. Shizuru was safe inside Garderobe's walls. No one dared enter Garderobe, most definitely not reporters. Garderobe was like its own country and it had restricted access. Anyone entering without permission or clearance was clearly trespassing and they would be detained.

" _And you made it on the cover as well. You're at the bottom of the stairs, waiting for your princess… It's so romantic"_

She heard the girl dreamily sigh. And then,

" _Don't mess it up this time, Natsuki!"_

Came the reprimand.

And Natsuki's hand produced an involuntary twitch because of those words, because of the tone.

" _You have to get better soon. That way, when she recovers all her memories, you can win her heart back and start fresh. Show her that you really have changed"_

Oh, right. "Um, Mai. About that…" Mai doesn't know that they were together again.

While the brunette was missing, Natsuki had confided in her ex-classmate and best friend. On one of those desperate nights with no news on Shizuru's whereabouts, she had told her about her feelings for her, had _somewhat_ told her about their relationship. _Somewhat_ because she still couldn't bring herself to voice that they were a couple.

She had also told her about the problem she had, her issue with displaying affection in public, amongst a few others.

Mai already knew about their relationship though. She didn't say anything to Natsuki about it, waiting for the woman to come out on her own, to say it herself. She wasn't blind, she could clearly see the energy, the sparks between them. She could clearly see their familiarity and closeness. Shizuru's playfulness. The hidden touches. There was definitely something there.

She had been trapped in Black Valley for many years and wasn't present to see how their relationship came about, but she did see it flourish when they were students, when they were Pearls. She did see when their love began, and knew it was only a matter of time for them to express it to one another, for them to come together.

" _What is it?"_

Came the warry question.

"S-Something… Something happened over the weekend" Natsuki blushingly said in a low voice, turning to face the wall. She wanted to talk with more privacy.

" _What happened?"_

Natsuki swallowed as she looked behind her again, as she looked towards the flight attendant's direction. She was quite a distance away so there was no way she would hear this.

" _WHAT HAPPENED?"_

Natsuki flinched, Mai had yelled and sounded very impatient.

"Stop yelling at me!" Natsuki somewhat hissed, then composed herself and timidly said, "You… You know"

There was silence after that.

A long silence.

The silence was so long that it was starting to become uncomfortable.

" _No, I don't know"_

And then,

" _Say it"_

Natsuki's right eye involuntarily twitched yet again, her grip of the phone tightening more and more.

She knew what Mai was doing, she wanted her to say it aloud. To say the words. To admit it. To admit that she was in a relationship with the brunette.

" _You have to say it, Natsuki. If you want to get better, you have to say it. You have to learn to express your feelings more"_

Natsuki nervously swallowed yet again. It was what Shizuru wanted all along back then, for her to express her feelings, to be more open about them. That's why she always teased her, always behaved a little inappropriately with others when she was around. Because she wanted to get a rise out of her, get some sort of public reaction, positive or negative, out of her.

It took Natsuki some fidgeting and time, but she finally whispered it to her: "We… W-We made love"

" _WAIT. WHAT? COME AGAIN?!"_

Mai yelled again. She thought that Natsuki would say that they talked and were a couple again, or that they kissed, or hugged, or something else.

But made love? Holy ShizNat! Not in a million years!

"She remembers her feelings, remembers that there was something between us. Or, I mean, she had suspicions or something" Natsuki continued in a whisper, "She asked me about it. A-And then one thing led to the other…"

" _How does talking about it lead to sex? Did you pounce on her?"_

"What? No! Y-You weren't there, you don't know!" Natsuki quickly hissed, blushing profusely. "The mood was there, it just happened" She could hear Mai's laughter afterwards.

" _The mood was there, uh?"_

Was the smug reply.

" _Aww~ I'm so happy for you, Natsuki!"_

And then,

" _What does this mean?"_

"What do you mean?" Natsuki asked with furrowed brows, a little confused by the question.

" _Are you two…"_

Ah, now Natsuki knew what she meant.

" _You have to say it. At least to your friends, Natsuki. We won't judge"_

And after another long moment of silence,

" _Remember, she broke up with you because of this"_

Mai knew about the break up. The moment Natsuki had started to frequently visit her ramen establishment with that sadness in her eyes, Mai knew. She didn't say anything to Natsuki about it, but she knew. She wanted Natsuki to feel comfortable enough to tell her on her own. That day never came though.

" _Don't doubt it for a second, memories or not, she'll get frustrated again, she'll leave you again"_

Natsuki sighed and nodded in understanding. She lightly shut her eyes, a hand now rubbing her forehead.

Yes, Shizuru had left her in the past because of this. Because she kept their relationship a secret.

To Natsuki, nothing could compare with the sadness of Shizuru's disappearance, nothing, she was truly inconsolable and heartbroken then.

But, if she were to rank that time, if she were to rank those five months they had broken up, it came second, no question about it. Those were the saddest, hardest, loneliest five months she'd ever experienced with the brunette close by. She never wanted to go through that again.

One of the reasons Shizuru took her back and gave her another chance was because she had said she would try to change. Well, after they had made love that night I mean.

Being apart was killing them both, and in one of those restless nights Natsuki had paid the brunette a visit in her quarters, just to talk business, talk about the school. Only to talk.

But then talking led to sitting closer, and sitting closer led to a caress of hands, and then a caress of hands led to looking intently to one another's eyes, and then to leaning closer, and then to kissing, and so on.

In short, one thing led to the other, and hands and lips desperately made their way to one another again, kissing fervently again, hands entangling in each others hair again, engaging in a night of passion, of clothes being quickly discarded on the floor.

Natsuki had told her that night that she would try to change. And she meant it, she really did.

But then another year went by and Natsuki didn't change. Nothing changed, everything remained the same as before. Exactly the same. She was sure that Shizuru was going to leave her again, perhaps forever that time. Sometimes she thought that Shizuru was probably better off without her, without the complications of her troubled mind.

" _Hello?"_

" _Natsuki?"_

Natsuki blinked a few times, the voice that brought her back from her reverie.

"Um… _Hai_ , Mai" She softly replied. She swallowed one more time and glanced over at the sleeping brunette's direction, looked at her pretty, sleepy, resting face. "Shizuru… Shizuru and I… We're… We're together again" She finally said it, "We're a couple"

And after a moment of silence,

" _See? That wasn't so hard, was it? The world didn't stop turning, did it?"_

Natsuki's face softened, a small smile on her features. "Hmm" She hummed in agreement.

" _And since you're going to Duran, maybe it's time to tell your parents that you're a lesbi-"_

"I-I can't hear you, Mai. I'm hanging up now. Bye!" Natsuki quickly said and hung up.

She involuntarily shuddered, a coldness suddenly coursing all over her body.

Tell her parents that she's a lesbian? That she's with Shizuru? No way. No way! Baby steps… She had to deal with her own issues first before bringing more people into the mix.

Natsuki sighed and then slowly walked back to her seat. She was about to sit down when she noticed the brunette's furrowed eyebrows, her trembling hand, her soft whispers.

"Stop…" Shizuru whispered, softly panting. "No more, please… please… Not again"

Natsuki frowned and then kneeled in front of her. It seemed like Shizuru was having a nightmare.

Her fingers went for Shizuru's bangs and brushed them to the side, softly caressing her forehead in the process.

"Hey, Shizuru" Natsuki's hand then went to the brunette's shoulder. "Shizuru, wake up" She softly said as she gently shook her.

" _Ie…_ _IE!_ GET AWAY FROM ME! DO NOT TOUCH ME! S-STOP!" And the touch, the shake instantly awoke her, all of her senses in override.

A hand went straight for Natsuki's chest and pushed her, pinned her to the ground. Her right hand turning into a tight fist, up in the air, about to take a hard swing at Natsuki's face.

"I-It's me, Shizuru!"

But the blunette's voice prevented her from doing so, from punching her. Her husky voice brought her back.

Shizuru rapidly blinked as she stared at widened, green eyes below her. Her shaky fist still in the air, her hand still pressing on Natsuki's chest, pressing her against the floor. She was heavily breathing now. Short and fast. Short and fast. She was breathless. Totally breathless.

The flight attendant quickly headed towards their direction, but Natsuki stopped her from getting any closer by raising her left hand. Silently commanding her to stay away, to not come near them. Everything was okay, she had this under control.

Shizuru then frantically looked around, looked at her surroundings. She felt so disoriented, so out of place. Trapped. And her heart, her heart was beating at an incredibly fast pace.

"I-I can't breathe" Her lips were trembling as she looked around, "I-I can't breathe!" She quickly said, her panic raising. "I-I can't be in here. I… I-I need to get out of here" She let go of the blunette's chest and was about to stand, but Natsuki's strong arms, her strong embrace prevented her from doing so. "Let go of me!"

"Shhhhh. It's okay!"

But it was not okay. Not to Shizuru.

"Let go of me!"

"Calm down, Shizuru… You can breathe… Breathe"

Shizuru tried to wriggle out of her strong hold but couldn't. "P-Please, let go of me!" Her eyes were watery now, "P-Please" Tears were starting to form.

"Breath in through your nose, out through your mouth" Natsuki then softly said to the wriggling brunette, holding her tighter, holding her still. "Do it, Shizuru. Breathe in through your nose, out through your mouth" She instructed again, and then heard as the brunette attempted to do so. She heard her long, shaky breaths in and then out. In and then out.

"Good, let's count our breaths, okay? Let's count to ten. Count with me"

Shizuru closed her eyes and tried to slowly breathe in again. Once she had breathed out, she heard as Natsuki said _'Ichi'_ , then so did she, " _I-Ichi_ " She breathed in and out again, and then said, " _N-Ni_ " And then again, " _San_ " And on and on until they got to ten, " _Juu_ "

Shizuru rested her forehead on Natsuki's shoulder, feeling a little calmer, finding it a little easier to breathe again. Natsuki had stopped holding her tightly a second ago and was now rubbing her back in a soothing, upwards-downwards notion.

"You're safe" Natsuki softly told her, just like in the healing chamber two days ago. "You're with me"

"I-I'm safe" Shizuru whispered back with closed eyes, "I'm with Natsuki"

And after a short moment of silence, "It was only a nightmare, Shizuru. It can't hurt you"

Shizuru thought about this for a long moment as she felt the woman's hands comfort her.

"Do you know what dreams are, what nightmares are, Natsuki?"

When no answer came, she gave her own definition, her own interpretation of it, not what the books said. She used her own experience, used what she had learned along the way this past month.

"They are a desperate attempt for emotions and memories to connect with one another" And then, with a frown, added: "I don't think I was in a very nice place, Natsuki"

And Natsuki didn't think so either. "You said some of your memories come to you in your dreams. Can you tell me what you were dreaming about? Have you had these kinds of dreams before?"

Shizuru didn't respond, at least not right away. She sat a little straighter and looked at Natsuki in the eyes, both of her hands resting on the blunette's shoulders. Then, feeling as Natsuki's hands settled on her hips.

"Can we talk about this when we get back to Garderobe? I don't wish to think about this right now" Instead, she wished she could forget every little piece of it. "I'd prefer to hear what Natsuki has planned for us in Duran"

" _Headmistress… We are slightly ahead of schedule and are about to begin our descend. We should land in approximately fifteen minutes"_ The voice in the intercom said, slightly startling them.

Shizuru then slowly got off the blunette and helped her stand. " _Kannin na_ , did I hurt you?"

" _Ie_ " Came the soft reply. She picked up her jacket from the floor and neatly placed it on the seat in front of her. When she sat down, Shizuru took the seat next to hers, and pensively stared out the window.

Natsuki quietly stared at her face for a moment. Stared as the color, the warmness of the sunlight hit her delicate face, making her Ruby eyes a little brighter, her skin and hair a little lighter.

And as she explained to the brunette what she had planned for their short trip, for their short two days in Duran, she couldn't help and think if there were others in the same situation as the brunette. Wondered if whatever took the brunette from her, had taken others as well.

She decided she would start researching about this. As soon as she checked into their hotel in Duran, she'd call Youko right away and get started.

 **About an Hour Later,**

" _Arigato_ " Natsuki said to the bellman who had greeted them upon arriving the hotel. He took their luggage and placed them on the luggage cart and was now following them to reception.

"Shizuru, why don't you take a seat while I check us in? I won't take long" Natsuki suggested.

They were just going to check-in and then take a walk in the park. Afterwards, they would have dinner at the hotel's restaurant and then head up to their room and call it a night.

" _Hai_ " Shizuru answered, "I'm going to order iced chai tea while I wait, would Natsuki like some?"

"Um, sure" Natsuki's eyebrows raised in amusement.

"Soy on yours?"

" _Hai, arigato_ " How did Shizuru know that Chai was Duran's specialty? And that she liked soy milk with her chai? Sometimes, Shizuru's lucidness, escaped her, was beyond her. Sometimes it felt like Shizuru didn't have amnesia at all. These moments of clarity didn't happen often. They came out of the blue, out of nowhere, but they happened. And Shizuru never questioned it, it just came naturally to her, so Natsuki wasn't sure if she should even bring it up.

When Shizuru walked away Natsuki faced the receptionist. "Hi, I'm checking in. The reservation is under Kuga, Natsuki" That was the alias she traveled under. Since she became an Otome, she never used her real name when traveling. It was for safety reasons.

"I know this is a last-minute request, but is the suite facing the park available?" Normally, Natsuki would stay at her parents' house while in Duran. But since Shizuru joined her this time around, she thought it best for them to stay in a hotel. This way, they could avoid all the questions she was sure her mother would have. Questions regarding her disappearance that Shizuru couldn't answer.

After a few clicks on the computer, "Yes, it is. Would you like to change rooms?"

"Please" Natsuki then turned around and faced the brunette's direction again. She was in front of the bar talking to the waiter, ordering their drinks. "May I use your phone?" When the receptionist nodded and motioned for the phone near the wall, " _Arigato_ " Natsuki went ahead and walked towards it. She then picked it up and dialed a few numbers.

" _Garderobe. Helene, Youko speaking"_

"Hi Youko, it's Natsuki" The blunette greeted in a hushed voice. She then turned around and faced the brunette's direction again, her eyes on her. She noticed she was now sitting down on the couch, looking at her surroundings, admiring the place.

"I need you to do me a favor" She watched as Shizuru warmly smiled at her direction and gave a small wave. Natsuki waved to her in return. "Those readings that the computer picked up when Shizuru disappeared and then came back, have you come across those readings before?"

" _No, but I haven't been working at Garderobe for long"_

"I see..." Natsuki saw as a toddler, a little boy, perhaps two years old at most, stumbled over to where the brunette was sitting.

" _What's on your mind?"_

"Is… there any way to figure out if they have occurred in the past?" She watched as Shizuru's face lit up when the little boy tapped on her leg, he was giggling, playing with her, showing her his toy. And then watched as his parents appeared soon after. They seemed to be apologizing to Shizuru for the interruption, which she smilingly waved off. And now, it seems that she was asking them if she could carry the little boy.

" _I can look at the archives, maybe the prior Chief of Technology came across it and logged it"_

… _She looks so happy…_ Natsuki thought, a small blush appearing on her cheeks as she watched her interact with the child.

The year Shizuru had gone missing, she had been attracted to babies, to children in general, like a moth to a flame. Whenever she spotted a toddler or a baby carriage, she always walked towards it and made pleasant conversation with the mother. She would make cooing sounds to the baby, would play with them, and would lovingly caress their face.

Natsuki thought that perhaps Shizuru's maternal instincts, that her maternal clock was starting to tick. They never talked about marriage or children before. The conversation just never came up. And how could it when their relationship was kept secret? The thought of marriage, of children, never came across her mind.

" _Natsuki? Do you want me to check the archives?"_

Natsuki blinked a few times and faced away, faced the wall. " _H-Hai_ , Youko. Please do… Please leave whatever you find on my desk. I will review it with you when I get back"

Depending on what Youko finds, when she gets back to Garderobe, she'll send Nao to investigate whether there were any missing persons reports around those times, and if any of them came back.

When she was done conversing with Youko she hung up the phone and headed back towards the receptionist to pick up their room keys. She then slowly made her way towards the brunette, who was still talking to the toddler's parents.

" _Fufu_ ~ I don't have children yet. Maybe someday" Shizuru happily replied to the couple and then handed the giggling toddler back to them.

"I'm sure you'll make a wonderful mother, you're a natural" They sincerely smiled at her, "It was nice meeting you, and sorry for the interruption"

"No worries, he didn't interrupt at all" Kyoto-ben responded and then waved goodbye to the waving toddler as they walked away.

"I see you're making new friends"

Shizuru placed her attention on the blunette. "Babies are so cute, don't you think, Natsuki?" Was the smiley response. She grabbed Natsuki's drink from the coffee table and handed it to her. Then, grabbed her own and stood. She had ordered their drinks to go. "Are we checked in?"

" _Hai_ , we're all set… The bellboy is going to take our luggage to our room" She watched as Shizuru started to walk, to head towards the entrance of the building. They were going to head towards the huge park next to it and take a walk.

"S-Shizuru, wait…" She took a step closer to her, her right hand slowly raising. She quickly looked around, she just couldn't help it. She looked at her surroundings and then noticed there were a lot of people there.

She couldn't help and swallow. She was trying to get better, she really was. She wanted to do a simple gesture, to just hold her hand in public, to reach out to her and hold her hand, she really did. But for some reason she just couldn't. The rapid beat of her heart didn't let her, her sweaty palms didn't let her, all the people around her didn't let her. So, she changed her mind, she backed off.

"Is something wrong?" Shizuru asked, eyebrows arching in interest. She was unsure as to why Natsuki had asked her to wait.

" _Ie_ , never mind" The blunette then whispered as she tucked both hands in her jeans pockets, and soon after followed the brunette out of the hotel.

Baby steps, Natsuki.

Baby steps.

She was going to have to take it a step at a time, a day at a time, an issue at a time.

 **\- 0 -**

* * *

 **Thanks for Reading!**

 **And thanks for the Reviews/Comments**

 **I think this is the first chapter I've written that doesn't have an _Ara_ from Shizuru or an _Oi_ from Natsuki LOL**

 **And no kiss either, on the lips I mean. And zero teasing. What is happening?! Ah well**

 **Let me know what you guys think!**

 **"For the love of ShizNat"**


	10. Chapter 10

**In the Darkness**

 **A Mai Otome ShizNat Story**

 **Chapter 10**

"Does this feel good?" Hot, seductive Kyoto-ben whispered in Natsuki's ear, soon after placing a slow, long kiss there. Her soft lips lingering there.

The morning sunlight was beaming through the open windows, giving the large room a soft, warm, inviting atmosphere. There was also a gentle breeze playing with the long, pastel curtains, making it lift towards their direction, dancing with the wind ever so often.

This hotel, being one of the oldest, most prestigious ones in the country, wasn't very high. It only had ten floors total, so they could hear the faint sounds of the outside world. They could hear the honking cars from time to time, the screeching of tires making sudden stops. Could hear distant laughter and dog barks.

They could also hear the sound of the trees, the sound of rattling branches and leaves because of the sudden, light winds. And could hear the birds' joyful chirping, their joyful singing since it was still morning and their room was facing the park.

It was a calm morning. A calm and amorous one. And after a long night of rest, a night of eating caramel popcorn and cuddling while watching old movies, they woke up a little late, fully rested and hungry, so they ordered breakfast in bed.

And after a breakfast full of laughter and of teasingly feeding fruit to one another; A breakfast filled with light touches, soft kisses and pillow talk, the atmosphere slowly changed from a joyful one to a stimulating one, bringing us to the current situation.

" _Hai_ " Natsuki whispered and then bit her lower lip, her breaths becoming heavier and heavier by the second.

She was straddling Shizuru's hips, her forehead resting against the brunette's. Her right hand was in her thick, fair mane, fingers entangled there. Her other hand was holding on tightly to the crimson, padded headboard in front of her, Shizuru's back was resting on a pillow against it.

"Nn~" She let out a high whimper by the circling motion of her lover's fingers. Those playful fingertips that were taking too long, too long to reach their final destination, to reach her core.

But Natsuki was okay with that, it felt good and she didn't want it to stop.

"Ah~" And then let out a husky gasp, her eyebrows furrowing as her head tilted back. Her hips weren't moving. No, not yet. She didn't want to seem desperate and wanted her lover to take her time.

Right now, she just wanted to enjoy her lover's touch, her lover's kisses, her lover's caress. Enjoy the fact that only they could do this to one another, that only they could be this intimate with one another. That only their touch could provoke such sounds, could cause such need in one another.

When the circling motion stopped, when the hand that was hiding inside her pajama pants, hiding inside her panties stopped moving, Natsuki went ahead and opened her lustful Emerald eyes. She knew what her lover wanted. She wanted her lips on hers, she wanted her to kiss her.

So, Natsuki did as silently asked, she leaned forward and closed the very short distance between them. Her trembling lips met the brunette's own, met her sweet, adventurous tongue, engaging in a slow, passionate kiss. This action that caused Shizuru's hand to start moving again, to cup her sex and slowly rub it again.

"Mm~" Causing her to moan into the kiss. Causing her to finally start grinding on her, finally moving her hips.

Slowly.

Slowly.

Very, very slowly moving her hips against her hand. Shizuru's other hand was on her upper back, keeping her in place.

"Ah~" And then she gasped again, her lover's fingers finally, _finally_ inside her. Inside her for the first time in the past two years.

They hadn't made love this way yet, Shizuru hadn't penetrated yet.

Natsuki didn't move, not a muscle, not yet. She remained that way a while longer, enjoying the sensation of her two, long fingers against her throbbing, tight walls.

"I missed you inside me…" Whispering as her hand left its grip of the headboard to join the other one in caressing her lover's heated face, leaning in and kissing her slowly again. Lips meeting and parting every few seconds as her hips finally started to move again, to move in sync with her lover's hand.

Slowly at first.

Very, very slowly at first.

And then increasing their pace as the seconds passed by,

\- Tick-tock -

\- Tick-tock -

As the clock's thinner hand kept on circling around.

\- Ring -

They could hear the phone ringing.

Could hear its echo joining the moaning and panting sounds being produced by the blunette's lips, joining the sound of the bed's soft creaks.

And Natsuki's hands held onto the brunette's face. Her hands on her ears, her creasing forehead once again pressed against hers.

"S-Shizuru" The tip of her nose touching hers, unable to kiss her anymore, unable to keep up with their tongues' caress. Unable to do that simple task because she couldn't focus. Because she was close.

So, so close.

She just needed a little more friction to get there, penetration alone never did the job.

And she totally received that extra push when the brunette's palm started to hit the right spot, when her palm started to rub against her very sensitive nub.

"Nn~" And then, within seconds, Natsuki's world completely stopped. Her hands and feet and lips, her whole body shivered at the same time. Limbs no longer moving, hips no longer swinging, lost in the colors and the feeling, lost in the pleasure and sensation of her climax.

And Shizuru, she watched with a sense of satisfaction, a sense of achievement as the blunette came. She watched every single second of it, taking a mental note of every expression, every sound, every breath. Taking in Natsuki's extremely reddened cheeks and neck, her trembling lips, her gasps, and the sudden calmness of her satisfied face.

She was beautiful, gorgeous.

She was breathtaking.

And she was hers.

Only hers.

A smile adorned Shizuru's features as she watched the blunette come down from her high.

When Natsuki's breathing seemed normal again, Shizuru leaned forward and gave her a gentle kiss on the lips, on the cheek, on the neck, and then pulled her in for a soft embrace.

And after a long moment of silence, a long moment of breathing and embracing one another,

"Okay, my turn" Natsuki happily chimed. And she leaned backwards towards the bed, falling back, taking the laughing brunette down with her by the neck.

" _Fufu_ ~ I don't think so" Shizuru sing-sang between giggles, feeling Natsuki's lips on her face and neck. "I had enough of Natsuki the other night, she completely worn me out"

And Natsuki had to do a double-take and make sure that this was Shizuru, who in fact, had said this. That it was Shizuru who was on top of her.

"Are you feeling okay?"

Shizuru never said no to intimate relations.

Shizuru never said no to sex.

Never.

Never!

She brought a hand to the woman's forehead and brushed those chestnut tresses to the side, wanting to feel her warmth, to make sure she wasn't sick again.

And Shizuru giggled again, " _Ara_ ~ I have the marks all over my body to prove it. Natsuki had way too much fun giving me pleasure the other night"

She sure did.

And Shizuru couldn't deny it, she sure did as well. It was a sight of Natsuki she was sure she had never seen.

"And besides, aren't we meeting your parents today? Shouldn't we start getting ready?" The brunette kissed the tip of Natsuki's nose and then started to crawl out of the sea of silky, white sheets, started to crawl out of the comfortable bed.

Yes, they were meeting Natsuki's parents today. Only that she hasn't called them to tell them she was home, so they still had time for some sexy fun. Her parents could wait.

Once Shizuru was out of bed, "I'm going to take a bath" She slowly removed her oversized, super soft, t-shirt and tossed it on Natsuki's face, now only in her sexy panties, totally topless, "Natsuki can join me if she wants" And then slowly made her way to the restroom, looking over her shoulder to meet the blushing blunette's gaze one more time before disappearing inside, not bothering to close the door behind her knowing that her lover would soon follow.

Natsuki involuntarily swallowed, her heart and libido raising again.

She was about to hurry out of bed and head to the restroom when she heard a couple of knocks on the door.

\- Knock -

\- Knock -

And she couldn't help and raise a curious, fine brow, unsure of who could be at the other side of the door.

She crawled out of bed and made her way to the door. She peaked through the hole, … _Oi..._ and cringed at the sight.

It was her mother.

She had found her.

… _How?..._

Natsuki quickly looked at her pajamas and made sure she looked presentable. All her buttons were buttoned. She just needed to fix her long, patterned pajama pants. She needed to pull it up a little and then tie the knot.

\- Knock -

\- Knock -

\- Knock -

Came the knocks again. She was taking too long, and her mother had always been very short on patience.

Natsuki cleared her throat and then went ahead and reached for the knob, twisting it open. " _Okaasan,_ what a nice surprise!" She loudly greeted while tensely rubbing her arm.

She was hoping that Shizuru had heard her, it was more of a warning for her, warning her not to come out of the restroom naked.

"I should be the one saying those words" Saeko said with a small smile while looking at her daughter from head to toe. She was taking in her appearance, noticing her reddened cheeks and messy, cobalt hair. It was already eleven thirty in the morning, she should've been dressed by now.

"H-How did you know I was here?"

You see, Natsuki didn't know that Saeko Kruger knew her secret alias. Saeko was contacted immediately when it was used in Duran.

Immediately.

"Did you think I wasn't going to find out? You're Duran's _hime,_ Natsuki. Out there, people might not know who you are, but in Duran everyone knows your face" Saeko nonchalantly lied while glancing inside the suite,

"I was in shock when one of my friends told me they had seen you checking-in at this hotel last night" Green eyes noticing the two suitcases, the unmade, _single_ , queen sized bed, the two trays with plates on the table, the grey t-shirt on the bed.

Her daughter wasn't alone, she had brought company with her. It now made sense to her why she hadn't gone home the night before and had opted to stay at a hotel instead.

 _That woman_ was in Duran, _that woman_ had come with her.

"I… I was about to call you… Would you like to come in?" The blunette opened the door wider for her mother.

Saeko took the offer and slowly walked inside the room, looking at her surroundings and taking it in. She made her way to the windows and opened the curtains, letting in the warm sunlight and soft breeze.

"I can't stay long, dear, your father is waiting downstairs" Green eyes then glanced at Natsuki and then the messy bed again, her features showed pure discontentment.

"Get ready and join us for lunch, would you, dear? I've reserved a private room for us downstairs"

"Okay" Was all Natsuki could say. She hadn't planned to meet her parents this early, but since they were already there, she guessed she had no choice.

She couldn't say no anyway, she wasn't allowed to say no.

Saeko then glanced towards the restroom, she could've sworn she had seen the door move just a moment ago. Could've sworn she felt someone's eyes on her.

And Natsuki, she followed her mother's intent gaze. " _Okaasan_ , Shizuru is joining me on this trip" She softly told her.

"She is?" But of course, she already knew that. The moment she had inspected the room she figured it out. She was only waiting for her daughter to confirm this, to say the sentence.

" _Hai_ , that's the reason I decided to stay at a hotel this time around, so we could be in the city. It's easier to show her around this way…" And then, added, " _Gomen_ for not contacting you earlier, I had a lot in my mind with the summit in Aries"

Yes, it's true, her parents lived a little far away from the city. But that was just an excuse she used to get off the hook, that wasn't the real reason she didn't stay at her parent's palace.

She wanted privacy, something she couldn't get in that place. And it was more for Shizuru's benefit anyway, to keep her away from her mother's prying eyes.

"Very well, _she_ can join us as well" Saeko then made her way to the door.

" _Okaasan…_ " Natsuki followed her mother there, "Shizuru's memories aren't one hundred percent yet, she remembers a few things, but not much" She then said, "Please don't ask her questions that might make her feel uncomfortable" And softly suggested, "Just try to make pleasant conversation with her… Please?"

… _Ah, so she still has amnesia…_ Saeko thought, _…No wonder she dared step foot in Duran…_

About a month ago or so, when the brunette had been found, Natsuki had called her to tell her the news. To tell her that Shizuru was back. She also told her that she had some memory problems, memory loss, but she thought she would be better by now.

"I can manage that" Saeko replied as she walked out the door, and then, "Please wear something appropriate, dear, you're in Duran now... Don't forget that you're a princess, and even though it is just a title, you still have a reputation to uphold" And with that said, she walked down the hall.

Natsuki sighed in defeat as she stared at her mother's retreating form.

… _So, that's where we are now_ … She couldn't help and frown, couldn't help and feel sad.

It's been a little over a year since she had last seen her, and the woman didn't even bother to give her a welcoming hug. She only gave her a small smile this time.

With the passing years this woman was becoming colder and colder, and Natsuki didn't understand why. Saeko wasn't like that when she was growing up, the woman was very loving and affectionate to her then.

Until she left for Garderobe, that is.

She guessed that Saeko was still upset at her, still upset that she had gone to Garderobe to become an Otome.

Duran, being the very small country that it is, had opted for not having an Otome two centuries ago, not having a need for them. They were a peaceful kingdom who didn't meddle in other Nations' affairs.

Like most Nations, they had a royal family. But that was just a title, a formality, a prestige, they held no power over the people or land. They did have a say, however, when it came to amending the countries laws. The amendments needed to be approved by them first.

Unlike the other nations, Duran held elections for a new Prime Minister every few years. They elected a new face, fresh blood that would listen and take into consideration the people's concerns. They also didn't have an army, have never gone to battle or war. They mostly kept to themselves, and very rarely did a Duranian leave Duran to settle somewhere else. They were very proud citizens, proud people. They were born there, lived there, and died there.

Natsuki only knew about Otomes because she learned about them in history class while growing up. She had even met one a few times because her father's friend from a neighboring Nation had one, and she always came with him when he visited. She greatly admired their grace, intelligence, and strength, and she wanted to be just like them one day.

Being an only child, her father tried his best to spoil her, to entertain her ideas and pleas. And one day, after much begging on her part, he had finally decided to let her attend the Academy once she was of age.

Her mother didn't approve with sending her that far away, and on top of that, to an all-girls school. She always heard that weird things happened at all-girls schools. Things that she didn't approve of. But she didn't have much choice on the matter, her husband was the head of the house, he always had the final word.

Before Natsuki left Duran for Wind Bloom, she told her mother that she'd become an Otome and that she'd be right back.

But then, she met Viola, Shizuru. And then, at the graduation ceremony, she was appointed as the Second Column. And then came her feelings for the Ruby eyed brunette.

It was like a domino effect, one thing right after the other. Everything had changed, things just didn't go as planned.

And honestly, Natsuki didn't think she could return to her previous life, the one she had before leaving Duran. Not after all she had learned and seen. Not after experiencing the outside world.

 **Meanwhile…**

Shizuru stood in front of the bathroom door with wide eyes and a shaky hand covering her lips.

The moment she had heard that voice, the moment she had peaked her head out of the restroom door to take a look at Natsuki's mother, an image, a memory came to view:

" _You need psychological help. Your feelings are repulsive, you're disgusting!"_

And after those words were said, voiced with pure disgust, came the slap.

\- Slap! -

She couldn't control her emotions, her usual calm demeanor gone. Something had come over her and she had slapped Saeko Kruger very hard across the cheek, instantly silencing her.

" _My daughter is not like you, she does not share your lifestyle. She will never reciprocate those feelings"_

Shizuru must've been twenty-one, no more than twenty-two years of age in that vision.

It was her second visit to Duran. Natsuki had taken a holiday and had asked Shizuru if she wanted to join her. They were friends back then, colleagues and good friends. They held feelings for one another, but they kept it hidden from one another, they hadn't expressed what they felt yet.

Natsuki's mother saw it, noticed it. Noticed the stolen glances and longing stares. Noticed their affinity, their interaction, their closeness, and she didn't like it at all. She could sense where it would lead and decided to stop it right away by confronting Shizuru on their last day in Duran.

And after everything was said and done, she asked Shizuru never to step foot in her country again. That she wasn't welcomed anymore.

After that trip, Shizuru never returned.

Shizuru took a step back, and then another and another, until she had reached the white, ceramic bathtub. She sat there, sat at the edge of it, _…I shouldn't be here…_ The hand that was covering her mouth was now resting on her rapidly beating chest. _…Natsuki must not know what happened between her mother and I that day…_

Yes, if Natsuki knew, she was sure she would've told her, would've insisted that she'd stay in Aries. Natsuki herself had said three days ago, when she had first told her about this trip, that she had stopped joining her on her visits to Duran, that she just preferred not to come anymore.

And now she remembers why.

That woman, she wasn't a very nice woman. She had said horrible things to her. That woman would never approve of their relationship, she was homophobic.

\- Knock -

\- Knock -

"Shizuru, can I come in?"

Came the blunette's muffled voice.

" _H-Hai_ , just a moment…" Shizuru went ahead and turned off the water. She had been distracted and didn't notice that it had almost reached the very top of the tub, it was about to spill all over the floor.

Her hand reached out for a shiny lever on the wall, pulling it, flushing the water. She had heard the conversation, had heard what Natsuki's mother had said, so there was no time for a long, relaxing bath.

She went ahead and opened the door for Natsuki, she had locked it in panic earlier.

"We should shower quickly" Natsuki let her know once she was inside and started to rapidly get rid of her pajamas and undergarments. "My parents are waiting downstairs, they'd like us to join them for lunch"

And as Shizuru silently watched Natsuki undress and heard her talk, she tried her best to mask her feelings and smiled at whatever she said.

 **About Thirty Minutes Later…**

\- Ting -

Natsuki stepped out of the elevator with a quiet Shizuru walking behind her.

"You don't need to be nervous, you've met them before" Natsuki muttered as they walked, eyeing the woman's behavior curiously. She hadn't said much since she joined her in the shower.

Before they reached the restaurant, Shizuru stopped walking and grabbed Natsuki by the arm, making her face her direction.

"Natsuki, do I have to join you on this lunch?" She softly asked, somewhat speaking her mind, then quickly added: "What I mean to say is, you mentioned that you haven't seen your parents in a very long time, isn't it best to keep this lunch a family affair?" And to sound even more convincing, "I'm sure you and your parents have a lot to talk about, I'd only be in the way…" And then, "I can join you at another time" She could make up a sudden illness for dinner time if she had to.

Shizuru couldn't wait for tomorrow to come, that's when they would head back to Garderobe. Shizuru really wanted to go home.

"You won't be in the way" Natsuki said, a small frown on display. And since Shizuru still showed hesitance, Ruby eyes avoiding eye contact, "Shizuru, you don't have to join me if you don't want to… I should've asked you first, _gomen_ " It would've been nice to have all the people she loved sitting at the same table and eating together for once. But she guessed that wasn't going to happen today.

"It's just…" Shizuru wanted to tell Natsuki about what she had remembered when she saw Saeko, but then thought that if she didn't do so in the past, she wasn't going to do it now. This would only hurt Natsuki, and she didn't want to be the cause of that pain. "Next time, ne? It's better this way" Her right hand lifted a little, her index finger softly touching Natsuki's hand for a few seconds.

Natsuki softly nodded, "Okay" Her cheeks pink because of the small, comforting gesture. "Order room service if you wish, and try the cold soba, this hotel has the best cold soba in all of Earl" She whispered the suggestion to her, watching as Shizuru took a step closer.

" _Hai_ , I'll keep that in mind" Shizuru truly smiled at her, her hands going up to Natsuki's white, fitted shirt and unbuttoning one of the top buttons, showing her crescent moon necklace, she was still wearing it.

It was too hot of a day for the shirt to be buttoned up that high, the woman was going to suffocate.

And Duran was an inferno in the summertime. How these people got used to this climate was beyond her imagination.

"I still think you should've worn one of my sundresses, I don't think your mother will approve of this outfit, Natsuki… It's not very _hime_ like" Shizuru said as her eyes scanned the blunette's form one more time.

… _She'll probably blame me for this…_ Shizuru thought. The woman hated her enough already, she didn't want to add more to that hatred.

Natsuki's eyebrows raised, looking down at her own outfit. "What do you mean? I'm wearing Duran's colors today" Yes, a white shirt, navy blue skinny jeans, and glossy, pink flats. She also wore a thin belt and had her hair up in a high ponytail, silver pin on the usual side.

She thought she seemed girly today. Not that she wasn't typically a feminine woman, she was, she just thought the pink shoes made her seem extra feminine since it was a color she didn't wear that often. It added a certain softness to the outfit.

"Besides," Natsuki then muttered with a light blush, looking away, "Your dress won't fit well in _that_ area"

Shizuru smirked while openly staring at Natsuki's bosoms, a hand on her chin as if contemplating on what to say next.

"Shizuru, stop it" Natsuki narrowed her eyes at her.

" _Fufu_ , _kannin na_ , my mind goes places sometimes" When she noticed the blunette's questioning stare, she added, "It's hard to explain" And then, "Natsuki should go, she's kept her parents waiting long enough"

Natsuki sighed, "Okay…" And reached her back pocket for their room keycard, "Here's the key" She handed it to Shizuru, her thumb caressing her hand in the brief exchange.

She felt her blush intensifying and she didn't know why. She had done that on purpose, touched her on purpose. And the touch wasn't even long, it was only like four seconds max. "I'll be up in a couple of hours… See you soon" And then she turned around and slowly took her leave, giving a small wave and a smile before going inside the restaurant.

"Too _kawaii_ , ne" Shizuru couldn't help and let out because of her lover's shyness, her sweetness. She was too sweet sometimes.

She stood there a little longer and then headed the blunette's direction. She wanted to take a peak, to see how Natsuki interacted with her family. She wondered if her father was strict with her, if her mother ever smiled or showed affection.

She stood outside, by the door, staying hidden, and watched from a distance as Natsuki greeted her parents, bowing slightly and nervously smiling. She was saying something, Shizuru thought that perhaps she was apologizing for her lateness and explaining why she couldn't attend the lunch.

She then watched with a smile as Natsuki's father stood from his seat and gave her a bear hug, lifting her up in the process. He was tall, thin and handsome, sporting a lot of grey hairs, so Natsuki must've inherited her height from her mother, Shizuru thought.

And then, she watched as Natsuki took the seat in front of her parents, crossing one leg over the other as she conversed with them, hands on her lap.

Ruby eyes noticed that Saeko wasn't smiling, but there was a softness in her features as she listened to Natsuki talk. It seemed that she was happy that her daughter was with them, was happy to see her. She had gotten a different impression from what she had heard in the room this morning, from the tone, the atmosphere felt different somehow.

Perhaps it was only her that brought that nasty side of her, perhaps Saeko just didn't want her daughter to be in love with a woman.

Shizuru was about to take her leave, having seen enough, but when she turned around she bumped into a hasty, tanned, handsome young man.

"A-Ah, _gomen nasai_ " Takeda nervously apologized, bowing to the brunette. He had a very large bouquet of flowers in his hands.

" _Ie_ , it's my fault" Shizuru replied with a warm smile. "I should've been more careful, _kannin na_ "

Once Takeda took a good look at her, once he saw her face, "Y-You're Viola-san, the Bewitching Smile Amethyst" He mumbled in awe, never having seen an Otome in person.

Shizuru knew the name of her Gem, but not once in the past month had she been addressed in that way. " _Ara~_ , _hai_ , that would be me…" And then, "Pardon the question, but, have we met before?"

"Ah, no… I've seen you on TV a few times" Was the excited reply, "You're always standing next to Natsuki _hime_ on televised programs" and then, he asked, "Will you be joining us for lunch?" She was Natsuki's friend, and Natsuki was in town and having lunch in this very hotel, it was only logical that she would be joining them.

Shizuru raised a curious eyebrow, silently analyzing this man. "Unfortunately, no, I'm not feeling very well. I was actually on my way to my room"

Takeda frowned, "I'm sorry to hear that" Then, added, "You must know the princess well. Do you think she'll like these?" He showed her the flowers, then mumbled, "I don't know what kind of flowers she likes"

Shizuru eyed the bouquet of flowers, eyebrows raising. It was a very, very colorful bunch, and it looked like he couldn't make up his mind and had picked a stem of each kind of flower the shop had in stock. It just didn't look so good. It was frantic and unorganized, in a way, representing his nervousness. This arrangement wouldn't impress a dead cockroach.

"It's… Interesting" Kyoto-ben calmly let out, "But Natsuki prefers flowers with less vivid colors" When the sentence left her lips, _…Ara? She does?..._ She asked herself, unsure where that answer came from. "If memory serves me right, Jasmines are her favorite" Shizuru couldn't help and openly smile this time, showing a little bit of her perfect, white teeth, realizing that she remembered.

She remembered!

Shizuru grabbed Takeda by the arm, masking her excitement. "Follow me, stranger-han"

"U-Um… Where are we going, Viola-san?" He couldn't help and ask; the restaurant was in the opposite direction. "I'm already very late, I mustn't keep the royals waiting"

"Do not worry, it'll only take a second… There's a flower shop in this hotel, I'm going to help stranger-han exchange his bouquet for one of my choosing, one that Natsuki will love"

She wasn't going to be in that lunch in body, but her presence would be there somehow, even if it was in the form of flowers.

Shizuru had an idea of why this man was there. Natsuki's parents must've set her up on a date without telling her, and Shizuru was sure this was not the first time. And this man's outfit and behavior, the way he talked about Natsuki with those puppy eyes, made her think so. He seemed to like her a lot.

He also seemed like a nice, harmless guy. Seemed like a good man, so Shizuru decided to take it easy on him. She couldn't blame him for Natsuki's parents' decisions, for this date, or whatever this was. He didn't know that Natsuki was already in a relationship. And even if she weren't, unfortunately for him, he was no match for her, and she knew it. She'd beat him any day.

Natsuki loved her, she had no doubt about it. This guy was wasting his time.

 **Sometime Later…**

About twenty minutes after Takeda had joined the royal family for lunch, Saeko had dragged her husband, Natsu, out of the private room, saying she had spotted someone they knew.

… _How convenient…_ Natsuki let out a long sigh.

She knew it was a complete and utter lie. Her mother had done that so that she and this odd, twitchy, spiky haired man could get to know one another, so that they could privately talk.

She couldn't believe her mother had done this to her again, had set her up on another blind date. She had told her repeatedly that she wasn't interested, that she didn't want to meet anyone, that she didn't have the time. She was an Otome, a Column, the Headmistress of Otome school, she couldn't think about these things right now. She had repeatedly told her to stop.

But the woman never listens to her. Never.

So, after the third blind date, Natsuki decided to just go ahead and entertain her for a little while, not make a fuss about it anymore. She'd just sit there and pleasantly make conversation with the guy if she had to, that's all.

She didn't want to be rude to them, it wasn't their fault. And she always made herself perfectly clear to them, always told them from the very beginning that she wasn't interested, that she was only there to please her mother, to make her happy. They could either walk out or eat a free meal, the choice was up to them. That was all they were going to get from her.

Natsuki's right hand rested on the round table, her index finger lightly tapping it. She wore a neutral expression, Emerald eyes staring at nothing in particular outside the window.

Things between them had been going so well. They were having such a nice conversation, and she had been in such good spirits until this man showed up to ruin it.

She has been alone with this guy for five minutes now and she hasn't uttered a word to him. She didn't have it in her to talk, she was too upset at her mother to talk. And this guy, he seemed like a nice, honest guy, and she didn't want him to get the wrong impression by trying to make conversation with him. She didn't want him to get his hopes up.

"N-Natsuki _hime_ " Takeda nervously said as he stared at the silent blunette.

"Kruger-san is fine" Natsuki absentmindedly replied, not leaving her stare from the view outside.

She didn't like to be called princess. She didn't like it when she was a little girl, she didn't like it now. That will never change.

"K-Kruger-san" Takeda shyly said again while staring at the blunette's face. "I… I really like you, Kruger-san"

Natsuki's eyebrows furrowed by the sentence, her tapping coming to a stop. Emerald eyes were now on the blushing man, "What do you like about me? You don't even know me" came the husky, serious answer.

"I-I know enough" Takeda mumbled, blush in place. "And…" He started to reach for Natsuki's right hand that was still resting on the table, but Natsuki moved it and rested it on her lap instead. "And if you let me court you" He continued, "I'm sure we could get to know one another, you could learn to love me" She was called _Ice Princess_ in Duran for a reason.

Apparently, after countless dates, no one could win her cold heart. He was sure that his love was warm enough to change that, warm enough to get through her icy exterior.

But Natsuki was anything but, Shizuru could vouch for this.

"You do know I'm an Otome, right?" She asked with a sense of curiosity, both hands now crossing below her chest.

"Yes, I know!"

He had said it so suddenly, and with so much enthusiasm, that Natsuki's soul almost jumped out of her body.

"I know you are an Otome, and- and I'd wait forever for you! However long it takes!"

Natsuki raised yet another curious, fine brow. This guy was quite a character. Really.

"I wish to marry you and have many children with you!" Takeda quickly left his seat and got down on one knee, clumsily grabbing her hand.

"Kruger-san! Please be my wife!" The other hand had reached for the flowers and was now handing them to her. His eyes were tightly closed, and his face couldn't take any more color or sweat. He was super nervous, super red.

" _N-Nani?!_ " Natsuki's right eye twitched, her mouth slightly agape, her cheeks sporting a hint of pink by the sudden turn of events.

She abruptly got up from her seat, quickly retrieved her hand, and placed some much-needed distance between them.

What the hell was wrong with this guy? Was he crazy? They've just met!

"Please get up, you're making a fool of yourself!" She said to him through gritted teeth, trying very hard not to punch him back to reality.

This wasn't a fairytale.

Really, what did he expect? That she'd fall in love with him in an instant and say yes? What kind of fantasy was this guy living in?

"P-Please, Kruger-san! Please give me a chance!" He begged again, both of his hands holding onto the bouquet now, practically begging her to take it. "I'll be the best, most loving husband, I-I promise!"

And Natsuki, now that she was looking at the flowers more closely, now that she was being hit with its relaxing scent, "Masashi-kun, how… how did you know to get these flowers?" She relieved the bouquet from his hands and inhaled its scent. "These are my favorite"

No one knew those were her favorite. No one. No one except for one person.

Takeda blinked a few times, his face was still facing the ground, not looking at Natsuki in the eyes.

Didn't she hear everything he had just said? His love confession?

" _E-Etto_ … Your Otome friend, Viola-san" He muttered to her, "I bumped into her on my way here, she- she picked those out for you"

"Shizuru" Natsuki closed her eyes and smiled, _…You remembered…_ inhaling the calming scent once again.

Back at Garderobe, in the moon garden near their quarters, Shizuru had planted bushes and bushes of this flower for her, because she had mentioned that she loved them.

This was a lovers' flower, a flower to be admired in the shadows, in the moonlight, when most lovers spent time whispering sweet nothings under the stars.

And its scent was heavenly, just heavenly. In the night time, the cool breeze would lead the scent right into her bedroom, helping her relax.

She loved the shape of the flower, loved the white color, and loved what it symbolized. It symbolized romance, beauty, and sensuality. It symbolized love and purity.

"They're beautiful…" Natsuki told him while slowly inhaling its scent again, "But I can't accept them" And then, she handed them back to him. "Please go home, Masashi-kun… I can tell you're a nice man, but I'm not the right woman for you. I'm sorry"

Natsuki watched as he slowly got up and quietly took his leave after his initial shock had gone.

He looked so heartbroken, Natsuki thought, but she was sure that it would pass. He wasn't a bad looking guy, he was attractive, and boy did he have spirit, he would find someone else to love, to fixate on in no time.

Natsuki sat down again and waited for her parents to return. They'd been gone for a while now, she was sure they'd be back soon.

All the while, as she sat there looking out the window, Natsuki couldn't contain the soft smile grazing her features.

They were small details, very small, but Shizuru remembered. Yesterday was the tea, today the flowers. Little by little, the pieces were coming together. Little by little, Shizuru was becoming herself again.

"We're back~" Saeko happily sing-sang as she opened the door. And in an instant, that happiness was gone, "Natsuki, where's Masashi-kun?" She asked upon realizing that Natsuki was alone in the room.

"I sent him home" Was the calm, husky reply.

Saeko wasn't very happy to hear that. She walked over to the table but didn't bother to sit down.

"Why, Natsuki?" Saeko asked with a noticeable scowl. "Why did you send him home? He was a decent guy, a good guy. He really liked you"

And Natsuki stopped staring out the window and placed her attention on her mother. She sounded irritated, upset, just as she expected her to be. "Because he _is_ a decent guy, _okaasan_. I didn't want to waste his time"

"Saeko, darling, what's going on?" Natsu, Natsuki's father, asked. The aura in the room, the one being produced by his wife, was a hostile one.

But Saeko ignored her husband, "Is it because of _that woman_?"

Natsuki's eyebrows furrowed by the question, and then asked two of her own: "What do you mean? What woman?"

" _That woman!_ " Saeko spat, a finger pointing up to the ceiling, "The one upstairs, in your hotel room… Ever since _that woman_ came into your life, you're a different person, you're someone I don't recognize"

Natsuki stared at her mother for a long moment. Confused yet panicked, Emerald eyes on furious green ones the whole time.

"You think I don't know what's going on between you and… _her_?" Saeko continued, "For years this has been going on. It's unacceptable. It's immoral. It's disgusting, Natsuki!" And when her husband tried to speak,

"Don't open your mouth, this is all your fault!" She immediately screamed at him while looking at him in the eyes, both her hands slamming on the table, the silverware making a slight clinking sound by the hard impact,

"You just had to send her to that godforsaken place! You just had to grant her every wish! You just had to! Don't you see what's happening? Your daughter is sick, Natsu, she thinks she has feelings for- for _that woman_!"

"Shizuru" Natsuki quietly said, now averting her mother's angry, questioning gaze. "H-Her name is Shizuru, _okaasan_ " She whispered: "It's not _that woman_ , or _she_ , or _her_. It's Shizuru… W-Why can't you ever say her name?"

But Saeko didn't reply to her. Just stared at her with so much anger and rage.

"Natsuki? What your mother is saying, about you and Viola-san, is this true?" Natsu softly asked the younger blunette.

Natsuki slowly nodded once. Her lips quivered, and her hands trembled, turning into tight fists. And her eyes, her green eyes were shiny, glistening with unshed tears.

Natsuki just realized something, one thing:

" _Okaasan_ , all this time, you knew about Shizuru and I…" She couldn't bring herself to look at her mother in the eyes, she knew what she'd find there. That look. That look of disapproval, that look of disgust.

This made her realize, made her remember, that, ever since she was a little girl, her mother would make horrid, offensive comments whenever she'd spot a same sex couple. She didn't even try to hide it, the look of disgust. She'd have that look on her face and she'd say whatever came to mind, not caring if they could hear her or not. Not caring if she hurt their feelings or not.

Growing up, she always told her that it was wrong, that bad things happened to people like that, that they would never find happiness. Never. And she was too innocent, too naïve, too young, so she believed her.

… _No wonder I'm messed up…_ And now that Natsuki realizes where her issues originated, she couldn't help and feel heartbroken, sad.

It was her mother. Her mother did this to her.

Her mother broke her, made her feel insecure, perhaps even shame that she had these feelings for Shizuru.

"Y-You knew that I held feelings for her…" Natsuki continued, trying to be strong, trying very hard not to cry in front of her parents,

"These past two years while Shizuru was missing, you knew that I had feelings for her" She closed her eyes and faced down again, her tears were now freely caressing her face, landing one by one on her jeans and her fisted hands,

"I-I thought I had lost her, I was desperate. There were days I couldn't even leave my bed… Whenever you called me, y-you knew that I was hurting, you knew that I was in pain, and not once, not once did you acknowledge my feelings. N-Not once, _okaasan_. Not once did you try to comfort me or asked me how I was doing" She wiped her tears away with the back of her hand, "You just simply ignored it. You were probably happy that Shizuru was gone"

"Is this true, Saeko?" Natsu couldn't believe what he was hearing, what was happening at this moment.

"Our daughter is sick, Natsu" Saeko looked at her daughter's teary face, not softening, not even a little bit. She loved her daughter, she really did, but she couldn't accept this, this indecency of hers. She didn't raise her to be this way. "She needs help. With the proper treatment, with professional help, she'll be her old self again"

"She's not sick, Saeko!" There was a look of horror on Natsu's face. This woman, this wasn't his wife. He didn't know who this woman was at all. The things she was saying, the horrors, who did he marry?

"Feelings come and go, Natsu, what she thinks she feels for _that woman_ is no exception. Those feelings will fade"

"You're right, feelings do come and go" Natsuki whispered, still unable to look at her mother in the eyes. "But not with Shizuru, these feelings will never fade. It feels right with her. Anywhere with her feels right. I… I love her. I will always love her, no matter what"

Saeko scoffed, "Love? You think you're in love? What do you know about love?" And then, "What you need is to permanently come back to Duran" Saeko ignored her words, "You need to forget about this Otome business already. You're twenty-eight years old now, you need to come home, get married, have children. Only then you'll have a chance at happiness" and then, "Only then you will forget about _that woman_ , that disgusting whor-"

\- Slap! -

Natsuki's hands and lips trembled, her cheeks pink. She took a deep, deep, shaky breath, trying to compose herself, her emotions.

Saeko's loud voice, her temperament, her tone, she knew what she was going to say. She stood up so fast, and her hand had met her mother's cheek before that nasty word could be produced. She wasn't going to allow her to say it. She wasn't.

"D-Don't you dare insult Shizuru" She told her mother, who in turn, looked at her with wide eyes. In shock.

Not in a million years Natsuki thought she'd raise a hand on her mother. Never. That is just something you don't do, not to your parents.

"You're my mother" Her voice broke, it was so soft, so raw and so soft, "a-and I love you, I will always love you… You can say whatever you want about me, I'm okay with that, I can take it, but not Shizuru… All she's ever given me is companionship, friendship and love. She doesn't deserve to be insulted like this"

She took a step back, slowly leaving the table. She felt like she had no strength, like her legs were going to give out on her any given second. She was heartbroken, so heartbroken. There was no way to express the disappointment she felt in her heart, there was no way to express how she felt by her mother's rejection.

"Natsuki…" Natsu was about to reach out to his daughter. This sight of her, her pain, it was unbearable to watch. How did things come to this?

"I'm sorry I'm not the daughter you wanted me to be" Natsuki interrupted her father, not looking at either of her parents in the eyes.

"I-I'm sorry I'm a disappointment" She kept her gaze down the whole time,

"I won't bother you with my presence anymore, I'll leave Duran as soon as I possibly can…" And then,

"G-Goodbye" She walked out of the room, every step shattering a piece of her heart.

 **About Ten Minutes Later…**

Shizuru stood in the balcony, quietly staring at the lively view.

Despite the extreme, uncomfortable weather, she couldn't deny that Duran was beautiful. It seemed like a prosperous country, a wealthy country. The people always dressed nicely and all the people she had talked to so far seemed well educated. And the city, it had many well-maintained, beautiful structures and buildings, both very old and very new. When you walked around the city, when you walked around certain streets, it felt as if you were transported back in time with the beautiful, red-ish brick floor and the old style, street lanterns.

There was a lot of culture there, a lot of tradition and history there. She could see herself living there weren't for the weather.

\- Knock -

Shizuru faced the door, she thought she had heard a knock. It was so soft, and only one knock, perhaps she had heard wrong?

\- Knock -

And a few seconds later, there it was again, the knock, she hadn't imagined it the first time.

As she walked over to the door, Ruby eyes glanced at the clock near the TV. _…It can't be Natsuki…_ She thought, it had only been an hour since they parted ways. She was sure the luncheon would take a lot longer than that, especially since they had that extra guest.

When she peaked through the hole on the door, she found that it was in fact Natsuki that was there, she was rubbing her eyes. _…Something went wrong…_ Was the immediate thought and she quickly opened the door.

When she opened it, when she saw her face clearly, noticed her reddened eyes and nose and cheeks, the sadness in her face, she pulled her in for a soft embrace, closing the door behind her.

The woman was heartbroken, every inch of her body screamed this.

And then she heard the woman sob as she held on tighter to her. She felt as the blunette's legs couldn't take it anymore, they were like jelly. So, she went down with her, sitting on the ground.

"It'll be okay, Natsuki" Shizuru whispered to her as she heard her pour her heart out, heard her muffled cries, " _Kannin na_ "

This was the reason she had decided to keep that event hidden from her long ago. To prevent this, postpone it somehow. Because she knew how hard Natsuki would take it.

Natsuki was a strong woman. She really was. She loved her family, loved her parents, she held them in such high regard. They could do nothing wrong, not in her eyes. But Shizuru knew, she knew no matter how strong Natsuki may appear to be, she knew this would break her heart. She knew. She knew the disappointment she would feel when she learned about her mother, about her mother's feelings and beliefs. She was hoping that Saeko would take it easy on Natsuki, since she was her daughter, her own flesh and blood, but apparently not.

Shizuru stayed with her this way for about an hour or so. Natsuki's head was resting on her lap now, she had finally stopped crying, only because she had fallen asleep.

Shizuru caressed her face, her fingers softly running through her cobalt hair for a long while. And then, when she knew she wouldn't stir, she carried her to bed.

\- Knock -

\- Knock -

\- Knock -

"Natsuki"

That muffled voice was a male voice. A husky, male voice. Similar to Natsuki's.

"Darling, please open the door"

Shizuru quietly made her way there. She opened it, but only slightly. If this man was here to hurt Natsuki there was no way she was going to let him in.

"Viola-san" Natsu greeted with the best smile he could muster under the circumstances, "It's very lovely to see you again… Is my daughter here?"

Shizuru opened the door wider, it seemed like he meant no harm. "King Kruger" She greeted in hushed Kyoto-ben, her face softening a little. "Natsuki finally fell asleep"

Natsu frowned and then pursed his lips. He stayed silent for a little while.

"I owe you an apology, Viola-san" He finally said, "for my wife, I honestly didn't know about any of this. I can only imagine how hard she was on you" And then, "If you don't mind, can I have a moment with Natsuki? A moment in private? I won't wake her, I'll wait until she does on her own"

Shizuru glanced over at the bed were Natsuki peacefully lay. "Alright" She gave in, "Could you please tell Natsuki that I'll be in the park?"

"Of course," He gave her a genuine smile as he stepped inside the room, "Viola-san…" Then said as he watched her grab a keycard from the table, "I want to thank you, for taking care of Natsuki all these years... You could've told her about Saeko, but you chose not to, that speaks volumes of your feelings for her"

"All I want is her happiness" Shizuru softly smiled in return, "She's all I have in this world" She didn't just say it, she really meant it. She meant every word of it.

"Thank you" He said again, and then watched as she took her leave, closing the door on the way out.

He took a seat in the balcony, one leg crossing over the other. From time to time his blue eyes glanced over at his sleeping daughter.

He couldn't believe that he had been blind all these years. Couldn't believe that his own daughter didn't feel comfortable enough to share this part of her life with him. Saeko had done a number on her, of that he was certain, and he felt guilty because if he were more present, more involved, less aloof, he could've prevented Saeko from doing this to her, from hurting her.

He knew that Saeko was a hard woman. A difficult woman. He knew this. She had a difficult temperament, a strong character. And she was stubborn when it came to her beliefs. But he knew that she loved their daughter. How she could treat her that way, say those awful things about her, was beyond him.

Perhaps with time, she would soften, change her way of thinking, and realize that this, that their daughter's choice of partner, wasn't a bad thing, not as long as she was happy.

And with Shizuru, it seemed like she was. Whenever she came up in conversation Natsuki's eyes lit up.

"Shizuru?" About forty minutes later, Natsuki stirred, finding herself alone in bed. She raised to a sitting position and then noticed the male figure in the balcony, the male figure that was now slowly heading her direction.

"You're finally awake" Natsu smiled at his daughter. She looked so small to him today for some reason, so small this way, so fragile, like when she was a child. Her confident stance no longer present.

" _Otousan_ " Natsuki quickly left the bed, "Where's-"

"Violan-san went out for some fresh air" He quickly eased her worries, "She's at the park, we can see her from here, come take a look" He guided her to the balcony and pointed to where Shizuru was.

They could clearly see what she was doing from this distance. She was talking to a group of kids, it seemed like they were teaching her how to build a kite.

There were many kites adorning the sky this afternoon. It was a little windy today, perfect for it, and Duranian kids loved playing with kites.

"I've been keeping an eye on her for you, I know she's not well" Then, he softly added, "I noticed she's very friendly"

Natsuki smiled, both her hands on the wooden railing, " _Hai_ , she is… It's a little annoying sometimes"

Natsu chuckled at this, having a feeling that his daughter was the jealous type. He stared for a little while longer and then let out a soft sigh.

"I want to talk to you, Natsuki, come sit with me" He grabbed her hand and led her to the patio chairs. Once they were seated, "I'm sorry, Natsuki… Your mother, she said many harsh things earlier... Give her some time, she loves you, she does, I know she'll turn around"

Natsuki didn't say anything, couldn't even look him in the eyes, only frowned.

"I want you to know that I am very proud of you and of everything you have accomplished. You are not a disappointment, you're anything but, understand?"

Natsuki softly nodded.

"I wish I was more aware of what was going on… Had I accompanied your mother whenever she visited you at Wind Bloom, perhaps that would've made a difference, perhaps I wouldn't have been so oblivious of your feelings" He reached for her chin and gently tapped it a couple of times, wanting her to lift her head, to make eye contact with him. "Your love is beautiful, Natsuki, no matter what people say. It's beautiful"

" _Arigato_ , _otousan_ " She weakly smiled at him.

"Earlier you said that you loved Viola-san, is this really true?"

" _H-Hai_ " Came the soft, honest answer. A faint blush accompanied it.

"Then I think you should have this" From his left, chest pocket, he took out a ring. It was a beautiful ring. It was made of white gold, had a large, Sapphire gemstone, and small diamonds surrounded it. It was delicate and very beautiful.

Natsuki couldn't help and swallow, rendered speechless.

She recognized the ring. It was the Kruger Family ring, the one passed down from generation to generation for hundreds and hundreds of years. It dated to the time before they had landed on planet Earl. This ring came from planet Earth. Its raw materials, its precious metals, the craftsmanship, it's all from Earth.

"Why are you so surprised, you are the next in line for the crown, aren't you?" He asked with furrowed brows.

"I-I know, but, I thought that-"

"I have no sons" Natsu interrupted her, knowing very well what she was going to say.

Usually, the first-born Kruger male inherited the ring to give to his wife. And when they had children, and that child was of age to marry, which in Duran was now age 18, the current wearer takes it off and hands it back to the king, only to be given to the next in line. When the next in line is ready to marry, the king hands it over.

But as Natsu said, he has no sons, so…

"If you were to marry a man, then it'd be your turn to wear the ring, it is far too precious not to be worn. But since it's very clear that that's not happening, you should keep the tradition alive..." He lovingly smiled at her, "When the time comes, when you're ready, propose to her with this ring" And then, "Give her our name, make her a Kruger, it would be an honor" He grabbed Natsuki's hand and placed the ring there, in the middle of her palm, then closed the hand for her since she still seemed to be in shock.

"And when you have children, make sure you carry the first child. You know, for the Kruger blood. It's your turn to keep the Kruger tradition going"

Natsuki's hand involuntarily twitched when hearing this, "Y-You're putting too much pressure on me" She muttered to him. "And I'm not coming back here" That's true, she's not planning on returning to Duran, not to live. Her life is in Wind Bloom now.

"Darling, no matter where you go you're still a Kruger. You carry the blood, that will not change" He casually crossed one leg over the other.

"Now, I know all about Viola-san, your colleague and friend… But if you don't mind, I'd like you to tell me about Viola-san, the woman you love" He softly smiled at her, at how shy she seemed right now, this was a side of her he'd never seen before.

"What is your love like, Natsuki? How does she make you feel?"

 **\- 0 -**

* * *

 **Thanks for Reading!**

 **And thanks for the Reviews/Comments**

 **So, I didn't think I would write a 'coming out' chapter for Natsuki, but the writing headed that direction. I don't control my typing, my fingers do it on their own (They are possessed! LOL) So I'm surprised by this long chapter.**

 **I meant to give a small background of why she has issues, but like I said, the writing went somewhere else.**

 **Now Natsuki knows why she gets anxious about showing affection in public. It doesn't necessarily mean that she is cured, she's far from cured, it just means that she knows where it stems from and how it got there. That it just didn't come out of nowhere (Saeko is to blame for this) She still has to work on getting better.**

 **Also, the Shizuru-Takeda interaction, I don't see Shizuru jealous unless she feels threatened somehow. She knows Natsuki loves her, so there's no reason to feel jealous of this guy. She didn't display jealousy in Mai Hime, she was actually very nice to him there and always teased him since she knew his feelings for Natsuki. I'm sure it wouldn't be any different in Mai Otome had he been around.**

 **Now that I made some progress with Natsuki, I need to work on Shizuru.**

 **Let me know what you guys think.**

 **"For the love of ShizNat"**


	11. Chapter 11

**In the Darkness**

 **A Mai Otome ShizNat Story**

 **Chapter 11**

 **Two Weeks Later…**

"You're so brilliant and so beautiful… Simply perfect" The young man sighed as he looked at the screen, admiring the brunette. "We really shouldn't have let you go, we could've learned so much from you once we got you to talk…"

He was going over the footage from this morning, from when they had gone _in the dark_. He had it paused at a specific frame, a specific spot.

Before commanding the brunette to leave her bedroom to continue searching for the source, he would always have her stop in front of her vanity, in front of the mirror. He'd have her stop there at least for a second, wanting to look at her.

He didn't need more than a second, more than a glance. He knew he could pause it and see her whenever he wished later on.

It's been two weeks since _the incident_ happened, two weeks since his father had caught him _in the dark_ without permission.

Ever since that night, his father wouldn't leave him alone in the lab anymore. He wouldn't leave him alone with the equipment afraid he might try and connect again, afraid he might try to harm the brunette's current bed companion.

He wasn't allowed to go _in the dark_ for a whole week after that incident. Two times in a row he had disconnected suddenly, inappropriately, making him extremely tired and weak, so he was ordered to rest and to stay away from the lab.

When they started connecting again a week ago, they found that the brunette was back in her original setting, so they got to work right away, not knowing where they would wake up the next day.

They've been connecting almost every night since, resting every three days not wanting to stress the brunette's body and mind too much.

"Any progress with today's footage, son?"

"Y-Yes…" The sudden voice startled him. His father had always been very light on his feet, so he could never tell whenever he walked into a room.

He quickly pressed the fast-forward button, not wanting to be caught staring at the brunette again.

His father didn't like it when he did this, when he stared at her. He said he was becoming too attached to her, and that he needed to focus, to not lose sight of what was important: finding _the source_. They needed the source if they were going to survive, if they were going to leave this wretched, dying world.

"Take a look at this, father" The son said, pausing the footage at the desired frame. When his father was next to him, staring at the screen, he pressed play.

In the footage, the brunette was walking in what seemed to be the halls of a school, an Academy. And on the walls there were posters, posters of women equipped in their Robes.

"Do you see the pattern, father?" The son softly asked. He was a very soft-spoken guy, never got angry or raised his voice.

"They're all… female" The father whispered in realization, hazel eyes never leaving the small screen.

When they had done the blood-wash, when they had taken those curious particles from the brunette's blood, they processed them and injected some of them into the young man, hoping to see a change, a spark in his vitals, hoping that he'd develop her abilities: peak human strength and self-healing.

But nothing occurred. There was no change. None at all.

They wondered what made the brunette special. Wondered why the particles bonded with her, if something in her blood or her genes allowed her to be compatible with them.

But now they knew the answer to that question, it was gender related.

"Do we have any female guards in this facility, son?" The father asked. This was a great discovery, a step in the right direction.

"I believe so, yes" Was the soft answer.

"Perfect. Ask for a volunteer, have her meet us in the lab this afternoon" He commanded as he walked over to the large desk in the middle of the room.

He glanced upwards, towards the large screen, the one displaying the brunette's brain activity.

"Her memory progress seems to have stalled…" He muttered, wondering why it hadn't moved from forty percent in the past week.

"Perhaps our torture tactics are finally getting through to her" The son replied, blue eyes looking up at the screen as well, "Fear tends to delay memory progress"

This room, the one they were in at the moment, was the strategy room, where they looked at footage and gathered intelligence. The father looked at the recorded footage as well on his own time and drew a map of the place, of Garderobe, that's how they knew where they had been, and where they should search next.

The father looked down at the large map, both hands leaning on the table. There were some grey areas, but it was almost complete.

They still hadn't found where the source was located. There were many doors in this large facility with a lock system in place, a keypad lock. They didn't have the combination and hadn't gathered enough intelligence to unlock them. Anything could be behind those locked doors.

So far, they had an _almost_ perfect picture of what the Administration Building looked like since that's where they always originated. They had searched the entire first floor, which was mainly the quarters, and had searched all the floors above it.

They knew the source wouldn't be in any of those floors, they highly doubted it. The space was too open, and the source should be well protected, should be somewhere safe, somewhere underground.

They had searched almost the entire building except for the underground level. They needed a passcode to get there, or a card key, but they had no access to those yet.

Tonight, had been a little different from the other nights. While he was walking the usually quiet, empty halls of the Administration Building, a redhead caught the young man's attention. She was a distance away, yawning, walking with both hands behind her head. It looked like she was about to leave the place even though it was very late.

Attempting to hide and not be seen by her, he commanded the brunette to quietly open the nearest door, which led him to a garden. He decided to stay there for a little while. And with his father's permission, he left the premises, left the Administration area to venture elsewhere. That's how they ended up in the school building.

Getting there was not quick, was not easy, so he had to use a shortcut.

He walked through plants, through bushes of flowers, bushes of many different types of roses. If he followed the clear, brick path, it would've taken too long to get to the next building. And not to mention the brunette would have been spotted since the area was very open and the night was clear.

When he got there, he took his time. He was in a new environment, a new place. That's when he realized that they were in a school, because every door he opened led to a classroom.

He hadn't seen a classroom in so long. No one in his planet bothered going to school anymore, they had other more important things in mind. The outside air had too much radiation, was too polluted. And one of their moons was shattered to pieces, small chunks coming down and hitting the planet from time to time when it was too close to its orbit. They spent their time, their life underground on a man made regulated environment. They didn't know how much longer they'll be able to stay there.

He walked a little further, opening and closing doors along the way, that's how he reached the cafeteria.

And when he noticed that her movements were starting to become a little slow, that he was getting weaker; he glanced at the clock and noticed that time was almost up. The brunette's body was about to leave 'deep sleep' mode and he wouldn't be able to control her anymore.

This place was too big and there was not enough time to return her to her quarters. So, he did the best he could do; he commanded her to sit on one of the cafeteria chairs and had her lay her head on the table, leaving the brunette in the cafeteria and safely disconnecting there.

And they hoped that she would wake up on time and return to her quarters on her own, knowing that everyone would have many questions as to why she was sleeping there.

They decided they wouldn't risk it, that they wouldn't connect again for a couple of nights. They had other important things to do anyway now that they had found this new discovery, that these curious particles only bonded with the female gender.

If only they could modify it, change it...

"Let's go, son, we have work to do"

 **Meanwhile,**

 **Garderobe**

It was six forty in the morning when Natsuki had gotten the call; the call that they had found Shizuru sleeping in the school building, in the cafeteria to be precise.

"What? I'll be right there"

Natsuki had quickly hung up the phone and left her bed, not bothering to put on her slippers or grab her robe.

She ran towards the school building, hastily making twists and turns once she was inside. Turning corner to corner, going from hallway to hallway, going through many swinging doors, not stopping until she got to the brunette.

Once she had arrived there, she just stood there for a moment and stared. She took in the brunette's appearance with a puzzled expression, with furrowed brows.

It was clear that Shizuru had slept walked there. It was obvious.

The brunette was sitting there, leaning forward, her head resting on her arms on the table, and a faint breathing sound escaping her parted lips. She looked frazzled, totally frazzled. There were leaves and rose petals in her hair, a few minor scratches on her face, arms, and legs. And when Natsuki looked at the floor, when Emerald eyes settled on her bare feet, she noticed the smear of blood accompanied by dirt on the ground. It looked like she had walked right through the rose garden, right through the rose bushes. And if Natsuki remembered correctly, those roses were pretty, very beautiful, yes, but they also had a lot of thorns.

"We should wake her, we don't want the students to see her like this"

That was Yukariko Steinberg, she was the one who had found Shizuru there.

Classes start at eight o clock sharp and students would be roaming these halls soon, filling the cafeteria to eat their first meal of the day before heading to class. The cafeteria opened at seven each morning.

" _Hai_ " Natsuki let out, coming out of her stupor. "Yukariko-san, can you call Youko and have her meet us at medical bay?"

When the friendly, short haired woman nodded and started to walk away, Natsuki sighed and kneeled in front of the sleeping brunette.

"What am I going to do with you…" She let out another soft sigh, and then, "Shizuru" She called the brunette's name, a hand going for her bare shoulder, gently shaking her. "Shizuru, you need to wake up"

And within moments Shizuru slowly did. She heard her softly groan, softly complaint about something, and then watched her slowly blink. " _Ohayo,_ Shizuru" She smilingly greeted her, a hand caressing her face.

"Natsuki…" Kyoto-ben softly spoke, her words slurred and her voice a little hoarse because of her sleepiness, "Why are we in the cafeteria?" She slowly murmured as she sat up straight and started looking at her surroundings.

"Why do you think?" Was the gentle reply.

Shizuru's eyebrows furrowed, " _Ara~_ Again? It's the second time in less than three weeks" Or at least the second time she had been caught by the blunette.

Shizuru hasn't told Natsuki about that time she had slept walked in Aries the night before the summit. That was a scary night, she thought she had harmed the blunette.

And the blood, the blood in her hands and face, unbeknownst to Shizuru, it awoke something in her. After that night her nightmares started.

"We have to figure out what's causing you to sleepwalk" Natsuki stood and then grabbed the brunette's hand, helping her stand as well.

And once Shizuru was on her feet, she hissed in pain and quickly sat back down again. There was something on the heel of her foot, and it hurt, really hurt.

"Here, let me take a look" The blunette got down on one knee and gently reached for Shizuru's right leg. When she raised it, she couldn't help and grimace at what she had found there.

"You've got thorns and splinters digging into your skin, that's why there's so much blood on the ground" Natsuki told her. "This sleepwalking of yours, it's dangerous, Shizuru. You can get seriously hurt…" and then, "Maybe it's time to use the Nanoma-"

" _Ie_ , no needles, no injections" Shizuru quickly removed her leg from the blunette's hold and then raised again, hissing again because of the pain. But as long as she got her point across, as long as she seemed and sounded firm about this, about her decision, she could stand the pain.

"You need to stop being difficult about this" The blunette somewhat calmly let out, raising as well.

Every time she brought it up, every time she said the word Nanomachines, they ended up arguing about it.

"Once the Nanomachines are in your system, you'll heal quicker, things like these won't hurt you anymore" And then, "The process doesn't even hurt, you've done this before… You just-"

"Natsuki said that my opinion mattered, that I had a choice" Was the quick, angry response, "Back at the cabin, Natsuki said that I had a choice, or did Natsuki forget?"

"I know what I said, and you do. You do have a choice, Shizuru" Natsuki rubbed her eyes in irritation, one hand resting on her left hip.

"If you already know my answer, why do you keep insisting about this?"

"Because this is _your life_ we're talking about, Shizuru!" Natsuki's hands went up in the air in exasperation, not knowing how to get through to her, she made it impossible to do so. "Why is it so hard for you to unders-" And then, "Where are you going?!" She hissed at her through gritted teeth, arms on her sides, hands turning to fists. Shizuru had started walking away, well, more like _limping_ away mid conversation.

"Stop, Shizuru, you're only hurting yourself!" She followed her and grabbed her by the arm.

"Do not touch me" Kyoto-ben had sounded so calm, so, so calm, but there was a fire in her eyes. Angry Rubies on annoyed Emeralds when she said it again: "I told Natsuki not to touch me" And then, two seconds later, the hand was off her arm, she was free of her hold.

"I'm going to my room," She answered the blunette's previous question, "I am more than capable of taking care of my own wounds, I don't need Natsuki's help"

Natsuki pursed her lips, her cheeks burning up in annoyance. And when Shizuru started to walk away again,

"You're so stubborn and so infuriating! You're doing a fantastic job at driving me crazy, you know that?!" She shouted at her retreating form.

Whether done intentionally or unintentionally, Shizuru always got the better of her, made her quickly lose her temper.

She was normally a calm woman, a patient woman, a reasonable woman, she really was. Weren't for Shizuru she would win an award on all three counts.

But not today. Not right now. She was anything but those three things right now.

Emerald eyes watched as Shizuru limped away and she couldn't take it, couldn't hold it any longer, all logic and patience wearing thin. She quickly caught up to Shizuru and suddenly grabbed her, the brunette now over her shoulder.

" _A-Ara!_ What are you doing? Stop it!"

But Natsuki didn't listen to a word the brunette said,

"Natsuki, put me down, now!"

Didn't listen to any of her commands. She ignored her and kept walking, walking down the quiet halls of the Academy, heading towards the infirmary.

"Natsuki, I'm serious!"

When they had arrived at the infirmary, she headed straight for the controls of the Healing Chamber.

"Stop it!"

She clumsily pressed a few buttons, turning on the machine. Her hands were a little full, so it took a little longer than usual.

"N-Natsuki!"

And then she walked the twenty steps to the machine, the frantic brunette wriggling in her arms the whole time, trying to escape.

"S-Stop it, please!"

But Natsuki had had enough, "No, I need you to calm down and be quiet" She roughly lay her on the bed, on the chamber, and held her down. "You're going to listen to me now"

She didn't mean to be so rough on Shizuru, but sometimes she forgets her own strength, and she wasn't thinking clearly right now.

"You don't want to tell me why you wake up screaming in the middle of the night, okay, I accept that, I'm fine with that" Then added, "You won't let us use the Nanomachines on you, I'm fine with that too" She kept holding her down so that she wouldn't escape, watching as the chamber started closing, "But I'm not going to watch you with these cuts, watch you limping in pain the whole week, not when we have the technology to make you better in an instant" When the glass reached her, she let go of her and took a step back.

"Natsuki, let me out of here" Shizuru quickly raised, now on her knees, "Natsuki, open this thing" Both of her palms touching the glass, pushing it, trying to loosen it somehow, to open it.

"D-Don't do this, Natsuki" She told her, panicking, hearing the sounds, the noises the machine made before releasing the white vapor. "You said I had a choice, I-I didn't choose this, I don't want this!" She tightly closed her eyes, her hands now on her ears, covering them. "Y-You said I had a choice…" She repeated, whispered, talking over the voices she could hear inside her head.

Whenever she panicked, whenever she felt anxious, felt fear, she could hear the voices, could hear loud whispers, but they were not very clear. It was hard to make out what they said. If she focused, if she let go of her fears for just a moment, she probably would be able to understand them, to listen to what they said.

"Y-You said I had a choice" Shizuru could feel the vapor surrounding her now, could feel the cool air against her skin, "Y-You lied to me, Natsuki" She said again, a sob escaping her lips, "Y-You lied to me…" And then repeated, "You lied to me"

And Natsuki?

She stood there with trembling lips, and hands turned into fists, knowing very well the brunette will not forgive her for this, for forcing her in there.

She let her anger, let her impatience get the better of her. She wasn't thinking with her head.

" _Gomen,_ Shizuru" She said, her right hand now on the glass.

It was quiet inside the chamber now. She couldn't see inside, couldn't see the brunette, but she could hear her labored breathing, her small sobs from time to time.

To say that Natsuki was frustrated by the lack of answers was a _huge_ understatement.

When they got back to Garderobe from their trip, she thought that Shizuru would open up to her, confide in her, tell her about her dreams.

But Shizuru hasn't.

It's been two weeks since then and Shizuru hasn't.

And on top of that, Shizuru won't let Youko administer the Nanomachines into her bloodstream. She was basically not an Otome, she couldn't transform into her Robe. And now there's the issue of her sleepwalking, of her getting hurt while doing so. She hadn't seen her do that since that time at the cabin, she thought perhaps it had been a one-time thing. But apparently not since it also happened today.

There's also the issue of her resisting being treated. The issue of her lack of improvement in the memory front as of late. Her tiredness during the daytime. Her suddenly waking up from her naps, breathless and frantic. Her screaming in the middle of the night. And she had a feeling that Shizuru was hiding something from her, keeping things from her, and she didn't know what or why.

And then there was Nao and her investigation, her discoveries. She had sent Nao to investigate on those readings the computer had picked up, and she didn't like one bit what the redhead had found. It just created more questions, added more to the mystery and confusion.

Natsuki had asked Youko to find out whether the readings that had to do with the brunette's disappearance had occurred in the past. And when Youko searched the archives she had found that they had. In the past fifteen years, those readings had been picked up by Garderobe's computers about eight times at most. Not with the same intensity as of the last couple of times, but they did occur, it was the same exact radio waves. Youko spent enough time deciphering them, she'd recognize those readings anywhere.

Natsuki then sent Nao on a secret mission. A mission to investigate whether there had been any missing persons reports filed at around those times, and if those missing persons ever came back.

When Nao returned a few days later, she told her that there were only two cases of missing persons, and that they had both been found.

It looked like one of them had died of starvation and dehydration since they weren't found on time in the desert.

And the other?

The other person got lucky that there was someone traveling around that area at the time and was picked up and dropped off at the police station, that's the only reason he had survived.

What Nao thought interesting though was that this person also seemed to have memory loss, had no recollection of who he was, like Shizuru. The authorities had helped him find his family.

Nao had left early this morning and was out there looking for that man now. Apparently, one of her contacts had found a lead on the man's whereabouts, so she went to check it out.

But something else interested Natsuki more, something else Nao had found that she thought was far more intriguing.

When Nao had searched the police database to see if they had found anyone in that desert around those times, not just missing persons, but people in general, the police logs showed that they had. They had found four people in total, but they weren't able to identify those dead bodies, there was no information or records when they tried to match the fingerprints.

And the cause of death was a little puzzling. The autopsy revealed that they had died of suffocation, and that their bodies showed extremely high levels of radiation, which was unusual for a desert. And the radiation levels were off the charts. Earl had no place with such high levels of radiation. The numbers were unheard of.

\- Beep - Beep – Beeeeeep -

When the healing process finally finished, Natsuki took a few steps back, moving away from the machine. Emerald eyes watched as the vapor started to slowly disappear, she could see the brunette's form coming to view.

From the positioning, from the shadows, she could tell that Shizuru was still on her knees, could tell that she hadn't moved from the spot she had last seen her.

She could also tell that her hands were on her lap; and now that the vapor was no longer in that area, she could see clearly that her hands were trembling, holding onto her purple, satin, nightgown tightly in that area.

And then, the white vapor was completely gone. And the machine opened on its own; the large, thick glass moving once again.

Her Emeralds eyes didn't blink, her lips sporting a thin line. Shizuru was looking straight at her, her moist, Ruby eyes piercing into her own.

The brunette's body didn't move from her sitting position, didn't make a movement, but her lips sure did. And when they did, three words were spoken so softly, so softly, but loud enough for Natsuki to hear.

"I-I hate you"

The blunette heard Kyoto-ben say.

And she swallowed, the words cutting straight through her heart. She never thought she'd see the day when the brunette would say those words to her.

Never.

"I… I understand" Was the husky reply, "I know I deserve it" And then, she watched as Shizuru calmly left the chamber, her Ruby eyes showing a neutrality, a detachment they hadn't shown before, not towards her. Ruby eyes were always soft to her, friendly to her, ever since they had first met many years ago in this very school.

She watched as Shizuru walked towards her and then past her, heading towards the door behind her.

"Shizuru" Natsuki softly called her name, turning around to face her, her eyes, nose and cheeks becoming pink.

The brunette, in turn, stopped walking but didn't bother turning around. " _Hai_ "

"I had to do this" And after those words were said, the brunette kept walking again, "I'm sorry" and not once did she look back, if she did, she would've seen the tears on Natsuki's cheeks, the tears being produced by her sad, Emerald eyes.

Natsuki then took a few deep breaths, now alone in the room. She tried to compose herself, and using the top part of her right index finger, she wiped the tears away.

These past few weeks, she felt like she was living in a dream.

A really good dream.

Putting aside those couple of arguments about the Nanomachines, things between them had been going so well. And Natsuki herself was slowly getting better, slowly showing affection towards Shizuru in front of their colleagues and friends, or when they went out on dates in the city. She would sometimes even hold her hand or placed a kiss on her cheek before consciousness got the better of her.

She knew it'd be a slow process, that getting better would take time. And she knew that not every day she'd be able to do this, to hold her hand in public, to kiss her cheek, but she was trying. Really trying. She was trying to undo the harm, the years of damage and insecurities that her mother had settled upon her.

And now, with this event, she doesn't know if Shizuru would forgive her. She seemed really upset, and she should be.

Natsuki walked over to the Healing Chamber and inspected the sheets, picking up the bloody thorns that were left behind. There were seven in total.

During the healing process, one by one the splinters and thorns were pushed out of the body. Any foreign object cutting through flesh, cutting though skin, would. Anything except for the Gemstone.

"I just bumped into Shizuru" Youko suddenly said, letting out a soft yawn. She had just entered the room and was still in pajamas herself. She had been told to rush to medical bay, so she did. "There was an unusual calmness about her…" By that, what she meant was that Shizuru seemed unusually detached, that perhaps something had upset her. She'd seen that look on her before, it's been years though. "Is everything okay?"

" _Hai_ , I already took care of it" Was the mutter. " _Gomen_ for waking you up so early, Youko"

"I meant if everything was okay between you two, Natsuki"

But Natsuki didn't respond, not with words, she gave her a sad expression and just simply walked away.

 **A Few Hours Later…**

As Natsuki went about her day, finding it hard to get anything done because she knew that the brunette was upset at her; Shizuru was in the Moon Garden, appearing as calm as ever, trying to meditate.

It was now six thirty in the evening and Shizuru was on her knees on a thick blanket, hands resting on her lap. She was slowly inhaling and then exhaling, inhaling and exhaling, her back straight, shoulders aligned, Ruby eyes gently closed.

She liked meditating in the moon garden. She loved hearing the chirping sound of the birds, it was soothing. And the Jasmines surrounding her produced a sweet, calming scent, helping her relax.

She was trying to clear her mind, find inner peace. Trying to silence her mind. Her nightmares as of late were just that, nightmares. Or at least that's what Shizuru thought.

This past week she had been dreaming about Natsuki, but not in a very good way. She had been dreaming about Natsuki dying, and she was the cause of her death.

… _They're just nightmares..._ Shizuru thought, _…Natsuki is alive. Natsuki is unharmed…_ She had to remind herself every single time those images came to mind.

Yes, Natsuki was alive, alive and well, so she wasn't sure why she was dreaming of these sick, horrible things. They clearly weren't memories… Right?

And she knew that Natsuki was frustrated because of this. Because she wouldn't talk to her, open up to her about her dreams.

She didn't have the strength, the heart to tell her that she's been dreaming of her strangling her, killing her with her bare hands. How could she tell her about these sick, disturbing thoughts that have been plaguing her mind almost every night? How could she?

She couldn't. She just couldn't. She wouldn't even know how to begin that conversation.

And what good would it do to tell her that she also dreams of being tortured in so many different ways? It wasn't going to get them anywhere, anywhere closer to whomever did this to her, anywhere closer to finding out where she had been these past two years.

She wished she could remember something else, dream of something else. Something more helpful, useful. But she couldn't control what she dreamed about, couldn't choose what to dream. They just came on their own.

… _What if I was trying to hurt her that night?..._ Shizuru's eyebrows furrowed and she deeply, shakily inhaled again. " _I-Ie_ , I would never"

Whenever she was having bad thoughts, she visualized something that made her extremely happy, unbelievably happy. That would usually do the trick and take the anxiety away. But today it was especially hard because what made her happy was also the cause she was feeling distressed.

… _I shouldn't have said those words to her…_ Her lips formed a small frown, remembering those three words she had whispered to her this very morning.

She didn't mean it, didn't mean those words, but she couldn't take them back now. And Natsuki shouldn't have done what she did in the first place. She had promised that she'd accept without complaints whatever she decided regarding her treatments. She had promised. And she broke that promise.

… _I'm not so innocent though, I broke my promise as well…_ Shizuru thought, calmly letting out a deep exhale.

That same night at the cabin, she had promised Natsuki that if anything came to her, if she remembered anything about those two years she was away, that she'd tell her. And so far, she wasn't holding up to that promise. She hasn't told her a single thing.

She had also promised Natsuki that she wasn't going to try and figure things out on her own.

And what has she been doing lately?

She has been doing the exact opposite. She has been researching about different types of technology out there.

Nanotechnology.

Biotechnology.

How they worked and how it impacted the body.

She has also been reading about interrogation and torture techniques.

She stopped attending classes the week they returned from their trip, and instead, has been spending time in the library, going through book after book. Books that would help indicate the equipment that was used to torture her.

She would flip through pages, looked intently at every picture. Perhaps if she could classify them, pin-point the equipment and what they looked like, she could find the origin, she could finally be of some help.

But so far, she has come up empty. She hasn't found anything useful yet, nothing in those books looked familiar to her.

She thought that perhaps it was time to visit a bigger library. A public library. Perhaps what she was looking for she wasn't going to find in Garderobe.

… _I'll ask Natsuki-…_ Shizuru pursed her lips, she didn't mean to think of the blunette. She was upset at her and was trying not to think of her. Every time she did so she could only remember what she had done in the morning.

 _…I'll ask Arika-chan to guide me to the library tomorrow…_

And then, she deeply inhaled and exhaled again. In through her nose, out through her mouth; trying to keep her mind at a complete blank for a few moments as she did so. Trying not to think of anything at all.

The silence, the stillness, it was soothing, it calmed the fast beat of her heart.

She could feel that the sun was starting to set, could tell by the darkness in her eyes, because the sunlight was no longer as bothersome as before.

Shizuru decided it was time to head back to her quarters. She enjoyed meditating either in the morning, when the sun wasn't so high, or late afternoon, about an hour before sunset. At those times the energy was better for her. The stillness in her surroundings made her feel better. Feel zen.

She had been so exhausted this morning, so after leaving the infirmary she went straight to her bedroom, locked her door, and took a shower.

She really needed it, her feet and legs were completely dirty and bloody from all the walking she had done during her sleep.

And after her shower, she had gone back to bed and had slept until noon, that's the reason why she was meditating at this time.

Normally, she would have breakfast, lunch, and dinner with Natsuki in the garden. They normally ate all their meals together, but she didn't bother showing up today. She wasn't hungry, she was too upset to eat. And she preferred to be alone, alone to calm down, alone to think.

If she showed up at the garden feeling the way she's feeling, she might say more things she might regret. She thought it best not to go, not to see her, to keep her distance for a little while until she had calmed down.

Shizuru stood from the blanket and then picked it up, about to start folding it,

"Shizuru _Oneesama!_ "

She then turned her head to the side a little, a smiling Arika was approaching her from behind.

Shizuru smiled at the eighteen-year-old, " _Konbanwa_ …" And then, "What brings you to these parts, Arika-chan?" She asked her, knowing very well that students were not supposed to be in this area. It was restricted area, for staff only.

"The _Gakuenchou_ asked me to bring this to your room, I was on my way there now" Arika had a tray in her hands.

" _Ookini_ , Arika-chan" Shizuru softly smiled at the sweet, happy teenager, relieving her from the tray. "I'm not very hungry, but since you've already brought this, would you mind eating it with me? I would hate for it to go to waste"

Arika happily nodded to the brunette. She would never say no to food, not even when she was full.

She followed Shizuru to the nearest bench and sat there with her, then started to slowly dig in.

While they ate, she talked to Shizuru for a little while about what she was learning in class, and also complaining, more like whining about a teacher or two, and about the upcoming exams.

"Shizuru _Oneesama_?" And after a moment of silence, of peace and quiet, Arika softly let out with a small blush, changing the topic. "Can I ask you a personal question? I was going to ask the _Gakuenchou_ , but Nao _senpai_ hasn't been around…"

Shizuru raised a curious brow. She found the girl's sudden blush and nervousness a little intriguing. And if Juliet was involved, it must be about something embarrassing, something that perhaps Natsuki was going to have a difficult time explaining.

" _Ara~_ A personal question? Does it have anything to do about engaging in _this_ and _that_ with a special someone?" She teased, "Because Arika shouldn't if she wants to continue being an Otome"

Arika's blush intensified, she felt so lightheaded and thought she was about to faint. " _T-This_ and _that_?"

Shizuru giggled, " _Fufu~_ I'm only teasing, what is your question?"

Arika let out a breath she didn't know she was holding, "It's about Shizuru _Oneesama_ and the _Gakouenchou_ …" She timidly went straight to the point, "Is it true that you're a couple?"

Shizuru's eyebrows raised in humor by the question, and then softly smiled, "What does Arika-chan think, I wonder?" She asked, tapping her own chin.

Arika thought about it for a while, going back to the first time she officially met the pair at the front steps of Garderobe.

The way they acted around one another, how comfortable they were with one another, all the teasing, she really thought that they were best friends.

But then, sometimes, when they were walking side by side around Garderobe and they didn't notice that she was around, there would be a small touch of hands, an _intentional_ small caress of hands. And the way they smiled and looked at one another sometimes, it wasn't the way two friends looked at one another. There was more to that look, more to that smile.

She didn't think much of it then since it was between two women, but the more she thought about it, the more it reminded her of the way she used to look and smile at Sergay when she had feelings for him.

Arika looked at Shizuru in the eyes, a small blush in place again, and then she softly nodded 'yes' to her. "I think it's true"

And then, she came to another realization. She tilted her head to the side and scratched her cheek when she said it, "Ah, no wonder Mashiro always gives me a weird look when I tell her we should be as close as you two"

Apparently, the young Queen even knew about them but failed to tell Arika. Or perhaps she did tell her and Arika just didn't listen? Only heard what she wanted to hear?

At any case, all Arika wanted was to get along with Mashiro, they disagreed on many things and argued most of the time.

" _Ara~_ _Kawaii,_ ne" Shizuru smilingly tapped the girls head, "You're too sweet" And then, she gracefully stood, it was getting late. "I'm going to return to my quarters, can you take this back to the cafeteria for me?"

" _Hai!_ " Arika said with much enthusiasm, standing as well.

Shizuru then grabbed her blanket and headed for her building, "Have a good evening, Arika-chan" She smilingly told her before disappearing inside.

A couple of hours passed, and she was now in her bedroom, bathed and fully dressed in a comfortable, long, two-piece pajama set, one similar to the ones Natsuki usually wore. She decided to stop wearing short nightgowns for a while, because of her sleepwalking, although that's what she mostly owned. She needed to go shopping for new sleepwear.

She sat there on her long, sofa chair, knees bent closely to her chest, her opened diary next to her. Ruby eyes were intently looking up at the bright moon again. She had remembered something just a few minutes ago, she had a vision, heard the words. She had heard the sentence not too long ago. It had come to her once before:

" _Youko, please take care of Natsuki"_

She had said, but there was more to that vision now, more to the pieces,

" _Tell her that I love her… A-And… That I won't be able to fulfill my promise. T-That I'm sorry"_

She had quickly grabbed her diary and had written down what she saw in her vision, making circle after circle after circle after circle, forming a large, black hole.

"What does it mean?" She thought with furrowed brows as she looked up at the bright moon, "A portal somehow? But a portal to where?"

It was about to be ten thirty in the night soon, and Natsuki usually paid her a visit at around this time after she was also ready for bed.

Most nights, they slept in their respective bedrooms. But sometimes, Natsuki would fall asleep in her bed after a long while of conversing and laughing and making out.

Shizuru really loved hearing her talk, really loved hearing her laugh. She could listen to her all night, watch her smile all night, and she very much enjoyed their make out sessions. They were hot, and most of the time led to engaging in _this_ and _that,_ which was really, really hot.

\- Knock -

\- Knock -

And without fail, right on time, there the blunette was.

"Shizuru…"

She heard her softly say, it sounded like she had no energy to give.

"Can I come in, Shizuru… please?"

But Shizuru didn't respond.

Her rare, Ruby eyes briefly stared at the closed door, she had locked it on purpose. And on the door, she had angled one of her chairs against the knob, making sure she made it difficult for herself to leave this room if she ended up sleepwalking again tonight. Or that at least she would notice if when she awoke the chair had been moved. Nothing stops a sleepwalker, not even a door, Shizuru knew that.

She was starting to think that the cause of her tiredness was because of this, because perhaps she was sleepwalking more than she thought. She wondered what exactly it was that she did when she slept walked. She wondered why she was doing this. Natsuki had said that she didn't have a habit of doing so in the past, why start now?

Meanwhile, on the other side of the door, Natsuki's head rested against Shizuru's door, Emerald eyes closed.

"Shizuru please… Please let me in... Shizuru-"

"Ahem"

And Natsuki quickly stood up straight, it was Miss Maria that had cleared her throat and was walking towards her, _…Oi…_ And she had that usual, unfriendly scowl on her face, yet it seemed a little more sympathetic this time for whatever reason.

"Good evening, Headmistress Kruger"

She heard the old woman say as she walked past her.

Her own bedroom wasn't too far way, she just had to walk the long hallway and then turn left at the corner, her bedroom was a couple of doors down after that.

Most of the bedrooms on this hallway were vacant since it was reserved for the Columns only. The occupants were currently Natsuki, Shizuru, and Nao. The other two Columns worked independently across Earl, they were almost never around and checked in from time to time to help out with the school when they weren't out on mission. And Mai had a room there as well since she had been helping out, but she didn't use it. She went back to Black Valley everyday to feed and keep the demon company.

"Good evening, Miss Maria" Natsuki nervously replied, a hand rubbing her neck.

Miss Maria was no longer her teacher, she was a colleague now, but she still scared the life out of her when she appeared out of nowhere like that.

"If you're worried about her wellbeing"

Natsuki then heard her say, suggest,

"You have keys to every door in this facility, you could use it"

And with that, she silently and very serenely walked away.

Yes, Natsuki did have access to every room in Garderobe. She was the Headmistress and had key cards and passwords to every room.

But if Shizuru had locked her door, if she didn't want to see her, she was going to respect it. She wasn't going to invade her privacy.

"Shizuru" Natsuki tried one more time now that she was alone in the hall again, "Please open the door… Please?"

But still no reply from her.

"I just want to see you, to make sure you're okay"

No reply.

Natsuki sighed, a hand reaching for her robe's pocket, taking out a tiny flower she had made for her out of pink origami paper.

She gave the flower a small kiss, " _Oyasumi_ , Shizuru" then said, slipping the folded flower underneath her door.

She walked back the short distance to her quarters and gently closed the door behind her. Tonight was going to be one of those nights, a long and restless one. She was going to get no sleep tonight.

She walked around her living space, it was more of an apartment than a bedroom. She had a small kitchen, a large living room with a beautiful piano, a dining area, and a larger bathroom.

Since she was responsible for the school administration her quarters were much, much bigger than the other Columns', because she rarely left the school grounds to go out on missions. The time that she did leave Garderobe or Wind Bloom in general when not on a holiday was mainly for diplomatic reasons. The other Columns did most of the dirty work, they all had different duties. Her job was to keep Garderobe going, to keep the students and the Otome Technology safe, and to make sure that the students had the best education possible, the best training possible to become exceptional Otomes. That was her duty as the Second Column.

Natsuki headed for her small bookshelf and picked one of the books she had recently started reading, one she had borrowed from Garderobe's library. Then, she headed for her bedroom and closed the door.

She enjoyed reading, that's one of the things that she and Shizuru had in common. They used to read the same books and exchange opinions and thoughts once they were both done, but they didn't do that anymore. Shizuru's choice of reading as of late had more to do with self-help and spiritual healing, things that Natsuki never had an interest in, she believed it to be a big sham.

But if Shizuru found it helpful somehow, then she was going to give it a try.

She was now reading that book she had found her reading on the jet plane when on their way to Duran. 'Traces of You: Finding Inner Peace, Volume One' the book was called. It was back on the shelves at the library, so Shizuru must've already finished reading it. Shizuru had always been a fast reader and was never the kind of woman to pick up a book and not finish it. Well, unless it was a complete waste of her time.

"This is ridiculous, why do we even carry this?" She softly muttered as she read page after page, her eyebrows furrowing the more she read. She had no idea what kind of weak mind would believe these words. "I need to look at our book directory list, we could certainly do without some of this useless reading"

She placed the book on her night stand and turned off the light, noticing that it was already late. She looked at the white ceiling, stared at it intently for a long while. And when her eyes got tired from not blinking she softly shut her Emerald eyes. She wasn't going to be able to sleep, but at least she could rest her eyes the whole night.

\- Knock -

She heard a soft knock, it was only one knock. And then heard the door open just a little bit.

"Natsuki, are you awake?"

She heard Kyoto-ben whisper.

" _Hai_ " Her left hand reached for her lamp on the nightstand and turned it on. The brunette took this as her cue to come into the room, closing the door behind her.

Shizuru slowly made her way to the bed. Once she got there, she sat on the edge of it next to the sitting blunette.

"I'm still mad at Natsuki" She seriously told her, "I'm only here to thank her for the flower"

That was partly a lie, Shizuru couldn't stand it anymore so she had to see her. She always had a soft spot for her girlfriend and couldn't stay away too long, mad too long. It felt like dejavú to her somehow though, this feeling.

And how Natsuki was pleading, pleading to let her inside, to let her see her, it pulled at her heartstrings. She just couldn't hold it anymore, couldn't ignore the feeling anymore.

Natsuki grabbed her hand and caressed it, sitting closer to her. "I'm really sorry about this morning, Shizuru" She was sincere with her, "You drive me crazy sometimes" And then, added, "But that's not new, it's always been like that. From the moment I met you you've done your best to drive me insane"

Shizuru softly smiled at her. "If you promise me to never do that again, _never, ever_ again, I will forgive you" And then, quickly added, a finger on Natsuki's lips as she was about to speak, "But you have to mean it, and you have to be very convincing" And then, "If you ever do that again I am done with you, do you understand? There will be no second chances" Okay, perhaps she was overdoing it a little, but she needed Natsuki to understand that it could never happen again.

Natsuki nodded in understanding. She grabbed the hand that was touching her lips, regretful, green eyes on the brunette's Ruby ones. "I'll never do that again, Shizuru. I promise… I'm really sorry, please forgive my intrusion..." Adding, "I just, I only want what's best for you, I can't stand seeing you in pain"

Shizuru then softly nodded, letting her know she accepted her apology. And then, she leaned forward and gave her a series of small kisses on the lips, her hand, her thumb caressing her cheek with every brush of lips, never deepening the kiss.

"I love you" Natsuki whispered to her, placing a kiss on her cheek before resting their foreheads together.

"A-And... and I, you" Shizuru replied, caressing the woman's face.

"Natsuki" Then said, "I remembered something, I remembered about the morning I went missing" That's one of the reasons she was here as well, she wanted to tell her about her vision since it was still fresh in her mind.

Natsuki tensed when hearing this, separating a little to be able to look her in the eyes, "You do?"

Shizuru nodded, "Did Youko ever give you my message?"

Natsuki softly nodded once.

"It's so strange, that feeling" Shizuru then said, "When you think you're going to die" And then, added, "It's really true what they say, that either your life flashes before your eyes in those final moments, or that the person you love most comes to mind… I felt sad and yet so happy, sad because I wasn't sure what would happen to you when I'm gone, who would protect you and keep you safe, and happy because I got to see you one more time before everything went dark" There was a sadness in her voice and eyes.

"It just came out of nowhere, the darkness" Shizuru then kept on, "It's so strange…" She was pensive for a little while.

And Natsuki remained silent a little longer, didn't ask any questions because she didn't want Shizuru to stop sharing. She wanted her to keep talking.

"I was standing there in that desert, and it felt as if all time had suddenly stopped" Shizuru continued, "The air felt different somehow, gravity felt different, everything was dark. I couldn't escape it, I was instantly paralyzed"

" _Hai_ " The blunette listened intently.

"And then I felt something pulling me in" Shizuru kept on, she brought her hands up and was looking at them, remembering how it looked like, remembering what she saw, "I could see myself disappearing, I could feel every atom, every cell in my body splitting. I wasn't really… _disappearing_ , per say, it was more as if I was disintegrating… like becoming sand, and a vacuum, the darkness was pulling me in"

"What did it look like, what was pulling you in?" Natsuki then asked.

"From my line of sight? It looked like an endless, black hole" Shizuru told her, "I couldn't see anything past it. Not a sheen of light"

"Like a wormhole or a portal" Natsuki then thought aloud, hand on her chin.

"That's what I thought" Shizuru said, "It could lead to anywhere"

"A different time, past or future?" Natsuki pensively let out,

"A parallel or alternate world?" Shizuru thoughtfully chimed in,

"A different universe? A different planet?" The blunette then added.

Shizuru sighed, "Unfortunately, it is still a mystery to me... I don't remember where it led to, I don't remember what's on the other side. Not yet at least" She finished with a small frown.

Natsuki smiled at her, a hand now on the brunette's neck, "It'll come to you. It's all in there, it's all in your head" And then, "Thank you for sharing this with me, Shizuru..." And reminded her, "You can share anything with me, anything" She pulled her in and loosely embraced her for a long while.

And while she did so, she was going over in her head everything that Shizuru had just voiced, and was thinking how to approach it next.

She'd have to ask Youko about that desert in detail tomorrow, perhaps they could go out there again, run some more extensive tests.

And after a long moment of thinking and silence,

"Shizuru" Natsuki parted from their embrace so that she could see the brunette in the eyes, there was now a small blush on her cheeks, "Let's get better, okay? You and me" Then, softly added, "When we are both better, I want to ask you something. I think it will make you happy" Then corrected: "Make us happy"

Shizuru lightly blushed herself, thinking she had an idea of what that something might be. "I'd really like that, Natsuki" She said with a timid smile, "For both of us to get better, I mean" And then she sealed those words with a long, amorous kiss.

And not soon after their lips met, Shizuru found herself laying on the bed, Natsuki on top of her, in between her legs, kissing her softly and caressing her waist.

And when their lips parted, Shizuru lovingly stared at the woman above for a while, both her hands on the blunette's face, caressing her pink cheeks, "It's very late... I need to go back to my room and go to bed"

"Shizuru..." Natsuki then said, not for one second moving from her position on top of the brunette, totally loving the way she caressed her face in such a sweet way, just like old times. "There's one more thing I wanted to run by you..."

She had been wanting to do this for years now, but was always scared of what other people might think so always backed out. Everything was out in the open now and their friends knew about them, about their relationship. And they seemed to be reacting well about it, not giving them dirty looks or saying hurtful words, unlike her mother.

And she was trying to get better. This would be good for her, for them.

And on the plus side, there would be no more sneaking into Shizuru's bedroom in the night. Or any more embarrassing displays in the hallway like tonight, like what happened with Miss Maria.

And she could also keep a better eye on Shizuru's sleepwalking. Keep her safe. Keep her from injuring herself.

She could only see good things from this, positive things.

"Stay here... Stay with me" Natsuki's cheeks were tinted pink by the proposition, "I'll make room for you, for your things. We could share this space together... W-Would you like to move in here with me?"

Shizuru's heart was pounding loudly against her chest, but she wasn't sure if this was a good feeling or a bad feeling; if this was a good thing, or a bad thing.

Her head tilted back a little, Ruby eyes glancing at the closed door, knowing that the kitchen was not too far away.

There were knives here.

There were sharp, and many dangerous things here.

Things she could hurt Natsuki with in her sleep.

This wasn't a good idea, she couldn't control what she did when she was unconscious, when she was asleep.

All she could think about was what happened two weeks ago in Aries, how she had awoken so suddenly with that letter opener in her hand, how she was standing so close to the sleeping blunette.

If she hadn't awoken, would she have hurt her?

"What do you say, Shizuru?"

"I..." Shizuru swallowed, Ruby eyes still on the door. " _Hai_ , I would love to, Natsuki" Then replied, facing the blunette again, but she didn't sound too excited or convinced.

If she wanted to keep Natsuki safe, perhaps it was time to have a talk with her, to let her know about her disturbing dreams.

 **\- 0 -**

* * *

 **Thanks for Reading!**

 **And thanks for the Reviews/ Follows/ Faves/ Messages/ and Comments**

 **I updated a week sooner than I had promised, I had some time to write :)**

 **I feel like we are slightly moving along now.**

 **Also, one Guest had asked if the Father and Son were aliens. I can't answer that question right now, yes no maybe lol**

 **I'm still researching about the kinks of this SciFi thing. I don't know much about the Genre and I want it to make sense. If it doesn't, I'm so sorry!**

 **Let me know what you guys think about the chapter.**

" **For the Love of ShizNat"**


	12. Chapter 12

**In the Darkness**

 **A Mai Otome ShizNat Story**

 **Chapter 12**

\- Beep – Beep – Beep – Beep – Beep – Beep -

"Natsuki, wake up" Shizuru sleepily spoke, not bothering to open her Ruby eyes.

The alarm was going off; the soft, beeping sound becoming louder and louder, becoming more and more bothersome as the seconds ticked by.

She would reach out for the alarm and turn it off herself if she could, or at least press the snooze button so that it would stop for a few minutes; but her lover had a strong, protective hold on her and she couldn't move. The blunette was spooning her tightly from behind, hugging her as if she were her own personal body pillow. If Natsuki held her any tighter she wouldn't be able to breathe.

But unbeknownst to Shizuru, her lover was doing this for a reason. She was trying to keep her there, did it so that Shizuru wouldn't leave the bed in her sleep.

"Nnn… Five more minutes, Shizuru…" Natsuki softly mumbled, her face buried in mentioned woman's hair, her unique scent filling her lungs. "Please... Just five… more… mi-" And she dozed off again, unable to finish the sentence, finish the word, completely surrendering to sleep.

The blunette was used to the annoying, beeping sound. It had been going off at seven thirty sharp each morning for so many years now. Her ears were immune to the noise, could easily block it, could let it beep and beep and beep until the batteries ran out. She didn't mind it anymore, she wouldn't stir, her internal alarm was the one that usually woke her up each morning.

A small sigh then escaped Shizuru's lips. She leaned to her right, towards the nightstand, and reached for the white clock somehow, her palm clumsily hitting the big, snooze button on top.

Then, she snuggled onto her pillow again and dozed off, her hand joining Natsuki's hand that was resting over her chest area, entwining their fingers together there.

Last night had been a very long night for the couple.

After Shizuru had told Natsuki that yes, that she would move in with her, she had a serious conversation with her regarding her nightmares, the ones related to the blunette.

If she wanted to keep Natsuki safe, she had to tell her, or at least warn her. Natsuki needed to know the frightening thoughts circulating her mind as of late.

Natsuki seemed a little shaken by this revelation at first. But not because of the nightmares, it was because of what Shizuru had said next:

"If my nightmares come true, if I try to harm you in anyway, promise me you won't hesitate... Promise me you will prevent me from hurting you, even if it means ending my life"

"Shizuru..."

"Promise me, Natsuki... Please"

"...Okay, I promise"

And then Natsuki told her, assured her that those nightmares won't come true. Told her not to worry, that they were just nightmares and that eventually they would fade. Told her to think of happy thoughts before going to bed. And that if she couldn't think of anything that would make her happy, that she would help her with this by whispering sweet words to her until she fell asleep. That she would paint blue skies and bright, sunny days for her, and that she would do her best to make those nightmares disappear somehow, to replace them with sweet dreams.

After those words were said, after Shizuru had kissed her senseless for a good ten minutes, thanking her with her playful tongue for her tender, comforting words, Shizuru told her that she was planning to go to the city today to run some errands.

She told her that she was going to cut her hair since her bangs were getting long. That she was also going to do a little shopping for some things she needed, and then spend the rest of the afternoon in the library.

Natsuki then mentioned that she would accompany her, but Shizuru quickly said no. She told her not to take it in the wrong way, but that she just preferred to be alone, that she wanted to go on her own.

So, they ended up staying up a little late. This would be Shizuru's first time outside of Garderobe completely on her own, so Natsuki wrote down directions, emergency contacts, and wrote what public transportation Shizuru should take since she also didn't want Garderobe's driver to drop her off in the city.

Natsuki had been hesitant about this request at first, not liking the idea, especially with Shizuru's amnesia. But the brunette explained to her that she wanted to be more independent, and that perhaps it would be a good idea for her to be out there by herself, that maybe it would help with her memory.

So, Natsuki reluctantly gave in. She couldn't keep Shizuru cooped up in Garderobe anyway. If she wanted to go out, she had every right to. She wasn't going to deny Shizuru her freedom.

So, she told her that she would pick her up at around six so that they could have dinner in the city, have a date. They agreed to meet in front of the public library at that time.

\- Beep – Beep – Beep – Beep – Beep – Beep -

Ten minutes passed, and the alarm started beeping again.

"Natsuki, can you please do something" Shizuru sleepily mumbled. It was too early for her and the sound was driving her insane. She didn't need to wake up yet, not for another hour or so. She didn't attend classes anymore, and it's not like she had a job to go to.

After hearing this, the blunette lazily raised and reached over Shizuru, turning off the electronic device.

She let out a sigh, wishing she could stay in bed a little longer. But as always, duty called.

And after stretching and letting out a soft yawn, she sweetly smiled at the woman sleeping next to her.

Natsuki liked it, liked waking up with her like this. Sure, they had done this many times before, had awoken in the same bed; but today was different, today felt different. As of last night, they were officially living together. As of last night, this was officially _their_ space.

" _Ohayo,_ Shizuru" She gave her lover a kiss on the shoulder, "Dream sweet" and then went ahead and gently crawled out of bed. She headed for the bathroom and took a long, warm shower, brushed her teeth, and then went on about her day.

Natsuki didn't notice it, but that smile of hers had yet to leave her lips.

It was there while she was taking a shower, there as she was putting on her uniform, there as she drank her morning tea from the kitchen counter, admiring the beautiful woman sleeping peacefully on her bed.

Wait, correction, _their_ bed.

It was there as she kissed that same woman's cheek before leaving the room, there while she ate her breakfast alone in her office, and it's even there now as Mai talked to her about who knows what, she wasn't really paying attention. Her mind was elsewhere right now.

"Earl to Natsuki" Mai sighed for the fifth time this morning, placing the papers she was reading aloud on the large desk.

"Natsuki, you're dozing off again…" Another sigh, but an irritated one this time, "How are we going to get anything done when you keep spacing out?" she whined as she curiously observed the woman, "And that smile of yours is creeping me out. Either spill or cut it out" she stood from her seat and leaned forward, almost crawling on the desk, her index finger flicking the quiet woman's forehead with force.

" _Oi!_ "

Then, hearing her husky complaint and groan, coming back to reality from her dream world. "Really, what's wrong with you today?" She asked the blunette as she sat back down.

Natsuki cleared her throat, her cheeks reddening a little by the question.

"Just tell me already" Mai pressed on, "You know you want to~" she finished in a sing-song tone.

And that smile made its appearance yet again. It was a little more timid this time though, "Last night I… I asked Shizuru to move in with me" She answered in a hushed voice.

" _Hontoni?!_ Are you serious!?" Mai gasped and quickly stood again, "No way!" both her hands on the desk, "By that smile of yours I'm guessing she said yes?"

But of course Shizuru would say yes!

And when her friend timidly nodded again, "This is such a brave move from you, Natsuki! I'm so proud of you!" Mai took a seat again, holding back her excitement and not hugging her friend, it was a long way around that large desk.

"The next thing on your list would be to ask for her hand in marriage" And then she came to one realization: "Now that you're living together, make sure you hide the ring. You don't want her to find it and spoil the surprise"

Yes, Mai knew about the gorgeous, Sapphire ring. She had already seen it, Natsuki showed it to her about a week ago.

When Natsuki came back from her trip, she told her about what had happened in her Nation, in Duran. Told her that her mother already knew about her and Shizuru, that she had known for years, actually; and told her all the hurtful things she had said about them and their relationship.

She also told her about her father's kind words and acceptance of her feelings, and about the ring he had given her to propose to the brunette with when she was ready to take that step.

Mai felt sorry for Natsuki, having no idea that her mother would react that way. Saeko seemed so nice and loving the few times she had met her when she visited Wind Bloom. It was such a shame that she had reacted that way, that she didn't approve of their relationship, but at least her father made up for it.

She was glad that Natsu was understanding and supportive of her. Right now, Natsuki needed all the understanding and support she could get, especially since she wanted to move forward, since she wanted to correct her issues.

Mai hoped that Natsuki's mother would someday turn around and accept her for who she was. She knew that Natsuki was still very sad and disappointed, very hurt about her rejection, and she would always be.

She knew that the blunette will never forget that lunch, will never forget that day. Never. That was the day her mother shattered her heart.

" _Hai_ , I have it here in my office. I locked it in the safe" Was Natsuki's reply.

"Do you have any idea of when you think you'll do it? You two have been together so long…"

The blunette turned her chair to the side to stare at the view of the prosperous, lively city. "When we're both better" She slowly crossed one leg over the other, one hand resting on her desk and the other on her lap.

"I can't take that step with her while I'm still like this, Mai, it wouldn't be fair to her. I can't even do something as simple as hold her hand sometimes, even when I really want to…" The blunette stayed silent for a moment, then thought aloud:

"What kind of life would she live? Would she be happy making such a big commitment, being married to me when I'm like this?"

Mai's lips displayed a small frown. And even though she knew Natsuki couldn't see her, she nodded in understanding.

"And Shizuru is not well… I'd like for her to have all her memories back, I want her to be her old self again and-"

And Mai couldn't help and furrow her brows when hearing this, cutting in: "But what if she never gets all her memories back, Natsuki? You'll be waiting for eternity…" Then added, "And even _if_ she gets all her memories back, after all she's been through, do you really think she'll be her old self again?"

Emerald eyes faced her friend again, staring at her intently in the eyes, ears taking in every word she had said.

For better or for worse, over the years, this woman had become her voice of reason.

After a short moment of silence, Mai continued, "If she's not her old self again, would that change your decision to give her the ring, to spend your life with her?" And softly asked her, "Will you stop loving her, Natsuki?"

The _Gakuenchou_ didn't say a word, didn't reply.

No, not yet.

Instead, she lowered her gaze. That happiness she had been feeling, that smile she had been sporting the past two hours slowly disappearing.

In truth, she had thought about it. Had thought about all the possibilities the moment she had found out that Shizuru had amnesia.

She loved Shizuru. She loved the _old_ Shizuru with all her being, with all her soul, with all her heart. And parts of what made that person was still present in the brunette now. Parts of what made Shizuru who she was, was still there. And little by little, those parts became known, those parts came to light every single day.

She was still compassionate, she was still courageous, she was still loving, and humble, and caring. She was still intelligent and considerate, she was still grateful and playful. She was an honorable woman, a beautiful human. Beautiful in every sense of the word. Without a doubt, Shizuru was still all those things.

But let's face it.

Natsuki knew it, she knew that Shizuru wasn't the same, that her personality wasn't the same, at least not completely. She wasn't the same exact person from two years ago.

From the moment the brunette awoke she could tell the difference. It was written in her face, in the way she expressed and carried herself, it was in her features.

That morning when the brunette awoke, the brunette's Ruby eyes had expressed a vulnerability, had expressed a fear that she had never seen in her before.

She had also blushed countless times in a matter of an hour, something that the old Shizuru rarely, _rarely_ did.

She could count with one hand the times she had made the brunette blush in this lifetime. One of them being when she confessed her love for her and kissed her, the brunette had been stunned then, rendered speechless then. And another when they first made love, she had been so timid and gentle then.

There were a few other occasions as well, but those were extremely rare and came out of nowhere. They rarely ever happened.

Another thing Natsuki noticed these past two months was that Shizuru couldn't control her temper, couldn't mask her emotions as well as before. The wall she had built around her, it was completely shattered, completely gone. If she was upset, it clearly showed on her face. If she was happy or sad or excited, it clearly showed on her face. But not just her face, it also showed on her stance and walk.

The old Shizuru never let anything show, never let anything penetrate or get through, not after she had become a Column. She represented calmness, pleasantness, and playfulness all around, as if nothing ever bothered her.

And that tap on her forehead, the one telling her not to worry, it was something intimate, something personal. Shizuru always did this behind closed doors, always. But she was doing it so openly, so freely now, doing it around other people. The precious intimacy of it now gone.

The old Shizuru also knew she was uncomfortable with certain things so she refrained from doing them while other people were around, _arguments_ being one of them. But the Shizuru from now knew it and it didn't stop her from doing so. She'd argue with her anytime, anywhere and everywhere. It didn't matter who was listening or watching. It didn't matter if it was totally embarrassing.

There was a sort of carelessness about her, a lightness and openness about her. And in a way, it reminded her of when Shizuru was a teen, of when she was a Pearl. She was like this back then. She was this free, this exposed, the burden of her responsibilities and feelings didn't exist then.

Natsuki knew that perhaps Shizuru would never fully be that person from two years ago, that person prior to disappearing and having amnesia, but that didn't make her love her any less.

Memories or not, old habits or not, wall in place or not, she loved Shizuru all the same. Her love for the brunette would never change, not as long as Shizuru's essence was still in there.

As long as she was still that compassionate woman, that loving and caring woman, that kind and courageous woman, that passionate and stubborn and humorous woman, she would never stop loving her.

Never.

That was the Pearl, no, _the woman_ whom she fell in love with. And Shizuru was still all those things.

She still was.

Shizuru was still the same woman whom she had fallen in love with all those years ago.

"Natsuki?" Mai softly let out, the blunette had been pensive for so long.

And then, " _Ie_ " came the husky, honest response, "It won't change my decision… I will not stop loving her"

And Mai smiled warmly at her, "When the time is right, Natsuki, when you think you're better" she advised her, "Just do it, just ask her, live a full and happy life" and then, "I want you to be happy, both of you deserve it. You have loved each other for so long..." and finally adding, "You know you won't be happy with anyone else. And I know Shizuru-san well enough to say the same for her… When she looks at you, I can see it, I can see that she loves you with the same intensity as before. Her love and adoration for you, her commitment to you hasn't changed"

The blunette softly smiled, "I-I know…" a small blush making its way to her cheeks yet again.

She could see it as well, could feel the brunette's love for her. It hasn't changed, not even a little bit.

"Let's keep working hard on making you better, ne?" Mai leaned forward with both elbows on the desk, her chin resting on her entwined fingers. "Shizuru-san has enough on her plate already so don't put too much pressure on her. She's trying her best to remember, to put the pieces together" And adding, "I think the meditating helps, she seems calmer now than she was a month ago" By that, Mai meant that the brunette seemed less snappy and restless, and giving less attitude too.

But Mai couldn't blame Shizuru for being like this. If she were in her position, if she couldn't remember her past, her whole life, she would be snappy and restless and aggravated too.

"Hmm" Natsuki hummed in response.

"Have you heard from Nao?" Mai then asked as she leaned back on the chair.

Yes, she knew about the secret mission. Only Natsuki, Nao, Youko and herself knew.

The blunette sighed, a hand slowly rubbing her forehead, " _Hai_ , she called before you came in…" And it didn't sound like she had very good news to tell, "She's on her way back to Wind Bloom now, she should be here early afternoon" And about five seconds later, she placed her Emerald eyes on the now opening door. The newcomer didn't even bother to knock.

"Shizuru" Natsuki softly smiled, raising from her seat and walking towards the approaching brunette, meeting her in the middle of the room.

"Good morning, Shizuru-san!" Mai cheerfully greeted from her chair after she had twirled around to face them.

" _Ohayo_ , Mai-san. It's lovely to see you" Shizuru smilingly replied, "Am I interrupting?"

"No, no, not at all" Mai quickly waived it off.

" _Etto_ …" And Natsuki then faced her friend, Emerald eyes silently asking her to leave, to give them privacy.

But Mai just sat there, smirking back at her, she wasn't going anywhere. Instead,

"I love that dress on you, Shizuru-san. That shade of yellow looks very nice on you, brings out your eyes" Mai complemented, grin still in place, "Doesn't she look cute today, Natsuki?"

And Natsuki's right eye involuntarily twitched, staring at Mai. She didn't have a problem with telling Shizuru that she looked beautiful. She always tells her that she looks beautiful. Every day she tells her that she looks beautiful. Okay, maybe not when people were around, which was probably the reason Mai was doing this, but still, she told her. Every-single-day she told her.

"Don't look at me, look at her and tell her what you think" Mai teased. "Go on, say the words" And then sing-sang, "And say them loud enough for me to hear, ne?"

The blunette had no choice but to give in. She deeply sighed and then cleared her throat, her cheeks displaying a soft pink. She was so going to murder Mai for this. " _Hai_ , you look very beautiful today, Shizuru"

Yes, Mai and Natsuki were right, Shizuru looked really cute today.

She was wearing a long, sleeveless, honey-yellow dress. It was flowy but tight in the right places, tight in her chest area and waist, showing off her dangerous curves. It was long, but not too long. It slightly covered her knees, showing her silky, smooth legs. She also had her hair up in a high ponytail, her bangs clipped to the side for now because they were a little long, hence the reason she was going to the hair salon. And she was also wearing white, fancy sandals but with no extra height, no heel, today she was going to do a lot of walking and wanted to be comfortable.

Oh, and let's not forget that her crescent moon necklace was adorning her delicate neck, the pendant resting just below her collarbone. She never took the piece of jewelry off.

" _Fufu_ , _Oo-ki-ni,_ Na-tsu-ki" Kyoto-ben said with a hint of mirth, thanking the heavens for Tokiha, Mai.

She knew that Mai was one of the reasons Natsuki was doing so well as of late. She was a really good influence on the blunette, was really helping her overcome her issues.

"Natsuki knows what I think of her uniform already, but if she wants I could tell her again" Shizuru happily chimed in.

"Oh, please-do-tell" Mai then imposed, ready to have some fun.

" _E-Etto~_ " And Natsuki stiffened, " _Ie_ , that's not necessary" a finger going for her tie and loosening it a little. She was having palpitations right now and was finding that the room had become extremely hot and extremely small so suddenly.

"A-Are, um, are you leaving already, Shizuru?" She quickly changed the subject before things got embarrassing.

Whenever Shizuru complimented her on an outfit, any outfit, even her boring pajamas, she never just said that she looked pretty or nice.

No, no, no.

Shizuru got very, _very_ descriptive, it almost sounded like foreplay, like dirty talk. And the way she sugarcoated the words, and on top of that, that exotic accent of hers, it made things sound ten times more inappropriate than they really were. It was really embarrassing outside of the bedroom.

" _Hai_ , I'm here to tell you that I'm heading out" Shizuru's right hand reached out for the blunette's left.

And Natsuki tensed for about three seconds, but then relaxed, reciprocating with the hand-holding by entwining their fingers together. "You've got everything, right? Sweater, money, phone numbers, directions, your _bento_?" Yes, even a _bento_.

Natsuki had asked the cooks this morning to prepare something easy for her to eat, like a salad or a veggie sandwich. She wanted to make sure that Shizuru ate.

Lately, she had been a little fussy with her food and wasn't eating anything containing fish, poultry or meat. The new transfer student was a vegan, and she had told her about the cruel things her Nation did to the animals they consumed. It made Shizuru extremely queasy, she hasn't been able to look at red meat for a few days now.

And let's add to that, that, when Shizuru was so immersed in something, like reading in the library, she forgot to eat. She had been late to their lunches a few times this week because she had lost track of time, so she herself had to go to the library and get her when she noticed half an hour had passed and she wasn't showing up.

It made her wonder what had captured Shizuru's interest this much, but she didn't want to pry. Whatever it was, she was sure Shizuru would tell her on her own.

" _Hai_ , I've got everything" Shizuru said, lightly tapping on the side of her large bag.

"Are you sure you don't want me to come with you? I can take the rest of the day off-"

"What?! No, you can't" Mai quickly interrupted from her sitting position, "You've been daydreaming all morning and we haven't gone through all the details for the annual student retreat… I'd like to go home at a decent time today to feed the demon, she gets restless when she doesn't eat supper on time"

" _Ara~_ Daydreaming, Natsuki?" Kyoto-ben spoke while raising a curious brow.

"A-Ah" And Natsuki nervously laughed, a hand on the back of her head. "Don't listen to her, she doesn't know what she's saying" And then she shot Mai a look, but like always it had no effect on the busty woman.

"If you need me" Natsuki then followed the walking brunette to the door, "or get lost, or want me to pick you up earlier, call me, okay? I'll be there right away"

From Mai's perspective, it seemed like Natsuki was having separation anxiety. It seemed like she didn't want to let her go.

Was Natsuki afraid that she wasn't going to come back? Was she still traumatized by the events of two years ago?

" _Hai,_ I will… And remember to change before leaving, we have a date tonight" The answer came with a gentle smile.

Tonight, after having dinner, they were going to visit the Planetarium. There was a new exhibit and documentary about Earl History that Shizuru was interested in watching.

"And do not worry, ne?" She refrained from lightly tapping in between the woman's furrowed brows, it just didn't feel appropriate somehow, "I'm not five years old, I know how to take care of myself" And then, "I'll see you at six?"

"Okay…" Natsuki muttered, never letting go of Shizuru's hand.

"Natsuki" Shizuru had to whisper, "I can't leave without my hand"

But Natsuki still didn't let go. "Just give me a second" She murmured, wanting to give her a goodbye kiss, but she could feel Mai's nosy, purple eyes on them.

Emerald eyes then glanced over at Mai, eyes imploring her to at least look away if she wasn't going to leave the room. But as always, Mai didn't falter, she was still watching them like a hawk and had that playful, knowing smile on her face.

Natsuki couldn't help and sigh, this girl wasn't going to give her a break. She was starting to regret ever telling her about her problems. She was pressing too hard, pushing too hard.

"I-I'll, um" Natsuki couldn't help and swallow the lump that had formed in her throat, "I'll see you at six" and confirmed the brunette's previous words. "In front of the library, don't forget" Then quickly leaned forward and gave the brunette a short peck on the cheek, but what she really wanted to do was kiss her lips.

"Really, Natsuki? You call that a goodbye kiss? I'm sure you can do better than that"

Natsuki faced the woman yet again, slightly aggravated by her. She really wanted to strangle her right now. The only reason she couldn't kiss Shizuru's lips was because of her, because she was watching them.

"Natsuki?"

She then heard Kyoto-ben softly say her name,

"Look at me…"

And she did, her aggravation instantly disappearing when their eyes met,

" _Daijoubu,_ ne?"

She heard her say,

"I've really got to get going. I'll see you a little later"

She felt Shizuru's thumb lovingly caressing her knuckles. She saw as those soft lips of hers started smiling at her.

And that smile of hers entranced her, put a spell on her. Those lips of hers were silently calling her, were pulling her in.

She knew they weren't alone, she knew that Mai was watching, and for once she didn't mind.

"Have a good day, Mai-san"

She heard Shizuru cheerfully voice.

And before Shizuru could walk away and let go of her hand, "Shizuru, wait" she took a step closer to her.

Her free hand acted on its own, it reached upwards and rested on the brunette's exposed, warm neck. And then, she leaned forward, feeling as if her heart was about to run out of her chest. She tip toed a little to meet her height, slowly closed her Emerald eyes before their noses had touched, and their mouths opened just a little to meet in a slow, tender kiss. A slow, tender brush of lips.

Shizuru had said that it was okay, that she didn't have to do this, but Natsuki needed to. She wanted to.

And about ten seconds later when their lips parted,

"I love you" Natsuki whispered against her lips. Only Shizuru could hear this, feel this.

"I-I know" And Shizuru whispered back, her lips slightly trembling and cheeks turning pink. She didn't expect that Natsuki would kiss her on the lips, this had caught her by surprise.

"Aww, that was so sweet. Now THAT's what I call a goodbye kiss!" Mai joyfully said from far away.

And both women stared at her direction when she said this. But one of them blushingly pouted and couldn't look her in the eyes, and the other playfully winked, her form of saying thanks.

 **Hours Later…**

 **City of Wind Bloom**

 **Public Library**

Shizuru walked around the old library, browsing the massive shelves near the pick-up area.

Her fingertips were touching the edges of the worn out, colorful books, reading the titles as she walked along. She was waiting for her name to be called, the librarian would call her name when she had found the books she was going to checkout.

The first thing Shizuru did when she arrived the city was go straight to the hair salon, where a nice, handsome, young man washed, trimmed, and blow dried her thick, wavy, chestnut hair.

After she was done at the hair salon, she visited a few stores and bought a few pairs of long pajama sets. That was all she really needed, she didn't need or want anything else.

She also wanted to get Natsuki a 'thank you for being such an understanding girlfriend' present, so she stopped by the same store where the blunette had gotten the crescent moon necklace for her, and bought a cute necklace with a small, star pendant to gift her. Natsuki didn't really wear jewelry, and it didn't seem like she owned many either, but it'd be something nice for her to wear once in a while when she was out of uniform. She was sure Natsuki would like it.

And now, it was a little past five and she was in the library waiting for her books to arrive.

Shizuru was truly amazed, impressed. This library was extremely large, apparently one of the largest and oldest in all of Earl. The building itself looked like an old church, with many large columns and pillars. It was a beautiful building, a historic building.

And this library had so many books, so many floors with different sections and selections. A scholar like her, who was always interested in learning and acquiring more and more knowledge, would come here everyday to read if given the chance. She would read everything she could get her hands on, inspect every corner of this place. Everything seemed so interesting.

It had taken her a very long time to decide which books to checkout because of their large inventory. When she checked the directory, when she typed the word 'Technology' in the computer, a long, never ending list of titles appeared. Titles that had nothing to do with what she was looking for.

She slowly scrolled down the list, clicking a few titles here and there, and then read the summaries for each. She did this countless times, did this for hours. And then decided to narrow her search since it was taking way too long.

She cleared the search and started over again, typed the words 'Technology' along with 'History' next.

When she browsed the titles, a few immediately stood out: Technology Advancement and History, Technologies Throughout History and, Dark Tech: Successes and Failures of Technology throughout Time.

When she showed her list to the librarian, the woman had given her a warry look and had asked her if she had special clearance to read these books. Apparently, not everyone could have access to them. And Shizuru, not remembering whether she did or not, was honest with the old woman and told her that she wasn't sure.

Luckily for Shizuru, Wind Bloom's library had Face Recognition technology in place, so all Shizuru had to do to checkout these books was an eye scan, and her level of clearance showed up instantaneously on the librarian's screen. When the information came up and the woman noticed that she was a Column, that she was Viola, Shizuru, The Bewitching Smile Amethyst, she immediately apologized and told her she would get the books for her right away, to not leave the area and to wait for her name to be called.

So, Shizuru waited. She walked around the room with her shopping bag in hand, checking out different titles in the Fiction and Romance section. And then, she decided to sit on the bench near the windows since the woman was taking too long to return.

As Ruby eyes stared out the window, the warm sunlight bathing her face, making her Ruby eyes turn a lighter, brighter shade of red, she couldn't help and smile, thinking of the kiss she had shared with Natsuki prior leaving Garderobe.

That kiss, it had totally caught her by surprise, had caught her completely off guard. It had her heart thumping so, so fast. It was a nice feeling, an accelerating feeling, it reminded her of their first kiss. Not the one she had stolen from her when Natsuki was a Coral, but their actual, mutual, first kiss.

" _Ara~_ " And Shizuru smiled wider, she was unable to contain it. Her hand raised, fingers gently touching her lips. _…Our first kiss…_ She remembered, she remembered their first kiss!

"Viola, Shizuru-san"

Shizuru faced the counter, hearing her name being called. " _Hai_ " And she stood, grabbing her belongings and joining the woman on the counter.

"I'm sorry for the long wait, these are delicate and unique materials, so they are kept locked away in storage" The old woman explained and apologized for the delay. "Please wait a few more minutes and I'll process them for you"

" _Hai_ , please take your time" The brunette replied with a warm smile, "I'm not in a rush" And she grabbed one of the books as she waited, opening it and slowly flipping through pages.

As Ruby eyes stared intently at the pages, she started to feel a little restless, a little uneasy. She couldn't recognize any of the pictures she was looking at, but the equipment felt familiar somehow. As if she had seen it before.

" _Father, the particles are not bonding with the subject…"_

Shizuru looked up from the book and looked to the side. She had just heard a voice, a soft voice. So soft it could lull her to sleep.

She had heard that voice before, but when?

Where?

Ruby eyes then slowly scanned her surroundings, scanned the room. There were a few people in this section, but they were alone and quietly reading, it didn't seem like anyone had spoken.

"Is everything alright, miss?"

She heard the woman say, so she faced her direction again. " _Ha… Hai_ , I just…" She smiled at her, not wanting to worry her, "I thought I had heard something" And then the woman went about her business and started typing again.

" _Perhaps there is something we are overlooking"_

And there it was again, that soft, male voice.

" _she is female, and about the same age as Deadly Beautiful, so it should've worked"_

"What?" Shizuru whispered while looking at her surroundings again, a frown on her features. "Did you hear that?" She calmly asked the old woman, but she just gave her a curious stare and shook her head no.

Shizuru's heart started to raise, her hands were lightly shaking. What was happening to her? Was she hearing things?

"Okay, miss, you are all set"

Shizuru heard the woman say,

"They're due back in thirty days, but if you need more time with them, come in and ask for an extension before the time is up. You'll need to pass clearance again"

" _Hai_ , I understand, _ookini_ " Shizuru tried to calm herself, to control her shaky hands. She grabbed the books and quickly inserted them one by one in her large bag, one of them accidentally falling on the ground.

"Are you sure you're okay, miss?"

" _H-Hai_ " But Shizuru really wasn't. She quickly bent to pick up the fallen book and shoved it in her bag.

"I could call someone for you-"

"I-I'm fine" Shizuru interrupted, " _Ookini_ , have a good day" And she quickly headed for the entrance.

She felt like she was suffocating, like she couldn't breathe, she needed to get out of this place.

" _I'll review the footage again tonight, father, I must've missed something"_

Once she was out, she quickly sat on the front steps of the library, her bags next to her.

"B-Breathe, Shizuru…" Her shaky hands went for her face, covering her teary eyes. "B-Breathe…" She told herself, "B-Breathe…" and as the seconds went by, the soft voice in her head started to become inaudible, to disappear.

"Breathe…" And she kept doing this, kept deeply inhaling and exhaling until she could no longer hear it. "Breathe" And once the voice was completely gone, she opened her teary, Ruby eyes, letting out a shaky breath in the process.

"What is happening to me?" She couldn't help and ask now that she was a little calm. "Am I going insane?"

 **\- 0 -**

* * *

 **Thanks for Reading!**

 **And thanks for the Reviews/Comments**

 **This chapter was more of a setup for what's to come in the next chapter(s)**

 **We're almost getting towards the end of this story, I didn't expect it to be this long.**

 **Let me know what you guys think, it really helps with the brainstorming process. Most of you leave very insightful feedback, and I do try and please everyone if I can :)**

 **Until next time!**

 **"For the Love of ShizNat"**


	13. Chapter 13

**In the Darkness**

 **A Mai Otome ShizNat Story**

 **Chapter 13**

"What could I have possibly overlooked?" The son thought aloud as he carefully reviewed the footage from two nights ago, the footage from when the brunette was in the school building.

He was alone in his bedroom and had been looking at the recording for three hours straight now, looking at it nonstop. His bright, blue eyes noticing, taking in every single detail on the small screen.

The women in the posters, the ones in their Robes, they were of different ages, both young and old. So, he ruled that possibility out. It had nothing to do with age.

They also seem to be of different races and backgrounds, so those possibilities were out as well.

They had administered the particles into one of their female guards just a few hours ago, but nothing happened, nothing changed. They were overlooking something, something important.

But what?

"What is it about her that allows her to bond with the particles so well?"

They knew it had nothing to do with her blood. When they had tested her blood, when they broke it down and analyzed it, there was nothing that stood out. There were no special genetic markers, there was nothing out of the ordinary.

"Perhaps our bodies are too polluted with radiation and nothing can be done…"

He stopped looking at the footage for he felt the room suddenly tremor, felt his surroundings suddenly shake. Saw a little bit of dust, or perhaps sand, fall from the ceiling. It felt like a small earthquake, but he knew it wasn't.

He stopped playing the recording and turned off the tablet, not wanting to waste energy.

For the past two decades, the usage of electricity in this facility had been minimized. That was the reason there was barely any lighting in the rooms and halls, why it was so dark most of the time. That was also the reason it was always extremely cold; because they didn't turn on the heaters, not anymore. And when they did it was only for an hour at most. Usually, they protected themselves with layer upon layer of clothing. That's what kept them warm.

The little energy they had left was being strictly reserved for the portal, to be able to use it. Using it required an immense amount of energy, energy that they could no longer generate.

The young man stood from his seat. He left his small desk and walked over to his closet to grab a pair of goggles, a jacket, an oxygen mask, and a camera. He was going to head to the surface for a few minutes to check out what the cause of the tremor was, to check out how big the piece of the moon that had crashed into the planet was.

The last time he had felt this sort of tremor was about six months ago, and the one prior to that was a little over a year ago. The time in between was narrowing more and more, the crashes were becoming more and more frequent as time passed. It was only a matter of time for the bigger pieces of the shattered moon to reach the planets' atmosphere.

The pieces were too big, it would completely destroy the planet once it hit the ground.

He was hoping that by the time that happened, they had already discovered the mystery of the curious particles they had found in the brunette's blood. So that whatever remained of his people, of his kind, could safely cross over to the new planet, to Earl, where they rightfully belonged.

They needed the healing power of the particles in order to survive. In the past, they had tried sending people to the other side, but within an hours' time or less, they died. Their bodies were too weak, too sick due to centuries of radiation. Radiation that was caused by their greedy ancestors who had carelessly engaged over and over again in nuclear war, not caring of the consequences it would cause since it was predicted that the planet was doomed anyway, that they wouldn't survive.

Their galaxy, the Milky Way, was in a collision course with the nearest galaxy, Andromeda. For thousands of years space experts had said that this collision, that this merge wouldn't affect their living, that it wouldn't affect their planet. That this collision wouldn't affect their Solar System at all.

But as the time of the collision drew nearer, as they gathered more data and started to notice changes in the distant stars and planets, the race for finding another suitable planet to live on began.

For centuries the space program sent out astronauts and scientists, sent out spaceships to the nearest, safest Galaxy. Their mission, their main objective, was to find a planet they could inhabit, one with similar features to their planet, _Earth_. When they did find one, the one that was now called Earl, a second Earth, they prepared for migration right away.

Most of the people in the planet did evacuate. But those who were against the migration, along with non-believers, stayed behind.

And what followed was complete and total chaos.

War between believers and non-believers erupted. War between countries began. Misconduct, disorder, and violence had spread everywhere, had spread to every corner of the planet. No one bothered to take care of the planet, no one bothered to see what they were doing to it, blinded by their greed and their lust for power.

And when the merger between galaxies finally occurred about a hundred years after the migration, when they realized that they had survived it, it was already too late. The damage they had caused to the beautiful, blue planet was irreversible, was beyond repair.

The space experts were right about most predictions they had made. Most of their predictions about the merger of the galaxies had come true: The air had become almost un-breathable, although the radiation from warfare had a big impact on that as well. The lakes and rivers and oceans, had immediately frozen. All vegetation had withered, most animals had died.

The planet had been pushed further from the sun, becoming much colder. And instead of one moon, two others had joined, making the days a lot shorter and also messing up with the planet's rotation.

During the merger, one of the two moons ended up crashing into their original, friendly moon, shattering it to pieces. And now those shattered pieces were falling one by one on what was left of Earth.

Yes, the experts were right. The planet wouldn't survive the merger, not under these new conditions. Not when it was so far away from the sun. Humans, the cycle of life, every living organism in general existed because Earth had been positioned at the right spot all this time. And now, it no longer was.

And nothing could be done about this, everyone in the planet knew it. If they wanted to survive, they had to leave Earth somehow. But they didn't have enough energy to power up the remaining ship, didn't have the resources to get out.

And even with the resources, out there, outer space, was unstable and infinite. If they got out, they had no idea where to go and what they would find. They didn't have the resources nor the technology to start over elsewhere. And they weren't astronauts, they weren't space experts, they were people. Regular people. Most of them, at least.

Development, technology, any kind of positive advancement had stopped the moment most inhabitants had left Earth. It was not until recently that they had started working on an alternative to leaving the planet, on getting the portal to work. It was an experiment, a project that the space program had started working on one decade or so before the migration process, but couldn't finish it, couldn't figure out the missing links before leaving the planet.

And after much dedication, much time and effort, his father had finally made the machine work.

But there was a problem, they couldn't control where it opened, where it led to. It led them to that desert.

The desert wasn't their main concern, though. Once they got to the other side, they couldn't breathe, not for long anyway. The high levels of radiation in their bodies, plus two centuries of living underground in a manufactured environment, generation after generation, had changed the way that their bodies processed oxygen, along with other basic elements in the periodic table.

They wouldn't be able to survive in Earl, not without the help of the curious particles. Those particles would heal them, correct their genes. Those particles would be their salvation.

His father, however, not only being a scientist but also having military upbringing, had other plans in mind. He was too focused on power, too focused on finding _the source_ , finding whatever powered up the Gem so that they could power up the weapons of mass destruction that they had. Too focused on finding the source so that he could make powerful warriors like the beautiful brunette.

His father just didn't want to survive, no, he wanted more. His father wanted to rule the new world. His father had different priorities, a different vision in mind. A vision that he didn't share, at least not anymore, not since he had seen how beautiful and prosperous Earl was.

The young man left his room, quickly closing the door behind him not to let the little heat that was there escape. Then, he walked the empty halls, flashlight in hand.

"Your head isn't shiny today, Ichiro-kun. Does this mean you're not haunting your _girlfriend_ in her sleep tonight?"

He heard one of the older guards mock him as he walked by. Somehow, word had gotten around that he had a 'thing' for the gorgeous, Crimson eyed brunette.

How this spread or became known, he wasn't sure. Someone must've been eavesdropping, perhaps even snooping around his bedroom while he wasn't around. But he was glad that at least they didn't make such comments around his father. His father didn't like that he had a 'thing' for the beautiful brunette. He said that it made the connection, made going _in the dark_ very unstable. That the technology was very old and very _unpredictable._ That it had been classified as a failure, and that the neon-yellow serum had many _unexplored effects_. His father said that it was best to keep feelings out of it, at least for now. He could do whatever he wanted with his feelings once they were successful, once they were on the other side of that portal with their weapons of mass destruction.

"What do you do when you take over, anyway? Do you make her feel good? Do you touch her?"

Even if he wanted to touch her, he couldn't. His father was always watching, always. And it's not like he, or Deadly Beautiful could feel anything while _in the dark_ anyway. He could only move, hear and see. He couldn't talk, couldn't feel.

"You're a virgin, right, Ichiro-kun? Do you even know how to touch her?"

Ichiro, as always, just ignored him and kept walking away.

This facility was the only inhabited facility, the only inhabited place left on Earth. Most humans had died either because of starvation, coldness, radiation, or by the hands of war.

There weren't many of his people left, either, about one hundred and fifty, maybe less. He was twenty-eight years old, one of the youngest in the group. And the one who followed him was barely four years old.

The women in their small colony, they couldn't procreate, they had problems becoming pregnant or died during childbirth. The little girl that was born about four years ago had been the first birth they had had in over two decades. She was a miracle and was named as such by her parents. But unfortunately, her mother died hours after giving birth.

When the young man reached the door that would lead him to the surface, he wore his jacket, goggles, and oxygen mask. Then, he proceeded to open the Airlock door and closed it behind him, going up the same narrow staircase the brunette had climbed a little over two years ago.

Once he reached the top, he opened the second Airlock and climbed the short set of steps after that. And once he was outside, he took his camera and pointed it upwards, towards the moon. He took a few snaps of it to see how it differed from last time the earth trembled.

He sighed as his bright, blue eyes looked at it, not through lenses but his own, two eyes.

"Deadly Beautiful…" He said aloud, referring to the brunette. Even though he knew her name he couldn't bring himself to say it. Only because he didn't hear it from her, he heard it from that Emerald eyed blunette. And he really hated that blunette. He wished she were dead. "I wonder what your thought was when you saw this"

He knew she must've seen this. She must have. He knew that she had made it all the way to the top, and when she saw there was no escaping this, when she had seen her surroundings, she had probably decided to head back down, knowing that out there, she would die.

"We're running out of time" One of the bigger chunks seemed to have moved closer to Earth. It was very noticeable that they were running out of time.

 **Meanwhile, Back on Planet Earl**

 **Streets of Wind Bloom**

Natsuki and Shizuru were side by side, walking the quiet streets of Wind Bloom. It was a warm night, but the light, cool breeze helped alleviate this, brought some relief to their warm skin.

It was a quarter past nine. They had just left the Planetarium and were walking towards the nearest café. They were going to wait for Garderobe's driver there since they had left the place a little earlier than anticipated to buy some ice cream.

"Did Natsuki enjoy the exhibit?" Shizuru asked the quiet blunette, trying to fill the silence, to make conversation with her.

She noticed that Natsuki had been rather quiet and pensive, rather serious most of the night. She was physically there with her, but her mind seemed elsewhere most of the time. When she had asked her if anything was wrong, she had replied no; and although she didn't believe her, she left it at that.

She could tell something was off, that something was bothering her. Something was occupying the blunette's thoughts.

But what?

" _Hai_ , I did. It was very enlightening" Came the honest, short answer.

"I'm glad that our ancestors decided not to bring any of that harmful technology to Earl when they migrated" Shizuru thoughtfully added, "Science is wonderful, but when technology is developed without reason, without a clear purpose or without heart, it is very unstable and harmful. If used the wrong way, it could be devastating… chaotic"

And Natsuki nodded, agreeing one hundred percent with this. "The knowledge did make its way here through articles and books though. It is our job as Otomes, _as Columns_ , to contain that old technology and keep it safe. To prevent war and not to repeat our ancestor's mistakes"

Yes, most of the knowledge is locked up in Garderobe's underground library, where the rests of the Founder, along with many other previous Columns who had fallen in battle, peacefully lay.

"We should prepare a field trip for the Corals sometime" Kyoto-ben then let out, "It'd be nice for them to see this, since it is a part of their curriculum to learn about Earl's and Earth's history" Then adding, "And it is a good reminder of where we came from, of our ancestry, it would be rather educational for them, don't you think?"

"Hmm" Natsuki hummed in agreement, "I'll talk to Miss Maria, she normally plans the student's off-site activities. I'm sure she will not have any objections" and then she remained silent once again, staring straight ahead at the empty, lonely street.

After another long moment of silence,

"Did Natsuki like her gift?" Shizuru changed the topic to something lighter, warmly smiling at the blunette.

And Natsuki's cheeks turned a little pink, softening up, emotion finally reaching her face. Her right hand going up to her neck, touching the beautiful, white gold necklace Shizuru had surprised her with while they were having dinner.

" _Hai_ , it's very lovely…" The blunette timidly smiled and reached out for her girlfriend's warm hand, entwining their fingers together. " _Arigato_ , Shizuru. You really didn't have to do this"

" _Ara~_ " Shizuru then pulled the blunette closer as they walked, showing her beautiful smile, "There's my Natsuki" her nose playfully caressing her girlfriend's blushing cheek and then giving her a quick kiss there before adding a little distance again, not wanting to make her feel uncomfortable.

"W-What-, what do you mean?" Natsuki's face reddened even more by the sudden closeness and attention.

"Natsuki's thoughts have been elsewhere tonight, it's the first smile I've seen on those sweet lips of hers in over two hours…"

And Natsuki let out a nervous laugh, not realizing she was so easy to read. "I-Is that so?" When Shizuru smilingly nodded, "Ah, _gomen_ " The blunette then cautiously added: "I was thinking of a few things I still need to take care of when we get back to Garderobe. I still have paperwork to review" That was a lie, yet it had some truth since she did need to review some files, they just didn't have anything to do with the school.

All through the evening, she couldn't help and think of what Nao had told her when she had returned from her mission.

The blunette didn't have the chance to speak with the young Column much, more so since Nao had returned later than expected, and she herself needed to meet Shizuru in the city. But what little Nao was able to tell her on their short meeting was troubling.

When Nao returned to Garderobe, the first thing she told her was that, yes, that she had found the man, but that he was dead. She then told her a little bit of the man's background, of why he was in that desert to begin with, and also gave her a short synopsis of how he spent his time before dying.

Basically, the man was a simple commoner, a simple merchant from a neighboring kingdom who was traveling to Wind Bloom for work, to sell his homemade goods. From what the neighbors were able to tell Nao, he used that dangerous route often, went through that treacherous desert often since it was the shortest, fastest way to Wind Bloom's capital.

On his last trip, the man just didn't return. He had disappeared and there was no news from him. No one had heard from him, not until he was found about five months later.

The neighbors told Nao that the man had completely lost it, had lost his mind. That at the beginning, when he was brought back to his family, he had been docile, very friendly and calm. But that weeks later the screams and nightmares began. And that once his memory started to return, he started to become delirious, somewhat insane. That he kept saying that his wife wasn't his wife, that his kids weren't his kids, that his family wasn't his family, that they were all dead. That he had seen them die over and over again. That this wasn't reality, that this was all a dream.

And one night, while they were asleep, one by one he murdered them all. He took their life, just like that. He murdered his wife and three kids without a single thought.

After that, he was sent to a mental institution and was locked away. The man couldn't be sent to prison for his murders, he was completely hysterical, insane. And after many exams and psychological evaluations, he was diagnosed with Schizophrenia, for he was hearing voices as well.

Apparently, about three months in, the man had woken up completely lucid one day. Amnesia gone. And then, committed suicide after he had realized what he had done. That he had murdered his entire family, the people he loved and cherished the most.

The moment Natsuki got back to Garderobe, she was going to meet with Nao, to debrief her properly and get all the details of what she had found. Nao had brought back with her the man's patient file from the mental institution, so she was going to review it, review the tapes and hear his sessions.

"Shizuru, when we arrive, I need to stop by my office and make some calls, so you can head to our quarters without me-" Another blush suddenly appeared on Natsuki's cheeks, " _N-Nani?_ " she tensely asked, for Shizuru's face was so, so close to hers all of a sudden again. She also had that playful smile on her face.

" _Fufu_ , say that last part again, the one about _our quarters_ " Shizuru sing-sang, "I like that part" her lips so close to the blunette's heated cheek, giving her another kiss.

And as she heard the blunette timidly mumbled something, Ruby eyes noticed the two figures walking behind them, walking at their same pace.

She found them odd, for they were wearing very long trench coats for a hot, summer night. And they were looking straight at them.

One of the men was in front with a hand in his right jacket pocket, and the other was following a few steps behind him, holding a piece of paper in his hands, perhaps a photograph, and then she watched him put it away.

Now that she thinks about it, she recognized them, she had seen these guys when they had left the restaurant, right before heading for the Planetarium. They had been standing by a streetlamp right outside.

Were they following them?

Why?

She discretely watched them for a few seconds as she made conversation with the blushing blunette. They were looking straight at her, straight at Natsuki.

What did they want?

Why were they looking at her?

Why?

Right now, right this second, Shizuru's instincts, Shizuru's senses were heightened, were working overdrive. The moment she found an opening, the moment they had reached the corner of the street, she immediately pushed Natsuki to the side, making her fall on the ground,

"O-Oi!"

It all happened so quickly, in a matter of seconds. She hastily turned around, a hand going for the first man's right hand who had quickly drawn a gun on her. She quickly grabbed his hand and raised it,

BOOM!

He had pulled the trigger, but luckily the shot ended up in the air.

She quickly twisted his arm with all her strength, instantly disarming him,

"AAAHHHH!"

And then her right hand connected with his stomach,

POW!

"Ugh~"

Her left hand quickly hit his chest with extreme force,

BAM!

"Argh!"

Pushing him hard, making him fall backwards on the ground.

She quickly grabbed the gun from the floor and pointed it straight to the next guy, straight to his head. She thought and acted so quickly, her movements were so fast. She didn't know she could move like that, didn't know she could punch and fight like that.

"Not a single movement from you" Kyoto-ben calmly commanded, for his hand was reaching for his gun that was hiding in his pocket.

" _Drop the stick, sweetheart"_

"H-Hands… Hands behind your head" Shizuru added, shaking the sudden memory away. This was not the right time to be getting flashes of her past, she was a little busy right now.

"Do it slowly, please" Kyoto-ben added, and then her Ruby eyes watched him do as told.

As she cautiously took a step towards him, wanting to disarm him, she heard the blunette's hasty steps.

"Stay where you are, Natsuki. Keep your distance… Please, do not fight me on this" She strictly warned her while taking the gun away from the man, not for one second removing Ruby eyes off him.

Then, she reached for his left, chest pocket. That's where she'd seen him put away the piece of paper less than a minute ago.

Ruby eyes quickly scanned the piece of paper. It was a picture, a picture of Natsuki. This was taken two weeks ago at the summit in Aries. She remembered the clothing, remembered what the blunette was wearing that day.

"Shizuru?" Natsuki said her name, not understanding what was happening right now and who the hell these two guys were. She had a million questions on her mind.

But Shizuru didn't answer her. Instead, "May I ask why you are following Natsuki?" she asked the man in front of her. She was as serene as ever. As composed as ever. She was like her old self again.

But the man, he didn't reply to her. Not a word was heard from his smug lips.

"Let's try this again, ne? It is rude not to answer the questions when someone asks them" She didn't like his silence, didn't like his confidence, his calmness. He was defying her.

Did he think she wouldn't pull the trigger?

Was he not afraid?

"Who sent you?" She patiently asked him again, her Kyoto-ben making the words sound so, so sweet. "Why are you following her?"

And then he willingly took a step forward, the gun now touching his smooth, tanned forehead.

But Shizuru didn't move, didn't flinch. She wasn't scared of him. "What were your orders?"

And then he grinned at her. He could give her an answer to that.

"To eliminate the _Gakuenchou_ "

And after those words were said, that's when she heard it,

\- Beep Beep -

Heard the faint sound, the rapid beeps. She could only hear it because she was standing so close to him.

\- Beep Beep Beep -

And then she noticed that the other guy was starting to nervously crawl away, keeping some distance from them. From _him_. So, she herself, subconsciously took a step back as well.

\- Beep Beep Beep Beep -

"Natsuki Kruger!" The man's angry eyes fell upon mentioned woman, "My Nation does not approve of your new Otome laws!"

\- Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep -

"DIE, OTOME SCUM!"

Her Ruby eyes widened in realization, "He's got explosives on him…" and then, she got in front of the man, arms spread, not allowing him to get any closer to the blunette.

"N-Natsuki, RUN!" She shouted at the woman, at the love of her life. She would protect her no matter what.

This man, he had a bomb on him, perhaps a close-range one, and it was about to detonate any given second.

This man did not care for his life at all.

And Natsuki quickly sprang into action, "MATERIALIZE!" and while she ran towards the brunette she transformed into her Robe. "Shizuru!" She quickly grabbed her and pulled her away from the man.

\- BEEEEEEEEEEEEP -

And tried to add some distance between them, to shield Shizuru as best she could as the bomb went off.

BOOM!

But there wasn't enough time, she wasn't able to fly away, to flee on time. The force of the impact pushing her forward, making them fall on the ground.

THUD!

Shizuru winced, the back of her head had hit the floor, had hit the pavement with force.

And all Shizuru could see before giving-in to the light, before becoming unconscious, was red. Red rain.

She could feel drops of it landing on her white, porcelain face.

" _These particles in her blood, they allow her to heal…"_

" _Prepare the machine, my son, we'll do a Blood Wash and remove them from her bloodstream"_

And along with the bloody rain, came the memories of her lucid, captive days.

"Damn it!" Natsuki hissed, pushing herself off the brunette. She had taken most of the impact, but since she was equipped in her Robe it did nothing to her, there was not a scratch on her.

Emerald eyes looked behind her, at the man. There was nothing left of him, only blood everywhere.

And then, Emerald eyes fell below her, fell on the brunette's unresponsive form.

"Shizuru, are you okay?" Her hand went for the brunette's face, went for her left cheek. "Hey..." And when she touched her there, her head tilted to the side on its own.

"Shizuru?"

And then she noticed the small trail of blood that had started escaping from the brunette's nose. She was bleeding internally, this was Shizuru's blood.

"N-No no no no no no no" Natsuki quickly said in a hushed tone, in a desperate whisper, "Don't do this to me" instantly raising to a sitting position and hovering over the woman she loved.

"Shizuru, w-wake up..." Her hands desperately touched her lover's bloody face, touching her cheeks, opening her eyes for her, "I need you to wake up... P-Please, please wake up" and then, she tried to calm down.

Tried to breathe, to think.

She quickly rested her head, rested her ear on Shizuru's chest. She noticed she was barely breathing, and that her heart was beating. She could hear the _Doki Doki_ sound; it was faint, but it was there.

She slowly grabbed her and carefully carried her bridal style, resting her head against her chest not wanting to move her too much, not wanting to cause any more harm to her. And then, started to make her slow ascend in the air.

The other guy, he was laying on the ground, unresponsive as well, but she couldn't deal with him right now. Couldn't think of anything else but her lover right now.

She could hear the sirens approaching, so she knew he would be taken care of. She will find him later and question him, make him pay for this. Right now, she needed to take care of Shizuru. Needed to go back to Garderobe right away.

And while Shizuru was under, while she was unconscious, she was perfectly aware of her surroundings somehow, at least for a little while.

She could hear the sound of the wind against her ears. Could feel the air in between her fingers, tickling her skin. Could smell Natsuki's scent, the one produced by her own body, because Natsuki wasn't wearing perfume, not tonight. Could hear the frantic beat of the blunette's heart.

… _I'm safe…_ Shizuru thought, _…I'm with Natsuki…_ And she completely surrendered, gave in, completely succumbed to the bright lights that called her, that pulled her in.

And when she finally opened her Ruby eyes again, when she was strong enough to do so, she was disoriented, confused.

She wasn't with Natsuki, she was no longer in her lover's embrace.

She had found herself unmoving, standing still, staring ahead.

Yes, staring ahead.

Staring ahead at a familiar, old, long, dark hallway.

And then, she tilted her head downwards and looked at her hands. Looked at her hands to find that they weren't her soft, delicate, feminine hands. They were a man's hands.

And then she grabbed the camera that was hanging by a strap from her neck, and she used the large lens as a mirror, used it to look at her face.

And when she did, when she stared at her reflection, she didn't see herself, it wasn't her, she saw a different face. Saw his face.

This wasn't her body.

She wasn't in Wind Bloom.

She was back in that place. That cold, dark, miserable, godforsaken place.

And she was wearing her captor's face.

 **\- 0 -**

* * *

 **Thanks for Reading!**

 **And Thanks for the Reviews/Comments/ PMs**

 **I think this is a good stopping point. I like to post whatever I have on Wednesdays. Wednesdays are my personal deadline (otherwise I will never post lol) But since I doubt I'll have time to write, not for a few more days anyway, I'm posting this a day early.**

 **I didn't think I'd have anything to post this week since I've been busy, but I did have a little time to write yesterday.**

 **I hope I'm not confusing anyone, I think I have multiple things going on in this story, but hopefully they will all get resolved by the end. If not, I shall post a special chapter, I don't like loose ends.**

 **Oh and the reviewer called Cami: Yo hablo español, no te preocupes puedes escribir tu Review en Español. Aunque tu inglés no está nada mal ;)**

 **Let me know what you guys think of the chapter/story so far!**

" **For the love of ShizNat"**


	14. Chapter 14

**In the Darkness**

 **A Mai Otome ShizNat Story**

 **Chapter 14**

"Please wake up" Was the whisper.

Natsuki was on the floor, on her knees. Her Emerald eyes were tightly closed, and both of her hands were holding onto one of the brunette's hands.

"Please, p-please wake up"

They had arrived at Garderobe an hour and a half ago. The moment she had landed with Shizuru in her arms, the moment her feet had touched the ground, she had immediately rushed to medical bay where Youko waited for them, the Healing Chamber was on and ready for her.

It had only taken Natsuki five minutes to arrive at the Academy since the place where the bomb had detonated, the place where Shizuru had lost consciousness, wasn't very far; not when the form of transportation was flying.

She had gently laid the brunette on the Healing Chamber, had quickly gotten rid of her bloody, yellow-honey dress, and had removed her white sandals, leaving her only in her lacy, white undergarments.

She had impatiently stood next to the Chamber, both of her hands on the glass the whole time, not wanting to part from her, waiting for it to do its job in healing the brunette's internal wounds. Waiting for it to repair her broken blood vessels, and whatever else had gotten injured in the impact as well, both internally and externally.

She had hoped that when the twenty minutes had passed and the Chamber opened once again, that the brunette would already be awake, anger in full force, ready to yell at her for putting her in there in the first place.

But no, Shizuru didn't wake up. She had been unconscious, unresponsive all this time. And Natsuki, she was a total mess, a nervous wreck.

"I-I'm not as strong as you think I am, Shizuru…" Natsuki voiced through trembling lips. Her head dipped lower, her forehead touching the brunette's soft hand. "While you were missing, I wasn't strong, I-I was lost, so lost… I was someone you wouldn't recognize, someone you wouldn't have been proud of..."

Yes, those two years that the brunette had been missing Natsuki could barely recognize herself. Those were the hardest two years of her life.

She was missing her lover, her confidant and best friend. And with every passing day that there wasn't any news from her, she fell deeper and deeper into the hands of depression, the hands of despair. She could barely get out of bed, could barely do her job. She was only able to do it because she had a lot of help and support from her colleagues and friends. And more than once she thought of renouncing her position as a Column, because she couldn't focus, because she wasn't giving it her all; her heart and mind wasn't in it at all, not anymore.

She couldn't think of anything else other than Shizuru. Was always wondering where Shizuru was, if she was okay, if she was unharmed. Whether she was dead or alive. The lack of news was slowly weakening her, slowly killing her. She was only able to survive those two, long years because she still held hope that the brunette would one day come back to her. That the brunette would come back and lighten her world with that sweet, playful smile of hers.

"I can't lose you again, Shizuru. I-I can't" Natsuki's tears were freely falling now. The salty liquid was running down her cheeks and landing one by one on the brunette's hand. "I won't be able to handle it, not again. So I need you to be okay, I need you to wake up" And she begged again, these words that had become her mantra since Shizuru had become unconscious, "P-Please, please wake up… I love you, I need you… Please, Shizuru, p-please wake up"

About two minutes later, Youko entered the room and joined the silently sobbing blunette. She walked over to her and stood a few steps behind her, giving her time, waiting for her to compose herself. It broke her heart seeing her like this.

She had gone over to the lab to grab an IV bag, along with the Nanomachine serum. She had told Natsuki that the Nanomachines could help with Shizuru's comatose state, that it could help her regain consciousness.

The Healing Chamber had done its job in healing the brunette's internal wounds. But she has yet to wake up. She wasn't responding to any of the stimuli tests, wasn't responding to pain, light or sound. It wasn't one hundred percent certain that the Nanomachines would work, but the possibilities of a positive outcome were very high.

The Nanomachines were powerful, very powerful. They were Shizuru's best option and only hope.

"Natsuki…"

" _Hai_ " Natsuki whispered her reply, not bothering to turn around or raise her head.

"Have you made a decision?" And after a short pause, "What would you like me to do? We can't wait much longer"

The _Gakuenchou_ let out a shaky, long breath, torn with the current choice she had to make:

Should she give the go ahead to administer the Nanomachines into Shizuru's bloodstream or not? Should she do it or wait for Shizuru to wake up on her own?

She knew that Shizuru wouldn't approve of this, of using the Nanomachines, of injecting her, of the needles. She just knew it. But the longer they waited, the longer Shizuru remained like this, remained in this unconscious, comatose state, the higher the possibility that long-term impairment may occur in her brain, more so since this was caused by trauma, was caused by being hit on the head.

" _Hai_ , please prepare the Nanomachine solution, Youko" Natsuki finally answered, her voice sounding hoarser than usual because of all the crying she had done.

She would have to deal with Shizuru's wrath if, no, _when_ she awakes. She had to be positive, she had to believe that Shizuru would wake up.

If Shizuru wanted to break up with her and never talk to her again, never see her again because of this, then fine, she was okay with that, she could learn to live with it.

But Shizuru dying?

No, not okay.

Shizuru possibly remaining in this comatose state for the rest of her life?

No, not okay.

This had to be done. They couldn't wait for her to wake up on her own. The stakes were high, it had to be this way.

"This is for the best, Natsuki… I'm sure Shizuru-san will understand" Youko sympathetically added before walking away, before heading to her desk to prepare the IV bag with the Nanomachine serum.

She, like Natsuki, knew how much Shizuru hated being around needles, hated being poked around, hated being in here in general.

Youko was sure that this was because of a traumatic event, a severely distressful event hidden in the brunette's mind. Shizuru never opened up, never talked about her time away, never said if she was starting to remember about those days or not. And she had stopped asking her, not wanting to press, not wanting to stress her out even more about it.

She was sure that Shizuru would open up to her eventually. Sooner rather than later, hopefully, so that they could figure out where the hell she had been and if anything had been done to her to make her like this. If her amnesia, if the lack of Nanomachines in her body, were done to her on purpose.

Natsuki had mentioned to her this morning that Shizuru remembered the morning she disappeared, that she remembered seeing a blackhole, a portal of some sort.

And Youko found herself asking if this portal was man-made or not. If it was manufactured or if it was just one of those mysteries that popped out of nowhere every so often, appeared out of nowhere when the conditions were just right.

Youko knew that portals usually worked one way, especially man-made ones. She couldn't will it to open. The opening, the door, was on the other side, and whomever was on the other side controlled it and had the advantage. Only they could open it.

She had investigated that area, that desert, extensively. Had done all imaginable tests and found nothing. Science itself couldn't explain the whys, science itself couldn't give her the answers she was seeking. There weren't any anomalies, anything that could explain why the portal always opened there of all places, and if it appeared on it's own.

The only thing Youko could think of was that perhaps that desert had similar attributes to where the opening, where door was, _if_ the portal was man-made, that is. Similar attributes to where the brunette had been. Nothing else could explain it.

All they could do was wait for the portal to open again. And hope that it stayed open long enough for them to walk inside it and put an end to this, prevent it from happening again.

 **Meanwhile,**

 **Planet Earth**

Shizuru quietly, slowly walked the dark aisles of the large, poorly lit underground facility. She was taking in her surroundings, trying to open any door she could find as she walked. This place was huge, was a maze, for all she knew she was walking around in circles. Everything looked exactly the same.

She noticed that she couldn't walk fast, couldn't react fast enough. Noticed that she couldn't smell, feel, or talk. She was easily exposed, tactless, mute, and numb.

… _Am I dreaming?..._ Was the thought that kept repeating in her head, _…This must be a dream, this can't be real…_

She had been in this place, in this body for over an hour now, almost two, and she couldn't comprehend how or why. This didn't make any sense to her. It just didn't. This was totally incredulous, insane even.

"Wait up, Miracle!"

Shizuru stopped walking for she had heard a sudden shout, and then heard hasty steps approaching her. She hadn't encountered anyone in this place yet, so she didn't know what to do. And on top of that, there was nowhere to hide. All the doors in this hallway were locked.

She then decided to start walking again, to act as normal as she possibly could. And as she was about to take a step forward, whomever was approaching her, came to full view, coming to a complete halt a few steps in front of her.

Shizuru stood completely still again, eyeing the small intruder. It was a little girl, a beautiful little girl. And she was staring at her, well, at _him_ , rather curiously with those beautiful, bright, pink eyes.

… _Radiation?..._ Shizuru thought, for those eyes had a very strange, haunting glow.

"Ah, there you are!" The girl's father caught up to her, totally out of breath. "I told you many times not to go running off like that, Miracle. It's too dark and you could get hurt" And after he said this, he looked up at her and their eyes met.

"Oh, Ichiro-kun, strange seeing you so far away from the lab" The man awkwardly greeted. "Did you or your father need anything?"

But Shizuru couldn't reply, couldn't talk. She remained silent and watched as the man and his daughter walked closer, approached her.

"Your eyes are red, Ichiro-kun…" The man acknowledged, "Are you feeling alright? Another experiment gone wrong?" It was the only explanation he could think of as to why his eyes weren't the usual, bright blue.

And all Shizuru could do was slowly nod her head yes.

Her Ruby eyes then fell on the quiet, little girl. She was holding onto her father's leg with one hand, the other was in her mouth, generously sucking her thumb.

Shizuru raised her hand, her fingers slowly waving 'hello' to her, and then watched as the little girl smiled and mimicked her actions, waving in return.

"Huh, she likes you…" The man noticed, eyebrows arching in surprise. "She usually doesn't interact with anyone"

And upon hearing this, Shizuru tried to smile at her, to soften her features and be friendly, not to seem too scary, but she couldn't. Emotion was another thing she couldn't do, couldn't express, couldn't show while in this body.

Ruby eyes then watched as the little girl tapped on her father's leg. Watched as she removed her thumb from her mouth, and slowly moved her hands, communicating with him through sign language. _…Ara~ I see…_ It seemed like the little girl couldn't talk, had lost her voice from early on.

"Okay, one second" The man replied to her. Then, faced Ichiro's direction again. "We've gotta go… Have some rest, Ichiro-kun, your eyes are unnaturally red"

And with that, the man and his daughter walked away, the little girl waving and staring at her, well, _him_ , as they left.

… _Kawaii…_ Shizuru slowly waved goodbye as well. _…I wonder if the radiation took her voice…_ And once they were out of sight, she stood there and remained unmoving, staring ahead.

She noticed that her movements were becoming slower, much slower than before, and noticed there was a faint, ringing sound in her ears, the faint sound becoming louder and louder as the seconds ticked by.

And her vision, her vision started to blur, everything in front of her was starting to become a soft, off-white.

"Son? What are you doing here?"

A voice came from behind her, and her heart instantly raised by that sound, by that voice. She recognized that mature, manly voice. It was unmistakable, it haunted her sleep almost every night.

"I asked you to rest tonight…"

She wished she had full control of this body still, wished she could turn around. If she did, she could end him right there. Could grab his neck and strangle him until his head was detached from his miserable shoulders.

She wanted his blood.

She wanted him dead.

He was the one who tortured her, who broke her, who did this to her.

"Son?"

And Ichiro slowly blinked, slowly recouped control of his actions, of his senses, of his body. His bright, blue eyes slowly taking in his new surroundings.

… _How… did I get here?..._ He asked himself, perplexed, for this was not the hallway that lead to his bedroom.

He doesn't remember walking there, doesn't remember how he got there at all.

… _Could it be-..._ But he shook that thought away. There was no way for someone to have gotten into his head, no way he could've been possessed. He had been wide awake! The only person who could possibly do that was the brunette, for the _undetectable_ , neon-yellow serum was also coursing through her veins.

There was no way though, she was in another planet, she was many lightyears away. And she didn't have access to the helmet that allowed them to connect to each other's minds. Without the helmet, there was no way to connect. It just wasn't possible.

And it was also unheard of, for the one who was being controlled to suddenly switch and be the one in control. It has never happened before.

… _I've been working hard, I just need to rest…_ So yes, he dismissed the silly, very implausible thought.

"Is something the matter, son?" The father questioned once he had reached him, for Ichiro had stayed unusually quiet for too long.

"No, father…" Ichiro softly replied, blue eyes now staring at his father's hazel ones. "I just got lost in thought, that's all"

 **Same time,**

 **Garderobe**

"Nn…" A small groan escaped Shizuru's lips as she slowly regained consciousness, as she came back to her senses.

She gently raised to a sitting position on the bed, "Nnn" softly groaning, a hand going for her closed eyes, shielding them from the uncomfortable, fluorescent lights. Not to mention she had a massive headache, her head was throbbing, pulsing in pain.

… _Was it all a dream?..._ Was the thought. She was puzzled, confused as to what had just happened, what she had just experienced, _…But it seemed so real. And those people, that little girl, there's no way I could've made her up…_ It was so confusing, so alarming, _…What is happening to me? What did they do to me?..._

First the voices, now this? What was this anyway? Was she hallucinating? She didn't know what to make out of it.

"Shizuru?"

She then heard that voice, that soft yet husky voice that she loved and adored. And then, suddenly, what had happened prior to blacking out came back to her,

the men,

the gun,

the fight,

the bomb.

Her heart instantly raised in alarm, in fear.

"N-Natsuki!" She quickly reached out for the blunette who was kneeling next to her. "Natsuki!" Her hands raised, desperately touching her lover's arms, her neck, her face. Ruby eyes looking at her, inspecting her, making sure she was indeed okay.

"A-Are you harmed, are you hurt?" She anxiously asked the love of her life, her reason to breathe, purpose to live. She loved this woman with all her soul. There weren't words that could properly explain or express the strong feelings she held for her. Natsuki was everything to her, meant everything to her.

Natsuki nodded, quickly assuring her, "Don't worry, Shizuru, I'm okay… Lay back on the bed, please" She tried to contain her tears, her emotions. She felt such a sense of relief that Shizuru had opened her eyes, that she seemed to be okay, seemed alert and fine. "I-I'm glad you're finally awake. You were unconscious for almost two hours, we didn't know-"

And Shizuru cut her off by sealing her lips with hers, by desperately kissing her. "I-I love you, Kruger, Natsuki" She told her between kisses. "I-I love you" It was the first time she had willingly, consciously said those words. She wasn't sure what was preventing her from saying them before, why she had hesitated in the past. "I love you so much" But not anymore, "I love you" she couldn't stop saying them now.

The thought of losing her, it must've hit a nerve, must've struck deep within somehow. Or perhaps, since her memory was improving every day, she was remembering just how much she really felt for her, how deep she felt for her. How she couldn't live without her.

"And I love you, Shizuru"

She heard the blunette whisper and she smiled because of this, all the while caressing her moist cheeks.

But then, she suddenly stopped, for she felt something pinching her right arm, nipping her veins. Her eyes widened when she saw an IV drip there, when she saw the needle penetrating her skin.

"W-What is this?"

"Shizuru, let me explain…"

"W-What have you done?" Her panic raising, her left hand going for the needle, about to yank it out of her body herself,

"Shizuru, stop!" But Natsuki quickly grabbed her hands, preventing her from doing this. "Shizuru, stop it!" She wished the brunette would just calm down. "I'll take care of it, just wait… just relax. Breathe" She could see that the brunette was hyperventilating, her chest quickly falling and rising in distress. She wasn't listening, she couldn't keep still.

"I'll take care of it, just don't move" She repeated, tried to calm her. And when Shizuru stopped moving, after she had calmed down just enough "See?" she went ahead and carefully removed the needle from her arm.

She quickly put it away, put it on the nearby table and covered it with a white napkin. "It's gone… It's okay, Shizuru"

And Shizuru's hands were shaking, her body trembling. Her Ruby eyes were on the napkin, the napkin that was covering the needle.

And then, those eyes of hers followed the cord that was attached to the needle, and it led her to the IV bag, and the IV bag was _still full_ , it had a bright, red liquid inside.

" _Prepare the machine, my son, we'll do a Blood Wash and remove them from her bloodstream"_

"Blood wash…" Shizuru whispered as she tried to control her breathing. She had said it so softly only she could hear this.

" _How long do you think I'll take to distort her memories?"_

" _I'm not sure, father… Her mind is too complex, it might take six months, a year at most?"_

" _I see, I'll start working on the machine, then. We haven't used it in so long"_

" _In the Darkness, father?"_

" _Yes, my son"_

"In the Darkness…" Shizuru whispered again, entranced by her vision. Her eyes weren't blinking, her eyes never leaving the IV bag. Her shaking had stopped, and her breathing was normal again. Panic, poof, gone.

In her vision, as the father and son talked, she had been strapped down on a bed. The young man was standing next to her, a syringe in his hands, about to start injecting a neon-yellow serum in her veins.

… _That must be what caused the amnesia…_ Shizuru thought, unable to get the image out of her head.

"Is something wrong, Shizuru?" The blunette asked. She had been sitting on the bed next to her, and she didn't like the far away expression on her face. She seemed void of all emotion, she looked so empty, so lost. As if she wasn't there at all.

"Shizuru, look at me" Her hand went for the brunette's cheek and lovingly caressed her there. "Come back to me, don't leave me…"

And within seconds, Shizuru did, she softly smiled at her and leaned into the gesture, and then she moved forward and placed the softest of kisses on the blunette's lips.

And then, a moment later,

"Oh, finally awake"

Shizuru and Natsuki parted from their kiss and faced the direction of the approaching visitor, giving her their attention.

" _Ara, Ara,_ lip-locking and without clothes on, things are going to get steamy soon, eh?" Nao snickered, noticing the brunette's current state of dress. "The name of that Chamber should be changed to Chamber of Love"

No one could hear this though for she had muttered it and was still quite a distance away.

"It's been a while, Juliet-san" Shizuru smilingly greeted in a sing-song way. "You were greatly missed in Garderobe" She hadn't seen the insolent Column in a couple of days. Was she out on a mission? She didn't say goodbye to her before she left. How rude of her…

"I wish I could say the same" And Nao, instead of glaring at Shizuru for calling her by _that name_ , glared at Natsuki in annoyance, as if Shizuru's doing was all the _Gakuenchou's_ fault.

She always took out all of Shizuru's doings on Natsuki. Always. She had to take it out on someone since she didn't want to mess with Shizuru. And Natsuki was her partner and was always so easy to annoy. It brought her pure joy.

"Word around Garderobe is you two are playing house now, how sweet" She continued in her sweetest, mocking voice, now standing in front of the couple with her hands behind her neck.

" _N-Nani?_ " And Natsuki, her face, it lit up like a Christmas lightbulb in an instant, wondering how this news had gotten out so fast. It was only last night she had asked the woman to move in with her. And to her knowledge, only Mai knew. Mai had been the only person she had told.

How on Earl news spread so fast in this place was beyond Natsuki's comprehension.

" _Fufu_ , Juliet-san heard right" Was Shizuru's joyful reply, "Does she want to play house with us? We can't wait to start a family…" Her hand went for Nao's face, caressing her now very, _very_ blushing cheek. "Do you want to be our baby girl, Juliet-san? We'll take good care of you"

Nao's right eye uncontrollably twitched, speechless for a few seconds, "Y-You-?!" Her lips couldn't stop trembling, her eyes just couldn't stop twitching, she was totally caught off guard by this.

Plus, the touching, Shizuru never dared touch her before, not even when she was a student.

Nao pursed her lips and took a step back, and then another and another, and wordlessly left medical bay with very heated cheeks, blushing in annoyance, and a million curse words in her mind.

" _Fufu_ "

And as Shizuru giggled, all Natsuki could do was sigh. She watched as Nao walked away, knowing the young Column was going to give her a hard time about this at some point. Tease her relentless with her sly comments and remarks.

About five minutes after Nao's departure, Youko showed up. She examined Shizuru, examined her motor skills and such, making sure she had gotten out of her comatose state alright. Shizuru passed all the exams so she let her return to her quarters that same night.

During the examination, however, Youko did make conversation with Shizuru and asked her a few things. Asked her if while she was in her comatose state, if she could hear them when they talked to her, or if she had any dreams. Because while Shizuru was like this, Youko did monitor her brain activity, and noticed that a section of her brain that should've been asleep seemed active, seemed very alert. Youko thought that perhaps Shizuru was conscious but couldn't communicate.

Shizuru had warily replied yes to the dreaming question, because it had to be a dream, right? But she didn't elaborate on what she saw, she kept that to herself.

And after the examination, after Youko had okay'ed her to go, she had picked up her belongings, worn a robe, and had gone straight to her quarters with Natsuki by her side. She had taken a long, warm shower, which helped her relax, helped her think and calm her mind.

" _Kannin na_ for worrying you, Natsuki" Shizuru sincerely apologized to the blunette. She was sitting in front of the vanity, already in her sleepwear, and was now gently and very cautiously brushing her hair for her cranium still hurt a little bit.

She could see what the blunette was doing from her reflection in the mirror. She was sitting by the edge of the bed, one leg crossed over the other, facing her. She was already in her sleepwear as well for they had showered together, and had a towel on her wet head, rubbing it to towel dry her hair.

"I'm just glad you're okay" Was the husky reply.

"Where you able to find out anything about the attempt on your life?"

Natsuki stopped what she was doing and let out a soft sigh. Honestly, she hadn't had the time to think about it. All of her thoughts and energy since the attempt were on Shizuru and her wellbeing.

"No, not yet" She answered, "I will contact the authorities tomorrow morning and find out where they have taken the man that attacked us" adding, " _if_ he survived that explosion" She then watched as Shizuru placed the brush on the vanity and started walking towards her.

"Is this the reason you didn't want me to attend the summit with you? Did you think this would've happened then?" The brunette asked as she straddled her lover's hips, her hands going for the white towel, continuing to dry her cobalt hair for her.

The day of the summit, Natsuki had asked her to stay in the hotel room, had asked her not to join her in the conference. She didn't tell her why, just asked her to stay indoors and to watch it from the television, that it would be aired around the hotel for those who couldn't make it inside. The room was large, very large, but it couldn't accommodate everyone.

Natsuki nodded her reply, her hands now on the brunette's thighs. Her fingers were drawing small, imaginary circles there. "I was expecting some sort of retaliation that day, some opposition, which there was… but no, I was not expecting an attempt on my life. Someone in their right mind wouldn't do that, not in a room filled with diplomats and Otomes" She spoke her mind.

"Is this really worth pursuing, Natsuki?" Came the serious question.

"It is" Was the soft, honest answer. "The Nations are at peace, it is the perfect time to start pursuing this, to amend the laws… I know change won't happen today, or tomorrow, but someday, someday the world will be a safe place and it will not need Otomes anymore"

"I'm behind you, Natsuki, no matter what you decide to do…" Kyoto-ben was sincere with her. She stopped drying her hair and placed the damped towel aside on the bed. "but someone tried to kill you today because of this" Her hands now on Natsuki's neck, her thumbs caressing her cheeks. "If they would've succeeded, I-"

"But they didn't" Natsuki whispered, interrupted as she pulled her closer, their noses were now touching. She went ahead and kissed the brunette's cheek as she talked to her. "You saw right through the ambush, you protected me" And then added, "Promise me you won't do that again, don't risk your life for me, Shizuru"

"I can't promise Natsuki such a thing" Shizuru tilted her head back and closed her eyes, biting her lower lip in the process. Natsuki's tip of her nose was tickling, touching her cheek, going down to her neck. She could feel her warm breath there, could feel her lips grazing that delicate, sensitive area.

"How are you feeling, Shizuru?" Natsuki could feel Shizuru's breasts perking up in arousal. She didn't mean to do this, to get so close, to touch her like this. Didn't mean to start this, to start what would ultimately lead them to making love. Not when there were so many things on their minds. So many worries, many things that needed to be resolved.

"Mm~" And Shizuru could only moan in response at first, "If Natsuki stops now I will be the one who'll take her life" Kyoto-ben warned her, feeling Natsuki's hands traveling up her waist, going higher and higher, until they grazed the side, grazed the curve of her very perky breasts.

"Natsuki…" Her heart was raising now, her breaths becoming more elaborate, shorter and quicker. She was hot. So, so hot. The throbbing in between her thighs now impossible to ignore.

"Make love to me..." She whispered to her, her hands pulling Natsuki away from her neck to guide her to her lips. "Make me yours" Their eyes meeting. Their mouths touching but not kissing, not yet.

"I'll be very gentle tonight, I promise…"

And with that reply, their lips met, engaging in a long, soft, amorous kiss. Sleepwear being discarded as the kiss progressed, as the kiss intensified with every stroke of the tongue.

And once the clothes were off, Natsuki gently lay Shizuru on the bed and settled herself in between her warm, delicious legs, spreading them for her.

She placed kisses all over the brunette's naked body, showing her appreciation, love and devotion through the touch.

And when Shizuru was ready, when she was ready for the rocking motion, for the swing of hips that drove her completely wild, she complied right away, didn't wait for her to beg.

She pressed her body against her, she ground against her so gently, so slowly, her Emerald eyes never leaving the brunette's beautiful, blushing face, not until after she came.

 **About an Hour Later…**

"Natsuki?" Shizuru let out in hushed Kyoto-ben, "Are you awake?" She wanted to make sure the blunette was deep asleep before she left the bed.

Their love making sessions never took long. Natsuki knew just where and how to touch her, how to make her feel good. Once she was in the mood, once she was aroused, in five minutes tops she came. Which was nice because then they could go for seconds or thirds if they weren't too tired.

"Natsuki?" Shizuru tried again, her voice a little louder, testing her. And to be completely sure she poked on her cheek a couple of times to see if she stirred.

Shizuru then gently left the bed and walked over to the closet, opening it once she had arrived there. She hadn't moved any of her belongings yet, so the closet was basically empty, it only had the few items she purchased today.

She reached for her purse, glad she had left it in the car and not taken it with her to the Planetarium. Otherwise, she would've lost the books because of the incident that happened afterwards.

She opened her purse and reached for the books, taking out the one titled, _Dark Tech: Successes and Failures of Technology Throughout Time_.

She contemplated for a moment if she should take these to her old room, if she should read there, but then thought that if Natsuki awoke and didn't find her there she would worry and search for her.

So, she decided to read there, read in bed. She wasn't going to take long anyway, not tonight. She was just curious about something, about something she remembered a couple of hours ago.

She opened the book and flipped the pages, going all the way to the end, searching for the _Index_ page. She went for the _B's_ and looked up _Blood Wash_.

And an eyebrow instantly raised, because honestly, she didn't think she'd find it there, but she did. It looked like her luck was finally turning around.

She went to the indicated page, and she silently read what it entailed, not once, but two times to make sure she understood correctly.

Basically, from her understanding, it was like the water purifying concept, the water filtering process. The book said that the process varied depending on the equipment used, but that overall it had the same outcome. The blood comes out of the arm, goes through a filtering process, storing the targeted particles aside, and then goes back into the body through the other arm. It said that Blood Washing, depending on how updated the equipment was, could take anywhere from a day to up to a week, the blood going through the cycle a few times. It also said that it was classified as Successful Technology, because it helped save many lives in times of disease and plague.

… _So this is how the Nanomachines went missing from my body…_ Shizuru thought in realization.

Youko had asked her a few weeks ago if she remembered being injured while away, if she remembered loosing a lot of blood, but Shizuru couldn't answer, she didn't know.

But now she knows.

… _What could they possibly want with it?…_ Came the thought.

She then went back to the _Index_ page, looking for the next word, looking for _In the Darkness_.

And then she paused, she swallowed when she had found it there.

Yes, swallowed.

Not because she had found the word, no, that wasn't it, but because she just realized something about this technology, about this book. Realized something crucial, something very important.

This book, this technology, was written and put together by her own ancestors. If she found the technology in this book, it could only mean one thing:

"Was I on Earth?"

 **\- 0 -**

* * *

 **Thanks for Reading!**

 **And Thanks for the Reviews/Comments**

 **I was going to post this next Wednesday, but since it's ready and it continues where the previous chapter left off, I decided to go ahead and post today, since the previous chapter is still fresh on your minds. So, you guys have two chapters from me this week :)**

 **ShizNatForever: You wanted Shizuru and Nao to exchange words one more time before the fic was over? Here it is :) hope it was to your satisfaction.**

 **I browsed the Mai Hime fandom today, and not many authors are writing in English (Mostly Spanish Fics) What's happening? LOL Where are the writers? I haven't read FanFiction in years. And while I'm writing I try to get away from it, because then everything gets all jumbled and messy in my head, and I'm trying to be as original as I can. I can't wait to read what other writers have come up with once I'm done with this story though, I've got years of reading to do.**

 **Speaking of which, we're almost at the end guys!**

 **Let me know what you guys think! Criticism, negative or positive is always welcomed :) It makes the Author think**

 **"For the love of ShizNat"**


	15. Chapter 15

**In the Darkness**

 **A Mai Otome ShizNat Story**

 **Chapter 15**

" _Mom?"_

" _Yes, darling"_

 _"May I ask you a question?"_

 _"Sure, what's on your mind?"_

" _What does love feel like?"_

" _Love?... Hmm, it's one of the hardest sentiments to explain…"_

" _Why is that?"_

" _Because, it's different for everyone. Not everyone feels it and experiences it the same"_

" _Ara~ Then how will I know when I have fallen in love?"_

" _Oh, don't worry, Shizuru… When you feel it, you'll know. It is unmistakable…"_

Shizuru smiled at the sudden memory. She was laying on her left side, staring at her lovers' calm, sleeping face. She had been thinking about that word, about love just a moment ago, thinking about her feelings for the blunette. This must've triggered the memory to come to her.

… _Mother was right…_ Was the thought, _…The feeling, it is unmistakable, it can't be missed…_

If she could describe the feeling to her mother now, or at least the positive feelings, for she knew very well that love and pain, joy and sorrow came hand in hand, she would say to her what she was about to whisper to the sleeping blunette:

"My heart feels warm with joy, like when the sun touches my face in the coldest winter" Her right, index finger went for Natsuki's face, the tip of it going for the bridge of her nose,

"and it beats so fast, so wild, like the tiny wings of a hummingbird" and then that finger slowly moved downwards in a straight line, gently touching her there,

"and when she looks at me, when she smiles at me, I feel goosebumps everywhere, like when a sudden, cold breeze touches my bare skin on a hot summer night" and when she reached the tip of her lover's nose, she moved her hand to its previous position, moved it back to the blunette's waist, for the touch had made Natsuki stir just a little bit,

"It's a wonderful feeling finding _the one_ you're meant to be with, it's a wonderful feeling being in love" and she moved forward, leaned in the short distance and gently kissed the tip of her lover's nose, causing Natsuki to stir yet again, to snuggle closer to her afterwards.

From the memory she just had, by how immature her own voice had sounded, she could tell she was probably twelve, perhaps thirteen years old at the time. It was the first memory she'd ever gotten prior to being a Coral, prior to enrolling in Garderobe. The first memory she had ever gotten where she had seen one of her parents.

She still had no recollection of her childhood days, no recollection of how she was when she was a kid, or of how she and her parents were. Whether she got along well with them or not, whether they were close or not. And from the few pictures that she has in that white box in her closet, it seemed like they were. Those smiles on their faces, they were genuine, they weren't forced nor fake. She could tell because of the way their smiles reached their eyes, because of how close they stood next to one another, invading each other's personal space.

In the current memory, she and her mother were sitting on a large blanket at the park, having a picnic. Her father, however, was nowhere in sight. It was a sunny day, and they were surrounded by green grass, wild, colorful flowers, and large trees. There was not a skyscraper in sight, not one. The sky stretched for miles and miles and miles, so she guessed they must've not been in Wind Bloom, they must've been out in the countryside somewhere. In Wind Bloom, everywhere you turned you could see a building or structure from far away, obstructing the beautiful blue.

In her memory, she noticed that her mother didn't have an accent, so Shizuru guessed she must've gotten it from her father. She also wondered if her parents were together or if they were divorced, because it was odd for her to have such a thick accent if she lived with both of her parents. It would've mellowed, softened somehow.

Or who knows? Perhaps her father was the homemaker and spent the most time with her since the moment she was born, hence her thick accent, and her mother was the one who worked? Perhaps she traveled all over Earl and spent very little time at home?

Unfortunately, she wouldn't know the answer to those questions until all the memories came back to her, none of that information was in her diary. She had started keeping the diary the day she had enrolled Garderobe, after her parents had passed away. And she didn't mention them in there at all. It was not in the writing, not in the pages, not even once. She didn't even know her father's first name, it was as if they never existed at all.

She thought that perhaps this was her own way of keeping the sorrow away, of not feeling the pain of their loss. So that she wouldn't miss them. A way of protecting herself, protecting her wounded, lonely heart.

But since she was starting to recollect her childhood days, Shizuru guessed it was a good sign. It was only a matter of time before all her memories came back.

… _It's almost morning…_ Shizuru noticed. She could tell because it had gotten so much lighter in the room and she could see Natsuki's features almost perfectly now, there was barely any shadows on her face. _…I wonder if she realizes how perfect she is, inside and out…_ And she could also hear the birds starting to wake, could hear the faint chirping sounds coming from the large window.

It's been exactly one week since the attempt on Natsuki's life. And a very long one, especially for Shizuru.

Ever since that night, ever since she had found out that she could've possibly been on Earth, she barely slept.

In all honestly, at the beginning when she had regained consciousness, Shizuru thought she might've been hallucinating, perhaps even dreaming. That the hit on the head had made her see things, had made her lose touch of reality for a little while. That it was all a figment of her imagination, a figment of her overactive mind.

But once she had found the words in the book. Once she had read what _In the Darkness_ entailed, the thought instantly vanished, and some things started to make sense to her:

The sleepwalking,

the tiredness,

the voices she sometimes heard,

her being able to link minds with her captor, perhaps possess him, although she wasn't very certain of this because it had only happened one time.

For weeks she thought she was going crazy, thought that something was wrong in her head, but she wasn't. Now that she knew this, she knew she wasn't. She wasn't going insane. This was real, very real. This was really happening to her.

The book didn't give her much details on the technology for it was classified, military technology. Classified espionage technology that had been going horribly wrong on missions for many months, so it was never used again.

But the book did explain a few things.

The book explained that since the body didn't feel pain while being controlled, the possessed ended up dying because of the wounds they had incurred while _In the Dark_. Ah, but not only that, they also had found that if they disconnected suddenly, disconnected improperly, some of the possessors lost their mind, that they didn't come back. So, the technology was deemed as a failure, deemed _dangerous_ and was buried in the archives, never to be used or worked on again.

The book said that the technology was very limiting, because one could only gain control of the body while in 'deep state of rest' or 'deep sleep', which only gave the possessor control of the body for about an hour and a half, two hours at most each night. That's how it got its name, _In the Darkness_. Because it was mainly used at night, for that's when most people slept long enough to reach this deep state of rest.

The book also said that the technology had many flaws, that it was very _unpredictable_ and _unstable_ , and more so when there was a bond, a special connection between the possessor and the possessed. And since the technology was classified as dangerous, the military didn't research further into it, didn't explore further, didn't want to waste any more man hours or resources on the matter.

Controlling someone for two hours was not enough anyway. And not being able to communicate made spying even harder, for they couldn't engage in casual conversation with those in their surroundings or get valuable information out of them. And on top of that, they didn't know how long the effects would last, how long they'd be able to possess the body. The subjects always died, so they weren't able to find out.

So, they buried the technology and moved on to the next project. Simple as that.

… _They must've been desperate to use this on me, knowing its high rate of instability…_ Shizuru was right about that, about the desperate part. But it was the only thing that worked on her clever mind since she couldn't be persuaded, couldn't be turned to their side. They had no other options, had very limited resources. This was their only choice.

 _…And what do they mean by bond? What kind of bond? What could possibly bond me to him?..._ Those were some of the questions that the brunette had all week long.

She didn't know this young man, this Ichiro guy. He lived in another planet, billions and billions of miles away. They weren't lovers, weren't friends. And to her knowledge they weren't family or related. Had they been connected by blood somehow, she would've known, would've figured that out, she would've caught it in conversation somehow. She was sure they had done blood tests on her, had searched every inch of her anatomy, of her DNA in those two years they had held her captive.

Then, what?

What kind of bond could they possibly have?

What linked her to him?

It couldn't be feelings, she hated him,

deeply hated him for what he had done to her.

Then, what?

What was she missing? What was she not taking into consideration?

But unbeknownst to Shizuru, it had everything to do with feelings. What she was missing was _his feelings_ for her.

He felt very deeply for her, had somehow fallen deeply in love with her. That's what exposed him, that's what allowed her to have access to his body, to his thoughts, to his mind, even without the helmet. This was what connected her to him, strong feelings. Deep feelings.

Their mutual feelings didn't exactly align, for his was of love and hers was of hate. But it was the _deepness_ of it that connected them.

And that connection was one of the flaws of the technology, what made it so unpredictable. This was what allowed her to possess him even though he had been conscious at the time, wide awake. Its unexplored potential, what this technology could do, it was dangerous and endless.

And Shizuru, ever since she found out that her captors could possibly have access to her while in her sleep, she had stopped doing so. She didn't stop completely though, it was impossible not to sleep. The body really needed it to function at all. She just didn't allow herself to reach deep sleep just as she had read in the book, at least not in the nighttime.

Most of the night, she tried her best to stay awake. She'd quietly drink her tea and read, researched and kept notes while Natsuki slept soundly next to her. She was reading different types of books now, _botanical_ ones, even one about communicating in sign language. The purpose of this you'll find out soon enough.

And during the daytime, she slept with intervals. She'd sleep for two hours, three at most in the morning and then would wake up, and she'd sleep again the same amount of time in the afternoon. She doubted that they would try to control her during the daytime, they'd be totally exposed with too many people around. But she couldn't be too sure, so, she didn't sleep long enough.

It was very tiring, doing this. She was exhausted, so exhausted. But she didn't want to risk it, more so when the blunette was sleeping next to her. She wanted to keep her safe, wanted to make sure that nothing happened to her.

Sometimes, she wished she would've declined moving in with the blunette. It was risky, sleeping in the same room with her every night. And with this new information, she was now certain that, that night in Aries, her captor had tried to harm her, had tried to get rid of her, possibly because she was on the way of their plans. Because they could get caught.

And this led her to the next series of questions:

What exactly was their plan?

Why were they doing this?

What exactly did they want?

Shizuru could just not figure that part out.

She had her suspicions though, especially since she noticed that those people on Earth could've been exposed to extremely high levels of radiation.

She noticed this because of their eyes, because the younger the person was, the brighter the color of their eyes were. There was a very strange, unnatural glow in them. A genetic defect due to generation after generation of exposure to harmful chemicals.

But why wouldn't they just cross over? They had immediate access to Earl, right? All they had to do was open the portal and cross.

So many questions Shizuru had. So many questions.

Either way, she'd find out soon enough. She had a plan of her own, a plan that she would set into motion in two days' time since Natsuki will be in Aries for diplomatic reasons and she will not be joining her on that trip. She was going to try and figure out what it was that they wanted and was going to try and stop them on her own.

This was her fight, her battle and hers alone. Not Natsuki's, not Youko's. That's why she didn't share her memories of those days with them, because she didn't want to bring anyone else into this, bring harm to them.

Those bastards didn't do this to them, didn't torture them, play with their emotions, with their feelings and mind, experimented on them. All this was done to her.

 _Her_.

She wanted her revenge and she was not going to rest until she had succeeded, until that petty old man was no longer breathing.

… _It's a little risky, and there is a chance I may not come back, but I have to do this. I hope this works…_ And Shizuru allowed herself to finally close her eyes, _…If I want to spend my life with Natsuki, if I want to keep her safe, it has to work. I can't have this looming over me, this needs to stop now…_ allowed herself to fall asleep since she had about two hours until Natsuki's alarm went off.

And she had a surprise for Natsuki when she woke up, a surprise that had to do with an item she had found a little over two weeks ago in a white box.

 **Same time,**

 **Planet Earth**

"Could there be something wrong with the connection, father?" Ichiro anxiously asked, nervously scratching the side of his arm.

They were in the strategy room at the moment, and he was standing in front of a large screen, his bright, blue eyes eyeing the details on it. It didn't seem like anything was wrong with the brunette, her vitals seemed fine.

Then, why couldn't he connect?

Why didn't the little 'green light' that said the connection was stable ever come on?

He was anxious. Anxious because a whole week had passed and he had not been able to go _In the Dark_. And he was starting to become more and more restless with each passing night. He missed Deadly Beautiful, missed seeing her, missed the fact that even though he wasn't there, physically with her, he was still with her. It brought him relief, brought him piece of mind, stopped the ache of his heart.

"No, there's nothing wrong with the connection, my son…" Hazel eyes looked up at the screen as well. "It seems like she's not sleeping through the night. The connection is very faint throughout the daytime, though, it could be that some of her habits might've changed. All we can do is wait" Then, his hazel eyes shifted to a different screen, the one displaying the brunette's brain activity and memory progress. "Her memories are advancing fast though" He noticed that it had jumped to sixty five percent in only a week. It had stalled at forty percent for quite some time, so the sudden jump was alarming to him even though he didn't show it on his features.

She was remembering more and more. It could only mean that the neon-yellow serum was losing power, losing strength. And once that was gone, they would no longer have access to her. They were running out of time.

"Perhaps she no longer feels fear" Was Ichiro's thought. Which in a way, he was right; fear delayed memory progress, and once that was no longer present then the mind was free to explore, the mind was more at ease to open up.

And what Shizuru was feeling right now, it wasn't fear, it was the opposite. It was anger. The more she remembered about those days, the angrier she became.

"Perhaps, but we had anticipated for that" Was the thoughtful reply, remembering how the brunette had expressed no fear for the first seven months in captivity. The woman was strong, nothing scared her, at least not until the injections began, the ones that had her screaming every single night.

"How are you feeling these days, Ichiro?" He then asked his son, he hadn't used his name in such a long time. "Any nausea? Dizziness? Loss of appetite?" And then, cautiously added, "Blackouts?"

"No, father. I'm feeling fine…"

Hazel eyes curiously stared at blue ones for a moment. He didn't know whether to believe him or not. And after a long moment of silence, "If things keep going this way, we might have to go _in the dark_ during the daytime"

"I wouldn't advise that, father. If she's spotted, they would tell right away it's not her because of her eyes…" Yes, when _In the Darkness_ , her intense, Ruby eyes were no longer present. The color changed. They were replaced by his bright blue ones. Another item to add to the list of flaws in the technology.

"I know, let's hope it doesn't come to that, my son" The older of the two then walked over to the giant map on the table. "There is one place we have yet to explore, I'd like to try going there next when we are able to connect"

When he looked at the footage from their most recent possession, he noticed a strange looking building a distance away. It was large, white, and it looked like a fan.

"Have you had any luck with the particles, son?" The man then asked.

"No, it's a little puzzling. I'm still baffled by how they work…" And after some silence, he had a sudden thought, something suddenly came to him. A conversation from a very long time ago.

"Father, do you remember our first captive? The irrational man with the long white beard?"

The father looked at his son in the eyes, "Yes… He was a talker, alright" The man just wouldn't shut up. He really couldn't wait to release him and have that desert take his life.

"He said something about the powerful warriors that would come to his rescue… He called them something, do you remember what it was?"

And after much thought, "Ah, _Otome_ " he said the word aloud. "He called them Otomes, my son" And after he had said it, his lips curved upwards in realization. "Do you know what this word means, Ichiro?"

"It means female, maiden" Was the soft reply.

"Yes… And don't forget virgin" The man added with a grin, "female virgins, that's why the particles didn't work on our last subject, we didn't take that detail into consideration…" This was a breakthrough. "Good work, my son"

… _Deadly Beautiful has never been with a man before, she is still a virgin…_ Ichiro's cheeks tinted pink at the thought. _…When we're together again, when we've succeeded in crossing over, I could be her first, her one and only…_ Yea, right. Not even in your dreams, boy.

"Go, son. Ask around and put a list together. This is of outmost importance, we must give it a try"

"Ask around…" His father's voice brought Ichiro out of his very perverted thoughts, "You want me to ask the remaining women in the colony if they are virgins or not" he deadpanned. "Isn't that a little too invasive, father?" And it was embarrassing, he didn't want to do that. And he was sure that the little women that were left in the colony already had a partner, there probably weren't any virgins left. But he wasn't about to tell his father that, not right now, that would only anger him.

"No, it's not invasive. Not if it'll get us off this planet, not if it can help us take over the other world… Go, son, you're wasting time. We have much work to do"

 **Sometime later,**

 **Garderobe**

\- Beep – Beep – Beep – Beep -

Natsuki slowly detached herself from the brunette and moved her body to the left of the bed. Then, she reached for her nightstand, her palm gently silencing the alarm.

She did as she had been doing every single morning for the past week. She'd snuggle with the brunette for about five more minutes after the alarm went off. Then, she'd get up, raise to a sitting position, slowly stretched her arms and straitened her back, all the while letting out a soft yawn. And then, she'd kiss the sleeping brunette good morning on the cheek before leaving their bed.

She'd grab her bathrobe from the nearby chair and would walk over to the restroom, were the first thing she'd do is, well, she's human so she'd release her bladder. And then she'd walk over to the sink, she'd wash her hands and brush her teeth, and then neatly got rid of her clothes and hopped in the shower.

But this morning, it was a _little different_. The routine was somewhat off. She wasn't able to make it to the toilet this time around.

Once she had closed the door behind her and had walked to the middle of the large room, her Emerald eyes immediately caught sight of something written on the wide mirror. Written with what seemed to be red lipstick.

It stood out so much, especially since everything in this room was void of live colors, everything was white.

Natsuki walked over to the sink, her reflection in the mirror obstructed by the writing. "I know how much you hate surprises, so please don't be alarmed" She slowly read Shizuru's handwriting in her hoarse, morning voice.

"when you leave this room, I will be waiting right outside" She paused for a moment to cautiously look at the closed door, involuntarily swallowing as she did so, and then faced the mirror again and kept on reading,

"a-and I will be asking you a question. I hope that after you listen to what I have to say, your answer is yes" and then, "but you are allowed to say no, our relationship won't change and my feelings won't get hurt"

The blunette felt a knot in her throat, felt heat on her face. She felt complete nervousness, felt a sudden tightness in her chest.

Was Shizuru going to ask what she thought she's going to ask?

But wasn't it a little premature?

They're both not well yet. They said, well, more like _she herself_ had said, that they would wait. And she was the one who was going to propose marriage to her, not the other way around.

What was Shizuru thinking?

Was she out of her mind?

She wasn't expecting this, not this soon. This was a total surprise. And Shizuru was right about the first part, she really didn't like surprises.

Natsuki looked at the closed door for a long moment. And after taking a few deep breaths and gaining enough courage, she decided to walk over to it, to open it.

And once she had done that, she had found Shizuru waiting outside, just as the writing on the mirror had said.

She was on the floor, sitting _Seiza_ style. She was leaning forward a little, finishing lighting the last of the many candles surrounding her on the floor. There was a calmness about her, a warm, beautiful smile on her blushing face, and a small box on her left hand.

She was glowing, beautifully glowing, and Natsuki wasn't sure if this was because of the candles, or because of the morning light seeping in through the large windows, or if this was Shizuru's own glow, her own happiness radiating out of her body.

And when those unique Ruby eyes looked up and their eyes met,

" _Ohayo_ , Natsuki"

Natsuki nervously swallowed, unmoving from the door, " _O-… Ohayo_ , Shizuru" She softly replied to her.

Shizuru lovingly smiled at her, "Don't be nervous, ne?" she had to whisper to her, knowing that this was a big step, especially for someone like Natsuki.

If she was scared, if she answered no today, she wouldn't blame her, wouldn't be mad at her.

Shizuru brought her hand up, reaching out for her lover's hand, "Come sit with me…"

And Natsuki slowly took the necessary steps to get to her, to grab the offered hand. She lowered her body and sat _Seiza_ style in front of Shizuru, sitting inside the small circle of light with her.

" _Kannin na_ it's not a very romantic setting, but I've been wanting to do this for a very long time now, I couldn't wait any longer…" The brunette sincerely said,

"And I know this, not because some words written in a notebook said so, but because I remember… I remember that you're my greatest love, my greatest heartache. That you're my whole life, and that no one makes me feel the way you do" She paused for a moment, her thumb caressing the woman's fingers, and then continued,

"Today, I've decided to listen to my heart, my heart that is always full of thoughts of you…" Shizuru softly continued, "We have known each other for quite some time now, I've seen you grow into the marvelous woman you have become. And ever since I met you that afternoon right in this Academy, I was completely taken by you, you haven't left my thoughts since then" and then,

"You said something to me not too long ago, you said that you were really trying to change. And I believe you, you truly are… But I want Natsuki to understand one thing. I didn't push Natsuki throughout our relationship because I wanted her to change. I don't want her to change, I fell in love with her just the way she is… All I wanted was for her to realize one thing, that her feelings, _our feelings_ , are nothing to be ashamed of. That it is okay to hold hands when others are around, that it doesn't matter whether they are looking or not, it doesn't matter what they think or say. And you may not realize this, but every passing day, you're understanding this, you're showing affection, you're getting better, so much better"

Yes, this is true, the blunette no longer looked at her surroundings, looked for other people's reaction when showing affection to her, at least not _all_ the time.

"You've come such a long way, Natsuki, I'm very, very proud of you…" Shizuru's hand went for the woman's blushing cheek and caressed her there,

"And my memories are coming back to me every single day, so much faster than before. So, let's not wait any longer, let's get married and continue getting better, continue moving forward together" and after that,

"I… I believe this is the part where Natsuki should stand" she couldn't help and timidly smile at her as she bent on one knee and then helped the woman stand. Natsuki looked so innocent right now. She seemed like she was in the clouds, she was speechless, out of words.

"Natsuki…" Shizuru took a deep breath and then continued, "you are so much more than a lover, so much more than a best friend… you complete me, you are my very soul" She took out the gorgeous ring from its box, placed the box aside on the floor, and then reached out for the blunette's soft, left hand. She then looked her in the eyes again and said,

"Kruger, Natsuki, wielder of the Ice Silver Crystal, and Princess of Duran, I am happiest when I am by your side… You are the light of my eyes and the keeper of my heart, and I love you, I will always love you and protect you, come what may" and then, "A-Are… Are you willing to share the rest of your life with me?" And finally,

"Kruger, Natsuki, will you please marry me?"

 **\- 0 -**

* * *

 **Thanks for Reading!**

 **And Thanks for the Reviews/Comments**

 **To tell the truth, I didn't see Shizuru's proposal coming. Once it was written, I debated whether to erase it and just forget it ever happened or just use it. So I kept it because I think it shows progression on her part, and I also think that for the events of the next chapter to occur, it'd make more sense if I kept it.**

 **And her proposal was very simple, nothing grand or extravagant, which I think is fitting for her character based on what I've seen in Otome. She seems like a simple person.**

 **Also, FYI, we are down to the last two chapters guys! And then comes the epilogue.**

 **Some of you might think ending the story right now might be rushed, I know there are some areas that could still be explored in this world, but I think it's for the best that I end it. Everything is out in the open now, who the other people are, what happened to them, their true intentions, and Shizuru now knows about them and understands what's happening to her a little better. I don't want to prolong this story and turn it into a joke with random nonsense chapters, LOL. One must know when to end things.**

 **Anyway, I hope you guys enjoyed this fic. I really enjoyed the creative process of this one, it really made me think.**

 **As always, let me know your thoughts!**

 **Writing "For the love of ShizNat"**


	16. Chapter 16

**In the Darkness**

 **A Mai Otome ShizNat Story**

 **Chapter 16**

"Thank you for your promptness about this, I know it's very last minute…"

As Natsuki sat on her comfy chair, talking on the phone, Mai and Youko entered the room, gently closing the door behind them. They walked over to the large, brown couch with a tray in hand and made themselves comfortable there, quietly talking while preparing their morning tea.

Emerald eyes never left sight of the lively city as she talked, " _Hai_ , three p.m. is perfect" and then, " _Arigato…_ " she swirled her chair around. She didn't do so completely but midway, partly facing the two women, " _Hai_ , we'll be waiting" and after four seconds of silence she gently hung up the phone.

She let out a soft sigh and stayed there for a few seconds, sitting quietly, staring at the view of the city again. She was going over and over in her head the events of this morning, of what had happened just two hours ago in her quarters. Going over and over in her head Shizuru's proposal, every single one of her words.

… _How long was this on her mind?…_ She wondered.

She still couldn't believe it, couldn't believe that Shizuru had done that, had asked for her hand in marriage.

And she still couldn't believe what she had said to the brunette after hearing that heartfelt declaration. Couldn't erase Shizuru's expression from her mind. She herself, couldn't believe she had said that, couldn't believe the words that had slipped from her mouth after that long moment of staring and silence.

What was she thinking?

Had she gone insane?

"I smell diamonds…"

That naughty voice pushed Natsuki out of her thoughts. She was now facing the incoming Column's direction.

"Oh, good, you're finally here" Natsuki softly let out. She had been so deep in thought that she didn't hear what Nao had said.

But Mai, on the other hand, raised a curious, bushy brow, for Nao was not known to throw empty jabs at someone. Her words always had some truth in it, there was always a meaning behind them.

Natsuki continued, "Before we start our meeting, I'd like to ask you-"

"Natsuki, could you wait a moment?" Mai interrupted the Headmistress mid-sentence, "What do you mean you smell diamonds?" She then asked the youngest occupant in the room. She had joined them on the couch and was now sitting next to her with both of her feet on the coffee table.

And as Youko tapped on Nao's leg, silently scolding her for her very bad manners,

"Oh, haven't you heard? Word around Garderobe is someone is _tying the knot_ " Nao said in her typical teasing voice, crossing a leg over the other as her feet were now touching the ground.

" _N-Nani?_ " And Natsuki's heart stopped, "H-How?!" her Emerald eyes widened, and her face, her beautiful face turned twenty different shades of red in under five seconds.

There was no doubt about it, not one. Someone had to be spying on her, someone had to be! There was just no way, no way someone could've found out about this already. It just happened!

She was going to have to check her office, her quarters, the whole damn Academy and see if there were hidden cameras somewhere. It just didn't make sense to her how things spread in this place so soon.

"Natsuki, what is Nao talking about" The way Mai had said this, so fast and with such a commanding tone, it didn't sound like a question at all.

By the way Natsuki had reacted, her nervousness, her reddened face, it could only mean that Nao was talking about her. And to her knowledge, Natsuki wasn't going to ask Shizuru the marriage question, not yet. She was sure the blunette would share this news with her before actually doing it.

"Go on, _Gakuenchou_ , tell us how she bent on one knee" Nao then smirked at the Headmistresses' dumbfounded expression.

Nao was still not over what Shizuru had said to her a week ago. Natsuki was still paying dearly for this. Every day she was. Nao always found a way to aggravate her.

And no, the news wasn't actually out there. The news of the proposal hadn't spread, not yet at least.

Late last night, when she was about to sneak out of Garderobe to meet up with her gang members, she had briefly crossed paths with Shizuru.

The woman had just stepped out of her old bedroom at around three a.m. with a bunch of candles on her hands. They didn't really exchange words besides the normal pleasantries. Okay, and maybe a little teasing from Shizuru, especially since Nao was leaving Garderobe at such a time. But the moment she saw all those candles, along with a very small box, she knew. She knew that Shizuru was going to pop _the question_ early morning. It was so obvious.

"W-Wait a minute, she proposed to you?!" Mai eagerly asked the frozen blunette. This was certainly a huge surprise, a huge turn of events.

She then turned to Nao since she was getting no answers from the woman, "Did Shizuru propose to her?!"

" _Ara, Ara~_ Candles and everything…" Was Nao's witty reply. "I bet it was very romantic~"

And Natsuki stood up so fast and glared at the redhead, her eyes involuntarily twitching and hands turning to tight fists.

Was she ever going to get any privacy in this place?

Why was her business always out in the open?

Can't she have a freaking break?!

Natsuki wanted to scream.

"Go on, _Gakuenchou_ , show us the tiny white rock" Nao then teasingly continued, a hand covering her lips, "Or did you have the courage to decline Shizuru-san's marriage proposal?" and after a brief pause, and a lot more silence, "Oh my, things are going to get so interesting around here~"

Youko and Mai turned to face Natsuki's direction, waiting for her to do something, to say something. To deny this.

But when nothing came,

"Natsuki…" Mai warily began, "You didn't actually-"

"Do you think me an idiot!?" Natsuki yelled at her friend, aggravation at its highest point. "Of course not!" She then crossed her arms and looked away, blushing and pouting, the diamond ring, and no, it's not a tiny, white rock, now in view. Its brightness blinding.

Did they actually think she would do that to Shizuru? Decline her proposal after such a loving and heartwarming declaration?

No way.

No way!

She loved her, loved that woman with all her heart. There was no way she was going to say no to her, no matter how frightening the topic was.

" _Omedeto_ on your engagement, Natsuki" Youko softly smiled, congratulating the blunette.

And Mai, she jumped in pure enthusiasm. She immediately hugged Nao who could only cringed from the contact.

"I said I would marry her, b-but- but under one condition" Natsuki then timidly added, muttered. She was still lightly blushing and looking away.

And all eyes were on her again, even Nao's curious ones.

Natsuki giving conditions to Shizuru? That was a first.

"Natsuki, what on Earl did you do…" Mai let out in horror, fearing the worst.

And Natsuki swallowed, shyly saying, "I… I said that we had to get married today, that I didn't wish to wait"

Once she had heard Shizuru's proposal, had heard Shizuru's thoughts that came straight from her heart, she just didn't want to wait anymore.

They had been dating for almost four years, had known each other for over a decade now. And for most of that decade, she had loved her. It was mostly in silence, but she had loved her. She had loved her for so, so long. It might've sounded crazy, and perhaps she was rushing this, but she wanted to marry her right away, wanted to start marriage life with her right away. She no longer wished to wait.

There was silence in the room for a long, long while. Had you dropped a pin, you could hear it loud and clear once it had hit the floor.

At least until,

"SAY WHAT?! COME AGAIN?!" Mai's heart couldn't take so many ups and downs in under five minutes. She felt like she was on an emotional rollercoaster ride, she felt like she was about to pass out.

"Did you hear that?" Mai then asked Youko, wanting to make sure she had heard the woman right. "Did she really say that?"

She could only imagine Shizuru's expression when she heard this herself. The woman was probably mute, speechless, deaf, and blind for a good minute.

And yes, Shizuru was. This had totally caught her by surprise.

Youko smilingly nodded, "You heard right, Mai-san. Looks like there'll be a wedding today"

"Huh, I honestly didn't think you had it in you" Nao, on the other hand, let out, totally amused. "Why the rush though? It's not like her parents are pointing a gun to your head for defiling her every night…" And then, " _Ara, Ara~_ Don't tell me you're afraid she might change her mind and give the ring to one of those cute Pearls?"

Shizuru had a lot of fangirls in the Pearl year this year. _A lot_. Every year they seem to multiply somehow.

Natsuki narrowed her eyes at the young Column. _…One of these days, I'm going to make her eat her words…_ Maybe it was time to send her on a very long mission. A long mission to somewhere extremely secluded and extremely cold. That would teach her to bite her tongue, to remind her who she was talking to.

Natsuki brought a hand to her lips, clearing her throat. Her face was now back to its natural color, blush and shyness gone. Then, she slowly walked towards their direction.

"Before I got interrupted," Her Emerald eyes narrowed at Mai. Hadn't she interrupted her they would've found out about her engagement in a different way. She was going to tell them herself. "I was going to ask if you didn't mind being our witnesses. Shizuru and I would really appreciate your presence" then, softly added, "The ceremony will be in the Moon Garden at three"

Originally, since it was such a sudden decision, they were just going to head to Wind Bloom's city hall and get married there. Just sign the papers and they would officially be married. But after the scent of Jasmines hit Natsuki's senses, she suggested to have it in the Moon Garden, and that she would have the minister come to them. That's who she was talking to earlier, he had agreed to stop by at three.

And all three women agreed about being their witness.

There was a soft nod from Youko, an excited thumbs-up from Mai, and a shrug from Nao.

Once Natsuki got there, she joined them by sitting on the adjacent couch. "We've already called Haruka-san, she said she can make it as well"

When they had called Haruka, the woman seemed to be in shock at first, and then barked at them for not following etiquette about these things. It was too sudden, she had to change her imaginary plans around. But she said she wouldn't miss it. She said she'd be there for Bubuzuke.

Natsuki gracefully crossed one leg over the other, "And we talked to my father… Unfortunately he can't make it since it's a very long trip from Duran, but he gave us his blessing" a warm smile grazed her lips thinking of the conversation they had had with him on the phone.

The man had congratulated them, had given them some fatherly advice about marriage and responsibility. Had also asked for many grandchildren, and for frequent visits to Duran. To which Shizuru happily complied.

And as Mai sat next to her on the couch, grabbing her hand to admire the beautiful ring adorning her finger, she continued,

"It's very sudden, so we are thinking of having the ceremony today, and then after I come back from Aries, we will plan for something bigger and formal. We will plan a reception and invite everyone, family and friends"

"Sounds good!" Mai was so excited for her friend she was about to cry a river of joy. "I can't believe this is really happening. I'm so happy for you, Natsuki!" And she hugged her so, so tightly, "Really, _omedeto_ " and after she had let her go, she asked, "What did Shizuru-san think of the ring?"

"I didn't know she was going to do this. I didn't have it with me"

Did Mai forget that it was Shizuru who proposed? The ring was still locked in the safe, it was still right here, in her office.

"I'll give it to her in the ceremony" The blunette continued.

"What about the honeymoon? You will have a honeymoon, right?"

Mai was asking way too many questions and Natsuki didn't have answers. They had just gotten engaged, had just decided to get married today. They didn't have a chance to talk about all of this, there was no plan, nothing concrete, not yet.

"You two haven't gone to the cabin in a while…" Youko spoke her mind, "Why don't you spend tonight there? You can come back before you head out to Aries… Spend some alone time"

Natsuki softly nodded, liking that idea. She knew that Shizuru would agree with this as well. She really loved it there. And not too long ago she had asked her when they would return. They haven't gone back since that weekend, the weekend they had made love for the first time in over two years. The weekend that she discovered that Shizuru still held feelings for her, despite the amnesia.

"Can you handle Garderobe on your own until we come back, Youko?" The blunette asked, and she immediately received a nod from the woman as a response.

"Alright" Then, her features became serious as she reached forward to pour warm tea into her teacup. It was time to talk business, to get serious. The real purpose of today's meeting.

"Nao, were you able to find out anything about the four unidentified bodies the authorities found in the desert? Do you know how they disposed of them?"

"Since no one claimed them, and they couldn't be I.D.'ed or returned to their families, they ended up cremating them" Nao inspected her nails as she nonchalantly said this.

"I see…" Was the husky, thoughtful reply, "I was hoping they would've buried them…"

Had the authorities kept the bodies, buried them, Garderobe could've claimed them and ran tests on what was left of them. It's been many years since the police had found them, but there was still viable DNA there. DNA that could tell them, give them an idea where they were from.

"Youko?" Natsuki then eyed the woman, wordlessly asking her what she had found.

"The autopsy reports didn't show any drugs or chemicals present in his blood" The woman calmly replied, referring to the man who had committed suicide in the mental institution after he had recovered his memories. "If he or Shizuru-san were given a drug of some kind, then it is undetectable, untraceable…" adding, "I ran extensive tests on her the night she returned, her blood tests, toxicology and chemical tests came back negative, Natsuki"

The blunette let out a groan, a hand now rubbing her eyes in frustration. "Can anything explain the similarities in their symptoms, then? If a drug didn't do this to them, then what did?" And finally, "What did they do to her, Youko?" She was having a hard time processing this, the similarities this man and Shizuru had.

The amnesia,

the sleepwalking,

the screaming and the nightmares,

And now, let's add to the list the fact that Shizuru wasn't sleeping.

Oh yes, Natsuki was well aware that Shizuru wasn't sleeping. She was aware of her change in habits.

She had awoken a few times in the middle of the night and had found her reading. After she had caught her doing this two nights in a row, she had asked her if she just wasn't comfortable in her new bed, if she wanted to switch the mattress with her old one. But Shizuru had said that she just wasn't tired or sleepy yet, and it had been like, four a.m. already.

Natsuki didn't believe that, more so when she could clearly see how tired Shizuru was.

She couldn't understand why Shizuru had opted not to sleep. Why she was doing this. Wondered if it was a psychological thing.

So, one night as they got ready for bed, she had asked her if she was afraid that she would have nightmares. But Shizuru had said no, that the nightmares had stopped. And she believed her when she said that. She could tell she was being sincere.

Then, what was it?

Why was Shizuru not sleeping?

She wished she could get it out of her somehow, make her open up to her somehow. She was hoping that by now Shizuru would've talked to them, told them what she's been through. She's been back for almost three months now, she knew that Shizuru remembered, if not all, at least something, she just knew it. It would be easier for them to figure this whole thing out had Shizuru just talked to them, shared something with them…

The only thing missing from the list of similarities with that man was the voices. It didn't seem like Shizuru was hearing voices yet. At least not to her knowledge.

"I don't know what to say, Natsuki" Youko sincerely answered. "In all honesty, I'm as puzzled as you are"

And Natsuki pursed her lips, her hand still covering her closed eyes. She felt so helpless. "This is a nightmare" She could only let out.

"Shizuru-san is nothing like that man, Natsuki" That, was Mai, trying to console her friend. "She is strong, and she is improving so much" She grabbed Natsuki's fisted hand, "There might be similarities between them, but it doesn't mean she'll end up like him. She's nothing like him"

Natsuki nodded once, her way of showing that she was listening.

"And I doubt she'll try to murder you in your sleep" Nao casually chimed in, reminding Natsuki of the horrible things that man had done to his wife and kids. "We would've found you dead already, that woman doesn't miss"

And all Natsuki could think of right now was what Shizuru had said to her a little while ago. She wondered if it counted that Shizuru had already murdered her probably a million times in her nightmares.

"Nao" Youko couldn't help and groan because of this. Because of Nao's insensitiveness towards the topic.

"You're not helping!" And Mai, in turn, hissed at her, reprimanded her.

And after a moment of complete silence,

"Alright, I declare this meeting adjourned, we'll continue this another day" Mai said as she stood, "Today's a happy day, Natsuki's getting married!" and tried to cheer up the gloomy inhabitants in the room. "Come on, Natsuki" She quickly grabbed mentioned woman by the arm,

"Oi, be careful!" And then, "Where are we going?"

"To your quarters. Let's search your closet and find you something white to wear"

And with those words said, Natsuki found herself being excitedly dragged out of the room by her energetic friend.

 **Meanwhile…**

And while this was happening, Shizuru was in her old bedroom, her opened diary in hand. She was sitting in her long, sofa chair by the window, writing some notes in neat, cursive letters.

She had already picked out what to wear for the ceremony, she had neatly placed it on the bed.

Since it was still warm for early fall, she picked out a white, knee length, flowy dress, together with white heels. It was the same dress she wore the day they had gone to the cabin. It was the only white dress she owned, but it would do just fine since it was a very small, very intimate ceremony.

"In the Darkness, find the source…" Shizuru read aloud the words she had written down.

She had heard this sentence before, had remembered it before, but she didn't think much about it until it came to her again today.

"Find the source…" Kyoto-ben whispered again, "The source" repeated absentmindedly.

"Source of what?" Shizuru thought aloud. "Power?"

Ruby eyes scanned her notes. She had a lot of random words there. Words that came to her from time to time from her captive days. Words she had picked up while being tortured.

Her Ruby eyes settled on one of the words, "Particles…" and then, translated it to, "Nanomachines" that's when she guessed, "Perhaps they're looking for what powers the nanomachines? What helps an Otome transform into her Robe?"

But what powers the Nanomachines is the Gemstone, and she knows that they already know this, she had caught it in conversation once. That's why they removed the Gemstone from her ear, that's why they removed the Nanomachines from her system.

"Perhaps they're looking for the source of the Gem's power…" She had been so far away from the source, billions and billions and billions of miles away, that she couldn't transform into her Robe.

They must've noticed it, must've noticed that they needed something more, because she was equipped in her Robe before the darkness pulled her in and she could no longer do that afterwards.

"The source of the Gem's power…" Yes, and the source of the Gem's power was the _Shinso_ , " _Ara~_ They're looking for Himeno Fumi-san"

That's what they're looking for. The powerful Himeno Fumi-san. She is the _Shinso_ , the source of their power. She is what powers up their Gem, what enables them to transform into powerful, deadly warriors.

"What is the purpose of this? Why are they looking for this?" Were the questions on her mind. "What do they need this for?"

Shizuru then sighed, closing her diary. Things were getting so complicated now.

She tilted her head to the left, her Ruby eyes eyeing her closed closet. In the closet, she had a few items she was hiding, keeping secret. Items that had to do with her plans of going _In the Dark_.

Shizuru realized that, the hit on the head had made her lose consciousness for a little while. It had helped unlock something in her mind, which made her possess Ichiro that night somehow.

She was going to try and do that again, try and reach that level of unconsciousness with the help of medicinal herbs. That's why she was reading botanical books, hoping to find a way, a safe way to reach that level without having to hit her head again. If she could help her muscles relax, take something that could help her pass out for a little while, she was sure she could possess him again. She was sure of it.

She had thought about using anesthesia at first, but anesthesia was too dangerous, too strong. If she took that, she might not feel pain, her body will be completely numb, she might not wake up. And she needed to feel pain, she needed to wake up. She needed to come back to Natsuki at all cost.

In her closet, she had all her books, the ones that were helping with her research. She also had a small defibrillator. She had sneaked the defibrillator out of the infirmary the other night. She was going to strap it to her chest, leave it on a timer setting so it could shock her back to Earl after a certain time. She was going to allow herself three hours at most to go in, find out what she can, get the job done and get out.

If three hours wasn't enough, she could try and go in again on another day. But she was hoping to settle this in one possession. The more she did this, the higher the risk, the higher the probability that her mind might not come back.

Ruby eyes then faced the bed's direction, settled on her white dress. _…Natsuki…_ She couldn't help and feel anxious now, knowing the risks, knowing all that she could lose if something went wrong.

She let out a shaky breath and closed her eyes, hugging her knees tightly against her chest. Trying to calm her nervousness, her anxiety, trying to calm the fast beat of her aching heart.

Today was supposed to be her wedding day. Today was supposed to be a happy day. She shouldn't be thinking about this. She needed these negative thoughts to go away.

" _Hi, Miracle"_

Shizuru stopped breathing for a moment and raised her head.

She had heard a voice in her head. She recognized that voice. It was _his voice_.

Shizuru hadn't realized it yet, but whenever she was anxious, she could hear him. Could hear whatever he said.

" _Don't be afraid, I won't hurt you, I'm here to help you"_

She heard him say, her hands turning into fists,

" _My name is Ichiro, it's very nice to meet you…"_

And after that, she could no longer hear him, the voice was gone. Anger had trumped anxiety, and since she was no longer anxious the connection was lost.

Not too long after that, Shizuru had a visitor, or, well, several visitors, so she ended up having a very busy morning.

Arika had stopped by to see her first, to ask her if it was true what she had heard, that she and the _Gakuenchou_ were getting married today.

Shizuru had told her yes, and had asked her to please keep it quiet, that they didn't want the whole school to show up at the Moon Garden to watch their nuptial. That the ceremony would be intimate, just a few guests. And told her she was more than welcomed to join them on their happy day.

Then, not too long after that, Mai had stopped by to chat with her and see if she needed any help. Natsuki had mentioned that Shizuru still had most of her clothes in her old bedroom, that she hadn't completely settled into her quarters yet, so that she'd probably find Shizuru there, and she did.

Youko had stopped by some time later to congratulate her on the engagement and the fast approaching wedding.

And Haruka and Yukino had joined them not too long after that.

The seven of them, subtracting Arika and adding Nao, had lunch together by the garden, telling jokes and stories before parting ways to get ready for the ceremony.

And then, in the blink of an eye, the time came.

Three o clock came around and both girls were in the Moon Garden clothed in simple yet beautiful white dresses, a crown of white Jasmines adorning their heads, a light blush on their cheeks, and loving smiles on their lips.

They voiced a few affectionate sentences to one another while holding hands, said, "I do", slipped their wedding rings on the other's ring finger, and sweetly kissed in front of the minister and close friends.

And then, to finalize the ceremony, signed the marriage certificate with their new last names, Kruger-Viola. They were now officially married, they were now wife and wife.

It was a simple wedding, a simple ceremony, but it was perfect for them. They wouldn't have pictured it any other way.

They married in the place where they had first met, where they had first kissed, where their love came to bloom, where they had confessed their feelings for one another, and now where their new life began. They married at the perfect spot.

After the ceremony, the couple said goodbye to their friends, mounting the vintage motorcycle with helmets that had 'Just Married' written in the back of them. Their friends eagerly waived goodbye to them and cheered for them as they drove out of Garderobe still dressed in white. Mai was crying the whole time.

The newlyweds stopped by the local supermarket before reaching the cabin. Purchased the most expensive bottle of champagne the place had, along with some groceries to make tonight's dinner and tomorrow's breakfast and lunch.

And when they reached their final destination a little after seven, the moment the door had closed behind them, the bags of groceries dropped to the floor. Hands immediately reached for skin and lips desperately locked, moans and gasps escaping their throats.

They hastily made their way to the bed were clothes quickly came off. Expressing through kisses, expressing through touch the love, adoration and devotion they felt. Consummating their marriage and professing everlasting love through the act.

"I can't believe you're now a Kruger" Natsuki said to her wife minutes after they had finished making love. "Kruger-Viola, Shizuru… It sounds really nice"

"It does, doesn't it?" Shizuru smiled, her hand caressing the woman's cheek. She was still on top of the blunette, staring at those Emerald eyes she adored.

"I love you, Kruger-Viola, Natsuki" She leaned down and sweetly captured her wife's soft lips.

And before things got heated again, before it got to the point of no return, she parted their kiss, saying, "Let's make a toast"

And when Natsuki nodded, she left the bed, not bothering to cover her naked body when she left.

And Natsuki, she used her elbows to prop herself upwards a little, and shamelessly watched with raised brows and blushing cheeks as Shizuru walked way. She watched everything the woman did, every single movement that perfect, naked body of hers made.

About a minute later, after Shizuru had put the bags of groceries in the refrigerator, she returned to the bedroom area with two glasses in hand and the bottle of champagne.

" _Ara~_ , there's some drool on Natsuki's face" Shizuru teased once she had joined her wife on the bed. Natsuki was still openly staring at her.

"H-Huh?" And Natsuki blushed, quickly facing to the side, a hand instantly going for her lips to wipe the drool off her face.

" _Fufu_ , just kidding~" Kyoto-ben happily sing-sang.

" _Mou_ , Shizuru!" And the blunette groaned, narrowing her eyes at her wife.

" _Kannin na_ , love, I couldn't resist" And Shizuru finished that apology with a short peck on her cheek.

She handed the blunette the two glasses so that she could open the bottle and pour the champagne for them. And once she had done that, she put the bottle aside on the nearby table.

"What should we toast for?" Came the husky question.

"To us" Was the soft answer. "To you and me. To a lifetime of happiness together"

This made Natsuki smile, she raised her glass, "To us"

And _the mood_ came again, the newlyweds made love again, manifested by the giggles and kisses, by the whispers of love and the effects of the champagne.

 **A Few Hours Later,**

 **Planet Earth**

"Is this chemical safe?" Ryo, Miracles father, worriedly asked the young man. He wanted no harm to come to his little girl, so he was full of questions.

They were in the lab. The little girl was sitting on a bed, holding her father's hand tightly and watching him talk.

This lab, it looked like a scary place to her. There were so many weird things, so many strange looking machinery. And this Ichiro man, his aura wasn't as nice as before. She didn't trust him. He seemed nice, he didn't seem that bad, but there was something wicked about him. She could feel it.

"What will this do to her?" Ryo then asked.

And Ichiro, he didn't have an accurate answer to the man's question, "I'm hoping to see a spike in her vitals… a positive reaction"

"You're hoping?" Ryo repeated, "You have no idea what this will do to her? What if this kills her?"

"It won't" Was the immediate answer. "We've tried it on others and it didn't harm them"

Ryo sighed and then stared at his daughter's innocent, pink eyes.

"This could be good for her…" Ichiro whispered to the man. He then stared over to his father's direction, he was a distance away, silently working on something.

"If this works" He continued, "She could cross to the other side, unharmed"

"She wont die, like the others in the past?"

"No, she won't…" Ichiro then wavered, "I mean, it's not certain. I'm speaking in hypotheticals" And then, added, "But there's a very good chance she will survive"

Ryo stared at his daughter again. He was torn with this decision, he didn't know what to do. He just wanted what was best for her.

And Ichiro, he just wanted the man to approve this, because with his permission or not, his father would do what he wanted. His father would kill Ryo if necessary to get his hands on the little girl.

"Okay…" Ryo answered,

And Ichiro sighed in relief.

"Son, we have a stable connection"

Upon hearing this, Ichiro's heart jumped in excitement. It's as if his prayers had been answered, he'd get to see Deadly Beautiful tonight. _…At last!..._

"I'll be right there, father!" He couldn't say this fast enough, excitedly enough. He hurried and prepared the injection with the particles. The sooner he was done with this, the faster he could see his lovely and very beautiful crimson eyed brunette.

"This won't hurt, please stay still" He said to the little girl once the injection was ready. And then he wet a white cotton strip with rubbing alcohol and gently rubbed it on her arm.

Seconds later, the needle went in, and seconds after that, he slowly pushed the bright, red liquid into her bloodstream.

After he was done, he immediately placed the empty syringe on the table and ran towards the bed where the helmet waited for him.

"Father, please monitor her, I'm going in before the connection is lost"

"Yes, son" The father acknowledged, walking towards the little girl. "Remember, go to the structure we talked about. When you've arrived, let me know"

"Yes, father" Ichiro secured the helmet on his head and then lay down on the comfortable yet cold bed. His fingers went for the little button on the side and pressed it, turning it on.

The helmet did its job, it awakened specific parts of his brain, made it release certain toxins that would allow him to achieve a level of unconsciousness and yet he could stay lucid, in control of his body and actions.

He closed his eyes and felt himself leave. Saw the bright lights that would lead him to the brunette's body, to Deadly Beautiful's mind.

And once he was there, he slowly opened his eyes and waited a few seconds for his sight to adjust. And once it had adjusted he wasn't pleased by the sight at all.

That woman, that cobalt haired woman was sleeping with his beautiful brunette again. That woman was always in his way. He could clearly see her, could clearly see her sleeping face. Her face was always so close to the brunette's.

Always.

He commanded the brunette to slowly raise. And once she had done so, he realized that they were at that place again, the place in the woods.

He took in his surroundings, saw the nearly empty bottle of champagne on the nearby table, along with two glasses that were still half full.

… _Could they be celebrating something?..._

He then saw the white dresses on the nearby chair, along with a bouquet of white flowers.

And then, his sight fell upon the helmets, and he had to command the brunette to tilt her head a little so he could read what it said.

… _No…_

It said 'just married'

… _NO!..._

He looked down at her delicate hands. There was a ring there, a gorgeous sapphire ring there. And then he looked at the other woman's hands, and she was wearing a ring as well.

… _This can't be happening…_

And then he looked at the sleeping blunette's face again.

… _I hate you…_

He really did.

… _I hate you! I wish you were dead!…_

He really, really did.

Jealousy, anger, took over. He was slowly losing control, all rational thoughts gone.

He gently left the bed, making sure not to wake the blunette. Then, slowly walked over to the kitchen, and once he had gotten there, he quietly opened a few drawers until he had found what he was looking for.

He then slowly walked back to the bedroom area.

Slowly made his way to the bed.

He slowly straddled the blunette's hips, and then, _and then_ , the sharp knife made its way to the blunette's neck.

 **Sametime,**

 **Cabin**

"Shizuru, not again… I'm really exhausted" Natsuki sleepily let out, suddenly awakening when feeling her wife's weight on her.

And then, she felt something else, felt something metallic, something cold. Felt something sharp on her neck, digging, cutting through her skin.

She gasped in pain, her Emerald eyes suddenly opening.

She was wide awake now.

Wide awake.

She couldn't move, not an inch, if she did she was as good as dead.

"S-Shizuru… What are you doing?" Her lips trembled as she looked at Shizuru's expressionless face hovering above her. Her face that was void of emotion, of feeling.

And then she noticed that her eyes weren't hers. Her beautiful, Ruby eyes were replaced by bright, blue ones.

How?

How could this be?

She swallowed, remaining totally still, not moving a single muscle.

She cringed, feeling the knife digging slowly, digging deeper.

And then, it suddenly came to her. Something the brunette had told her in this very cabin a few weeks ago:

" _Everything is a mess in my head, Natsuki…_ _Sometimes I feel as if there's someone else in there"_

Shizuru had said to her that night.

And then, two days later, in the Healing Chamber:

" _I… I think they're watching"_

" _W… Who? Who's watching?"_

" _I don't know. I-I'm scared, Natsuki"_

And the night she had asked Shizuru to move in with her, Shizuru had made her promise something, something so improbable that she didn't give it much thought and conceded with her. The idea, the thought, was crazy. Bizarre:

 _"If my nightmares come true, if I try to harm you in anyway, promise me you won't hesitate... Promise me you will prevent me from hurting you, even if it means ending my life"_

" _Shizuru…"_

" _Promise me, Natsuki… Please"_

"… _Okay, I promise"_

The signs weren't very subtle, but they were there. They were.

… _I should've noticed…_ A tear escaped her Emerald eyes, _…Gomen, Shizuru. I have failed you…_ and she closed them, completely surrendering, waiting for the knife to take her life.

That's when she felt something land on her face. Something moist, something wet.

So, she slowly opened her eyes again.

And that face that was void of emotion had tears on them.

There were tears on them.

Shizuru was in there somewhere.

And it made Natsuki realize, that whatever had taken control of her, she was fighting it, she was trying to fight it. Otherwise, by now, she would've been dead. She was certain of this.

"W-Who are you?" After a moment, Natsuki asked, her hand slowly reaching for the nightstand to open the top drawer.

"W-What do you want?" And when she opened the drawer, she felt her way to her hand gun.

Once she had reached it, once her fingers had felt it, had surrounded it, she swallowed yet again. This movement causing the blade to dig a little deeper into her neck, so she cringed slightly from the pain.

She licked her dry, trembling lips and slowly brought the gun to view. Her hands shaking, terribly shaking. She never thought she'd be pointing this gun on the woman she loved.

"Why are you doing this?" She unlocked the safety lock with her thumb,

\- Click -

hearing the click sound.

Then, she brought the gun to the brunette's face, right between the eyes.

"I-I don't want to do this" She then whispered, "P-Please, I beg of you, please let her go…"

If she was going to die tonight, if this was her fate, she couldn't leave Shizuru like this, to have someone controlling her like this. She'd rather kill her first and then take her own life afterwards.

She wasn't going to leave Shizuru like this.

She couldn't.

She wouldn't.

Never.

"I love you, Shizuru..." She whispered to her, fresh tears escaping her, "I will always love you" And then, "I'm sorry" And her final whisper to her, "Don't be scared, we'll be together soon… I promise"

She was going to ride this as long as she could. Last as long as she could. She was losing a lot of blood, and fast. And she was feeling light headed, so, so light headed. She wasn't sure how much longer she would last.

 **Same time,**

 **Planet Earth**

"This is truly remarkable" The father whispered in awe, watching as all the little girl's stats raised one by one.

The curious particles, they worked on her, they really worked! Radiation levels were going down. Her vitals were healthier, improving by the second, her heart and lungs were stronger.

"Papa"

And she had found her voice!

Ryo could hear her voice!

"This is a miracle!" Ryo reached out to his daughter and hugged her tightly. "I'm so glad" And when he let her go, his eyes caught sight of something. "Um..." Something very interesting was happening on the screen behind them.

"General, sir" Ryo cautiously let out, "Is Ichiro-kun supposed to be doing that?" It looked like the young man was about to kill a beautiful woman.

And the father left his eyes from the screen with the girl's vitals to look at the large one behind them.

His eyes widened, it took him a moment to react, "Son… Son. Son, stop!" And he immediately ran to his side, ridding him off the helmet right away.

 **Back at the Cabin**

Had Shizuru not dropped the knife and had lifelessly fallen on her, Natsuki would've pulled the trigger.

In a few more seconds she really would've.

She was just about to lose consciousness and could barely keep her eyes open. Everything was starting to become blurry, to spin in the room. She had lost a lot of blood. Had she passed out like that she would've died. Bleed to death.

"Shizuru!" The blunette quickly raised and lay Shizuru on the bed, lay her on her back.

She quickly brought a hand to her own neck to stop the bleeding.

And then hastily opened Shizuru's eyes for her, inspecting her, only to find that they were no longer blue or red. They were black, pitch black.

Black as coal,

black as night.

Her ear immediately went for chest, for her heart, only to find that it was pounding strong, pounding very, very fast.

"What the hell is happening" Natsuki let out in panic, her heart and mind trying to make some sense of the situation, of what she had just discovered.

This must be the reason Shizuru had stopped sleeping in the night.

Because she realized that someone could control her in her sleep.

"Shizuru, come back to me" She gently patted the woman's cheek,

"Can you hear me?" She said to her,

"Wake up"

Natsuki had a very bad feeling about this.

 **\- 0 -**

* * *

 **Thanks for Reading!**

 **And thanks for the Reviews/ Comments**

 **Did I do a good job at fooling anyone in the beginning? LOL**

 **I blame the night on the champagne, just saying.**

 **Also, I needed something significant to make Ichiro snap the way he did.**

 **Okay! One more chapter to go! Chapter 17 is the Final Chapter. Then comes a short Epilogue.**

 **As always, let me know your thoughts!**

" **For the love of ShizNat"**


	17. Chapter 17

**In the Darkness**

 **A Mai Otome ShizNat Story**

 **The Final Chapter**

"Ichiro, what is the meaning of this?!" The father yelled at his son in rage, in pure anger, hastily removing the helmet from his head and tossing it on the ground. "I ordered you not to go anywhere near that woman! I told you to keep feelings out of this! Why didn't you listen to me?!"

He then quickly turned his head, faced away from his son who was now quietly, slowly raising to a sitting position on the bed.

His hazel eyes looked up, they went for the large screen, making sure the brunette's vitals were intact, that she was fine, "What have you done, Ichiro…" but the screen told him otherwise. The screen, it told him that the brunette was dead, her vitals had gone blank, had all formed a straight line.

"Son, what have you done?! You have ruined our plans!"

And when he faced Ichiro's direction again, when he looked at his son in the eyes, his own hazel ones widened in horror.

"Y-You…" He was in shock, had become paralyzed by what he saw.

That color.

Those eyes.

Those intense, Ruby eyes, unfortunately, he recognized them anywhere. Those Ruby eyes haunted his dreams for months and months.

"H-How?!" He took a wary step back, his body trembling in confusion, in fear.

"S-Son…" And then he gasped, for that's when he felt Ichiro's hand on his neck.

"S-stop, son" He could barely say the words, could barely let them out, feeling him squeeze his neck, squeeze hard there. Hard enough to weaken him, to make him feel lightheaded and delay his movements, but not kill him.

… _This is all because of you…_ Were Shizuru's angry thoughts, _…You brought me here, you erased my past..._ squeezing harder, _…You stole two years of my life that I will never get back…_ And this man's son, the body she was in right now, tried to kill Natsuki, tried to kill her wife!

Today, her worst nightmares had almost come to light, had almost come true. Natsuki, the love of her life, the bravest, sweetest, most loyal person that she knew, had almost died by her own hand.

Almost.

She put Natsuki at risk, she'll never forgive herself for this.

Never.

This was her own fault.

She had been so happy that she had momentarily let her guard down. The magic, the love, was in the air, it was all around. Today, from the very beginning, it truly felt like a fairytale. She had let herself be in the moment, feel the happiness, the joy, momentarily forgetting about everything else.

But this will never happen again, never. Tonight she would end this for sure, even if it costs her her own life. _…You will pay for this, both of you will…_

Shizuru then let go of him, threw him hard on the floor. And as she heard him cough and gasp for air, she calmly walked over to his desk and grabbed a large, unused syringe from one of the drawers.

"How are you doing this?!" The man shouted between coughs, "How… How is this possible?!" he was feeling a little dizzy from the fall, and had also hurt his shoulder because of the roughness of his landing, "What have you done to my son?!" and then, he started to slowly crawl backwards, placing some distance between them, or at least trying to.

Shizuru silently made her way over to the panicky man. It's not like she could talk anyway, she couldn't give him any answers, couldn't respond.

And she didn't want to delay his death any longer, she wanted him silent, couldn't stand his voice any longer. His presence, his existence, the fact that he was still breathing, greatly bothered her.

"N-No… No… Please don't… P-Please"

Once she was next to him, her right foot went for his chest. She pressed him hard against the ground, keeping him there.

"P-Please don't hurt me" He begged, he could sense his end was near.

He had a feeling they would meet again someday, that he would die by her hand somehow.

When she was their captive, her Ruby eyes told him that. Everyday he tortured her, every time he looked at her, her eyes told him that. They told him that he was hers. That he was her kill. And that she won't have mercy on him. Not even a little bit.

And Shizuru, she slowly kneeled, and then, straddled him. She wanted her face close to his.

Why?

Because she wanted to see his fear from up close.

And she wanted him to look into her eyes.

She wanted her Ruby eyes to be the only thing, the last thing he saw before he died.

"P-Please…" He begged again, watching in fear as the possessed, young man pulled at the end of the syringe.

He knew what Deadly Beautiful was going to do to him, he had no doubt about it now. The large syringe was empty, there was no liquid, nothing inside it, it was empty yet full of air.

There were only two things she could possibly do, either stab him on the neck, on the artery, or stab him in his heart and fill his veins with air. Either way, it was painful, would cause his blood to clot, and the death was certain.

… _This is for all those months you tortured me…_ Her palm went for his forehead, keeping his head still against the ground. … _For all those months you kept me from the woman I love…_ And she stabbed the side of his neck with the syringe. … _For using her memory to break me…_ And then, slowly, very, very slowly, she pushed the air into his veins. … _For all those nights you possessed my body, controlled my mind…_ And she took the syringe out and tossed it to the side. _…For all the tears that left Natsuki's eyes…_

She brought the other hand to his face, grabbing him, keeping him still, making sure they met eye to eye as the air traveled into his brain.

… _Scream for me…_ And soon after, he did. He was hyperventilating, shaking and screaming in pain, in agony.

… _I want to see your fear, hear your pain…_ His head was moving side to side, his body shaking, his eyes wide.

And when he closed his eyes tightly, _…Look at me…_ she opened them for him again. _…See me…_ He wasn't allowed to look away. Not for a second.

"D-Deadly Beautiful…" He somehow let out once his body had stopped with the violent spasms. "You truly are…" And after those words were said, it didn't take him long to pass away.

 **Meanwhile,**

 **Garderobe**

Meanwhile, back on planet Earl, Youko anxiously waited outside the building where the infirmary was located. Her indigo eyes searched the dark sky, knowing Natsuki should be arriving the premises any minute now.

She thought it would be a quiet night, an easy night, and now it seemed like it was going to be anything but.

It had been two in the morning when she received the urgent telephone call from Natsuki, telling her that she and Shizuru were on their way back to Garderobe. When she had asked why, had asked what had happened, the blunette quickly told her that she would explain once she had arrived.

It's been almost twenty minutes since that telephone call, and she could only wonder what went wrong. The way Natsuki had sounded on the phone, it was worrisome, disconcerting.

"Shizuru!" The moment she spotted the incoming blunette, she rushed towards her direction. Shizuru was in her arms, and she seemed to be unresponsive, unconscious, clad in a bloody bathrobe.

"What happened to her, Natsuki?" She asked as she quickly examined the woman in her arms, as she opened the woman's eyes.

"What… What on Earl is this?" Her indigo eyes widened when she saw they were completely black. "What caused this?"

"That's what we need to figure out" Was the worried response. "D-Do something, Youko. Bring her back"

 **Back on Planet Earth…**

Once that man was dead, Shizuru felt more at ease, more at peace. A calmness reigned over her, it was hard for her to explain.

One man down, but she still had one to go. The one whose body she was occupying right now.

Shizuru slowly stood, eyeing the dead man on the floor. Then, her Ruby eyes scanned her surroundings, the place she was in. Nothing in this place had changed, she noticed. Everything looked exactly like in her dreams, like in her memories.

She slowly walked over to the portal and stood in front of it. And even though she couldn't feel, she went ahead and touched its cool surface.

The portal, it looked like a large, metal square to her. It looked like an open door. And it looked like the control panel was on the side, looked like she didn't need to touch the computer to use it at all.

She then walked away from the large machine, walked to the opposite direction, towards the exit. That's when she noticed a man hiding, taking cover underneath a table.

When she got closer, she recognized the man, recognized the face. It was the same one from before, the friendly one from the hallway. _…Miracle's father…_ She was actually about to head out and look for him, try to talk to him and see what she could get out of him. Make some sense of this place.

She raised both of her arms, letting him know that she wasn't armed and that she meant him no harm. And then, she took a few steps back, and watched as he got out from underneath the table with the little girl behind him.

… _A-Ara. I hope she didn't see what I did to that man…_ Shizuru thought, knowing it must've been a scary sight for the little girl to have witnessed what had just happened here.

But then, she saw as Miracle giggled and waved 'hello', so Shizuru did so as well, she waved back at the little girl.

"You're not Ichiro-kun, are you?" Ryo cautiously asked, for not too long ago the young man's eyes were bright blue, blue as the sky. And also, because his daughter seemed to have relaxed, seemed open to him again, like that time when they met in the hallway about a week ago. That time, his eyes were also red. Red as the precious Ruby stone.

When Shizuru shook her head no, Ryo continued, "You're that woman, the one they held captive for a long time, aren't you" And then, he sincerely apologized, "I'm very sorry this happened to you"

And Shizuru didn't respond to that.

She couldn't say it was okay, because it wasn't okay. She couldn't say that she was over it, because she wasn't over it. This place, that time, what they did to her, how they had used the blunette's memory to break her, it scarred her deep within. She didn't know if she would ever truly heal from this.

"The General had it coming…" Ryo then said when his eyes fell upon the dead man, "He was a very horrible, greedy man, just like the rest of our colony. They all deserve to die here"

Shizuru had so many questions to ask, that sentence the man said alone instantly creating a few of them. But she didn't know enough sign language, enough vocabulary to communicate with him. She had only started learning it a week ago, and she thought she had more time. She wasn't expecting to be here today, be here right now, she was not prepared for this.

Just then, _…A-Ara?..._ she felt the earth move, _…Earthquake?..._ felt the ground shake. She remained unmoving, looking up at the ceiling. She was on alert for any incoming objects and waited for the shaking to subside.

This was a very old facility and had many large lights dangling on the ceiling. They didn't look very stable at all.

"Another piece of the moon probably fell…"

Upon hearing this, her eyes settled on the man again.

"It won't be long until the planet is destroyed"

And then, in sign language, she slowly said one of the words she had memorized, _"Earth?"_

She knew she was on Earth, she had to be. But she wanted to make sure, wanted to confirm it, to hear it from someone else.

"Yes, this is Earth… Or well, what's left of it" Was the sincere reply. "The pieces of the shattered moon are coming down more frequently now, it's only a matter of time"

And before Shizuru could process this, before she could think of another question to form, the man asked,

"Can you take my little girl to the other world?"

Shizuru looked at the man in the eyes, _...What?..._

"Can you find someone who'll take good care of her? Find her a good family?"

The next word Shizuru formed in sign language was, _"You"_ , meaning, 'You can cross over and take care of her. You are her family'

"Me?" Ryo had a puzzled expression, "Oh, I see. You don't know…" And then he chuckled once he had figured it out, "No, I can't. I'm afraid we don't last too long once we cross over"

… _What does he mean?..._ And then, in sign language, Shizuru asked, _"Why?"_

"Our bodies are too frail and too polluted with radiation…" Came the reply, "I'm not a scientist and I don't understand it too well, but that's the short version the General gave us" And then, he added, "We have sent people to your world in the past, they died within an hours' time"

… _I see…_ Shizuru's eyes fell on the little girl. ... _But won't she die as well?..._

And Ryo, as if sensing what she was thinking, whispered, "The special particles worked on her… It didn't work on the others, but it worked on her"

He walked over to the screen that displayed the little girl's vitals, asking her to follow him there. And once he was there, "See? Here is before the injection and here is the after" he said, pointing to the screen, "She's cured, she can talk… She could cross over to your world unharmed"

… _This is truly impressive…_ Shizuru thought as she viewed the information on the screen, the comparison. It was truly a miracle this girl was alive with such high levels of radiation, along with everything else that was wrong with her body. She had damaged lungs and a bad heart.

Shizuru then faced him, and asked, _"Others?"_

"Others?" Ryo scratched the back of his head, puzzled by what she meant by it.

And then and there, the earth started to move again, to shake a little harder than before, causing the lights to flicker off and on this time.

"Two times in a row…" Ryo subconsciously let out, "I guess the end is really near" He couldn't help and swallow.

And Shizuru, she waved at his face, trying to catch his attention again, _"Others?"_ She wanted to know if there were other women in the colony, other women or children who could possibly cross over to Earl. Who they could help.

"I'm sorry but I don't understand"

Shizuru then pointed to the little girl.

"Oh… No, Miracle is the only child in the colony… I think the second youngest is you, I mean, Ichiro-kun" And then, he thoughtfully added, "I believe Ichiro-kun was looking for female virgins before he approached me and asked if he could use the particles on her"

… _I see, so he must've found none…_ She finally got the answer she was looking for.

"I'm glad the particles didn't work on the others" Ryo then honestly let out, "To tell the truth, these people aren't very good people. They are greedy and miserable, just like the General. They want to go to the new world to take it over, to rule it. They only want revenge for being stuck in this dying planet" then, he let out a small chuckle, "But they're fools. They don't see that it is not those people's fault that we're stuck here. They didn't leave us behind, it was our own ancestors who decided to stay in this dying planet"

Shizuru listened, she carefully took in every word the man said.

And then, once again, the earth started to shake. It shook harder and longer this time, causing some items that were on the tables to fall on the ground, breaking upon impact.

"You should probably go" Ryo quickly suggested as he carried his scared, little girl, "Use the portal before it's too late…" He then hastily made his way over to the portal, walked over to it.

Once he was there, he pressed a few buttons and turned it on. He knew it would take some time for it to warm up, to power up. He was an engineer, he was the one who helped the General make the machine work.

"Take Miracle with you, find her a family who'll take good care of her… She doesn't deserve to die here, her life is just beginning" And when Shizuru did nothing, when she didn't move, "Please, there's nothing to think about! There's nothing you can do for us here! You're only wasting time!" He yelled, and then the earth started to shake violently again.

Shizuru nodded in understanding and walked over to their side, joining them near the portal. She looked at the portal, saw how the empty space had become bright blue and then had darkened a few seconds later. She could now see, see very clearly the other side. Could see the desert and could see that it was night.

That's when she asked, _"Why the desert?"_ This was one of the sentences she had memorized. She really wanted to know why the portal led them there, why it opened in that desert of all places.

"Why the desert?" Ryo repeated, scratching his head, "I'm not sure… It could be that's the place where the migrating ships first landed, where the signal was lost"

Ryo was right.

The migrating ships had a tracking device in them, and it sent out a signal for those who stayed on Earth and wanted to follow later. They had left a spaceship for those who stayed behind, in case they changed their minds later. The General had somehow figured out how to use the tracking device of the remaining spaceship to get to the new world using the portal. They couldn't use the spaceship, it had no power, they couldn't turn it on. Their ancestors had used the spaceships energy to survive in this dying world.

"You really should go" Ryo then quickly added, "People are going to start coming here soon looking for the General" And then, he kneeled, giving his little girl a long, tight hug.

"Be a good girl, okay?" He kissed his daughter on the forehead. "I love you, Miracle" She was so young, too young, she was about to be four years old in a couple of moths. Still young enough to forget this miserable, cold, dark place ever existed. To start a new life, a happy life somewhere else.

And before Shizuru could do anything, before she could ask anymore questions, the man had pushed them both inside the portal. _...A-Ara!..._

"Goodbye, my sweet little girl" He said with tears in his eyes, as he watched them fall on the sand, "Don't forget your Papa" And then he wiped the tears away and quickly left the lab. He was going to tell everyone in the colony that the General had sent him to tell them that everything was fine.

He didn't want them looking in the lab. If they found out that the General was dead, it would turn into complete chaos.

 **Meanwhile**

 **Garderobe**

"You should've told us, Shizuru" Youko softly let out as she watched the woman intently from afar. She was waiting for something to happen, for her to make some sort of movement, for her to wake up. "We could've helped"

It's been almost an hour since they had arrived at Garderobe. And as soon as they had reached the lab, she had administered the Nanomachines into Shizuru's bloodstream. The IV bag with the Nanomachine solution was nearly empty now, most of the liquid was already in Shizuru's body, coursing through her veins. Shizuru was, once again, an Otome. She could now transform into her Robe, had full access to its power.

She had also made Natsuki get into the Healing Chamber asap, ignoring all her cries and protests, for when the woman had Dematerialized, she noticed she had a deep wound on her neck.

The Nanomachines would take care of this. But a wound this deep, and in that delicate area, would take some time to heal. She just preferred not to risk it.

... _Why isn't this working?..._ She should've seen something by now, a change in her vitals, in her brain activity, but nothing had changed. The woman seemed to be worse than when she had been in the coma a week prior. She seemed completely braindead.

She was going over and over in her head what Natsuki had told her. That someone was using Shizuru, that they were controlling her somehow, possibly while she was asleep. ... _But how?..._ There was nothing in her body that would indicate this. No known technology that could do this, at least not to her knowledge.

\- Beep Beep -

And then, she walked over to the computer screen, for she had heard it suddenly beep. Once she got there, she pressed a few buttons, and then, her eyes widened by what she saw.

It was the readings, the strange readings from before.

They were back!

"Natsuki!" Youko called out to the woman, "The readings, they're back!"

And Natsuki, her hands trembled upon hearing this. She watched Shizuru's calm face with pursed lips, thinking. Thinking if the readings were back, it could only mean that the portal was open. It could only mean she could avenge Shizuru somehow, cross over and wreak havoc on those bastards. Make them pay for what they've done to her, and make them bring her back.

"I'll be right back" Natsuki whispered to her unresponsive wife, "Don't go anywhere, don't you dare die on me" placing a tender kiss on her hand. And then, she quickly ran. She ran out of the room, out of the building, screaming, "MATERIALIZE!" the moment she saw the dark, open sky.

And Youko, as she watched the woman run towards the door, she yelled her name, "Natsuki!" called out to her, telling her not to go alone. Not to cross that portal alone. That it wasn't safe.

"Damn it, why are they so thickheaded" Youko then quickly got in touch with Nao through the Gemstone and told her to meet Natsuki at the desert, at the usual spot. And told her to keep her eyes open and to be very careful.

After she was in the sky, it took Natsuki about fifteen minutes to arrive at that desert. That damn desert she can't seem to get away from.

She hastily looked around in aerial view once she got there, looking for it, for the black hole that Shizuru had described to her.

"There it is"

And she had found the portal, but not only that, there were some people there, some people near it, there was someone lying on the ground.

"Civilians?" She thought aloud as she neared them, but she knew it was impossible. At this time of night, and being in this place, it was impossible.

If they were near the portal, it could only mean one thing. Those people had crossed over, those people were from the other side.

Once her feet had touched the ground she quickly ran towards the man's side. There was little girl next to him, kneeling next to him. It looked like she was shaking him, telling him to get up.

Natsuki quickly kneeled next to the young man, wanting to see what was wrong with him. The way he was breathing, the way he desperately gasped for air, it seemed like he was dying. It didn't look like he had much time left.

"Is this your father?" Natsuki quickly asked the little girl. She seemed like she was three, no more than four years old.

And when the girl quickly shook her head no, Natsuki asked, "Where did you come from?" She just had to make sure.

And Miracle, she quickly stood and ran towards the black hole, pointing at it from a close distance.

"I see…" Natsuki watched the little girl closely, and then told her, "Stay here, you'll be safe here. I will be right back" and when she was about to stand, the man tightly held onto her arm. And when she looked at him, at his emotionless face, she saw as he slowly shook his head no.

No.

To not go into that portal.

To not go.

Natsuki's eyebrows furrowed when she took a better look at him, when her Emerald eyes fell upon those rare eyes of his.

Those eyes, those weren't his eyes. Only one person in the world had those Ruby irises.

... _Could it be?..._

And then, the young man did something she didn't expect him to do. A movement so intimate, something only Shizuru would do.

His trembling hand slowly reached upwards and softly tapped in between her furrowed brows before falling once again on the ground.

And Natsuki's Emerald eyes widened, letting out a shuddering gasp. "S-Shizuru? It is you"

… _Yes, it's me…_ Shizuru nodded her head once. _…See me, I am right here with you, I am by your side…_ And she brought a hand to her own chest, clumsily padding it twice, _…Kannin na, Natsuki…_ letting her know how deeply sorry she was. How sorry she was that things had turned out like this.

"B-But, how?"

And before Natsuki could utter another word, Shizuru slowly pointed to the approaching, little girl.

She felt like she didn't have much time. This body was weak, she could barely move anymore, couldn't even stand, and she guessed it was because he was dying, just as Ryo had said.

"What? What about her?" Natsuki whispered, seeing as the little girl took a seat next to the man.

And Shizuru wished she had a voice, wished she could thoroughly explain with words. All she could do was hug herself, wrap her arms around herself and hope that Natsuki would understand.

"Protect?" Natsuki let out, swallowing, "You want me to take care of her?"

… _Yes…_ And Shizuru slowly nodded her head again. … _Yes…_

"Shizuru" Natsuki quickly said, her heart pounding so fast. "What can we do to help" And she whispered, "How can we bring you back?"

But unfortunately, Shizuru didn't have an answer to that. _…I do not know, love…_ She slowly shook her head no.

She had no control over this for she had taken over Ichiro's possession. The connection had already been established, he had established it. She didn't know how to go back, how to leave this body, not under these circumstances.

BOOM!

Just then, an explosion was heard. It also came with some harsh wind.

BOOM!

BOOM!

And another, and another.

So Natsuki, she quickly grabbed the little girl and then used her body to protect her and Shizuru, to shield them from the blasts. And when she looked back at the direction of the sound, when she looked over at the portal, she saw a ray of light. She could see bright yellows and oranges and a little bit of red as well. The portal was no longer black, it had come alive with bright colors.

The explosions, it had come from inside.

And Shizuru, she felt herself leaving, felt herself weakening. The explosions probably destroyed whatever was keeping her mind in this body.

She reached out for Natsuki's face and she touched it one last time, the touch that caused her Emerald eyes to now be on her Ruby ones.

 _...I love you..._ She couldn't feel her, couldn't feel her softness, her warmth, but she was imagining that she could. _…I love you with all my heart, Natsuki…_ Her shaky fingers formed a straight line. _...May we meet again, my love, in this life or the next..._ She touched Natsuki's forehead, her nose, her lips her chin. _…Kannin na…_ And then, she completely lost her sight. The darkness had consumed her. Everything around her went dark.

"Shizuru?" Natsuki cautiously asked, "Shi- Shizuru?"

But Natsuki knew that Shizuru was no longer with her, she knew that Shizuru was gone. She knew this because the man was now starting to cough, was emitting sound. And his eyes, his eyes were no longer the color of the brunette's.

It was those eyes, those bright, blue ones she had seen on Shizuru when she was stabbing her neck. When she was being controlled.

"YOU!" She screamed at the man in rage, her hand quickly going for his neck, "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO SHIZURU! ANSWER ME!"

"AAAHHH!" But Ichiro could only scream in agony. "AAAHHH!" Scream in pain over and over again once he had gained control of his body. Not because Natsuki had a tight hold of his neck, no, not at all, but because he felt as if his whole body was on fire on the inside, he felt like he was burning up. He felt as if there were insects crawling on his body, feasting on his skin. And he couldn't breathe, he could barely catch his breath. He was slowly suffocating.

And Natsuki, she quickly let go of his neck only to touch her Gem, "Youko" She called the woman, "How is Shizuru, has she regained consciousness yet?"

" _No, not yet, Natsuki, what's going-"_

And before Youko could say another word, Natsuki closed the connection.

"Listen to me, you bastard" Natsuki slapped the frantic man's cheek with force, "Listen to me!" wanting to gain his undivided attention. "Shizuru is not waking up, how do I wake her up?!" She yelled at him, grabbing him by the collar.

But Ichiro was hysterical. He couldn't see nor hear past the feeling, past the pain. Not until the woman slapped him again and then held onto his head with both hands, keeping him focused.

"Listen to me!"

Ichiro looked at her in the eyes, his head and body shaking from the pain.

"Shizuru is not waking up" She said again, repeated.

"D-Deadly Beautiful…" He could barely let out.

And Natsuki, she had no idea what the hell that meant. "What have you done to Shizuru?" Instead, she asked again, "What did you do to her? How do I bring her back? She's not waking up"

"I-I don't know how to bring her back" He answered between shuddering breaths. "S-She didn't disconnect, I don't think she knew how… A-And- and the equipment was destroyed" He looked at the direction of the portal, noticed it was now gone. His planet was probably destroyed now, what was left of his people, dead. And then,

"Her mind is lost" he said, "T-The… The darkness has her now"

And Natsuki's hands and lips trembled. She wished she could crush his skull flat with her bare hands. That answer that he had given her just now, it was not acceptable.

It was not acceptable!

"You are Natsuki, right?" He said between gasps. He felt so numb now, so cold now, so void of pain now. Perhaps his life was coming to an end. "She called your name many times when she was unconscious… when she was in pain"

And Natsuki let go of his head and grabbed him by the collar again. One trembling hand went up in the air, turned to a tight fist. Her Emerald eyes blurry, her lips trembling with emotion.

"She loves you, her heart is connected to you, I know it" He then said to her, looking her direction, but not at her.

He was looking past her, looking at the sky, at the starry night. This was a desert, but it was so beautiful here. So calm unlike his world. In his world, the desert was always alive. Always alive with harsh, howling winds, with sound. With the sound of death.

"Don't leave her in there… If you love her, make her feel the connection, make her feel your… your love" He really hated this blunette, hated her with all of his being. She stole Deadly Beautiful from him. But although it was wicked, he loved the brunette even more.

" _In the darkness,_ be her eyes…" He said to her, advised her, " _In the darkness_ , be her light" Whispered to her, brought some consolation to her, " _In the darkness_ , be her source" after a short moment, "Guide her, she needs you now more than ever" And then he said to her, this time looking into her teary Emerald eyes, "She's far too precious, we should've never let her go"

And one more time, he repeated his last, dying words,

"She's far too precious... Deadly Beautiful she will always be to me" And after that, Ichiro was gone.

And the last remaining survivor of Planet Earth after the migration occurred, was the pink eyed little girl. The one now tightly holding onto Natsuki's arm, staring at her with those hopeful, innocent eyes.

\- o -

\- o -

\- o -

 **A Few Months Later…**

Natsuki watched with folded arms and a tender smile as Miracle ran around the Moon Garden with Arika, giggling and chasing after the butterflies.

The little girl was very loving, extremely energetic, happy and curious and sweet. Sweet in a very mischievous way, however. In many ways, she reminded her of Shizuru.

"Miracle" Natsuki called out to her, "Have you picked the flowers that you want to bring to Shizuru today?" She softly asked.

That's what they were here for, to pick out flowers, flowers to set next to Shizuru's bed.

They did this every couple of days. They would pick out fresh flowers to gift to Shizuru, to decorate her room with. Flowers grown from all over the Academy.

Sometimes, the little girl wanted to bring her colorful flowers, colorful roses from the Rose Garden. And sometimes, they would pick out white Jasmines from the Moon Garden. It all depended on the little girl's mood that day.

Four months have passed since that day, since that night. And there was not a day that went by that Natsuki didn't stop by her wife's room during the day to spend time with her.

To bathe her and take care of her.

To talk to her.

To hold her hand.

To whisper in her ear that she loved her, that she missed her.

Begged her to please come back to her.

She'd sit there on the couch and slept next to her bed every night, holding her hand, trying not to cry and be strong for her. She never left her side at night. Never. She never wanted her to feel alone.

She always did this, was always present, even when she was upset at her, angry at her after she had found all the books the brunette had in her old room, after she had found all the research and all the notes she had made. Shizuru had kept a lot to herself, a lot more than Natsuki had thought, had imagined. Shizuru didn't share anything with her.

They were supposed to trust one another, confide in one another, they were supposed to protect one another, tell these important things to one another, and Shizuru didn't. She had kept it all to herself, and it took Natsuki a very long time to come to terms with her for this, to forgive her for this.

But she was there nevertheless. Even when she was upset. Because she loved her, truly loved her, she would never stop being there for her.

And even though she had nothing to say she still talked to her, read to her, told her about her day, said anything so that she could hear her voice. So that she could feel that she wasn't alone. So that she knew that she was safe, that she was with her. That she would always be.

After a month of being monitored and cooped up in the lab, Natsuki decided it was probably best for Shizuru to be in a new scenery, in a different environment. That it would be good for her, perhaps even lift her spirits to change location. So, she went up to her old room and cleaned it up for her to move her there along with all the medical equipment, that's how she had found the books and the research. That's when Natsuki broke down in tears, in anger, in disbelief, in wonder.

What was Shizuru thinking?

How long had she been planning and plotting?

What exactly was she planning to do?

How far was she willing to go?

She won't know the answers to these questions until Shizuru awoke.

Since she knew that Shizuru loved sitting by her window to admire the night sky, she decided to make some adjustments to the bedroom, to move the bed there. That way, she could hear the songs of the birds, she could feel the breeze hit her skin, feel the sun caress her face, feel the moonlight embrace her in the night.

She also framed a few pictures she had found in a white box in her closet and placed them next to her bed. She had framed a picture of Shizuru and her parents, and also a picture of her and the brunette taken when they were younger.

She tried to surround her with beautiful things, the things she loved and cared about. Tried to surround her with the people she loved. So, anyone who wanted to come in and see her, come in and talk to her, could. Her door was always open.

Even her parents came to visit a few times. Her father, who had never step foot out of Duran in his whole life, had come. And even her own mother had joined him in every one of his visits.

Her mother had told her that she was sorry, to please forgive her, and that she sees, that she acknowledges her anguish, her pain. That she acknowledges that she was hurting, and that she acknowledges her relationship with the brunette, acknowledges their marriage.

She also told her that she will try to change her ways. And she had even called Shizuru by her first name, no malice or hate in it. She had her loving mother again.

She wasn't sure how long she would be allowed to keep Shizuru like this, keep her alive in this state. But as long as Shizuru wasn't hurting, she was willing to wait as long as she could, because she knew that Shizuru would come back to her one day. She had to believe that she would, she had to. That belief was the only thing keeping her alive right now.

"I want these ones for mommy!" Miracle happily replied, pointing to a large bunch on a bush.

Mommy.

That's what Miracle called her and Shizuru these days. Mommy. She has been doing that for two months now.

She didn't know if to correct the little girl when she says it or not.

When Shizuru had said to take care of Miracle, to what extent did she mean? Was she supposed to adopt her? Or was she supposed to find good parents who'll take care of her? What was she supposed to do?

She'd hope to figure it out soon, that Shizuru would wake up soon. The more the time passed, the more attached she was becoming to this little girl. The more the time passed, the harder it will be for her to let her go. Her presence, her happiness, her innocence, made these painful, dark, lonely days a little better.

"Those are a great choice" Natsuki smiled at the little girl and then walked over to the white bush. She bent on one knee, placing the vase with water on the floor next to her, and cut the flowers just the right length, adding them neatly one by one into the vase.

Once she had enough flowers, she closed her eyes and brought the flowers to her face, to her nose, softly inhaling its wonderful scent.

"S-Shizuru…" She let out in a desperate whisper, her heart always aching for the woman she loved.

She felt as the bright sun warmed her skin, warmed her lips, the way Shizuru's lips warmed her when she kissed her.

Felt as the wind caressed her face, caress her softly, so softly, just the way Shizuru would had she been awake.

" _Natsuki…"_

And then she looked up and slowly opened her Emerald eyes. Opened her Emerald eyes to see the blue sky above.

"Shizuru" It was strange, this inexplicable feeling that had taken over her, this feeling as if someone was calling her, pulling at her heart. This feeling of restlessness, of uneasiness. She just couldn't stay still, she was finding it hard to do so.

" _Natsuki"_

"Shizuru" She had this inexplicable urge to go to her, to be by her side right this instant. She had to see her, see the love of her life.

"Arika, keep an eye on Miracle for me!" She quickly told the teenager as she stood, and then ran. Ran as fast as she could, as fast as her feet would allow, leaving the vase with white flowers behind.

She swiftly maneuvered through the long, familiar, white halls leading to the quarters. She could feel her rapid heart, could hear it beating wildly in her ears.

And when she reached that door, _her_ door, when she reached for the knob, she could feel her body shaking, totally shaking as she tried to catch her breath.

She breathed deeply one more time and twisted the knob. And when she slowly opened the door, there Shizuru was. She was sitting on the bed, looking at the pictures she had set for her on the nightstand. She couldn't see well because of the morning sunlight blaring in through the window, but it looked like Shizuru had just woken up.

Natsuki couldn't believe it.

Shizuru was conscious.

Shizuru was awake!

"Shi… Shizuru" She called out to her, still unable to believe her Emerald eyes, unable to move from her current spot.

She was hypnotized, completely mesmerized by the sight.

And when Shizuru looked up, when she faced the blunette's direction, when she saw her, "Natsuki" she hoarsely let out, her heart accelerating, pounding, beating like never before. She softly smiled at her and then slowly raised from the bed, feeling a little frail, a little weak from all those months lying there.

"You… Y-You have a lot of explaining to do" Was the huskily spoken sentence, Emerald eyes never leaving the brunette's form.

She dared not blink, dared not to, for if she did, perhaps she would find that this was all an illusion. That this was not real. And she really needed this vision to be real.

"I know I do…" Kyoto-ben softly answered, her words broken because she hasn't used her voice in many months. "I will explain everything, I won't leave a single detail behind" She said while slowly making her way to the blunette.

"You…" Natsuki swallowed again, taking a wary step forward, her vision starting to blur, "You left me on our wedding night" still unable to believe her eyes. Shizuru was so close now, just a few steps in front of her now. "You're a very bad wife, Shizuru" These last words were so soft.

"Indeed I am" Shizuru whispered to her, her trembling hands reaching for the blunette's now teary face, finally being able to touch her, to feel her softness, to feel her warmth. "I'm sorry that I left, that I worried you, but I'm here now" And she caressed her tenderly there, "I promise you, I'm never leaving you again"

And Natsuki closed her eyes, for Shizuru had leaned forward, for Shizuru's lips were now touching her own. A kiss so tender, a kiss so sweet her lips could've been covered with honey for all she knew.

And when their lips parted, "I heard you…" Shizuru told her, whispered to her, tears now running down her cheeks as well. Tears of joy, tears of ache.

"I heard you… I heard every word you said, I felt every sentiment" Yes, she did. In her voice, she heard her joy, heard her sadness. Heard her anger, her helplessness and despair. She heard her love. Yes, she heard it all. She felt it all. She remembers every word.

And through the tears, Shizuru smiled at her, she said to her,

" _In the darkness_ , I felt your kindness. _In the darkness_ , I felt your warmth" her fingers caressed the blunette's moist yet reddened cheeks, her thumbs caressed her slightly parted, trembling lips, " _In the darkness_ , I felt your love"

And finally, " _Ookini_ , Natsuki" She smiled at her again, closing her eyes and pressing their foreheads together, her hands now touching Natsuki's upper arms, "For loving me despite of what I did. It was your love that was my light, it was your love that showed me the way back"

And all Natsuki could say was, "Welcome home, Shizuru" sobbing, embracing her tightly, reality finally sinking in. Shizuru was here, really here. Shizuru had really awoken from her long sleep. "W-Welcome home, my love"

And Shizuru embraced her just as tightly, just as desperately, just as needfully, "I'm home"

 **~ Fin ~**

* * *

 **Thanks for Reading!**

 **And Thanks for the Reviews/ PMs/ Comments**

 **I hope you enjoyed this story, and this ending :) If not feel free to complaint, I'm all ears.**

 **Next will be the Epilogue. It will be short, and _probably_ very sweet :)**

 **A few things I thought you should know:**

 **1\. I didn't want ShizNat to be separated in this story, except for the first few chapters. They had a lot going on individually already (Natsuki with her issues, Shizuru with her disappearance and memory loss. This is what the story is really about, them as a couple dealing with these things)**

 **2\. It was my intention for Youko and Natsuki to not get anywhere close to finding out what happened to Shizuru or where she had been.**

 **3\. It was also my intention for the Earthlings to never find the source (Fumi)**

 **4\. This was why I created such a complicated technology (for reasons 2 and 3)**

 **5\. And finally, from the beginning, I wanted this to be Shizuru's battle. I didn't want Natsuki to get involved.**

 **As always, let me know what you think of the chapter/ Ending/ or Story in general.**

 **And if there are any questions, or something that might've left you puzzled, leave it with the review and I will answer it in the Epilogue, or PM me.**

 **THANK YOU all very much for the support!**

 **May we meet again in another ShizNat story someday.**

 **Writing "For the love of ShizNat"**


	18. Chapter 18 - Epilogue

**In the Darkness**

 **A Mai Otome ShizNat Story**

 **Epilogue**

 **~ o ~**

 **Four Years Later…**

It was a quiet, calm, spring morning in Garderobe.

Spring is the season of starting over, the season of new beginnings. The Academy had already had the graduation ceremony a few days ago, this event marking the end of the school year.

The Pearls who passed all their tasks and exams returned to their Nations as Meister Otomes. And those who didn't needed to stay in Garderobe another year, if their Nations allowed it, that is. Garderobe was very, _very_ expensive, not everyone could afford it.

This little time in between, in between graduation and the opening ceremony that would take place in two weeks, was when students had a short break and went back to their Nations to pay a visit to their families. Most Corals and Pearls had already left the Academy, so the schoolgrounds were very quiet, too quiet... eerily quiet.

The day couldn't have been any better, to tell the truth. It was a good day, a cool day. The sun was shining, making everything in its path beautifully bright. The birds were flying, spiritedly chasing one another in the vast sky. The only sound that could be heard was that of the gentle breeze playing with the trees, the sound of the breeze caressing its flowers and radiant, green leaves.

"W-Where the hell is she?!"

Oh, and there was that as well.

That sound came from the Kruger-Viola quarters, from the Master bedroom to be precise. So, perhaps this spring morning wasn't so calm and quiet after all.

"D-Did you talk to her?!" Natsuki hissed. Her Emerald eyes shut tightly, her cheeks flushed, drops of sweat were forming on her creasing forehead again.

Her hands grabbed the white, silky sheets below her tightly, very tightly, making her knuckles white. She was preparing, preparing for the next wave of pain that was approaching. She could feel it coming. She could feel it.

Could _feel_ it.

" _K-Kami sama_ , please have mercy on me" Was the whisper, the husky shudder.

"Breathe slowly, Natsuki" Mai calmly advised her.

She was sitting behind the blunette on the bed, supporting her and gently rubbing her sweaty back. She was trying to soothe her, to make the contractions a little better. To keep her breathing at a normal pace. Doing what Shizuru was supposed to be doing right now.

"Shizuru's almost here, Natsuki, just focus on your breathing, just like you practiced, ne?" Youko answered, sitting at the foot of the bed, rubbing the woman's very swollen legs.

She was keeping track of how far apart the contractions were. By the closeness of them, it seemed like Natsuki was ready to give birth.

"D-Did… Did you call the hospital? W-Where they able to find my doctor?!" The blunette then asked between breaths.

"I'll call again and find out" Was Youko's response.

"T-This is a complete disaster" In Natsuki's eyes, everything that could've possibly gone wrong happened. Everything Natsuki feared.

First, the baby was way too early, Natsuki wasn't due for another three weeks.

Second, her wife was not in Wind Bloom right now. She was hundreds of miles north at a diplomatic conference and wasn't supposed to return until tomorrow. Mai had immediately called her when Natsuki woke up with labor pains, and Shizuru had said she'd be on her way to Garderobe right away.

Third, her doctor was nowhere to be found. They had called the hospital and the nurses had said that he had taken a couple of days off, but that they would find him, and that they would send another doctor to Garderobe in the meantime to help.

Fourth, her mother was supposed to be here with her on this scary, important day. But since the baby wasn't expected for another three weeks, her mother wouldn't be in Wind Bloom for another week or so.

Fifth, she wasn't supposed to give birth here, in her quarters, in her home. She was supposed to be at the hospital. But once again, since the baby was early, Natsuki hadn't expected that the pain she had been feeling the past twelve hours had anything to do with her being in labor. So, it was too late now to move, it was too late to go to the hospital.

And the list of wrongs kept piling up. Everything that wasn't supposed to happen, happened, and Natsuki was going insane, was a worried mess. Especially since Shizuru, her _calmer_ half, wasn't around.

"Shizuru, p-please get here soon" Was all Natsuki could whisper once the pain had subsided a little.

Youko quickly left the bedroom to call the hospital again, but before doing so, she handed Nao, who was watching from the nearest wall, the stopwatch so that she could take her place in timing the contractions.

"How will I know?" Nao asked with a raised, fine brow, looking at the white, small item now in her hand.

"Trust me, you'll know" Was the rushed reply.

Nao sighed and then stood next to a panting Natsuki by the bed, a hand on the back of her neck.

"Y-You!" Natsuki hissed at the _now_ Second Column, heavily breathing through her mouth. She reached for the woman's collar and grabbed her tightly there. "W-Why did you have to send her away now?! Why?!" She was preparing again, another wave was coming soon, she could feel it, it was close, so, so close.

"You made the schedule, not me. Her not being here right now is your fault" Nao glared at the pregnant woman.

And Natsuki pursed her quivering lips, because Nao was right, she was the one who had made the schedule.

Shizuru being away the past three days was her own doing.

Now that she thought about it, she had a feeling that the stress of Shizuru being away while her due date was approaching was probably the cause of her early labor.

"Hands off, don't forget who I am now" Nao added with a huge smirk as she pointed to the trembling hands on her collar.

Natsuki was no longer a Column, was no longer the Headmistress of the Academy. She had renounced her position a year ago, along with the Silver Ice Crystal which was a property of Garderobe, to expand the Kruger-Viola family, to have children. She had promised her father that she would be the one to carry their first child, for the 'Kruger' blood, to keep the Kruger tradition alive.

When she talked about this, talked about retiring with the other Columns, they had decided that Nao should take on the responsibility instead of making one of the graduating Pearls the Second Column and have her carry this _not-so-heavy_ burden. _Not-so-heavy_ because the Nations were at peace now, the job was much easier to handle now. And Nao had made Wind Bloom her permanent home. She never left the Nation, unlike the other Columns, in everyone's eyes she was the best choice.

Nao had been hesitant at first. Being stuck in the 'old lady's club' was not her thing, was not in her plans, but she agreed in the end since it wouldn't interfere with her _other nighttime activities_. Actually, now that she didn't have to report to anyone or go out on random missions, which she was sure Natsuki had done to her on purpose, she had more liberty to do as she pleased.

Shizuru would've been the best replacement since she was Headmistress Deputy. But she was thinking of retiring in another couple of years herself to live a quieter life, a homey life with her growing family. And everyone knew that Shizuru was best out on the field anyway. She had immense talent, superb detective and persuading skills. The woman was too clever for her own good. No one did the job as fast and as meticulously as her.

And although Natsuki was no longer a Column, she still worked at Garderobe. She guided and advised the new Headmistress and was also the Political Science teacher. She was no longer an Otome, a Column, but she was very much a part of the Academy, very much a part of every decision that was made.

" _K-Kami sama_ " Natsuki shuddered again, shutting her eyes and gritting her teeth, holding onto Nao even tighter. "Nnnnn~" letting out a long whimper in the process.

That's when Nao stopped the watch and looked at the time, engraving it in her brain, and then reset it and started it again.

"You're doing great, Natsuki. Keep breathing!" Mai cheerfully encouraged her friend, ignoring everything else around her, ignoring the conversations to be able to perform this task.

When Youko entered the room again, she didn't come empty handed. She came with a bucket of warm water, a few fresh towels, and her nurses kit.

"W-What- what are you doing? What's that for?" Natsuki warily asked as she let go of Nao, although she already knew the answer to those questions. It looked like Youko had prepared to deliver the baby herself.

When no answer came,

" _I-Ie_ , not yet" Natsuki pleaded between labored breaths, instinctively closing her shaky legs. "S-She's not here, she's supposed to be here with me, w-we have to wait!"

"Natsuki, the baby can't wait any longer, she's ready to come out... She's been ready for some time now" Was the gentle, honest reply.

Yes, you heard that right. _She_. Shizuru and Natsuki were having a baby girl!

"S-Shizuru, please hurry…" And then another wave of pain hit her body, her legs trembled open, "P-Please" and then she shrieked in pain.

"N-Natsuki!"

And then and there, it was as if all of Natsuki's prayers and pleas had been answered.

"Natsuki!"

For she heard hurried steps, heard as worried Kyoto-ben had repeatedly shouted her name, had quickly ran inside the Master bedroom and had rushed to her side.

And rushing behind her was her doctor along with two nurses.

The heavens had answered her prayers, Shizuru was here, her doctor was here, everything was right in the world again.

"Natsuki, are you okay?" Shizuru quickly pushed Nao out of the way,

"HEY, watch it!"

hearing Nao complaint.

Her Ruby eyes desperately meeting Emerald ones, her trembling hands on her wife's sweaty and very blushing face. "T-Talk to me, Natsuki"

"W-What took you so damn long?!" Was the hissing, angry response. She quickly grabbed the brunette by the back of her neck. It had been three days since she had seen her, three days since she felt those lips on hers, so she pulled her in for a rough kiss, a rough press of lips before whimpering in pain again against those same lips. "Nnnnnnnnnnn~"

"Okay everyone, please clear the room" The doctor commanded as he came out of the restroom with his hands squeaky clean and his jacket off. "We have an impatient baby on the way"

And soon, everyone, except for the nurses and Shizuru, cleared the room. Shizuru took Mai's place behind Natsuki, being her rock, helping her stay in place.

"Hang in there just a little longer, Natsuki" Shizuru cooed, grabbing her wife's shaky hands after she had settled behind her. "You're doing great, my love. Do as we practiced, breathe…" She breathed in with her and then breathed out.

And twenty-five minutes later, after a lot of breathing and pushing and whimpering and screaming, after a lot of loving and encouraging Kyoto-ben accented words, the newest member of the Kruger-Viola family was born. A healthy, beautiful, Emerald eyed baby girl that resembled a little bit of them both.

"She's wonderful, Natsuki" A teary eyed Shizuru whispered to her very exhausted wife, giving her an amorous kiss on her sweaty, bare shoulder.

She was still behind her, still by her side as the doctor took care of her very tender, _private_ area. The nurses had brought the baby over to them, had settled the baby on Natsuki's bare chest so that she could have the first mommy-daughter contact, skin to skin contact before taking her away to bathe her and clean her up, dress her and wrap her up nicely in a blanket.

"Thank you for this wonderful gift" Emotional Kyoto-ben whispered to the blunette, wishing she could embrace her wife and daughter tightly, but she couldn't, that would hurt them. "I love you, Natsuki… I love you so much"

"And I love you, Shizuru" Natsuki softly said, weakly smiling at their sleepy bundle of joy. And then, she adjusted her head just a little to the side, wanting her wife to kiss her, to feel her wife's lips on her own.

 **~ o ~**

 **A Few Hours Later…**

It was now late afternoon, and Shizuru was in the kitchen preparing supper, Mai right beside her helping her.

While Shizuru was away, she had asked Mai to stay with Natsuki and Miracle, to keep them company, and mostly to keep an eye on Natsuki since she was so close to the due date. Mai was going to stay a few more days to help until Saeko arrived.

Everyone else had already left. It was just Natsuki, Shizuru, Mai and the baby in the Kruger-Viola quarters.

They had cleaned the bedroom; fresh silky sheets were now covering the bed. Shizuru had helped Natsuki bathe and change into fresh, loose, maternity clothing. She was really going to miss seeing her wife with her big belly, she was just so cute, so moody and overly demanding when pregnant. It was really endearing.

Natsuki had been very tired and in need of a long nap after her shower. So, after having something light to eat she slept for a few hours. She was now awake, breastfeeding their hungry baby girl in the Master bedroom. The doctor had ordered her to rest, to stay in bed for a couple of days.

"She's so cute, Shizuru" Mai smiled as she made the noodles from scratch. Tonight, to everyone's delight, would be a Ramen night. Packed with meat and vegetables to give Natsuki all the strength she needs to recover.

"She really is lovely, isn't she?" Was Kyoto-ben's happy reply. "I have a feeling she's going to be a little heartbreaker"

"Mommy, aunty Mai, I'm home~"

That was Miracle, who was now seven, about to turn eight years old in a few months.

She was just getting home from elementary school. After school was over, she had _Kendo_ practice. She was interested in the sport and had joined the club, that's the reason she was getting home at this time.

After Shizuru had awoken from the darkness, had awoken from her long sleep, she had a serious conversation with Natsuki regarding the little girl's fate, about her future. She asked the blunette if they could adopt her, if they could be the family that she needed. And Natsuki had said yes without a second thought. She had grown to love the little girl, there was nothing to think about, to talk about. So, they adopted her right away. The little girl was now a Kruger-Viola, she had their love and shared their last name.

When the little girl was older, they would tell her where she came from, tell her what little they knew about her heroic father. Although, they were sure the little girl knew, that she remembered, because whenever talks about Earth came up at home, her pink eyes showed a glint of sadness that was then replaced with a gentle smile.

She definitely knew. They knew that she knew. Without a doubt.

The smell of delicious food guided Miracle straight to the kitchen, "Mommy!" then yelled in delight when she found a smiling Shizuru heading her way, she wasn't expecting her to be home.

She ran to her, and when Shizuru had kneeled on the floor she excitedly jumped on her. "I missed you, mommy!"

"I missed you too, love" Came the loving reply. She hugged her little girl tightly and then gave her a few pecks on the cheek.

"Have you been behaving?" She then asked her, removing her backpack for her, and then started to head towards the little girl's bedroom, holding her hand.

She left Mai alone, knowing she could handle herself well in the kitchen. She was a chef, a pro, she didn't need her help.

When the little girl nodded yes, "That's my girl…" Shizuru happily replied, "Ne, Miracle?" then added a few seconds later, "Guess who arrived today?" she kneeled in front of her again, wanting to see eye to eye.

"Who, mommy?" The girl quickly asked.

"She's very small, and mommy's belly used to be her home" Shizuru gave her a few hints as she took off her navy jacket and placed it on the floor with the backpack.

Miracle gasped, eyes wide. "Baby sister is here?"

" _Hai_ " Came the soft reply.

"She's early!"

"She is..." Shizuru agreed, "Let's wash our hands and then go meet her, ne? She's very excited to meet her big sister"

Miracle nodded, but when Shizuru started walking away she didn't follow.

"Is something wrong?" Kyoto-ben asked in wonder, standing by the girl's door.

"Um… Mommy, what if the baby doesn't like me?"

" _Ara~_ , why wouldn't she?" The brunette asked, walking back to the little girl and kneeling again. "She loved you when she was in mommy's belly, she'll love you even more now that she's out and can touch you and see you and play with you" She sweetly smiled at her.

"Okay…" But Miracle didn't sound too convinced.

"She's going to love you, ne?" Shizuru said, caressing her cheek, "I promise" and then, "Let's go, let's not keep her waiting, and mommy wants to see you as well" she stood and offered her hand, and Miracle happily accepted it.

They walked out of the bedroom and went straight for the restroom and washed and dried their hands. When they arrived at the Master bedroom, Miracle knocked on the door twice, and then opened it just a little bit, her head peaking through first before opening the door wider. "Mommy?"

"There you are…" Natsuki smiled when she saw her wife and child coming into the room. "We've been waiting for you to come home"

The blunette had already finished giving the baby her milk and had lay her gently in the comfortable bassinet next to the bed.

The baby would be sleeping in their bedroom for the next two to three months, since she would be waking up frequently in the nighttime to eat. Every three hours or so the doctor had explained. Once she was old enough, she would be sleeping in her crib in her own bedroom.

"How are you feeling?" Once they had reached the bed, Shizuru gently sat down next to the blunette, "Were you able to rest a little?" She asked the love of her life, a hand softly caressing her cheek while the other held her hand. And when Natsuki hummed in response, she leaned forward for a gentle kiss, together with an _I love you_ afterwards.

"Come, Miracle" Natsuki padded to the empty space next to her, and Miracle happily obliged. "Are you ready to meet your little sister?" She asked her, feeling as Shizuru left her side, left the bed to get the baby.

Once the cooing baby was in her arms, Shizuru couldn't contain her smile. This was one of the happiest days of her life.

She gently rocked the baby in her arms for a few seconds as she admired her. Her Ruby eyes met tiny Emerald ones for the fourth time today. Those beautiful eyes that smiled at her every time they met, that were so precious to her, just like her family, like her wife and eldest daughter.

Shizuru couldn't contain her emotions, her emotions that were running wild. She was teary eyed again, letting out a shuddering breath.

"You okay, Shizuru?" Natsuki had to ask, for Shizuru had yet to face their direction and she could see a slight tremble in her posture.

" _Hai…_ " Shizuru then softly answered, a hand going for her eyes to wipe the salty liquid that had accumulated there. " _Hai_ , I'm fine" Then, she slowly turned around and joined the two occupants on the bed. "I'm just so happy, Natsuki" She told her, was completely honest with her, "Tell me this is real" then asked.

Ever since she woke up from her long sleep, she was afraid that she was stuck in a dream. An eternal dream. A happy dream. Afraid that she was still _in the darkness_ somewhere, that her mind was trapped in there, playing games with her, creating a perfect illusion for her.

Nightmares clouded her sleep from time to time. Not often, not as before, just sometimes. And she woke up covered in sweat when she dreamt of those two years she was away. Woke up screaming when dreaming of a dead blunette. There were times she was afraid of the dark, and she had to remind herself that those were nightmares, and this, this happiness, it felt like a dream, a dream that had become her reality.

This wasn't a dream. This was reality. It was. It had to be.

Natsuki placed a hand on her thigh, giving her a little tug. "This is real" She smiled at her, "You're safe…" and whispered, "You're with me now"

Shizuru swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat and then nodded. She then placed her attention to the baby in her arms again, placing a soft kiss on the baby's Chestnut mane, sweetly smiling at her again.

"Miracle" Shizuru then said, facing the girl, "This is Shiaki, your baby sister" she carefully leaned forward and gently placed the baby in the girl's soft arms.

And Miracle smiled widely, her pink eyes on the cooing baby the whole time, totally happy. "It's nice to meet you Shiaki-chan" Excitedly adding, "I promise to be the best big sister ever!"

And Shizuru and Natsuki gazed into each other's eyes, a smile appearing on their lips, listening as Miracle described in detail how much fun they're going to have, all the games they would play, and all the things they would do once Shiaki was older.

"One more time, just this once... Tell me this is real" Shizuru whispered to her, "Tell me I'm not stuck in a dream" her forehead resting against the blunette's.

"This is real" Natsuki happily complied, a hand caressing the brunette's cheek, "You're safe, Shizuru, you're with me…" And then corrected, "You're with _us_ "

And that's all Shizuru needed to hear. She never asked that question again, never doubted it again.

She was safe, she was with her family, she was with Natsuki.

And _in the darkness_ , Natsuki was her light.

 **~ o ~**

* * *

 **Thanks for Reading!**

 **And thanks for the Reviews/ PMs/ Comments**

 **I'm very happy a lot of you liked this story, and I'm happy to have completed it in less than 4 months, YAY!**

 **To the reviewer who asked about the people who tried to kill Natsuki:** I thought I had cleared that up in Chapter 15 but after reading it yesterday again, I realized I posted the wrong version of the document. It was some random little Nation who hired them, who was clearly not happy about giving up their Otomes. I will review chapter 15 at a later time to add this. It was only a few sentences though if I remember correctly. Doesn't interfere or change the story.

 **And I shall continue writing ShizNat in the future, just not riiiight now :) need a long break.**

 **Now I will read ShizNat facfics. I have _years_ of catching up to do, excited to see what others are writing (hopefully something good and original lol)**

 **Let me know what you guys think of the Epilogue. I warned you guys it'd be _short_ and _very sweet_ :p**

 **THANK YOU ALL again for the wonderful support!**

 **"For the love of ShizNat"**


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